I have no spiritual advisors in my life, and in a weird way, my religious friends depend on the vehemence of my faith to keep their own. But in the last few months, I've felt completely disconnected from God. Before now, that was always a pure, active feeling, like a light was shining from somewhere else into the depths of my heart. But although I still pray, and although I've been more responsible about living piously (more prayer, fasting, etc), the...light and warmth are gone. A priest or minister would tell me it's because I'm a faggot, but I only found God and only ever felt connected to him after I accepted that I was a faggot. In fact, I seriously felt that this was a kind of blessing which humbled me with the knowledge of my sinful nature: the patience and understanding this impression gave me also endowed me with the strength to promulgate Christ's glory and His morals to dozens of people who needed it, and who never had someone come to meet them where they are with the Good Word. Moreover-- and this is difficult to explain-- it provided me a mission in love: I found a beautiful, pure, and sweet person to be with who needs my love and protection. She was raped as a child and beaten, put out on the streets and sex trafficked, forced onto drugs and exploited into selling herself, and then finally she found me, and I found her. Despite everything, and despite the trauma she battles with all day, there's also nobody more ardent about God's gift of life and God's kindness, and she's been an inspiration to me to remain steadfast. But still, I can't help but feel like...I'm out of hope, like we all live in the end times already, and I can't find the religious feelings I had until, out of nowhere, they disappeared. I don't know how to cure myself of this impression, how to find my strength and hope again, or how to regain the sense of God's presence. What should I do, religious anons?
>>34400510so youre a gay faggot whos together with a raped trafficked girl whos asking about god?ye seems like a typical 4chan thread
>>34400515Yeah, that's uhmm the gist of it. Like I said, I don't have any spiritual advisors in my life. Normally it's enough to read the Bible or Boethius or something, but it hasn't worked.
>>34400510The sooner you realise God isn't real, the happier you'll be.
>>34400510ex-religious agnostic here, but I've been in your exact shoes (minus the fag part). I can't say for certain what kind of relationship you have with your faith, but figuring out your best methodology will help you drastically. for me, it was mostly defined by study when I was in the church. I wasn't even the slightest religious before I started going, but I ended up there because crazy religious mother got custody and the girl I liked went to that church. while my initial reasons alone were iffy, by time I got comfortable and incorporated it into my lifestyle I just kept wanting to learn on my own, for my own sake, and figuring out new ways to incorporate the word into my actual life provided me with alot of motivation. by time a year and some change passed, I was going to church pretty devoutly, working there (which was another source of satisfaction), and studying script on my own, all without my mother or ex's presence. I basically had to take baby steps, but it's very possible to turn minor routines into your lifestyle, which luckily you're not starting from nothing. don't get too ahead of yourself with the thought of needing to be accepted by the church or God in order to go back to practicing, simply going back to practicing with earnest in your spirit will be enough. as for the terrible things going on in the world thing and learning how to cope with that, if religion doesn't work then learning up on other crazy times in history can help put things into perspective. (or make it worse if you're obsessively anxious)
Read the antichrist by Nietzsche
Look up Dark Night of the Soul
>>34400515imagine thinking this made up over the top horseshit was real, or actually happened.This never happened and is fake, but even if it WAS real, it would never be posted on 4cuck.
>>34400510Did you read the book of Genesis? God destroyed the city of Sodom and Gomorrah because of their sin: The grievous sin of sodomy, giving themselves to fornication, and going after strange flesh (genesis 18:20 & Jude 1;7). So don't say you found God after Accepting yourself as a "faggot". If you want to find God you need to repent and put your faith in Jesus, only his blood can pay for your sins. He is the only mediator between God and men (1 Tim. 2:5). Also you won't find God in church building and make sure to use a KJV.
>>34400997It's unfortunately very real.>>34401055Yes, I have read the entire Old Testament, and I know that I am living in a condition of sin. Believe me when I say, though, that I cannot "pray away the gay": for most of my life, I tried to repress it, and in the process I suffered such an intolerable sickness of spirit that I would rather love God and be damned than dwell in such an intense contempt for life. It's not the right life--I am not a righteous person--but I desperately want to do my best to honor God, even as I'm failing.>>34400887This is sensible and kind advice, thank you. I read scripture and theology frequently, but from how you describe your own experience, I can see there's a lot of work I can do to form substantive habits and, by extension, a more religious life.
Delude yourself into thinking that a specific and unconfirmed spiritual force created everything and has some arbitrary plan for you, then spend your whole life in preparation for that transcendence-through-death-pie-in-sky where you will be a servant forever; someone's bitch without end. Christianity is so cucked that a man has to share his wife with God contractually, but people just eat it right up, lacking the mental capacity to closely analyze a doctrine that is the irrefutable word of their god regardless of the most obvious flaws and contradictions.Believe what you want, but be sure to read all the warning labels.
>>34401437You know, I thought the same thing before I accepted I was gay.
>>34400510You seem to believe that God is a feeling or a moment of inspiration, but feelings are fleeting.
Be completely silent for a week, that should help.
>>34400523I'd suggest reading "Through the Gate of Good", also titled "Christ and Conduct". The message it contains is that a person connects with God through his conduct, not by any other means. Virtuous living will bring you closer to God. No amount of dogma or doctrine can replace conducting yourself with compassion, love, patience, forgiveness and humility. When you perfect those qualities in yourself, you'll always feel close to God, because those qualities are God.
>>34401437>lacking the mental capacity to closely analyze a doctrineThat applies to you and your opinions even more severely than the people you're attempting to strawman. If you had bothered to look into Christianity at all you'd have traced it back to its Neoplatonic roots and realized that all of its precepts are meant to be practiced, and that the practice of those precepts naturally leads to a better life here and now.
