I have severe lifelong phimosis and it has ruined my life. I turned down multiple opportunities for dating and/or sex because I was ashamed of my penis and terrified that trying to have sex would result in brutal foreskin injuries. My kissless virginity messed me up in the head for years and caused continuous mental health problems, and I am still a virgin who has never had a GF or ever kissed at age 30.I desperately wish I could have a circumcision, but I'm petrified of the idea of doctors cutting anywhere in the region of my penis. I've also heard that adult circumcision results in 5-7 months of excruciating pain as you wait for your penis to adjust to finally being exposed to the air and other objects.I just wish I had been circumcised as a baby so I could've had a normal life. I would've lost my virginity at age 17 (when a girl first offered to have sex with me) and had a GF and grown up totally normal and well-adjusted from then-on. I feel like I've lost so much.Where do I proceed from here? Stretching is not an option btw, I've tried it since I was 13 years old and it literally has not made any difference. My foreskin is simply too tight to do anything with it.
>>34389310it sounds like your life was "ruined" more due to fear/shame/insecurityur probably better off just continuing to try and live a normal life, and have sex only with someone who'd be understanding & careful while you figure things out
Well bro, it looks like you're gonna have to get over your fear of circumcision and bite the bullet.
>>34389321>it sounds like your life was "ruined" more due to fear/shame/insecurityI literally can't have sex, dude. Even just basic vaginal penetration could result in my foreskin being ripped apart and me suffering the most excruciating pain of my life, and the woman having to take me to the hospital for surgery. Blowjobs/handjobs are also a big no, because the other problem is that phimosis means I can't clean my dick. There's dick-cheese under the foreskin that I cannot get to, meaning my penis forever has a horrible smegma odor.
>>34389310I was gonna recommend stretching because I fixed mine that way in my early 20s. Can you explain why it’s not an option please?
>>34389310I was circumcised at 15, it did hurt and was scary and it would be harder mentally to want to do at your age, but it helped me a lot and I feel better for it. I recommend talking to a urologist and trying to talk to them about it.
>>34389310>I've also heard thatYou've heard wrong
>>34389616>15What? My foreskin didn't retract until I was like 14
>>34389607>Can you explain why it’s not an option please?Because it quite literally doesn't work.I found out I had phimosis aged 13 when I noticed that men's penises in porn looked significantly different from mine. They either had no foreskin at all, or they had foreskin that was much looser and could move around freely. So I looked it up, and I found out I had phimosis. I started trying to stretch my foreskin after that point, doing exercises in hot baths and such. It changed literally nothing. My foreskin is exactly the same, 17 years later, despite all the work I put towards changing it.
>>34389860Man I feel you, it’s a tough situation to be in no doubt. I fixed it in a very short time so I’m wondering if you’re doing the stretching exercises right, especially as an inexperienced teen. Unless you have some unique genetic thing with your skin, it should slowly stretch out if you keep at the exercise correctly. Have you tried to do them as an adult?Also, I know doctors can prescribe some topical creams for you that help with stretching. It’s worth a shot. I’d research and do everything I can before getting a circumcision as that is permanent. But preputioplasty where they widen the foreskin and you still get to keep your foreskin.I’d suggest you make it your mission for this year to fix that shit or at least make progress. When I fixed it I was so relieved, there’s freedom in it.Seriously commit to stretches again and be consistent. If after a month no progress, go to doctor for that cream. If still no progress by end of year, look into that preputioplasty.
>>34389898I just don't feel any motivation to try and stretch it anymore. I spent years pulling my foreskin back as far as I could in a hot bath trying to get it to stretch, it didn't work. Some people say you need to actually jam your fucking fingers in their and try to physically pull apart the opening, but I'm not fucking doing that. It sounds excruciatingly painful.I 100% want to be circumcised but I'm too pussy to go through with it. I hate foreskin. It has ruined my life. I just want to be rid of it. If I ever get out of this situation and I ever fall in love and have children with a woman, I'm circumcising my son(s) at birth, no question.
>>34389910I did that when I was about 13. I had to manually pull it off the glans and it was painful but now it's normal. You won't remember the pain, and it should only take a few months max.
