Bro, come on. Imagine someone else was telling you this. Either you accept that it's over or you force yourselves through a few more months of pointless suffering just to end it in an even worse way.

>>34520766
Dump her, she's a liability on your soul. She's not attracted to you. If she was she'd accept your quirks and life choices. The non exclusivity request confirms this. Once you've seen true attraction it's impossible to accept anything else.

>>34520766
Even broaching the topic is an instant end to the relationship.

Choose now. I recommend ending it immediately.

>>34520766
I don't understand.
Why have you not fucked her in the last 5 months?

>>34520798
Why would she cry though? She was in tears for minutes at a time and I was just awkwardly sitting there listening to her vent. I'd have thought she'd just unceremoniously ghost me or break up via text or something if she really didn't give a shit
>>34520835
We both work full time and I can usually only see her once per week and it's usually on a week night after work so I'll come over from maybe 5pm til 8:30pm and we'll have dinner, talk about our week, maybe watch an episode of something on TV and then I'll go home so we can each go to bed and get adequate sleep before work the next day. If we meet up on weekends it's usually to do some kind of thing out of the house like beach or movies or markets or something, and then we'll each depart from there back to our own places.

The only times I've stayed over was the 3 times we had sex and we both got really shitty sleep when we slept in the same bed and I just haven't ever stayed over since then and so we've not have sex in 5 months.

>>34520766
Normally I'd say it'd be best to just end it, but her crying over it, IMO, indicates she does not dislike you, in fact she seems to like you, since she is willing to try and get things better. Usually what happens is that the person just ghosts the other and shows little sign of even wanting them around.

I think the main problem is just probably a lack of communication and interests, but there are some things that I think you need to consider:
>do you have fun when you stay/go out together?
>are you compatible in terms of ideals, interests, views, etc?
>are you or her uninterested when engaging in mory physical stuff?
>do you listen and care for each other?
In short, do you like her? Have you been enjoying the relationship?

I think if you do like each other, then it might be worth it to at least try and make it work, but IF you think the spark just isn't there, then it might be better to just part ways. No need for hard feelings and all, it happens.

>>34521055
>do you have fun when you stay/go out together?
I'd say yes, well I feel incredibly self-conscious and awkward going out and doing anything but she does laugh at the things I say, we maintain conversation when we go out and do things together.
>are you compatible in terms of ideals, interests, views, etc?
She has extreme left-wing political views, like rather radical feminism and left wing environmentalism and LGBT things only her best friend is Jewish so she's pro Israel.
I'm more of a bland political centrist.
>are you or her uninterested when engaging in mory physical stuff?
see this post >>34521014
She doesn't initiate any physical things except cuddling with me on the couch, and I'm terrified of initiating anything in case I get rejected. We will kiss when we see each other and that's it.
>do you listen and care for each other?
She talks a lot about what she wants and feels, and I feel bad about not knowing how to be in a relationship and I definitely feel like I'm basically failing at all of the minimum expected standards. She doesn't complain or nag, just says things she feels are deficient in a kind of extraordinarily accepting manner. She's a very interesting person to me because our lives have been very different (her wealthy upbringing, international travel with family and friends, has a job I'm aiming towards)
I don't understand why she's in a relationship with me to be honest, she is more highly educated, makes more money, is older than me, we're the same height, she's infinitely more socially adept than me.

TThese women are truly like adult children.
>WAAAAHHHHH YOU DON'T TAKE ME OUT TO THE PLAYGROUND ENOUGH!
>WAAAHHHHH YOU NEED TO TAKE ME TO GET ICE CREAM SO I CAN POST IT ON MY SOCIAL MEDIA
>NOOOOOOOOOOO I DON'T WANT SEX I WANT YOU TO PAMPER ME WHILE I GAVE IT AWAY FRO FREE TO OTHER GUYS WHO PUT IN LESS EFFORT
Dump this dumb bitch and get someone who does not withhold sex from you.

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>>34520766
man people are broken

>>34521014
>Why would she cry though?
You are her emotional tampon. She hasn't found a replacement for yet, so you are her punching bag until then.

>>34521147
>>34521151
you're broken too

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>>34521154
>t.

>>34520766
She asked you, as directly as possible, to put more emotional openness and intimacy into the relationship, and your only response is that she hasn't initiated sex in months.

Basic lesson in relationships: for most people, male or female, sex is the product of a general sense of closeness and emotional connection, not the prerequisite for it. Even more basic - she doesn't want to fuck you because she doesn't feel you like her.

>>34520766
>>34521169

This anon is right. She doesn't want to break up with you, she's just feeling neglected. You're feeling neglected too.

You should both take on a mutual compromise and start taking steps towards eachother. Nowhere in your post did I see, for example, you talking to her about what sex means to you and your needs.

She likes you, you both have just been making eachother feel like the other part doesn't. Communicate.

