I'm studying engineering but my life's dream is to be a writer. It's a "gay" dream but I don't really care about anything else, I truly want it. I've been a burden to my parents my whole life and even now at 23 I still am. I’m a terrible student, lazy, I don’t turn in assignments, I don’t study and I fail classes. At 23! At 23 there are guys who already have stable jobs and are buying cars but I’m still playing on Discord with my loser friends who have already graduated and tell me how horrible working is. (It’s not even an interesting engineering degree, it’s like the "engineering for idiots" focused on business administration and stuff like that).So I’m at a crossroads. If I stay in college I’ll graduate and find a job and maybe the exhaustion and total loss of dignity that comes with working in a factory office will dilute any dream or artistic fire I have. Or I could drop out, find some shitty job that’s just enough to keep my mom from kicking me out and spend all my non-working hours writing, betting on the chance that I might have talent and write something good.I write all the time anyway but I feel like if I didn't have to worry about university I’d feel freer. With a shitty job you don't do anything but show up. That’s why it seems like a good option. But then again at the end of the day I could also stay in school, keep writing and then find that same mindless job later so I still have the energy to write.Maybe there are some writer anons who can give me some advice, and if not, judge what the best decision would be based on the fact that my goal is to be a writer. Maybe the plan of keeping up with my studies while I write sounds strange, but it’s basically a sort of plan b so that if writing doesn't work out and I have to work my whole life, I’ll have a degree that helps me get a few more shekels.
>>34462901Why do you need to have a shitty job to spend your non-working hours writing?
>>34462901>I'm 23 is my life over??I'm 30 and I'm still fucking lost. You could, and will get fucking worse, if you keep this shit going.Get a semester off. Try to reach whatever publisher or writing job you want to be working as. If you manage to land a job with them stick with it. If you don't forget about your retarded dream. It will save you time so you won't have 6 years of time wasting to realize you don't have talent for shit.Besides, stuff like art come best to people who don't suffer and you reek of suffering right now. Build a life where you don't suffer first, and write once you have it. Self-sacrifice is only bullshit for the books.
>>34462901Dostoevski was an engineer. So were Robert Heinlein, Andy Weir, Arthur C Clarke, and dozens of others. Meanwhile, unless your name is Rowling or King, do not imagine you will earn a living as a writer. Today ALL writers have day jobs
>>34462901I also wanted to be a writer or mathematician, but thought I'd do it in better life. So now I'm 37 year old design engineer, currently in aerospace/defense OEM, have around 10 years of experience, half of that in automotive, both in technical department and toolshop. I feel like I hit the wall. Don't know what to do or go from there. Just everything seems unsatisfactory and it sucks.
>>34466915>So now I'm 37 year old design engineerYou're a design engineer 40 hours a week. Why aren't you writing during the rest of the time?
>>34462901you're basically going to do what you want, so if you fail then you were meant to be a failure.https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Af-k9sTAYEQ&pp=0gcJCdQKAYcqIYzv
You can write as a hobby. Worry about your finances first.
>>34462901Engineering should be your focus for living, and writing should be something you do on the side. If the writing works out, great! If it doesn't, you still have a steady line of work.Remember, you can take that leap of faith, but pack a parachute.
>>34466933I lived too much for my family. It's kinda different when you have (relatively young) children and wife, time compresses. I don't even remember when I had physical book that wasn't childrens'. Maybe it's all excuses and I am simply neglecting myself (ans my health), but it's also true that I'm probably much more boring and NPC like now. Don't think I have any bright ideas or can speak in a way that captivates minds or simply results in self-cleansing.
>>34462901What you should do is trip balls on sum like DMT. It will show you the way brother
>>34462901Ok so you dream of being a writer, but have you actually completed anything? Like fully finished a short story or novella? Maybe focus on that first, before making any big decisions like dropping out.
>>34462901Engineers write all the time. Just finish school, even if you have to restart from the last checkpoint. Your brains are still in the programming phase. Engineers and philosophers know how to think. The best writers know stuff. Engineers are some of the most likely people to start businesses or otherwise work for themselves. If it ain’t no fun, you could be an overqualified anything else.
