I've decided to avoid and ignore my work crush completely because I've realized it's the only way for me to get over her, as I'm still infatuated with her, and we see each other every day. However, while this strategy creates physical distance, I don't think it creates emotional distance, as I have to organize my whole workday around her. I also have to constantly fight the urge to manufacture situations where I could theatrically ignore her to make my point. Is there a better way to do this?So far, I've:>cut down interactions to the absolute minimum required by work,>started exiting interactions as soon as possible,>stopped talking to her, except for short answers to her questions,>stopped greeting her, even in response,>stopped smiling at her, even in response,>started avoiding not just eye contact, but directly looking at her altogether, even when talking to her,>started leaving the workplace during breaks to avoid seeing her interact with other men.For context, I was into her because I thought she was into me, but it turned out she wasn't, which left me shell-shocked. She said she wanted to be friends, but then she didn't initiate or reciprocate at all, so I stopped trying. Now we are half-hearted acquaintances, but I grew to resent her and this dynamic, so I'm looking to end it. My goal is to no longer know her and to be able to work without paying attention to her existence. She's a much more socially adjusted person, and I think she's okay with our current relationship, so this might hurt her a little, but it's a price I'm willing to pay.Thanks for reading. Any insight is appreciated.
you should shit in the floor that tip tap on the turds without interrupting eye contact with her, if she approaches, roundhouse her with your feces covered shoes
>>34449584You were always half-hearted acquaintences. Co-workers can never be friends, they're just people you talk to to pass the time until it's time to fuck off back home.
>>34449596Very funny.
>>34449621>You were always half-hearted acquaintences.Maybe. But how do I make sure we become even less than that (nothing)? I thought I'd ask her not to talk to me anymore, but anons said it was a bad idea. So I started avoiding and ignoring her, but I'd like to avoid centering my life around her like this.
>>34451162The way to do it is to have a word with yourself internally in what is called an examination of conscience. Or you can do this externally by listening to yourself when talking about it with someone (or from writing about it in journalling). What you should be investigating within yourself is whether or not your feelings you had for her were because of her Vs. fantasies you told yourself in your own head.Was she actually speaking and behaving in ways that truly suggested warmth and attraction for you? Or was it that you took the mental image of her and expanded upon that yourself in your head and caught feelings for her? You will most likely find out that it was the former. And the reason I can confidently tell you that is because if you pay attention to reality, she couldn't have possibly been the girl you obsessed over in reality. Because if she were, she'd not have friend zoned you and she would be your girlfriend by now. Maybe she is not the girl you wished for her to be and never was.
>>34451194The former*Meant to say the latter. This one:>You took the mental I age of her and expanded upon that yourself in your head and caught feelings for her (the mental image of her).Which by the way if you did that's normal and that's just how humans begin their attraction/attracted magnetism to begin with. Everyone does this, myself included, it's called infatuation. Or what normies call a 'crush' which you already are aware of. However the critical thinking part of yourself needs to kick in and assess whether or not it's based on real reciprocating efforts from the other side or if it's from your own daydreams. And the minute you figure out it's from daydreams, you can put it out of your mind as something that does not matter. You can objectively tell yourself she never liked you like that. And it wasn't even because of you or any notion of not being good enough, it was just your mind hitting a wall. Sometimes women can be dumb and lead men on, which is why women need to check what signals they're putting out. A lot of them don't even know lol
>>34449584The way to get over a crush or make it less intense and painful is to spend time with people. Even your family counts. Worked for me.
>>34449584find a new jobfuck 3 other womenet voilà! your oneitis is cured
>>34451199From hindsight, I definitely hallucinated a part of it due to inexperience and FOMO (she was the first girl I talked to in 5 years). I think I massively overestimated the fact that she started talking to me, because in my world, there's only one reason to talk to the opposite gender, so I was operating under the assumption that she was into me from the beginning. Then, as I escalated, she never pulled back and even reinitiated when I did (I thought I fucked up several times), so I was convinced it was a slam dunk. And then she hit me with "I have a boyfriend" and "I only see you as a friend", which left me flabbergasted.
>>34451244Unfortunately, I have no one in my life. Creating a physical distance and not seeing her all day has helped a little. Instead of feeling like I'm getting stabbed every time I see her, I feel like I have the knife firmly wedged in my heart.
>>34451293>find a new jobThis is the most braindead job I could find, and I loved it because it let me think about whatever I wanted. Now it means thinking about her for hours on end, but I'm not leaving because of that. She's a foreign worker and will go back home sooner or later.>fuck 3 other womenI talked to another girl after her, and it was just replacing one obsession with another. I'd much rather go back to not thinking about women at all.
Here I am, in my self-imposed exile, at the farthest edge of the company property. I've been sitting here in the cold for half an hour to avoid seeing her briefly walk past me to clock in.
