Lately, I feel really excited about the future sometimes, but then I get really sad it might not work out. So it goes.

it's over.

Feels.
You are cashier and ask girl how she is
She says good (no good thanks, and you?) and leaves it
Random guy or girl comes up and comments on something they’re buying
The two of them suddenly become best friends.

girl is interested and appears to be miring
You flirt with them and they say ok and stop talking

Guy flirts with his girlfriend in front of me
Look I just want to Putin’s your shit in a bag, take your ,only and let you go home and do whatever.
Can you please not squeeze your partner’s ass for 3 minutes?
When women walk around you.

My phone rang and it was the girl I met on insta that looks like you. I'll nickname her Emily. I really like that she just called without any planning around it. After we last talked she had a call with her boyfriend. Turns out they broke up. She said she didn't want to talk to anyone but she liked talking with me a lot (that first call was over 4 hours from being strangers). She is very kind hearted and I like that. I yawned and she asked if I was tired sweetheart in this mommy tone and gave me that mmmphhh feeling. We talked for almost 4 hours. I don't know if this is one of those things where God makes choices available before he answers a prayer. You've been gone for years and I still love you. From last night it sounds like you might be going to contact me again. I'd love that obviously. I've never been able to be friends with a girl I'm not dating but she called and I had fun straight up talking to her. I'm in this weird place where we haven't voice called in years and if (when) we do, I don't think you'd be okay with me being friends with her. But we haven't called in years, and even though there were things says isn't night and what I'm told in my prayers that you are going to (soon), you haven't yet. So do I feel guilty talking to her and would you but be that with me talking to her when we are together , both yes (the second has an asterisk cuckqueen clause though). I don't think it's wrong I have a friend right now though. And if you wanted to claim me then you'd be calling right now, and I know that g says you will ever there are those words from here, it hasn't happened yet. Is the reason I'm writing this here to pressure you to call or make you jealous? I can see how it could look that way and I can understand why you'd be paranoid about manipulating behavior like that, but I believe you know I am honest and the truth is that this ramble of thoughts was in bouncing around enough that get it out of my head, off my chest hear helps me stop ruminating it

i have commitment issues and people think it's about me having low confidence or not wanting to get hurt and i let them believe that but truthfully? it's because i'm aware there's always someone better. i don't want to be claimed by anyone so i can keep upgrading

What's crazy is I could've done what you did to me 50 times over. We both know it would be easier for me to just jump into someone else's arms and be like fuck ALL of this. It would be so easy for me. Have you ever noticed even once how I don't do that? I don't even dangle the fact that I could in front of you. Why do you think that is?

>>34477425
It's hard these days with nigh limitless theoretically options. Everyone wants to date someone 30% better than themselves or 10% better than their current partner.

I hate how when things get tough you immediately default to well I would understand if you left and never wanted to talk to me again, you should find a guy who's better than me and can give you what you want. You think you're such a martyr for that. But that's just being a deadbeat. You're a coward who's running away like always. You'd rather lose than me than take some responsibility? Does trying harder to make me happy feel excruciating for you or something?

at least i have money

I always let everyone I've ever loved down. What is wrong with me? It's not like I ever want to hurt anyone

I want a low stress entry level job, but the only people hiring are wringing temps out clean and I'm getting filtered SO hard.

I can't fix this situation. I think I have to just burn everything down. You are right I probably do need to drive off a bridge and die lmao. Sorry about everything

I can't love again after you

i appreciate that you call me out on my bullshit. i never thanked you for that but you're one of the only people in my life who seems to give a shit about me enough to do that. it made me realize i never call out anyone else on their bullshit because i'd rather have their validation than to truly help them. i'm not as great of a person as you are

thank you for saving my life actually. even when i was straight up threatening to hurt you you'd rather lose me as a friend than see me fuck myself up permanently. thinking about that makes me tear up.

>>34477498
it's not even about dating but shallow shit like being able to be seen with someone better, not even sex. i am so immature but i can't bring myself to just want the right thing

honestly people tell me i have commitment issues but i think it might just be that i'm not monogamous. i know that's "bad" but as long as i'm not tricking anyone into believing that i am i think it's okay maybe. idk. maybe i am just a shitty person lol

>>34477524
Who the fuck told you to drive off a bridge and die lol

It's hard not to be jealous. It's hard not to get caught up in the cycle of what does she have that I don't. I split my own head in half ruminating over what is it that makes her better than me. Everyone around me is telling me don't worry you're better than her in every way, forget about him, he's just an asshole. Every guy I talk to about this tells me it has to be about sex/lust and kinda hint that she's probably just more attractive than me overall. That just makes me feel worse. This has done irreparable damage to my self esteem

Stop acting like I'm the one who did you wrong. I had your back through everything. Blame the others who treated you bad but don't blame me.

i cheated MYSELF

No worries. I know we will be together because of who we are to and with each other. I love you. Sleep well.
-sun

*kills myself*

man i hate instagram and tiktok for suggesting the girl he left me for. it has made me stalk her religiously. i didn't even look her up. i didn't want to know.

