I'm just going to state things plainly. I am a male in his early 20s who is rather good looking. I have never suffered from lack of attention from women however due to several psychological issues (primarily self doubt and crippling anxiety) I remained almost entirely sexually inactive until about 2 years ago when I met my current GF. I have always known what I wanted in a relationship and had no issue turning down girls who I thought were incompatible. That being said, I am socially retarded. One of the primary reasons why I am dating my current GF is because prior to us officially dating we sat down and had a long discussion about life goals, plans and of course what we were sexually interested in. We both agreed that we wanted a partner who was into rather deviant behavior, but who would also be there for the other person at the end of the day. After almost 2 years, none of what we have discussed has occurred, and if anything our sex life burnt out after about the first 3 months.There are other issues with our relationship however I believe they are downstream from our defective sex life. It has gotten so bad that I have had both male and female friends of mine tell me to break up with my GF over this singular issue. We both have extremely high libidos, but this sexual tension is leaving us both upset. Outside of this singular issue, we have what many would consider to be an idyllic relationship for a couple our age. If I'm not making sense, let me know and I'll correct myself. Also, the few friends of mine who have given me advice that isn't "break up with her" have not worked, and I genuinely am running out of ideas.
>>34405198You were told what you needed to know. You are not compatible with her. Either accept that and move on or keep floundering about while everyone tells you the same thing
>>34405212Unfortunately its not that simple. If I could simply break up with her that would be that, however every other part of our relationship is arguably ok. I worry that if I break up with her I may end up with someone who I am sexually compatible with but who I am severely incompatible with in every other area of my life. Also breaking up with her at the present moment would seriously fuck up both of our finances and could potentially leave one or both of us homeless due to the present financial situation.
>>34405219It's not just about you. She would be happier and more compatible with another man
>>34405222She has no interest in leaving the relationship, and she has said as much. The other issue is that she has very little interest in men, yet dated me for some reason. I do not know why she is adamant about staying in a relationship, but if someone is going to end it it will have to be me, and if someone is going to fix the relationship it will have to be me.
>>34405198Ignore your friends who tell you to break up. There's two types of people to consider when taking advice: Those with experience in your same issue who have succeeded in overcoming the issues.& Those who who failed due to insular thinking and retardation.The retards are those who tell you to break up in an otherwise functional relationship over a singular issue. The retard is the one who doesn't even see long term relationships as precursory to marriage, and they think it's good practice to burn the entire bridge when one thing does not go their way. There are many retards on this planet who will tell you to break up. You should only consider break up if you are with someone who is taking away from your life objectively. If she is adding to it, albeit not in the way you would like, this is still workable. The retard will tell you it's a compatibility issue. That's another retardism because relationships never come prebuilt or predestined. Relationships are built and grow over time and the "compatibility" is hand made and tailored by both partners in a process of reciprocated communication and listening to one a other. It takes work to build it up.Something zoomer retards know nothing about, they expect people to just magically fit like a glove for them. And they wait for "Mr" or "Mrs" perfect.And they never come. Or if they do, its an act that fades after honeymoon phase. And they are back to square one.
>>34405240>Something zoomer retards know nothing about, they expect people to just magically fit like a glove for them. And they wait for "Mr" or "Mrs" perfect.>And they never come. Or if they do, its an act that fades after honeymoon phase. And they are back to square one.I am trying to avoid going back to square 1. I do not know exactly what caused the issues in our relationship as we were heading in a very good direction. The only think I can think that may have caused some of these issues may be that she got a birth control implant and I know from reading various posts on here and elsewhere that the implant can cause a number of unwanted psychological changes. I also agree with you, it is easier to fix a relationship that is mostly going in the right direction than start over completely from scratch. What I am generally upset about were things we both discussed in detail and had interests in and then for various reasons didnt happen. I know she still thinks the same was as we periodically discuss these things, but I'm still working on trying to figure out how to fix the issue.
