For once in my life a woman is actually interested in me and I actually like her also. I rarely get attention from women and it feels great honestly. However, I am 34 years old and she is 40 years old. I have actually never had a girlfriend and a friend strongly suggested that I do not date this woman. Mostly because I haven't had many experiences and dating a woman in her 40's is a large jump apparently. I also would like to have kids in my life and I am not sure how easy / hard that is to do as individuals above 30. What really kills me is that I really do like her. She is so kind to me and we have good conversations. I try to keep things at friend level but she has implied wanting to go out on a date with me. Ultimately, I consider her a friend but do you think it would actually be okay to date her?The biggest reason for not dating her is the age gap and the fact that I do want to have kids and get married etc. Like if she were my age, I'd ask her out in a heartbeat. How would I even tell her? "Hey, I don't want to date you because you are 40+" Sounds cruel. Help.
Go for it
Rampant misogyny of 4chan and the internet aside, women can still get pregnant over the age of 40. It stops when they hit menopause. Which will happen in a few years, so time is ticking. Date her for fun, to learn about her. Then she may tell you she doesn't want or can't have kids and then you'll know. The most important thing is that both of you get laid.
>>34440160Wouldn't it be cruel to date her with no intention of really being with her though? I think that is what I get confused on. I don't want to harm my friend. I find it hard to date someone knowing that it won't work out. A different friend even suggested I try and just date random women even if I don't like them because I need experience but that seems cruel to me. Why date someone you don't even like?
>>34440182NTA, but I was in the same boat, even the age gap checks out. I was always dating her knowing some day I'll want to move on and after 1,5 years, that's what happened. Is it cruel? We had a great time together and I don't regret it, doubt she does either. Go for it anon, it's not like you'll be marrying her tomorrow, you might just end up sleeping couple of times
>>34440333I can't do that to her I think. Not saying you are wrong for doing what you did but I just wouldn't be able to bear it. Especially if we get attached to each other. Maybe it was never meant to be. Fuck... I have never felt so distraught. I think a lot of this stems from me having like no dating experience. Its so hard to find a woman who likes me and I actually like her back and vice versa.
>>34440342OP, you need that dating experience man, it'll change you
>>34440346But is it worth the cost of potentially emotionally harming a bunch of women? I honestly don't care if I ever get my heart broken. I actually expect it. Not sure if that is a good or bad thing. What I don't want to do though is go around playing with other peoples feelings. That to me seems too far. However, having next to no dating experience really weakens me because I don't even know what I really like I guess. Or how I even would behave in a relationship. A friend once told me that a lot of men think they would never cheat until they are put in a position that is opportunistic. So what if I am actually a weird cheater at heart or something. Who knows? There is a lot I don't know about myself because I haven't been in those situations. I have kissed one woman and she was the one to initiate it.
>>34440358Stop moping anon. You're worrying about harming "a bunch of women" despite having next to no experience and being potentially a "weird cheater", get over yourself. You like her, ask her out, see where it goes
>>34440113> she is 40 years oldIf it's only sex and fun then why not.If it's relationship, family, kids then she is expired milk. Toss it out.
>>34440113Go for it, date her. Also, ask yourself whether you are okay with adoption since natural conception can be difficult at 40
>>34440182I don't think it's cruel. What if she turns out to be the love of your life. Or what if she turns out to be a total bitch you hate. This is always the risk when entering a relationship; if you find a sexy, fertile, 20 year old, there's no guarantee she won't divorce you, take the kids, and turn them against you. I'm not black pilling you, but that's what dating is for, to learn about each other. If she tells you she can't have kids, it'll be time for you to be a dick and breakup, but usually that level of personal knowledge won't come out until you date someone. But if you say "that's fine I also don't want to have children. And stay for years before breaking up because you really do want children, that's fucked up.
>>34440358This one is funny, because I also think of the moral implications of breaking someone's heart. That's why you don't marry people right away and don't become financially intertwined either. Dating is, as the word implies, spending scheduled time together, and eventually it can become more and more intimate. Breaking up is hard to do, but that's going to be part of the experience with anyone. Sometimes breakups are easy, sometimes they are hard. Not wanting to ruin the friendship is common, but you won't get that desired pussy without it.
>>34440358>But is it worth the cost of potentially emotionally harming a bunch of women? Yes.Seriously though you seem to have this idea that you "only date those whom you would marry" -- that is the wrong way to look at dating, op.Just ask her on a date, and tell her honestly your thoughts. She may just want to be your fuck buddy.As others have said, you need dating experience because you are over romantizing the early stages.
>>34440113at 43 that means dating a woman my mom's age. No thank you.
>>34440113Where love falls, where the heart leads. Dont worry too much, have a great time.
>>34440113If you're looking to have kids, plural, then a woman who is past 40 may not be the best option. But in all other respects, dating an older woman is great. It's so much better having someone you can actually talk to - engage with intellectually as well as physically. And the sex is amazing. If I were you, I would go for it; but then again, I never wanted kids.