>>34389919I can't do it. I'm too squeamish and sensitive to pain. I wouldn't ever be able to go through with it without crying, wailing and pounding on the walls.
>>34389925You don't want a circumcision, you don't want to pull it back, and you don't want phimosis. Dude I don't know what to tell you. Man up and pull it the fuck back. Just a few minutes every day.
>>34389931I want a circumcision, I just don't want the pain. I want a wizard to wave his wand and poof my foreskin away.
>>34389943It's gonna be pain either way. Pain from stretching or pain from circumcision. Is the foreskin stuck to the glans or is it too tight to retract? I can't feel bad for you man. You're whining about this, but I've been through the pain from stretching. I can't feel bad for you at all.
>>34389950I don't even know. I can only pull it back so far as to create a pea-sized opening where I can see the very top of my penis-head. It has never been any different than this.>You're whining about this, but I've been through the pain from stretching. I can't feel bad for you at all.I shouldn't have to go through with this when 99.9% of men get to be born either without phimosis, or without foreskin at all. It's not fair. My life was ruined through nothing other than pure bad luck.
>>34389964You're not gonna want to hear this, but you're a little bitch pitying yourself for nothing.>I can only pull it back so far as to create a pea-sized opening where I can see the very top of my penis-headI was the same way. Then I pulled it back. It hurt. Oh well. You can either whine about it forever and die alone, or endure some temporary pain, find a woman, get married, and live the good life. Life is pain. It's no worse than getting sick.
>>34389910Ok, what you told me about the way you were stretching it explains to me why it may not have worked. You also say you don’t want to try again, and I hear you, you got zero reward for all that work. But I still want to explain some things about stretching.Yes your penis head is very sensitive. It hasn’t been exposed, so sticking your fingers in there would be like sticking them in a wound. But you can slowly desensitize yourself to it by carefully touching it with lube, letting shower water run over the head (as much you can expose it), and generally playing with it in various ways. Overtime it WILL desensitize enough for you to stick your fingers and pull it apart. Pulling back foreskin alone probably wasn’t enough tension, so you need the fingers. And this isn’t a thing where you put the fingers in there and just force it to open in one go. No, this is holding a moderate amount of tension for a few mins a day, and letting it rest (look up the protocols). Slowly, over time it’ll loosen.Again, you don’t have to and in fact don’t just go right in there with your fingers and stretch. Start by desensitizing your head with the methods I mentioned. Touch how as much as you’re willing to tolerate, it doesn’t have to be a lot. Just keep playing around with it until you’re able to run your finger all over your head under the foreskin (ik you probably cringed from reading that considering how painful it would be now, but you’ll get here eventually, step by step).Regardless of whether I changed your mind, one thing I’m sure of - it will not get fixed until you start taking ACTION. And if you don’t start taking action, whatever it is, you will remain in your stagnancy.
>>34389977I genuinely don't think there's even enough room for me to jam fingers, or anything else, in there. My foreskin is so tight to my penis that there doesn't even seem to be any opening. I don't want to risk messing with that when it could mean I rip my entire foreskin apart and need to go to the hospital.Like I said, my case is quite severe.
>>34389987Have you even gone to a doctor?
>>34389987Ok, I missed the info about how tight it actually is. Yeah sounds tight, and the skin that’s covering it might be thick to stretch out effectively. I’m not sure.Ok so then what do you think of this?First try going to doctor and asking for cream.If no progress, ask about preputioplasty.If you’re not a good candidate, consider circumcision.Like others mentioned, you don’t really have the right to complain if you’re not going to take action. It’s just empty words that aren’t being put to any use.
>>34390002No. I'm too humiliated to do so. I don't want to have to explain to a doctor how my penis is defective. It makes me feel like a subhuman.
>>34390009Keeping yourself stuck and continuing to unnecessarily suffer is also an option, I suppose.
>>34390009Your problem is not that you have phimosis, but that you're a pathetic sad sack who wants to pity himself instead of doing anything.
So Phimosis-kun, you get the courage to get snipped yet or what?