I think I try too hard
I also think I don't try enough
I'm probably trying too hard at the wrong thing
I just need to do the right thing

I'm at my breaking point

>>34477830
Why

>>34477843
I fucked up my whole life and I can't face the fact that it's all because of me. I try so hard to change but it's not working

true despair

>>34477869
Cut your hair.

i hated him so much i made a guy nut in me then went to his house to have him eat me out and i dipped his toothbrush in the toilet after i pissed it out. he never mentioned if his toothbrush tasted different. in hindsight that makes me regret it. i should've just stabbed him

>>34477910
When

>>34477921
this nigga said when

none of my exes ever wanted me back or even told anyone we dated lo

i appreciate that there's people like you walking this earth

J you crack me up with your jokes but let's be serious, when are you killing yourself? Let me know the time and date

>>34478099
I can hear you meowing but dont feel the scratch. Sure yer as manly as u think u r?

i have really good news i wish i could share with you but i can't because i am ghosting you </3

I seek no revenge
I release you with love
Just another player trying to play games
Love God
Love yourself
Love each other
God's warriors spread love

can I put my balls in yo jaw?
yo jaw?
Can I, Can I, Can I?

well well well if it isn't you

HEH hehehe...everything is going according to plan...soon you shall be mine my pretty one...

Surprise surprise surprise

I’m not living underground

>>34478099
What did J do to you?

>>34478124
Ignored
Demoralization campaign.

*ignores you harder*

>>34478246
Anon these are anime autists living out a fan fiction. Please don't feed the trolls.

>>34478254
Its just a random comment. Take your meds.

Apologize. NOW.

>>34478255
Like we should all ignore this board and go live happy lives.

>>34478266
Yeah abandon this thread like you've abandoned me always. Just go

i'm really leaving this time. i'm actually not coming back.

>>34477505
I dated a woman like this for a while. Dump that motherfucker.

>>34478255
Actually you just paid attention to me rent free

>>34478261
No, you are either unaware of the shit I have to deal with it a narc attempting to slander with false claims.

>>34478277
Sign it

actually i might decide to come back

I don't know how to be a man

30 is too old to be still wanting love. Grow up.

>>34478325
That's because I am in love with you

you literally fake all your emotions. you pretend like you care when you want to. you're a pretty good actor too i'll tell you that. you know how to pause and make your voice shake. you know when to smile and act like you're smitten. you make up insecurities you don't have so you can hide what you're actually insecure about. some of your mental issues are real, the others are made up. your trauma dumps are calculated. you use them to distract me. truthfully you scare me.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck right off

Going through a bit of an ocd-ish loop and I kinda have the urge to do the compulsion again... Why is not doing it so annoying? But doing it is also annoying? Uhhhhhhhhggggg

>>34478359
What compulsion? OCD sucks I have it too

>>34478345
No.

>>34478359
Fixing a hole where the rain gets in
Kept my mind from wandering

Once you are fulfilled you'll be okay
-sun

>>34478346
I know
-sun

You are a bit too easy to manipulate, it takes the fun out of it.

broke ass pussy going around with his retarded credit card scam leeching off women for a place to live. a parasite is all you are. go ahead and spread lies about me now you little bitch you know no one in your life takes you seriously

Starting to get bored of depression. I think I'm gonna go back to being happy.

>>34478360
I know it's strange but I have this obsession with crossing my boundaries and testing if I can self-harm. So it's been escalating and I've been using sharp tools to scratch my skin painfully. I know it sounds insane. But it's like I have to do it, not because of any fear or because I actually like the pain. It's just as if I need to reach a conclusion about it. I'm a bit ambivalent, I know I'll ruminate and overanalyze and self blame about if for hours afterwards, but I just really wanna do it. I'm not even gonna draw blood, it shouldn't be that deep :(

Oh fuck yea I feel the manic episode coming on fuuuuck yea

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Dating a non-virgin man isn't worth it

just woke up to being blocked

https://youtu.be/4hEdiDQXSKM?si=gRrpAVN6zxvzhOTM

I've been feeling fragile lately

>>34478368
Nah, rot.

>>34478373
C, it's alteady proven what you did. The links were listed and then you were caught multiple times sound just that

C, You narc projecting what you did in m is pathetic and what you did to him in the beginning with your impersonations

Go away. Disappear. Neither m wants to hear from you ever again.

