I found out the guy in seeing for a couple years now lied about basically everything. Who they are and even how they communicate with me is just repeating what others say. I also found out that a lot of their time is spent making false situations and interactions with things around me just to manipulate how I see something, feel about it, and ultimately just control what I decide. They also feel like a dead end. I'm not going anywhere with life here and miss the opportunities I used to have to get what I want in life. I miss who I used to be, well, I still am. Just worse for wear now. Once I saw this I started looking for it. Interpreting things in a different light, my own, to view each situation if it's just another narrative made subversively by him to harm me. I've found that the majority of everything is this and it basically removed all feelings for him and I don't trust him, could never trust him. I've decided to leave and move in with my mom again to get my footing back to where it was before I was sidetracked by the narc. I'm upset and angry. I feel hurt and manipulated. I hate that he took years from me, things from me that he never deserved. That id do anything to remove him from my life and just be done with it all. I've tried to make space for myself to process but he keeps creating these narratives to manipulate me and I'm just tired. I miss direct honesty. I miss the life I had before I lost these years. What do I do to regain my footing? What steps do I take? It feels like a lot even though it is freeing to not feel the way the last several years have put on my back. I never wanted that weight and it's only harmed me. Can you help me see what steps to take? A lot of feeling I've had from before have been stirring in me and I'll be honest, it feels good. Better, safe, honest.
>>34402754What steps have you taken to completely cut this guy out of your life?
>>34402797You are right. I need to do that, cut him out.
I'm miserable and spend time all my time online to avoid life here. I fucking hate texas. I recognize I try to justify my choices I made because I can't bear to feel the guilt and shame of losing you. But I still feel it and now it's been so many years. How do I fix this. I hate everything
>>34402754Break with him and get on with your life
>>34402902I know. I need to.
>>34402754Sounds familiar. Make a plan to get a job where your mom lives. Get your hair trimmed. Don't talk about your relationship, just say it didn't work out. See a psychologist if you're able too.
>>34403015You need to do it yesterday
If he is hurting that bad you could probably just try and talk to him. If you can't even communicate on a basic level, something in one of your lives needs to change drastically to make any progress on the relationship. When that happens most couples just split up. Honestly it sucks because I doubt either party will realize that it's okay to be single.
>>34402836>You are right. I need to do that, cut him out.You do. And you really do need to cut him out COMPLETELY. Block him everywhere, delete him from your contacts.
>>34403152Why get my hair trimmed and why not just say why I broke up with him when asked? >>34403329I don't have any compassion for how he feels with what he did to me. He doesn't deserve my communication. Why wouldn't it be okay to be single? >>34403532I will.
>>34402754I think you are doing well recognizing that you love the guy from years ago. Choosing him and making it known to him should be your priority
>I hate that he took years from meThis is why I advise on 1-2 year long relationships. Any longer and you're basically married.It works for getting married in your 20s with a bodycount while everyone else is kinda fucked by the time they get there.
>>34404832Absolutely why I need to break to with who I'm with now
I can have the life I've always needed. I will be happy.
>>34402754I dated a narcissist for 5 years, it was never disclosed that she was sick. I had to wade through all the lies and inconsistencies myself to uncover that she is a deceitful two-faced whore.Get away ASAP unless you legitimately want C-PTSD and lifelong trust issues
>>34405393The only time I felt happy was when my ex fullfilled me. I am so attracted to him. I keep looking at his insta and twitch and you know ...
>>34405444No, I don't. My ex lovers are all essentially dead to me.
>>34405457I do. I'm a virgin and I never stopped loving him.
