If you had no friends would you get into an LDR with no real chance of ever closing the gap for real? The girl loves you for some reason, you spent four months together, but you realized your extremely worthless career wiseand have no chance of changing it.
>>34407837No
>>34407837I don't recommend putting all your eggs in one basket, and jumping in a relationship and use it as a sort of clutch, expecting it to fix all of your problems... that being said, Maybe the relationship can kickstart the person into changing things in their life? If the girl likes the person, she probably saw something good in them, so why not own it, and try to become an even better person, for her and, most of all, for their own self?
>>34407875Because I'm trying as hard as I can it's not enough. To actually be with her would require and amount of income that I'm not capable of earning currently and it looks like it's not going to change despite my best efforts. We've been together a year and I don't want to waste her time. She's naive
>>34407919If you really like her, I think it might be good to keep trying. If she is aware of your financial situation and still wishes to be with you, then why not remain together?But that doesn't mean you shouldn't also keep trying to find ways to improve your life as well. Save some money if you can, and try to learn new things so that you can get into new opportunities. If you can rely on your parents and other people, you can maybe even try to ask them for a bit of help on the matter, too.
>>34407837My career is going very well. I would choose a ldr for the right girl and would be up to traveling in person
I had attempted this across 8 years. I visited her once early in the relationship and then it took 5 years to see her again as it was her turn to visit me - by then the relationship deteriorated and most of the stress came from the expectation of a career to bridge the gap. Funnily enough after she ended it with me I got the career start that would have launched financial security between us, oh well. If you do it all for one person just remember In life you exchange one thing for another just out of reach, and it might not be your choice in what it is.
>>34407987Why were you willing to wait eight years?
>>34407987be friends. support each other through 'relationships' you guys may have.. don't bee scummy and turn things dirty. be respectful of their life but make an effort to actually be a part of it. do not seek having a romantic relationship. if it happens organically - discuss what you expect as well as common desired goals and timelines. if either of you are in a serious relationship, i suggest telling your partner
>>34408257Because they were the only one where I felt a proper connection with.>>34408412I wanted to be friends but that is unlikely as well, I needed time away for a duration to heal after she ended the relationship, I wasn't there for them during a stressful point in their life; but it wasn't my duty to be, I was tired of being the sponge to all woes in someones life from across the globe. Now the connection is severed, not even the once a month message check-ins. Don't need to tell me, any sexual thing or dirty was thrown away the moment they said to not do it and i dutifully obliged, even though they were frequently the one to be so. The relationship was more of a hold over into pragma, turned into pen pals with the illusion of a conventional romantic relationship, she only ever wanted a mortgage and household but that is where the milestone goals slipped past the deadline. I don't seek any romantic relationship anymore - that was the serious relationship.
>>34408477Try being closer friends, make plans to visit each other at least once this summer, respectfully. Make it a point to reach out daily (not on chan) and rebuild the friendship. Maybe it wasn't the mortgage she wanted but that might help ease her stresses and make having the relationship easier
>>34409245I dont know that was planned before but it just sounded like she only suddenly wanted to do things with me now that I had a job, like going on trips, play video games together. At the time it felt like she just wanted the actvities and benefits of a relationship without the relationship, completely ignoring how hurt I had become. I said after a year of work, its been a year and it is ghost town. Likely found someone else to pay attention to her.