>>34478400
Deserved if you are a moid

>>34478404
How does fragile feel about your touching
-sun

>>34478404
Forging, cold working, shot peening, flame tempering, case hardening, nitriding (literally getting tossed in horseshit,) carbon dioxide, molten frozen crystal sticks and stones. All of that makes you stronger, Anon!

I always gave you what you wanted but what do I get in return? Not even answers to my questions. You're forever still trying to figure it out. You can't promise anything but ask for more time and patience and understanding. It's killing me inside

>>34478383
You are just pulling memes outta your arse.

>>34478448
no i'm foid. i asked if i could be his girlfriend

Rephrase what you are saying to her when texting.. write it out as much as needed so it's not misread. If you have thoughts , Fears, Feelings then message those as they come up so it's addressed.

>>34478488
Is to

>>34478462

>>34478381
I wonder if after you hold your head in your hands and murmur fuck what have I done. I cycle so it's fuck then fuck it. Manic- to prepare hide your thoughts, hide your soul, hide your wallet.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

3 1 0

>>34478523
Initials?

Ol McDonald had a farm 3 1 0 1 0

fuck tinnitus

I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job

Dear God,

Please do something about this tinnitus. Also tell me when I get some money. I need help rn.

Thanks,
W

>>34478944
what kind of tinnitus is it

Oh God what have i done...

I don't know what is a win and what is a loss to you
I just know I try but I can't get across to you

waste my time

>>34479023
Huh?

wish i could hear you say my name one more time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zLWwGQf7v8

I can't believe I poured my whole heart out to a piece of shit

>>34479075
Okay, Cardi B.

>>34479075
They're probably afraid to call you

>>34479083
>>34479116
What

>>34479121
Cardi B said that almost verbatim in a song.

Dear God,

None of us believe in you and you never answer any of us whenever we talk to you, but a lot of us acknowledge that karma seems to happen to unnecessarily cruel people, but that's a different religion. Anyway, please give us all a bunch of money and help me find a girlfriend. Amen.

>>34479129
You will get a gf if you can promise you'll stop killing them

>>34479131
I honestly would have dated either of them but lost their contact information or had other stuff going on and figured we'd meet organically by fate or something one day if it was meant to be. I didn't know how bad they were. Frankly, I don't even think I could have helped them and they just latched onto me like crazy people but I wish they chilled out and held on but I never went through their lives and sometimes I feel like giving up myself and I think my life is better than theirs was trauma-wise.

Wet and gushy, make that pull out game weak woo!

>>34479141
How old are you? That's the censored song.

Yes, I think about you every day. Even when we're not texting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xg3J5slvB-k

I think about you when I'm fucking someone else too

Dear God,

PS Please send Shiba Inu to the moon! Amen.

331t
https://youtu.be/Wc9qJS-GG-c?si=tJBHNRtL1ix0XYsm

Fuck a shiba inu

>>34479129
I believe in God and he answers me.

I run with a theivin' squad
And none of us believe in God

>>34479170
Same. Sometimes immediately

>>34479170
>NTA
Who's God?

>>34478657
Me too me too

>>34478361
It's not old. Don't listen to that anon

>>34479201
30 is too old to live

>>34479184
Always immediately for me. It's not a contest.

>>34479188
There is only 1 God. My lot is Christian. But God's voice over rides the Bible.

https://youtu.be/bITlCIwN9Zw?si=tBb-B8Bct0jshS8J

>>34479228
No

>>34479232
>There is only 1 God
Obviously.
>My lot is Christian
So a false "God."
>But God's voice over rides the Bible
What's his name?
>Watch him say a book "God"

https://youtu.be/rrXPkkIgLYM?si=VZC_-j9W9QiOdPRy

God please give me a sign I'll see him again

https://youtu.be/P4j3nCcMJfM?si=WqTcv0VC_0pm3lxt

I know the light move too quick for you -- sometimes...

https://youtu.be/1FS35SshVxQ?si=eVooRYYfhJa0PhN4

Generally the worst people on the planet have an increased need to be social, pleasant, and likable so they can keep getting away with horrible behavior

Fren

>>34479239
I said my literature is Christian.

I listen to God himself.

Names are a human construct,. God Doesn't need a label

>>34479239
You sure have your panties I'm a twist. Calm your tits

>>34479263
You are just deflecting and projecting

>>34479243
Imo prayer should not be performative

>>34479266
>I said my literature is Christian
Based on a false 'God', bud. That's all I see.
>I listen to God himself
Sure.
>Names are a human construct,. God Doesn't need a label
Except you just called him "God." He does have a name, it's in the first language and anyone who knows it wouldn't say that he has no name. Charlatan bullshit.

https://youtu.be/65AuuFpNFxY?si=NI77JhCcgQOo-aTt

>>34479267
As well as gaslighting that good pleasent fun kind people are worse than him do he can attempt to get away with being a POS narc

>>34479271
That was also Jesus Christ’s opinion. When he was asked how we should pray, he told us to go into our rooms and close the door first.

