>Be me>Have brother who is a year younger than me>used to be very close and cared for each other>Reach high school>Stopped caring about brother for my own selfish needs>Brother starts hanging out with wrong crowd>Begins smoking weed, having sex, drinking>Things get to a head when my brother and father get into fistfight and I’m the one who called the police, afterwards my family said I did the wrong thing>Ffw 2 years>I finish highschool, about to finish community college >Brother dropped out of high school, all he does is smoke pot and stay in his room.I can’t help but feel responsible for putting him in that situation. I should’ve protected him and led him down a better path, but didn’t do anything. My inaction still haunts me everyday. Pills don’t help, and I’m starting to abuse alcohol and considering roping. Is there any advice anyone can give, even if it is something as simple as “It’s gonna be okay?”
>>34515319Lol ur just jealous he has sex and u don't
>>34515324You’re probably right. I never tried to have any meaningful relationships or friendships, I was always focused on work and school, so I never developed any social skills.
>>34515319Wait -- but /adv/ told me total losers don't have sex. What the-
>>34515337>>34515319is this a bait troll thread or is your brother a hood nigga
>>34515319quit the alcohol and force yourself to find something to do, even walking for 4 hours per day is betteryou can choose what to be responsible for, but try not to beat yourself up, it'll just make your own behavior harder to understand/predict & fuck things up moreyou gotta put on your own oxygen mask first
you don't realize how bad alcohol is, OPyou could end up in a much worse situation than your brother very quickly if you aren't carefulalcohol + isolation + unresolved emotions is a very dangerous combination
>>34515319Hey OP, hope you're okay.I'm a younger brother with a less than stellar family, not broken, but clrarly lacking in some departments. Through the years, my sister has commented on how she has felt responsible/guilty for moving away to study in college and leaving me with my parents, as if she "abandonded" me, which even back then I found to be a bit silly. My parents are troubled and a pain in the ass at their worst, but they're still loving and functional.The reason I comment that is because I feel something similar's happening here. You're taking responsability for something outside of your control. Yes, you could've been there for him, but the truth of the matter is that your brother is your own individual, he chose to do all these things, and he could've very well rejected any and all interventions/advice you could've given him and end up in the same spot, or even worse.It's good you care for your brother, but I find the guilt to be extreme if it leads you to pills and booze. Maybe you could've helped, maybe not, but if your brother ended up in the place he is it'd because of his doing, you didn't send him to an alley to meet bad people and smoke pot in there.You need help, OP. The most you can do is tell your brother you're worried about his future and his life at this point. He himself has to turn his life around, that'd a choice he has to make, just like the ones that led him to drop and stay inside. Good luck, hope everything's okay.
>>34515319What have you done to try to help your brother recently?
>>34515538I’ve been trying to get him to start by going out of the house, even if it is something as mundane as driving me to the store, but he refuses to do anything outside of the house. I’m trying to make up for my mistakes, but every time I try, I somehow fuck up even worse
Have conversations with your brother. Be there for him.I was horrible to my little brother as we got older, and he got harassed relentlessly in high school. He basically got expelled - it was that or do 3 months of classwork on his own. Anyway he killed himself. You do not want your little brother to kill himself, trust me. It kinda ruined my life.
Help urbroU only get 1
>>34516019Have you tried giving your brother a tight huge and saying sorry you were not there for him? Your brother will probably dismiss, brush it off, or say it's not your fault. But... At least he will know you love him.
>>34515319You are not responsible for your brother or your parent's happiness because you can't change their beliefs.You are responsible for your own happiness through the beliefs you accept.You look like a parentified child.Read Toxic parents by Susan Forward.Alcohol won't solve your problems, but facing your past emotions and releasing them while becoming conscious of the toxic family dynamics will help you feel inner peace.
