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23F, in BC, Canada. I'm pretty sure my situation (and parents' patience) is wearing real thin. Basically it's a combination of "I'm screwed" and "It's my own fault".
Seriously I swear to god there must be something wrong with me, since my situation, opportunities, privilege, and 'support' have been given to me and all I did was take it for granted, not taken it seriously, and squandered it. (As an only child)
Am I hopeless? How can this even be salvaged?
(1/2)
>>
>>34475757
(2/2)
(My situation + self)
-Graduated Highschool ~4 years ago. Coasted through it, no "real study skills", never had any 'future goals' then, and still not much even now.
-Same year, enrolled at a technical college, doing a diploma and certificate, taking too long to complete. ~4 years+ now. Failed some courses due to lack of discipline/work ethic.
-"OK"-ish in subjects overall, ~D-C (rare B-A) student. Struggled heavily in Math (Workplace 12 is what I took, not sure on Foundations. But (Pre-Calculus 11-12 is out of the question, since I lack skills and knowledge to attempt it)
-However, my 'intelligence' (that I know of) is questionable at best (Can't focus long, can't 'make' myself learn, I've tried ADHD meds but they didn't do anything). "Physical"/hands on tasks (e.g. certifications, forklift, etc) I find are quite simple and east for me to do
-bad body + eating habits (overweight/visceral, and eating junkfoods near-daily, I'm pretty sure it started in childhood, but ramped up in Middle/High-school ). Probably 'convenience', impulse, stress buying. Only "excersise" I do are walking and biking
-I've had a fair amount of savings in the past years, (~$14,000-ish), but again, after high school I WASTED ALL OF IT ON TAKEOUT/STRESS-EATING AND RANDOM TRASH!!!! My current ""savings"" are near 0!! (My parents would kill me if they found out, and all this is my fault, I know)
-1-2 'close friends', don't talk to them much. Quite isolationist. My "days" currently don't have structure, I 'waste time' browsing the web/YouTube until late noon
-Still living with parents, I have to move out and make my life, I and my parents know this too
-I'm too lax in finding a job, maybe I'm not trying hard enough, or even at all + nothing's coming up
up.
-I'm too "lax" in nearly everything in life!! (I don't have a fire or drive or whatever, even in "stress")
>>
holy shit is that me? i am exactly like you except i am a regular gym goer and much younger, i am jacked but depressed, lately i limited my internet usage to 6 hours, my mind is much clearer now and i can focus on whats important much better
>>
what the fuck are you asking advice for here?

REMEMBER:
>/adv/ rule 3
>All threads are expected to be constructive in nature; BAWWWing and venting is discouraged.
>>
>>34475757
It's just really hard to get your life together in Canada right now and it must be hyper-competitive. A lot of people make mistakes. Keep trying. I've wasted enormous amounts of money on stupid shit too. Seems like other anons can relate.
>>
>>34475757
>>34478618
As far as I understood, she wants to know how to develop the proper drive and/or work ethic to prevent her life from failing apart altogether. OP seems to be a former 'gifted kid' that is struggling to find direction in life and start to navigate adulthood due to many maladaptive cognitive and behavioural patterns entrenched in the structure of her life that only got worse as time went on. To list a few:
>Guilty - Over lost time, wasted opportunities, fears, disappointed relatives, inability to change and dumb choices that are repeated over and over again.
>Perfectionism (?) - The deep-rooted need to perform to attend expectations, receive validation, achieve redemption for past mistakes. Unfortunately, it often leads to shame, guilty, procrastination, avoidance, self-loathing, anxiety, depression, etc. The list goes on.
>>
>>34478879
As your life gets worse, your mind gets sicker and the more you'll delve into hopelessness, inaction, self-doubt/hate, which in turn will only magnify the problems described before. Kind of a vicious cycle, or maybe a downward spiral. I don't know if OP will agree though.
>>
>>34475758
Suppose you had been highly intelligent and highly motivated, had gone to college and graduated with honors You would be exactly where you are now - 23 and unemployed.



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