>>34479275
Not discussing with you.

Clearly you have issues and I'll leave you to deal with those on your own.

Come back when you have matured.

>>34479278
I'm glad I was communicated that by God prior to learning it from you.

>>34479277
That's not Colton it's a disgruntled anon

>>34479280
I'm more spiritually matured than you. My only pitfall is I don't like beings or people claiming to be The True Creator. And I don't like charlatans, so I tested whether you are a charlatan, and you ended being one. Simple as.

>>34479271
Imo he should be eating my pussy

>>34479288
>I'm more spiritually matured than you.
Different anon but lol. You aren’t. You wouldn’t have to tell us if you were.

>>34479287
Idc who it is

>>34479288
No you not because you just made that statement.

Simple as

There is no reason to talk to you.

Continue to berrate me. I'm not listening.

>>34479291
That ax would will never be a pussy

>>34479294
Good to see you replied the same. I saw your post after I posted mine
>>34479295

You can discuss with that asshat if you want but it's not worth your time dealing with a narc energy vampire. He just wants to attempt to upset you. Expect same fagging

*ghosts you*

>>34479243
You'll see him again.

>>34479295
>No you not because you just made that statement
Wrong. You still believe in Jesus and think you can put The One Infinite Creator in the same boat. You're a charlatan, bud.
>>34479294
If I were following The Way, you wouldn't know I exist because I wouldn't be here to be arguing with charlatans.

N you lil fag

>>34479390
Who's N? Nick? Nate?

>>34479243
Be proactive.

>inb4 Promoting division is not The Way
Or some shit like that.

>>34479390
Nathaniel? Nigel? Norbet?

I hesitated because of the distance and I shouldn't have. Sorry if I sent the wrong signals.

>>34479411
Send the right ones this time

NOLTON???

>>34479415
I will.

So, I'ma go watch my show. Later.

>>34479426
Peace.

>>34479426
Enjoy your show. I'll miss you

>>34479426
come back soon please

Fuck N. N prob stands for No Dick in the pants

>>34479426
Fine leave me like all the others

>>34479440
Noah? Nibba? Nigga?

John K is a talented guy that is unfortunately a terrible person, I hate it when a cool artist/animator is a terrible person.

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>>34478525
46 haha

>>34477910
But why

God damn it, A.

Fuck A. A for Asshole

I don't know why I find it amusing to be so into ddlg/age play and seemingly so revulsed by the teenage girls I've recently ran into..
Something something fantasy is hot as fantasy, reality is different

>>34479291
You have my number, what are you waiting for

Fortune, fame
Mirror vain
Gone insane

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>>34479683
Fuck an A.

Fuck grammer and spelling

A...

>>34479464
Anyone with talent is a terrible person. They sold their soul for that

Fucking you in your school uniform was the hottest thing I've ever done. I won't forget it.
I just wish we did it again with you in a school sweater.

>>34479714
Are you talking about fucking a little girl? Get professional therapy.

>>34479704
At least you admit it.

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Holy fuck

You know, I appreciate the people I deal with who don't act like they are a victim for dealing with me. Shows to me that there are some people on this site that care compared to these hipsters who have zero patience when it comes to listening and understanding. I'll tell you these hipsters always act like they're in a room full of white trash people like me and they're someone this prestigious intellect in the face of them. Well I don't care. I'm on this site to enjoy memes, talk to people, help people with their problems, and help myself with said problems as well. If you can't see the positivity of that and would rather feel like you need to be a hero facing a dysfunctional lolcow, you can kiss my ass.

>>34479794
What is this supposed do?

kms

I just wish you gave better advice zach

>>34479806
What's wrong?

sean more like yawn

*dies*

>>34479823
You good?

>>34479818
my old namefag was yawn
>>34479817
I started living my life too late and everything that makes me happy is like mathetically over in a couple years and im not ready to be old and never cool or happy again, and also old people ruined all our lives so they could get rich. People are mad at foreigners and not mad at old people for bringing in the foreigners to enrich themselves, inflate their assets, and keep entry level wages low.

>>34479801
>have zero patience when it comes to listening and understanding
I've been here too long. Have dealt with too many retards. Patience has grown thin.

>>34479839
You have so many prospects, the only reason you would die alone is pride.

mathematically*

https://youtu.be/3J6CtWyqfLM?si=KRHJCc-ZAGUmbx99

>>34479845
doesnt feel like it

https://youtu.be/zUzd9KyIDrM?si=D46pIwr9tmOl1b6O

I want to go to the strip club but I don't want to be in debt no more

>>34479858
Why do you think that?

