as a 28 year old shy loser, is it even possible to become charming and a people person at my age
I don't think so, at least not by yourself. I think you'd need a full time one to one tutor following you everywhere and really hammering you to practice. For 6 months at least, followed by a formal exam.
>>34397405No, lol. Not only is it not possible, but the older you get the weirder you will look and the harder it will be with even common interactions. When you're in your twenties, you can kinda get away with being a "shy loser" or "weirdo". But once you get in your late twenties and 30+, that's when everyone on the street will look at you like a freak. People expect grown men to behave normally, so when they see you they'll look at you like an absolute creep and you'll isolate yourself even more just to avoid those stares.
>>34397405Your self perception influences your behavior more than you imagine. By changing your self perception, you can change your behavior to better suit your goals.Read Psycocybernetics if you want to learn more about it.Also understand that this is all very subtle and it only works within a realistic and limited goal in mind. You can't expect to firmly believe your are a James Bond type fella and it will happen like magic.I need to say this because this is an autistic board on an autistic website.
>>34397470This.
Pretty easy if you start having morning beers
Yes. You can change your behavior. As the anon said above it has to come with a change in your self perception. I will tell you one of the biggest secrets. Much of all of your behavior is in the questions you ask yourself. Ex: you asked "is it even possible to....?" Your results will result in a yes or a no. What good does that do? Not much. Ask yourself useful questions. Ex: "How do a become more of a people person." "What are the things that "people persons" do and how can I learn them?" Questions people ask themselves reinforce the bad thoughts tyey have about themselves.Why am I such a loser? What do you get? Answers that reinforce the idea that you are a loser. Why don't girls/guys like me? You will get answers that reinforce that. Personally, I went through the process. I can talk to anybody. But, I learned that I really don't like people.
>>34397405Yes, coming from someone who became magnitudes more charming at age 30. However, I did join a dating course and got help from experts who took the same route. It was an online course that focused on cold approaching women, plus other things to get out of my comfort zone and build social skills. So yeah you can, and I know it because I did it.What it requires is pretty simple, knowing what actions to take and then taking them. Without it you won’t change, but it is also extremely painful and rough to go through, so care for your health while you do it. The actions are to put yourself into uncomfortable social situations as much as you can tolerate without burning out. The best one is cold-approaching women on the street, in malls, etc. also take an improv class and a dance class. And find a community of likeminded men. It’s easier to do this alone. But I’ll repeat again, DONT BURN OUT. I burned out and messed up some things with my emotions health, but I would absolutely not undo my progress and be a pussy hungry loser agIn.If you actually want to do this, as I said it’ll be painful, but being a stagnant loser is painful as well and you don’t get a reward from that. So, if you’re up for it, look at Alex Leon youtube channel. He was one of my coaches. Find his content, he has tons of high quality content, you don’t need his course, and do what he says. Simple, but VERY difficult.
>>34397626I meant to say “lt’s easier to do this with other people.”The most important thing to remember is it will take ACTION. Physically moving your body in a way that brings you closer to what you want. This isn’t purely a mindset thing where you can just think/rationalize/logic your way out of your problem. You have to act. It’s action that affects reality. If you sit there thinking and doing nothing, you will remain stagnant. You have to act.
>>34397405There comes a point where it's not possible anymore, and the only solution is to kill yourself. I think I'm there right now, 29 y.o shy loser, about to turn 30, got cheated on by my only serious gf, of 5 years, who I found on Reddit.No one wants me, they want successful people. I'm not it. They suck, fuck all of them. Time to next
>>34397691>cheated on by girl on redditdamn thats brutal, i thought leddit girls would be different bros
>>34397405yes, retard
>>34397405Hey OP, shy loser in my 30s here, my advice: fake it til ya make it, cause I was an even bigger lover in my 20s and teens.What I did was grow a beard, wear business casual fancy shirts and pants everywhere I went, always had my shades on in public to avoid eye contact and talking to random crazies, and most important of all: always nod. Sometimes wave, sometimes fist bump, but always nod when ya see people ya know (originally I just turn away and pretend I didn't see them to avoid conversations, but that's just rude). I barely talk to anyone, but started noticing people talk to me more (even tho I hate it and prefer to be alone, maybe it's the beard since I've been getting compliments on it a lot), but I always just nod my way through conversations and only talk if I have to (it's exhausting for me to talk). Tldr: act and look cool and nonchalant, and people will mistake your shyness for the chill quiet type
>>34399216you sound like a hypocritical faggot, i imagine this is how the general normie iscomplete superficial fake npc
>>34399231fuck off
>>34399231Wtf? Hypocrite how? And yeah, I am fake in public, cause I don't wanna deal with people and shit. Just pretend, nod my head, get through life, and hyperventilate when I'm alone after surviving a basic convo. So far it's been working for me. Like to see you offer better advice for OP and me both
>>34399236t. offended fake npc>>34399245nah you fake bc you are just a loser people who are atomaton npcs have no personality etc so everything is just automaton npc reply they hate themselves >Just pretend, nod my head, get through lifeexactly literally an npc
>>34399247Will take that as a compliment, I guess. I'd rather be a loser that fakes and survives social bs than give a fake response and hate myself like everyone else.
>>34399252you literally give only fake responses you even said it yourself kekliteral npc bot
>>34399257Mhm, I give nods and fake acting casual until I can relax when I'm alone. Don't hate myself tho.
>>34399261being an npc is an easy way out, its probably more an ego thing, fat ego afraight of making his actual self look retarded, so he is just a complete fake automaton, imagine dealing with retards like that all day. there you have your average npc normie all fake and gay
>>34397405Yes, but you need a lot of work and you will get almost zero help.First, you must not suffer. Eliminate sources of suffering from your life. Coming to terms with injustices can take about 3 years. You need a group to belong to and a way of life you can see progress on. You could try going out more, talking to girls more, joining all sorts of hobby groups or elective/short uni courses. You could try a radio locution course to better your thinking speed and communication. All these take a lot of money. therapists are a waste after a few 4 or 5 sessions. You need a sponsor.
>>34399282>all these take a lot of moneyBetter to be a shy loser with money, than a social butterfly that's broke.
