20 year old man looking to run away from my home. I live with my mother and sister. My mother is the only one in our home with a job, I can't get moving in my life, for mostly financial reasons which preclude everything in my life and everything has been the same every single day almost for maybe 10 years. My life will not change without kickstarting it in some risky way like this, so I want some advice on how I can survive alone with nothing but a backpack, some clothes, and seeing where my trip takes me. I don't know where it will take me if I do this, I can invision crushing misery showing itself along the way, but I will taste of something closer to a freedom I haven't known in 5 years, which is the very possibility of concieving of change. Any advice?
I was homeless for a couple years and I can tell you it's utter dogwater. It's boring. Your feet go numb. There's nowhere to shit on Christmas day. How bout this instead: get a job, any starter job will do, find some locals about your age and pull together and get yourself a house? If you had a girl, and they all had girls, and everyone's working and you're not somewhere ridiculous like SF or NY you could make it work and maybe even have a fun time? Why not aspire to something like that rather than just thinking of mere survival?
>>34392469this fr
>>34392433>run away from homeyou're 20 retard, not a childyou can do what you wish
>>34392469>get a job, any starter job will doI don't know what to get or how to get one, and I don't have a license, I can't do a drivers test until our damn car is fixed, I can't even drive.>find some locals about your age and pull together and get yourself a house?I don't even know how you'd do that, and I've effectively been socially isolated the whole of my teenage years, so I literally haven't known a person in my age range since I was 13 or maybe 14 years old. I'm the opposite of a social butterfly, but maybe, if I lose ties with the people around me, who for some irrational reason I do not understand, feel oppressive, or rather, my mother does, even though she doesn't really impose anything on me. It's some psycholocial thing. I feel at odds with the whole world and my own life and running off, wherever it takes me, speaks to me on some level.>>34392469>There's nowhere to shit on Christmas day.I don't know if you meant to type "do shit" or what, but in any case, the woods are big, there's lots of places to "shit" lmao. Christmas the last 5 years for me have been just any other day for years. >It's boring.So nothing new.>>34392514I guess I can, but I've never undergone any transitional period to adulthood other than the physical aging and developement of my body and brain, and the increased cognizance of doom encricling me. It's a wierd spot.
>>34392561>I don't even know how you'd do that, and I've effectively been socially isolated the whole of my teenage years, so I literally haven't known a person in my age range since I was 13 or maybe 14 years old. I'm the opposite of a social butterfly, but maybe, if I lose ties with the people around me, who for some irrational reason I do not understand, feel oppressive, or rather, my mother does, even though she doesn't really impose anything on me. It's some psycholocial thing. I feel at odds with the whole world and my own life and running off, wherever it takes me, speaks to me on some level.i think you're just shelteredit's probably a bad idea to do something drastic like live on the streetsbut you should take some steps to be more independent somehow, and hopefully learn things & meet people along the way, at a job or whatever
>>34392561>I guess I can, but I've never undergone any transitional period to adulthood other than the physical aging and developement of my body and brain, and the increased cognizance of doom encricling me. It's a wierd spot.i feel youi'm in a similar position but have a driver's license, i think it's more common than it seems for young people latelydriver's permit/license is a priority, but a car is a liability & costs money, so you don't necessarily want to buy a car as soon as possiblehowever, you could live in a car, which would put you a few tiers above living on the streets if you needed to run away
>>34392561Okay so, as I suspected, this is kind of a mental health thing. Having friends and getting a job is meant to be easy enough. It's not easy for you, that's fine, doesn't make you less of a person, you're still very much young enough to fix it. One majorly positive thing is that your mom isn't necessarily abusive, from what you've said. Totally normal to want more independence at your age. Why does running away have to be forever? Maybe you get a sleeping bag and a tarp and a water filter and just go chill innawoods and meditate for a few days or even a week on what you need to do then come back? Do you currently spend all day at home? Likely you do, so why not just hit the bricks as soon as you wake up and see what kind of opportunities you find? To be honest, if you want a simple solution, if I was a friendless guy at your age, I'd join a boxing gym. It's the best way to bond with other dudes besides being in the millitary. And when you're feeling more confident after a few months you can expand your circle very easily. Go get a coffee, make a parsing comment there, little joke here, boom suddenly you have a network. I totally get where you're coming from being young and wanting to do something extreme, and shit, what do I know? Maybe it would work, I don't know you, but what are you honestly expecting to experience? You'll walk a lot, you'll be thinking a lot about food and water. There are other and better ways to go into the unknown, improve yourself, blah blah. Step one, go for a run tomorrow morning. Nothing currently stops you from doing that. Not a dumb bag you have to carry, not your isolation, it's a start on learning to be a disciplined man. Beyond that I've given you my ideas. I wish you well, good luck, don't burn bridges with your mother.
>>34392623If I'm being honest, the thougths of maintaing a close connection to this life I've always lived hurts me. However logical or illogical this is, I know the overcorrective measure of not being connected to it, at least for a time, will free me to become something more of myself. Something I've felt incapable of realizing in my current life.>>34392627I've had a feeling a lot of young men are like me, effectively lost to the world.>>34392632I wouldn't make it a "final" thing, it wouldn't have to be forever, just for a period of time great enough for me to arive at some kind of self knowledge perhaps. >don't burn bridges with your mother.I have no desire to do that. I wouldn't want anything but the establishment of peace and good will between myself and those in my life. >Do you currently spend all day at home?Pretty much, and that's been every day with extremely sparse exceptions since I was 13.I'll consider your advice, and I'll apply the morning run thing, since it's certainly something better than what I do now. I just think that the radical approach I have in mind, whatever it would do, would temporarilly sever me from what seems to limit me.
>>34392662You sound like you have a bit more of a brain than me, maybe a little excursion would be good for you, and I can't deny that I felt I could see society very clearly viewing it from the bottom as I was. Anyway, back when I used to sleep on the ground I didn't think to get a damn pillow. It sounds retarded and it was. My neck still makes a grinding noise when I turn my head even now almost a full ten years later. I am not a cat, neither are you, so get a damn inflatable pillow before you leave.
>>34392687Alright lol. Thanks. God bless.
