how do i know if i have depression and how do i cure myself, is it really just routine and keeping yourself busy?
It's about knowing when to let go of your problems and truly believe in yourself despite how bad the world treats you.And you know I get of how I'm retarded and a freak and like this dumb faggot and all, but how the fuck are you gonna be happy if all you do is just justify how miserable you are and tell everyone to fuck off to where you fucked off from your medication.
makes sense, and how can i change what i want? how do i get out of an addiction that is causing me depression? its like going in circles chasing a cup of water when theres a lake nearby, but i never ever go for the lake
>>343705791 - You get trauma. 2 - Your brain says "this is too hard to handle, I'll just slow down to protect you and increase your chances of survival"3 - You become an aimless robot. Not sad, but not happy either.
>>34370623yes, but how do i get out of it? how do i get sheer willpower? is it just routine?
>>34370579Well why do you think you have depression? My suggestion is to first look at your physical health. Are you deficient in anything? Have you been sleeping well? Eating well? Have you been exercising, going outside enough? Have you been socialising enough? Do you worry about finances? Do you have a proper nice and clean environment? Do you feel fulfilled in your job? Do you have friends? Do you have hobbies? Work your ways through these pillars first. If you go to a therapist, they will immediately put you on meds, which will undoubtedly fuck you up. They won't even try to help you, just whatever is the easiest thing to get you in and out.
>>34370631You can't. It's forever.BTW, do not mistake BEING DEPRESSED with CLINICAL DEPRESSION (what I said in the post above).Being depressed = oh no, my cat died I am so sad... or, oh no, my gf left me I am so sad... or, oh no it's raining outside, etc.Clinical depression = you just won the lottery! ok, whatever... or, there's a shooter about to shoot you! ok, whatever... or, it's raining outside! ok, whatever... or, it's sunny outside! ok, whatever, etc.Which one applies more to you? The first one can be worked on with a routine or some pills. The second one is Good Game, Well Played. Just gotta get used to being dead but still forced to live in a body. And yes, it does get boring. No cures.
>>34370623>You become an aimless robot. Not sad, but not happy either>>34370685>Well Played. Just gotta get used to being dead but still forced to live in a body. And yes, it does get boring. No curesgrim, but true
>>34370685shit. im more similar to the second one. i figures it was just because i spend too long on pc doing what i want most of the time so nothings actually fun, like diminishing returns and now im fucked, is it really just GG? i guess if i know i cant do anything about it its easier to move on from it and grow on it
>>34370645im not really deficient in anything, the most id say is not going outside enough or not talking to women in general, but i do socialize every day, eat healthy food, sleep well and dont really worry about many things i know that therapists want you on meds,i tried them pristiq retard i think they were, saw that they did nothing and just stopped taking them. everyone freaked out but i knew they were just wrong, turns out they were and nothing happened. pills are bad, at least as far as i know.
the biggest problem ive found is that i dont want to get better, ive gotten comfortable, and i know im in shit when i know that i can be much better, i can go out a lot more, i can work a lot harder in class, treat people way better, be a lot more productive but i just dont feel like it because i already have what i want so i dont wanna move, like the glass of water thing i said earlier. it makes me feel so hopeless, not wanting to be better, but its not enough for me to actually try and change it. so fucking annoying
>>34370579I feel better if i pretend that i don't have depression. Act as if you're normal and you'll be more normal.
>>34370749Most of the important and necessary things in life aren't done out of genuine desire, anon. It's an unfortunate trick of the mind, but also a powerful expression of will to change even against your own wanting to. When you start lifting, you might have been brought to the gym by a sense of shameful self-loathing, or by a moment of fleeting motivation and inspiration, but that passes quickly. What keeps you going, against every signal your body is sending you, against your mind endlessly justifying why you shouldn't, why it's pointless, why you don't have to, why you can just skip a day, is nothing more than the decision to do so, and the deliberate expression of your will. Basically, it's doing what you know you should, whether you want to or not, whether you even see the value of it or not, simply because you make the choice to, and hold yourself to that conviction. That is how you make those changes; not desire, not motivation, not even in feeling that it's worthwhile, just in the choice, and holding yourself accountable to that decision. If you can master that, you will be the master of your life. It won't cure depression, but it will put you in control of it, and not allow it to dictate the terms. You will be able to say, "I feel like shit and don't want to do anything but rot today, but I won't", and ultimately that will make you feel better, because you'll respect yourself more. Just don't wait around for your brain to mix the right chemicals, or for some epiphany to "unlock" something within you, it will never come and will never last. Choose, and do, that's the only thing that is reliable.