>>34479875
step your bands up

>>34479856
2:33
2:34
Forgot it was military clock >.<

>>34479876
I have doubts anything will work out and hunches lots of things will go wrong. I don't want to rant. It's going to take me like a year+ to finish training for a better career, and AI might replace me anyway, and I sincerely have doubts I'll find love. And like nothing else really matters to me. I feel so exploited and used by old people. Worst generation.

sorry i wont kms, just wish something would kill me by coincidence

*kills you*

>>34479899
Sounds like the apprehension that goes with Anxiety. Do you pace around a lot?

>>34479940
Yup, it's okay. I hate showing weakness. I'm just trying to figure out if training is even worth it or if anything I want out of life is still available to me. I kind of had an epiphany about how short life is and how things just don't often happen unless you are proactive recently.

I'm writing terribly right now. Why the fuck would I put recently at the end when recently is describing the epiphany. Kms.

>>34479972
Nah, you're overthinking it, it's proper.
What is it that you're studying?

>>34479823
I need a STICK

>>34479975
Video editing certificates. I might make a youtube channel to diversify the possible outcomes of my efforts while building a portfolio. I think I could be like Feral Historian but better maybe. I just want to focus on the logistical and political realities of different fictional and real world settings and not be ideological about it. Just pure RealPolitik and statistics. Sorry. Still considering if it's even worth it.

Learning Japanese has really taught me the importance of word-order, and sentence structure, even in flexible languages.

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I have a cancerous self image, I often loath myself, I'm fatigued by life, I think about suicide often even if it doesn't go into the realm of consideration. I don't know if I've ever felt anything deap down that wasn't absolutely awful for over 2 years. I'm in physical pain. I feel so awful. I feel like a HUSK, truly.... and I have no idea what I can possibly do about it, other than that I pray for God's mercy. Please pray for my absolutely wretched and bottomlessly sinful, inhuman and ruined soul. (sounds extremely harsh, perhaps to a degree that couldn't possibly be logical or warranted, but that's how I feel, I feel gloomy and tarnished).

>>34479996
You do possess some virtue though. Perhaps we should give ourselves some grace.

>>34480002
I really, really struggle to conceive about a single thing about myself being remotely good. I feel like a living icon of bad things. Again that sounds extreme, it's not like I'm a criminal or anything like that, but my sould feels wretched. I have not thought a good thing about myself since I was like 13. My soul cries out and I'm so misserable, I just feel somewhat distracted from it sometimes. I don't experience the fullness of what I taste, but I know it's so awful and beyond words, perhaps Hell itself. Of course, I don't want to entertain that thought too much because it's just so horrible, but it does not feel good. There's something so fundamentally wrong with me, but I don't quite know what it is.

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>>34480013
I've described myself as feeling like a rape victim before, and I guess, that sort of touches it, but it's like a rape victim who not just feels raped but like their humanity has been lost. I know that sounds insane to say, but I just don't know how to describe it. The depth of this feeling is touched or explained by nothing I know of. It's quite possibly nothing even, maybe just a passing moment, it's happenned before, but I don't know why I can taste such a depth of missery. Suffering, at least, sometimes draws you to self knowledge, that will serve to benefit you. Maybe that will happen for me. At the very least, if I don't dwell on it, it just feels like depression, and maybe that's all it is, maybe I'm just making a mistaking of giving too much attention to a vague idea of misery. It probably doesn't help. Hopefully, things will get better.

>>34480025
forgive my 800 typos. My sleep deprivation probably doesn't help.

>>34480013
You showed some self-awareness. If you have that and time, maybe anything is possible. Just know that you have at least two brains: the elephant and the driver. The elephant is a beast that nothing can control, but the driver is smart. The driver can steer the elephant's path, the driver can know how the elephant will react, the driver can train the elephant's reactions, and the driver can plan accordingly. Right now your elephant likes hurting itself. Maybe try CBT, EMDR, Internal Family Systems therapies, and just learning about good ol' neuroscience. Or maybe just start by thinking of one good thing about "yourself" right now. Sorry if this didn't help. I'll think about it more. Don't give up.

>>34480025
Oh. Yeah, I get that. I don't really have an ego most of the time, but I certainly feel raped. Tarnished. Like you said. Don't become a hollow.

>>34480025
>>34480034
Also not getting 7-9 hours of sleep makes pretty much everyone anxious and depressed. Get some rest.