>>34405240>>34405198>ContinuedYour GF did not lie to you about her sexual interests. What your GF did was what a lot of insecure and anxious girls do. She exaggerated her sexual interests to you. You are going to be shocked to realize this, but women do not have the same type of sex drive that we men have. This should be obvious to anyone, but women's sex operates on a fixed hormonal cycle that follows ovulation and then menstruation. Their hormones are peaked at both occurrences meaning they are at their horniest during a window of days twice a month or so. Whereas for men our sperm production is never ending, always churning, and we can be horny anywhere between multiple times in a day or at least several times in a week. And women do not operate like this, they never have and never will. That's just reality, bro.However what women do to compensate is they will sexually gratify the man she wants to please. And when girls date a guy at the start they really want the guy to like her to want her, to love her. So what do they do? They crank up the sex appeal, they deliberately appease the man sexually even when she herself doesn't feel as horny as he does. All women have done this, it is called "seduction". Mature people can handle a bit of seduction. Immature people get twisted over it, both the seducer and the seduced. The seducer becomes burnt out and exhausted of the performance eventually and the seduced demands the performance to last forever and feels lied to when it ends. That's the problem with seduction, it does not operate on full honesty. This is what separates lust from love. One is honest and the other not so honest. But the 'lust' in harmless seduction during dating phase is not lying or meant to hurt or deceive. It's just the chick really wanted you to like her and love her so she pleased you. That's because she is a chick, that's what chicks do. Find out what her love language is and 'speak' it to her. Then the sex comes back
>>34405273>You are going to be shocked to realize this, but women do not have the same type of sex drive that we men have.She has a higher sex drive than me. The only time she has not wanted sex was when we have had so much sex she was rubbed raw. Yes we use lube. The rest of your post just seems like basic information that gets spread around the internet from time to time. My own lived personal experience suggests that women have very similar libidos to men and the idea that women only get horny during certain times of the month or that they have lower sex drives seems to be something that some women use to avoid having sex with men they're no longer sexually attracted to. Birth control can also fuck up a womans sex drive. >>34405273>But the 'lust' in harmless seduction during dating phase is not lying or meant to hurt or deceive. It's just the chick really wanted you to like her and love her so she pleased you. That's because she is a chick, that's what chicks do. Find out what her love language is and 'speak' it to her. Then the sex comes backWe still have sex on an almost daily basis, about every other day, sometimes more than once a day. The issue is that we are both into things that the other is not into. For example, while she is sexually interested in me she has almost no sexual desire for other men. On the other hand, she has explicitly stated that she has an interest in banging other women, something I am fine with as we discussed this prior to dating. Instead of understanding that she will need a woman to fulfill things that only a woman can do in bed, she expects me to be able to do these things as well. These problems are only compounded by the fact that we're both bisexual.
Just fuck? Like what are these deviant sexual interests that are just so insatiable and gratifying and temptatious and tantalising and irresistible that you just must absolutely must engage in them no matter what?!
>>34405289I am confused then because in your OP you wrote:>After almost 2 years, none of what we have discussed has occurred, and if anything our sex life burnt out after about the first 3 months.If your sex life burnt out it implies it's diminished in frequency.
>>34405297Ok I should have stated intensity and not frequency. We effectively have sex as a replacement for masturbation. It sometimes genuinely feels like a chore. >>34405291read my other posts.
>>34405301>Ok I should have stated intensity and not frequency. We effectively have sex as a replacement for masturbation. It sometimes genuinely feels like a chore.Okay so you are fucking but you aren't making love, that's what that is. Fucking is when you both mutually masturbate using each other's bodies, driven mostly by your own fantasy fulfillment. And making love involves connecting to each other emotionally and vulnerably in the present moment in a two-way communication using both your bodies and adorning each other in rapturous affection while penetration occurs. One gets old and dull and becomes a chore yeah. The other rejuvenates the relationship every time it happens. You ever made love to her yet?
>>34405301No.
It's over
>>34405310>You ever made love to her yet?Yes ffs. The first 3-4 months of our relationship were great. Honestly after the implant things went to shit. Birth control essentially turned her into an anxious wreck. It is hard to make love to an anxious wreck. The other issue is that even after having very good sex, not the masturbation replacement sex, we will both feel unsatisfied. >>34405315sounds good.
>>34405332Retard too lazy to answer a simple question
>>34405332>Yes ffs. The first 3-4 months of our relationship were great. Honestly after the implant things went to shit. Birth control essentially turned her into an anxious wreck.Then you've located the major issue, her oxytocin levels are undoubtedly shot to shit because as you already know, that's exactly what birth control does. Here is a brief report on what birth control does for a relationship:>"hormonal birth control can affect oxytocin levels and how the brain processes this "love hormone." Studies indicate that hormonal contraceptives (HC) may increase basal plasma oxytocin levels, but paradoxically suppress its behavioral and emotional effects, such as reducing the brain's reward response to a partner's face."So effectively she no longer sees passion or love in your eyes when you fuck. Courtesy of birth control, my man. Nasty shit right? If only the pharmaceutical companies were honest to the public. Who am I kidding, they'd make no money if they did that. Get her off the birth control
There is no fixing this
>>34405351She will be getting the implant out in the next few months during a routine gyno appointment. What is very interesting is that not only has birth control fucked up her anxiety, but it has also made her significantly less sexually explorative and she seems to have a harder time explaining what she wants or needs. When I try to help on my end it often causes more trouble. She is planning on trying a non-hormonal form of birth control and I hope that the effects of her current birth control go away quickly.
