Can you give me your most brutal takes on love, dating, relationships for a 20 something hopeless romantic who falls way too hard in love and can't ever let go, even when everyone else just moves on? Just shatter my fantasy with reality PLEASE. I just can't let go and just can't help it. I don't want to be like this anymore. I really don't.
I stopped dating women after I realized that almost every girl in my highschool already fucked someone during the middleshool.
Brutal takes as a hopeless romantic?Well, sex doesn't matter. It really doesn't. It's just a self-pleasuring act that just so happens you have a quasi-synthetic humanoid projection to perform with it.When people think about sex, they think about the fantasy and impulsive drive to it. And that fantasy is always auto-erotic by nature.Sexual pleasure is about themselves. The enjoyment of the other is secondary. Although it is preferable.The true essence of romance is the little everyday things, like bright smiles, sweet words, warm hugs, afternoon coffee talk.And doing things together like watching movies, assembling 2,000 piece puzzles, holding hands and watching the sunset, etc.Because romance requires emotional intimacy, and emotional intimacy requires shared and mutual understanding, which in turn requires empathy, sex fails at the 2nd layer. There's no mutual understanding, only projections....And if you consider extreme acts, it doesn't even require empathy either.I don't know. i'm fucking drunk. Sorry.
>>34265512The difference with .m is she's my soulmate .M
>>34264134You can't really think your way out of it. You have to let it happen and get your heart broken because women hate that shit. Then you'll learn how to fix your behavior.
>>34264836>It's just a self-pleasuring act that just so happens you have a quasi-synthetic humanoid projection to perform with it.Translation : I'm bad at sex.
>>34264134>I just can't let go and just can't help it.You can, you just don't want to. You're literally a love addict, making all of the same excuses for why he just "can't" stop drinking.Out of curiosity, are you someone with an anxious/insecure attachment style who always chases after people who are avoidant?
>>34264134Find a bitch that's also the same way. Some are extremely loyal and clingy. That's what you need.
>>34264836True, but what happens if you actively dislike being touched?
>>34265936Im like that, not OP. What does it mean? I miss my wife and she left with no explanation. Anhero becomes an increasingly viable option
>>34264134Women are programed from birth to behave in a way, as you are as a man.They want to optimize species, being impregnated from the strongest males and parasiting or exterminating the weaker ones.Males and females compete in a vary complex way due to us (humans) are an intelligent species.So this conflict reflects in society. Female brains are more capable of social control so they maintain a structure of privilege as a whole. This appears as small and big advantages and government protections.If you think about it, it's only natural to be that way, they control reproduction.Take it as it is, and chill. We are expendable.You want extreme blackpill? Just see animal females of all kinds. Now compare to women. No difference at all.Human exceptionalism is ridiculous.
>>34266176>programed from birth to behave in a wayThis isn't true.
>>34264152the selection now-a-days is totally disgusting.Got to admit some 20 years ago it wasn't much better. The only difference is that people didn't have their nudes put online nor have a body count after they left hs
I am telling you this right now from experience. You need to be happy being alone first before with anyone else. You will not turn asexual or gay, you'll instead feel reserved and calm around others. Why this happens is because women saw a ton of guys similar in your situation but fucked it up.Out of a ton of guys that look or act like you, there was probably one that sent a ton of dick pics, started threatening her, and attempted rape on her. Do not be him.Now why is this hard? There are fucking assholes on this site, Reddit, at parties, school, and so many other places that when they see you being yourself act like:"Come on man why you being a simp?"Don't fall for that shit. It isn't you being yourself that is the issue it is those damn moments.
>>34264134Are you male or female?
>>34267721Male. Op is male. I knwo this because I am him.
>>34264836This is actually good advice.
>>34264134Idk mate. I've ever loved one girl in my 28 years of life and she recently admitted to having led me on, she abandoned me and she went with one of my closest friends instead. This kind of grief I didn't think was possible, it feels like dying every minute.I'm trying my best, as a hyperromantic individual it feels like I'll never be able to love someone the way I loved her, afterall I never managed to click with someone the way I did with her in 28 years, so it feels like it's over, can't wait for 28 years more, right?Moreso I place so much importance on virginity and the magic of the first time, I thought we were going to take each other and I even began to quietly hope and feel joy, before she shattered my heart.I don't know, I really don't know, all I can say is I empathise with you, right now I try to improve myself (I hit the gym, go to therapy and I'm trying to achieve a few minor goals in life) at the best of my capabilities. I'm hoping life can still surprise me and help me finding new meaning, although I'm not holding my breath.
>>34266138No, you will not. I forbid you to do that. Better days will come. Time heals these wounds. Let your emotions flow naturally so you can process them. If you have someone you can talk to that will shut up and listen, and help you explore your feelings, do that. As time passes you'll heal and you eventually will have forgiven her and be completely indifferent to the current situation. Don't break your mind over trying to find what you did wrong, if even. If she left with no notice, that's on her. So stop wallowing in misery and grow some BALLS.
>>34264134>Can you give me your most brutal takes on love, dating, relationships for a 20 something hopeless romantic who falls way too hard in love and can't ever let go, even when everyone else just moves on?The actual brutal redpill that no one wants to swallow is that you're not a romantic, you're just obsessive and project your fantasies onto other people. If you were an actual romantic the behavior wouldn't bother you, and people would feel uplifted by your romantic gestures. It's like being an artist but your art is shit nobody likes then you lament how terrible it is to be a great artist in an almost dunning-kruger type way. If you're unhappy the problem is almost always internal.