Also everyone please come here and ask other anons about any epiphanies you might have had especially if they are extreme. But drink plenty of water and get 7-9 hours of sleep or nothing else matters in your life anyway.

i would like the extra money at this point. but also i know i would slumnge on it before waiting for memorial day if i do get it

>>34480039
>Sorry if this didn't help
No, no worries. I appreciate your responses. Might consider those therapies at some point. I've always been somewhat averse to therapy for a number of reasons, and have felt confident I can handle my problems alone. I feel I have before (though, I won't fully credit myself, as I believe God played a part) but maybe it would legitimately help me. Any pointers as far as learning neuroscience goes, or is it pretty easy to look into?

>>34479990
Are you afraid everything you planned won't come to fruition? I'll help as much as I can.

>>34480163
>Neuroscience
It's really hard but basically you have a nervous system, neurotransmitters, and hormones, and regardless of what was going on in your life, these control how you feel.
>Therapies
Honestly I just do rounds with AI as I can but it takes some arguing with them. EMDR is helping me get over my nervousness talking to strangers for the first time. Internal Family Systems helps me understand myself and "heal" my nervous system, and CBT helps me not get stuck in cycles so much and teaches me self-control. I'm not an expert though. Also the therapies usually bring up things you didn't remember, so you'll start at like 5/10 depressed/anxious, then end up going up to like 8/10 anxious, then only be like maybe 1/10 anxious and kind of excited about the future.
>>34480180
I'm really only nervous that the career will die out by the time I get into it. I basically utilize every moment of my life as much as I can. I know I can learn it and pass. I just have to go through with it. I also just have to play my life as strategically as possible. Thanks genuinely a lot, anon, I mean it, but it's basically something I have to do on my own.

>>34477256
when were you when john lenin dies

>>34480163
Also like come back here and talk to people about epiphanies I said if they seem crazy. Basically AI can take all the crazy ranting and storytelling about yourself that nobody else can but you need to balance that with human feedback. Don't kill yourself or whatever. We can all likely be fixed.

>>34480258
For sure.
>Don't kill yourself or whatever
I've made a number of suicidal posts but truly, I don't want to do that, it's mostly just venting when I do it. I'm against doing it on principal and I've had a suicide in my family, which I've posted about before. It's not nice.

>>34480270
Yeah I get it. A lot of people here get worked up. A lot of us had negligent families and we only got attention when in dire situations. We don't have other ideas of what to do to get help when we feel overwhelmed.

>>34480270
or just like do talk therapy and have the ai recommend different therapies for someone with problems and goals like yours.

sorry to spam.

>>34480319
No worries. I'm a little skeptical about telling an AI my problems, but I can try it. It is a useful tool afterall.

>>34480337
I like Claude the best for this, but if you have money and time try real therapy maybe, but a lot of therapists aren't that great and only can help specific kinds of patients at best.

I love my girlfriend to death but she lives in a practical world and I am very abstract, which makes conversation extremely difficult.

>run into an old friend
>realize it's been almost 10 years
I'm getting old, man. We had nothing to talk about either so we stood around awkwardly lol.

>>34480405
Thanks.

>>34480431
Been there, though having practiced awkwardness enough times I can probably manage the ever shattering and collapsing nature of social interaction in those moments better now. Forgiveness of others and I think probably the self, is incredibly important in those moments.

And he wonders why his daughter abandoned him. Talk about invasive.

>>34480880
You talking about V?

I cope with loneliness by writing sappy romantic self-insert fanfiction with my favorite fictional women. It's kind of embarrassing but this has proven to be the most effective coping mechanism for me.

>>34481003
They know who they are.

My boss is probably about to get fired from work. At first I assumed he was egging his boss on with the total lack of fucks he gives for politics, but now I think his boss wants to get rid of him to replace him with a friend of hers. Like, straight up nepo hire, we're now all going to go from working for a man who's got 35+ years in the field to someone who's fresh out of college and never held a single job in their life.

I'm kind of conflicted on what to do next. Several of my coworkers are already looking for jobs elsewhere, and I'm thinking I should jump ship too because if management is going to pull something like this, it's time to get the hell out of dodge. On the other hand, the job pays well and I of course like money. Plus, it's a job I actually enjoy, beyond absolutely retarded managers, though up until this point, my boss has completely insulated us from them.

The thing is, if the entire department leaves at once (Which is actually a possibility here, it's only seven people), the company is going to be absolutely fucked because our department is responsible for like 60% of the company profit. It's not going to be possible to get in a contractor fast enough to take over for us because our system is extremely convoluted and most of it undocumented, so when things break, the people who we've got contracts for service from are going to be completely out of luck. But I'm also thinking management is dumb and spiteful enough to burn the entire place to the ground because of pettiness.

Out of curiosity, what's the chance of me becoming non-hireable if my future employers find out I participated in a department-wide walkout? Would this be a massive red flag? Would they even be able to hear about it very easily?