>>34405364Good, once it's out it needs to stay out. Birth control is an absolute blight and emotional cancer that for some reason people really love to choose. (We know the reason, it's because they want to be able to bust raw without a condom without pregnancy consequences). And I can't blame you or her for it, intimacy is a good thing and having sex raw is as intimate as the body can get. So I understand.The effects of her current birth control will go away yeah but it'll be a slow rebuild. It takes 3 - 6 months. Same as it does after a child birth (that's how birth control works, it tricks the woman's hormonal system into believing it's pregnant when it's not, hence the ceasing of ovulation). It also gives the woman the anxiety and low mood and even weight changes of a pregnant woman too. Another thing that pharma really doesn't like advertising lol.If the 'non-hormonal' form of the birth control ceases, disrupts or alters her ovulation in any way it's gonna repeat the same problem, just a heads up. Doesn't matter if that's pill form or not. Her body needs to be able to produce an egg and then bleed out in cycles for her hormones to be balanced. If I were you I'd just stick with the condoms. If not at least track her period cycles and have sex only during low risk windows. That's how the Catholics do it in order to have sex unprotected without kids happening, you just find out which days of the months have no egg and then go to town
>>34405377>If the 'non-hormonal' form of the birth control ceases, disrupts or alters her ovulation in any way it's gonna repeat the same problem, just a heads up. Doesn't matter if that's pill form or not. Her body needs to be able to produce an egg and then bleed out in cycles for her hormones to be balanced.She's planning on a copper IUD which from what I have researched will have none of the effects that her current birth control has. Cycle tracking has an abysmal rate so we're not going to go with that and we both hate condoms.
>>34405383True copper IUD will bypass the hormonal problem. Doesn't come without it's problems though. You know how it works right? The copper coil they shove up your woman is meant to release copper ions that deliberately cause localized inflammation so that her uterus thinks it has an infection to release fluids which inadvertently kills off sperm.Has a chance of causing chronic pain or discomfort which can affect enjoyment of penetration. Also a chance of perforating her inside. And if it does fail or if you guys do decide to take it out and have kids one day, chances of ectopic pregnancy is high. And ectopic pregnancy is a killer, not just for the fetus but the woman too. Some women have to have portions of their uterus or Fallopian tube removed entirely if it's bad. Idk man, cycle tracking rates are easy to master if you acknowledge sperm can live 6 days inside the vagina. Just calculate that when busting in a safe window and it's good
>>34405410>>34405383Btw don't you think it's kinda crazy? The whole brith control shit? If we're not feeding our women with drugs to shoot their oxytocin levels to shit and trick their bodies into thinking it's pregnant to cease eggs, to the point their brain can't even associate our face with 'love' then we're having them shove copper coils up their vaginas to deliberately cause uterine inflammation using foreign metal ions in the body to kill sperm it's like man.. all that shit just to shoot a sticky rope in a pussy? It makes one wonder: Why the fuck are humans so absurd?
>>34405422Who could have known that the "safe and effective" treatments doctors shilled to artificially shut off the one of the most important systems in a woman's body would have massive consequences
>>34405506>Who could have known that the "safe and effective" treatments doctors shilled to artificially shut off the one of the most important systems in a woman's body would have massive consequencesLol right? I think the medical-pharma complex knew it would. The consequence is intentional, to stop people from reproducing. And they are blameless because those who seek their poison want their poison, they want to not reproduce and/or lose their own reproductive capabilities, they sign up for it. Lured in by the promise of waking wet dreams, of hedonic pleasure unrestrained, which was sold to them by the porn industry. The conspiritard in me wonders if this was also an intentional two pronged approach. Make people want to go extinct and you win. Population decrease, means more resources for the wealthy. And the saps who fall for it are content with just an orgasm and that's it. I ain't an illuminati pharaoh nigga myself but I gotta admit it's a clever trick if that's what they're doing.
>>34405198> Is it wrong to break up with someone No, it's your absolute right to break up for whatever reason you want, even if others think it's stupid. >We both agreed that we wanted a partner who was into rather deviant behaviorThat said, I do think you're stupid.
>>34405219>Also breaking up with her at the present moment would seriously fuck up both of our finances and could potentially leave one or both of us homeless due to the present financial situation.Don't marry her before you marry her
>>34405198You still haven't told us exactly what it is about your sex life that isn't working for you. I'm not sure how you expect us to help without knowing that. It would also be useful to know whether you've tried talking to her about the problems, how you have tried talking to her, what she said, and whether you have tried relationship counselling or a sex therapist.All I can say at the moment is that, it the problems started when she had her implant, it would be unbelievably retarded to break up with her before you see what happens after the implant is removed.
>>34405198She's already your gf, so you can just take her and do what you want to do with her without asking.