thank you.
another question, why did i get this? is there a cause to this? i dont remember being like this 5 years ago (22m), so thats why i thought it was just something that could be passed over, but i see that its not the case
>>34372622There are all kinds of causes people might get depression. I used to get depressed comparing my life to others. I actually rooted for other people to fail. When I checked facebook and saw someone having a kid or getting married or having a good job it made me kind of mad. Using other people as the yardstick for my own life was depressing. I also have some fatal perfectionism going on, where I beat myself up for mistakes. This is awful of course because everyone makes mistakes. You can also get depressed from your own choices. If you quit your job, never go outside, eat terrible food and get really fat, that’ll probably be depressing, and getting another job, getting /fit/ and being social might help.And there are tons more reasons. I would highly recommend not working through it alone. Therapy improved things greatly for me. If that’s too much trouble, I also highly recommend ChatGPT. It’s actually better than most therapists I’ve had. You can tell it your symptoms, life history, what’s changed for you and it’ll help you understand what’s going on and make suggestions.
>>34372622>why did i get this?it's a symptom of growing up and having an IQ of over 100. you can either choose to keep dwelling in it or pick yourself up and move on with your life, and yes, that means keeping yourself busy.
very good advice, thank you. i have tried chatgpt to some success i will admit, and have currently started going to a therapist. if i may ask, how did therapy help you? i have tried it in the past but it wasnt useful at all.and by not going through it alone, apart from therapist, how do i find someone to relate to? everyone i meet in my life seems normal
>>34372734>if i may ask, how did therapy help you? i have tried it in the past but it wasnt useful at all.All kinds of ways which I will list. To be clear, therapy can absolutely be a waste of time and money, and it has been for me many times, but that doesn't mean it is in general. You might have gone to a therapist who wasn't good, or at least wasn't a good match for you. Therapists can also be limited to what you present to them, so you're misleading them due to shame or masking, that's all they can work with. That said, here's where they've helped me:1. Psychological education. I absolutely recommend reading about mental health so you can know how your mind works, but therapists have spent years studying it and working with other people, so you will want their expertise.2. Diagnosis. I had no idea I had major anxiety until a therapist pointed this out to me. I had assumed my feelings were normal - they're the only ones I know - but the outside perspective showed me where a problem was. Years later another pointed out to me I had trauma to work through, which I never would have suspected.3. Working through cognitive distortions. This is a major one. Your mind probably gets into all kinds of mental traps, telling you things such as sentences that start with "I can't" or "I have to" or other lies. Even if you recognize them, they're hard to overcome without help.4. I got a referral to a mental health partial hospitalization program, which really fixed my shit. I won't explain what that is here but you can look it up.5. Drugs. They can't prescribe, but they can refer you to someone who can if they suspect you need them.6. General life stuff, just talking you through what you're going through is helpful.>and by not going through it alone, apart from therapist, how do i find someone to relate to? everyone i meet in my life seems normalI meant a therapist. If you have someone you can talk to, do it. If not, that's fine. I don't.
>>34370749Like this is a cognitive distortion of some kind. If you truly have everything you want, you have no reason not to be happy other than these mental blocks you've put up for yourself. To put yours in a sentence, "I am underachieving in everything."But maybe you don't actually have everything you want. "I can treat people way better" may come from a real desire to treat people however you're thinking. If that's the case, not treating them the way you think they deserve is going to produce tension in your mind; you're living out of line with your own values.I'm not saying it's one way or the other, just an example of something therapy or ChatGPT could help you figure out. It's a puzzle.
>>34370685>you just won the lottery! ok, whatever... or, there's a shooter about to shoot you! ok, whatever... or, it's raining outside! ok, whatever... or, it's sunny outside! ok, whatever, etc.This exists but it's a lot more rare than you think. The vast majority of clinical depression cases can be worked through in some way.
>>34373033thank you for putting examples, things are clearer to me now. i recognise some of them, and will talk about these with my therapist as well, and maybe some friends. People around me are good for recognising things about me that i dont.>>34373055thanks for the example. i will try to figure it out then.
Whenever I am not around people I am so depressed that I disassociate. Even in those short moments alone I feel it. I want to be part of communities that I bounce around in with no commitment to feel like I'm around people. The loneliness legitimately sucks the joy out of my life.
>>34373088You're welcome. Also, don't completely dismiss meds. I share yours and the other's anons skepticism for antidepressants, but those aren't the only drugs out there. I would not have been able to recover without buspirone for anxiety, adderall for focus, trazodone for sleep. Keep an open mind at least for non-antidepressants.