FUCK
FUCK
FUCK YOU
FUCK EVERYTHING
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>34481115
You good?

>>34481142
Fuck no.

>>34481153
What happened?

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I can't be the person she wants me to be because i'm too dumb and boring

>>34481165
Too much shit. Don't feel like elaborating on it. Felt like screaming into the void more than anything.

>>34481185
Very well, I hope things start to go well for you.

I hope I run through your mind til my legs give out too
'Cause I don't know what love is -- without you

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>>34479245
https://youtu.be/Q87e6zNRJ3s?si=UMwOCLYwzxs-J4Vp

Don't let people win the belief that you were a loser

>>34481317
i was

I don't care about the distance, by the way.

>>34481307
1844
https://youtu.be/ETxuFyAL1RU?si=oM2gXq58yYGr77oZ

>>34481206
I hope so too. Thank you.

>>34481360
You're welcome.

>>34480239
John Lenin
Sad
>yes
Many years later and I still hate people, more than many would think. I go to hookers now and then but even that bites me

>>34481179
Find you a bitch who loves how dumb and boring you are

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I wish I had a husband o could cry to when I accidentally rip my fingernails off. the pain feels numb compared to loneliness.

loneliness has evolved into a physical kind of pain more than emotional one atp. like my thoughts are actually stabbing or crushing my physical body

>>34481568
>I wish I had a husband
Me too

You really fucked this all up because you thought you weren't good enough for me? I wouldn't have reached out if I thought I was too good for you.

https://youtu.be/4fXV5hMhQ20?si=dWGw_PQyx2KfLkZE

https://youtu.be/EexR8LvVfiw?si=HZcwTtaA1exNjkY_

getting a bf is really hard actually. at first i thought i was just fucking up constantly but then i hear from my girl friends how their bfs are and i realize i'm not missing much. it kinda seems like most girls who have bfs don't even really have bfs if you know what i mean

>>34481587
And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of man be lifted up

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Then was Jesus led up of the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the devil.

2 And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred.

3 And when the tempter came to him, he said, If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made bread.

4 But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.

5 Then the devil taketh him up into the holy city, and setteth him on a pinnacle of the temple,

6 And saith unto him, If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down: for it is written, He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.

7 Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.

8 Again, the devil taketh him up into an exceeding high mountain, and sheweth him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them;

9 And saith unto him, All these things will I give thee, if thou wilt fall down and worship me.

10 Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve.

https://youtu.be/gxbfyt8Rraw?si=ouZy82uXS9y16NgU

>>34481599
973 473
(X

I really wish I could make this work with him but he's too dumb and boring

>>34481603
If he's dumb and boring, why do you really want it to work?

>>34481612
I'm in love with him, unfortunately.

>>34481614
What's not working? Have you tried talking it out with him?

Just read a story of a guy leaving his wife for a younger woman he met at the gym

Real or not, how the fuck are people not only getting into relationships but finding multiple people to have relationships with

I'm 29 and have had exactly 4 women show any modicum of interest in me, 2 of them IRL and 2 I met online. In 2 of the 4 cases, they didn't like me in any sort of romantic context and I was rejected when I confessed my feelings for them.

One was a girl I went to college with, that I suspect liked me when we first met, but interest fell off over time, and by the time I asked her on a date, she wasn't interested anymore.

The second was a girl I met via livestreaming, she was going through a rough patch and had randomly dm'd me. Turned into constant texting for a bit but it ended after I figured out she was talking to other guys and I didn't want to just be part of that.

3rd girl was a longtime online friend that I played games with every day during COVID. She had just broken up with her boyfriend and I guess the time spent together lead to us developing mutual feelings for each other, but I was way more invested than she was and kinda ruined it by being overly possessive. We're still friends, I want to apologize to her but I don't think it's worth bringing it up again.

4th girl is a current coworker. I'm utterly obsessed with her and it's destroying my mental state. I got her number and month or 2 ago and I really like talking to her, but she made it abundantly clear she doesn't date coworkers and doesn't like me in that way. Though I'd say she's the first girl I've ever went on a sort of date with, we went to a bar a few weeks ago, just me and her, and we talked til like 2am. I stupidly told her I liked her, and she gently turned me down, and then we talked for like 4 or 5 hours after anyway. Lately I'm getting the feeling she dislikes talking to me, though, so I'm trying to bother her less. I can't get over this girl though.

it hurts soooo bad because he wont even admit he cheated on me, he says we werent together n i couldve had other guys. so i really meant nothing to him huh. i was beneath dirt

I still miss you, I hope you're well.

