Im tired of pretenting im not sad just so people can tolerate me. Im very likable, very sociable, pretty. I miss the guy who made me happy, i didnt have to explain myself he just KNEW ME effortlessly. Its such a disgrace that i lost such an irreplacable treasure - but im such a disgrace now, not taking care of myself - if anyone worthwhile crossed my path now they would have no reason to stop for me. He did though, come to think of it. He scooped me up when i was down when we first met. He was so obedient to making me feel good and giving me attention. One condition and i BROKE IT MY LACK OF SELF CONTROL. I wish he would just make fun of me and get over it instead of leaving me over it. Idk if i'll ever stop missing him. I dont miss anyone else ever
You sound insufferable
What happened?
>>34208265Are you this guy?:>>34205437
>>34208879no i stole the pic
>>34208339actually yk what, neither of us really wanted each other. I didnt seriously confess my feelings to him, i just inappropriately flirted with him. Or maybe if i confessed seriously he would have left me politely instead of hating me, or he would have thought twice about me. I had feelings for him but i didnt even want a committment, so i suppressed my inconvenient emotions, until i got drunk and burst. We loved each other but friendship was the ONLY way. If i didnt try so hard to preserve it by lying, i couldve said how i feel and taken a break until i can be sane abt him or maybe he would have just ended it right there idk but i didnt confess to him not just bc i thought he'd leave me over it but also bc i was scared of him actually wanting me seriously and then all the reality of the committment
It's so infuriating and depressing that i could read his mind so well and he read mind so well. We never had to explain things to each other, how the fuck do you meet someone so predictable and so capable of making you happy and thats all i had to offer in return. He was insulted that i couldnt take him seriously enough, that i still didnt want a committment, that i just wanted a flirtatious situationship. Its not like thats what i really wanted either but thats all i was willing to offer so actually its no wonder he left me. Any other piece of garbage would have lapped up an immature flirt and been fine with a messy situationship but not him
Im not confused anymore. He loved me and he was waiting for a real word that i want him. He deserved that. Thats why he left bc he deserves better than me and my gross immaturity, a rotten flirt, a signal that i wanted to be a sotuationship and waste his time, that his efforts were wasted on me.
But he could also take me or leave me. He would have stayed if i really loved him but that was what he wanted. I actually liked that abt him, he worked hard to show up for me but it wasnt rlly about me. He wasnt fixated or obsessed he just wanted something out of me. I dont even like or get people who get fixated and obsessed on me. Take it or leave it is right, like a relationship contract where you just show up and do your job but you still love each other ofc but its not unconditional like idiots think it isdo yk what i mean
Only players who wanna use you get fixated and obsessed