>>34266176That's a bunch of horseshit, obvious confirmation bias around your fucked up nihilistic world view. People are not animals or robots that run an algorithm. There are some parallels between some animal behaviors, but to boil down the human experience to these half baked biological theories of yours is just wrong. Despite how many people function mostly on their reptile brains, this is not the whole story. There are plenty of people out there who have souls and if you ignore that you are part of the problem. So think about it, are you saying this because you had a bad experience with women or some kind of trauma in your life that put you in a frame of mind to only find an explanation for it, or are you truly considering all the facts? It doesn't help much to think like a scientist when you're talking about the human experience. Now, if you're living in some fallen spiritual shithole like Berlin or Paris, you might be right. In that case I suggest you move asap.
>>34264152Really? I WANTED to date chicks that were loose and easy lol>>3426594110/10 answer!!! How can you be sure they are loyal though?>>34265957Then relationships are not for you.
>>34268758This is true, you might be suffering because you're projecting your fantasies onto a person that is NOT like that. This leads to disappointment and falling out of love once you come to terms with reality. You need to be realistic, no matter how emotionally involved you are (OP). And honestly, I'm not sure you can be objective when you're in this state of mind and this is your biggest issue. I saw a lot of dudes bullshit themselves into oblivion once they fall in love, ignoring obvious red flags. If you're doing this you're also opening yourself up for manipulation, so be aware of that. Some general advice is DO NOT try to make yourself something you are not to appeal to the other person. Similarly, don't attempt to change someone else unless it's a minor issue. Do not be hypnotized by beauty and ignore the rest the person. Be realistic with what you have to offer. Be aware of what carries weight in the sexual marketplace (face > money > body). So in general, the more truthful you are to yourself, the less you will suffer.
>>34268819You can cannibalize children together, document it and threaten to release it to the public unless she stays in line. Or, just find a fat ugly chick that nobody else wants.
>>34268832I am OP. I am romantic in the sense that Love is even a possibility with someone. To have an ideal version of someone would be more than I'd be asking for. I'd feel very happy to even have sex, relationship, and love at all from any woman! I am a "romantic" in that sense. I'm just a desperate hopeless bastard lol.
>>34264134Some girls just arent worth it. You may have met girls that did not love you in return. Some of those girls may have interested, some may have wanted the attention. Learn from it. You can love someone and they can love you back. It seems that you are just dealing with prior relationships, I dont think its wrong to be romantic. Just avoid stalking and you are good. Be careful with girls from the past that suddenly show interest in you that ignored you years ago. You are going to know the love from that girl you meet in the future.
>>34264134Romance is a male thing.Hollywood and women would have you believe that guys are always thinking about sex with no romance and women always thinking of romance and asexual... nothing is further from the truth.Women are cold, calculating, and incapable of love. They think they love, but they know not the meaning of love. Love implies, sacrifice and selflessness. Women ALWAYS prioritize themselves and see everything and everyone as tools to be used in serving themselves.This is why women like strong men, tall men, successful men : because these men are USEFUL to them. When their rich husband loses his money they divorce, when they feel he is weak in front of other men they divorce when they see him as taking more than he brings in they leave with NO HESITATION. When they present themselves as singles they are dating and often fucking multiple men at the same time.Men on the other hand, although some are feminized trash like women, are the ones who fall in love till death do us part, go to war to protect their family, love unconditionally.Romance is nature's way to chain men to women for survival of their offsprings. So if you wanna get fucked over to have children and a strong household do it, but if you don't pump and dump. Your choice.
>>34269298The more time passes, the more light relationships ie communicating, hanging out, having sex, doing things together, even having kids with no marriage is more preferable than getting into the icky situation that is marriage and the contract it binds you to.
>>34264134everyone else is a hopeless romantic too its just that they're a hopeless romantic for someone else
>>34268819>How can you be sure they are loyal though?Clingy. Might be loyal, might be the opposite.
Well it does get better with time. I'll tell you what won't work and that is vindictiveness. Chick I fell for suddenly ghosted and I resented her for it, though still made excuses as to why she would do that. Anyways through some internet searches months later found out that her life had been going to shit (like, jail time). In the months before of self-improooovement I thought news like that would make me feel better but actually it just made me sad.
If you want loyalty, get a pet. Women are shallow, deceitful creatures who can't even comprehend love on the same level we do. Want proof? See how a man reacts when his GF cries versus a woman. I know you have a lot of love to give and a lot of life to live but if your experiences with women are as negative as mine, that love would be spent better on a turtle or a parakeet than a woman. You don't need their permission to be happy with yourself.
I once had an LDR with a chick I was obsessed with.Turns out she was fat and ugly.Glad I stayed thin, got a real GF after.She got fat too but I left by then.Don't take women too seriously, they have a "Best By" date
>>34264134Unironically let go. I was suddenly ghosted by my now ex, the woman who I shared the most chemistry in my whole life, around 5 months ago. It hurt for the first few months, but then I had to accept she was gone for good, and that I actually wanted to stay single for a while and understand what the fuck happened. Then another female friend invited me to a valentines event (I friend zoned her a year ago). There I met another girl who I genuinely felt good with and she asked for my phone number, then texted me and we're now going on a date this weekend. This sounds like a humble brag but chances are I might as well get ultimately rejected this weekend, but my point is, you need to keep meeting women and desensitizing yourself to their bullshit, so that you can easily move on and analyze with your brain their behaviour, a lot of men use their dick so they get in relationships with literal demons. It's ok to be a romantic but you can't live thinking about a bitch that doesn't love you at the same level, women aren't like that.
>>34269257>Be careful with girls from the past that suddenly show interest in you that ignored you years ago. You are going to know the love from that girl you meet in the futureActually pretty great advice.