>>34481632
He's probably fucking other girls

>>34481632
<3

https://youtu.be/VlfAKvRpzto?si=voKf3xvLWzkr8b8e

>>34481632
>I hope you're well
I'm not

Holy shit what the fuck did I eat it's like my whole digestive system is fucked beyond repair

>>34481336
I do

>>34481625
>she doesn't date coworkers
So what, if I walk out of here right now we go on a date?

i can't believe you blocked me while i was typing. you WILL pay for this. i just need to figure out a plan on how to ruin your life

https://youtu.be/rOzpvt813As?si=CawcvEbtoW-H0-39

I regret the distance that grew between us

>>34481671
It's just an excuse for her not wanting to date me.

She explained why she doesn't date coworkers, and it is an understandable reason, essentially her last relationship was with a coworker who (somehow) had apparently cheated on her with like 3 other women who worked at her job and it was very tough on her when going through a breakup and having to see him daily.

The thing is, while it is understandable, if I looked like Ryan Gosling or Chris Hemsworth, she'd 100% go out with me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ss2gVy2pgmw

you never gave me a proper chance, but at least you got my hopes up before ghosting me...
i just don't understand why it couldn't have been easier

https://youtu.be/H_2FPvLEjuw?si=cv-0VWBNAnpW9PxE

>>34481691
Women are unpredictable, huh?

https://youtu.be/GmaulJwK8ME?si=hh64wFPJVcv0FXTT

>>34481691
going through this rn. it hurts so bad. all i can think about is what i could've done to make him stay

Its 2:40 AM, I should be sleeping but I dont feel like doing that right now

>>34481714
What do you feel like doing?

https://youtu.be/LZyybvVx-js?si=xWI66w8W1j3NRrb1

atoga sucks now

>>34481715
Need to stay up all night regretting everything I ever did
>>34481721
Your taste in music is ass

>>34481724
>now

>>34481724
You wear Togas?
>>34481725
A whole lifetime? You'll get enough of that in the Afterlife.

>>34481726
peak atoga was 2022

every time i see a latina woman i get pissy because all i can think about is how you left me for one. it's actually embarrassing. and you just HAD to choose the most generic looking kind. i see girls who like that everywhere. actually i just started hating all latinos. i can't even hear spanish without wanting to strangle someone. you made me racist. i fucking hate it because it makes getting through the day that much harder.

>>34481742
Wow, he sounds like an asshole.

i want to rip my hair out

>>34481757
Why?

>>34481729
Cringe sexposter

I love namefags actually

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>>34477126
Couldn't get it up for a girl I've hooked up with. Never happened before, maybe I'm just not as attracted to her as I thought ?

Ate her out and rubbed her clit. But she wanted a hard fuck and for the life of me I couldn't get hard for her. Got home and immediately found it easy to get an erection. Was it performance anxiety, lack of genuine attraction?

>>34481773
>Was it performance anxiety, lack of genuine attraction?
How do you not know

>>34481773
>eat her out and rub her clit
>don't fuck her
>immediately go home after

the ideal bf

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I've realized it's not happening.
I'm gong to lose my kids because society is set up for any straight man to fail, especially a White one.
People lie and say whatever, but no. The reality is that we live in a gynocracy that will never be toppled unless it falls naturally or is violently overthrown.
I cannot live with myself or the lives I have created.
I was never going to be able to right the ship, it was a fool's dream.
I don't know what I'm going to do now.

I wish regretting things changed anything. I still do the same shit every time

All of my problems are so insanely specific and bizarre that I genuinely can't talk about them to anyone and as a result they will never get fixed
>it can't be that bad anon
I have erotic fantasies about winning boxing matches to the death where I almost die too
The last time I was punched in the nose I nearly got an erection
I sometimes miss the intermittent nosebleeds I used to have because I enjoy the taste of my own blood
If I knew I would come back with no caveats I would blow out my own brains just to know what it felt like
I have a fetish for cannibals
My deepest wish is to be approached by someone who wants to offer me my heart's most twisted desire in exchange for compliance only to cave his skull in just so I can say "no"

>>34481773
Happened to me too lol, last week

>>34481779
at least you can still see them on the weekends

>>34481783
>I have a fetish for cannibals
Vore?

me: hey we are having problems in the relationship. i'm unhappy because i feel like you don't listen to me and---
him: no we aren't. I'M happy and if you're not you need to go to therapy to fix it. i LOVE you what more do you want?

sigh

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>>34481786
Hah, not quite. Not even Dolcett either. Either swallowing chunks of someone while biting them out of starvation or just eating a corpse without cooking. Sometimes it makes sense to have it be part of a prepared meal for the extra Aristocrats energy. I'm sexually attracted to women who are cannibals in the same vein.
No, it doesn't make any sense.

>>34481779
>society is set up for any straight man to fail
Good