>>34520793
That's so incel but it's true to be honest
Relationships like this always end with them slowly getting far from each other until they just stop talking, and that happened to me a lot and I feel familiar to this exact feeling of emptiness in a relationship

>>34521169
>she doesn't want to fuck you because she doesn't feel you like her
What do you mean? How am I supposed to demonstrate that I like someone except by spending time with them? I told her initially that what I liked about spending time with her was the fact that I was spending time with her, not so much what we were doing. I enjoy being present for her evening routine on a weekday and talking to her more than I like walking along the beach with her dog.

I'm shit at date suggestions though because I literally have zero friends and only leave the house to go to work and the gym and the grocery store. I don't even know what normal people do so she's suggested a lot of the date ideas which I know tends to give women the ick.
>>34521194
I've only had sex 3 times ever, it makes me feel incredibly insecure and horrible if I'm honest. I can't last long, I don't know what I'm doing and we both know that I'm bad at it ad she's unsatisfied because she used a vibrator to climax each time. I just feel like there's no point in us having sex. If she's going to use a sex toy or has to use one then I may as well not even be there.

She asked me once "what is your sex drive like?"

I said "how often do you like to go to the moon?"

She said "never I've never been"

I said "same, I don't have a sex drive if I've never been in a position where I've been able to have sex"

>>34521225
I'm the second guy you replied to, but this part
>what I liked about spending time with her was the fact that I was spending time with her, not so much what we were doing
explains this part
>I'm shit at date suggestions
Who gives a fuck what gives normal women the ick? You're dating YOUR woman, and you verbalized what makes you happy (just being around her, doing whatever), so it's fine that she comes up with the date ideas, which she has given you, as per your OP.

In regards to sex, I get it. Being bad at sex is okay and using a sex toy with your partner can be part of having sex. If this makes you uncomfortable still (which, again, is understandable) you can try to negotiate a middle-ground: you using the sex toy, oral or manual sex in lieu of the sex toy, etc..

TL;DR: You're sabotaging yourself in regards to sex, because you are vulnerable. That's okay, just communicate with your partner, and make sure you respect them and they respect you. And she's giving you the date ideas, she's communicating what she wants. Do the same.

>>34521014
Women will cry over anything. Not even a le women bad statement, it's just what happens when they deal with pretty much any emotionally charged situation, some more than others, so I wouldn't take it as a sign of anything. They cry when caught cheating, they cry when stressed out about work, they cry when someone is mildly rude to them. She might just be crying because, yeah, it's an emotional situation, no matter how she actually feels about it.
It sounds to me like you guys just don't really have a compatible lifestyle with one another, if not for distance then because you can't spend enough one on one time together. It also sounds like you just don't excite her in any way. Not that you have to change in order to do so, just the fact that you're a normal person who doesn't get up to much besides work and your own personal life, and you two don't do much together besides stay in and watch TV. If you're at 6 months and you're not both staying at each other's place regularly with items left behind, and you're not jumping each other's bones as often as possible, then it's just not there, anon. If the relationship had an ounce of passion behind it, you'd be fucking regularly and around each other as much as you could be. I wouldn't look at this as something to fix, because it's a lot harder to change things from how they started than to start something new. I'd say this is over, and your only choice is if it's over now or over later. Take it as a learning opportunity, this is your first real relationship so it wasn't likely to last anyway, just take what you can from it and try again in the future with someone new.

>>34521014
Wow the level of demoralisation. Just sleep over you'll get used to it and sleep fine after a bit. If you move in together you'll save lots of money on rent and one of you can work part time.
You are telling us you think your appearance at work is more important than your woman? How do Americans have the gall to call chinks bugmen? You are the dumbest fucking golem.

> I'm terrified of initiating anything in case I get rejected
Bro she is literally telling you she wants it. Sure it will be awkward first but just keep going and be rough, are you a man or what. If she doesn't like it you'll hear about it don't worry.

>>34520766
>15 years of inceldom
Very obvious why

This woman needs to give up. She tries and instead of compromise or offering ways to save it you passive/aggressively threaten the nuclear option. Lets break up.

The thing with some of you boys. This works with your mom when you threaten to run away from home so you believe it will work with a woman that has a choice. You put as little effort as possible into everything.

>>34521308
She owns her apartment and rents the other bedroom to her friend for $300 per week to help with her mortgage. I currently pay $150 per week to rent a single room in someone's house which is some of the cheapest rent in my whole city. If I moved in with her and she broke up with me I'd be homeless and then I'd never find a place as cheap to rent after.
>You are telling us you think your appearance at work is more important than your woman?
Yes? I need my job. I'm also not American.
>>34521305
How do you have passion after being an incel for 29 years? How can you have passion when you're a 31 year old woman who has had 15 years of relationships and now you're settling with some sperg incel loser? We both have shit boring lives, the "fun" part of life is over for us both except she got to live it and I spent my life being treated like a leper and shunned by society.

>>34521542
>She tries and instead of compromise or offering ways to save it
Proposing her having sex with other men whilst we stay in our dead bedroom relationship isn't saving a relationship it's just me going from being an incel to a cuck. Similarly, her breaking up with me and remaining "friends" is just a soft version of breaking up with me because in reality as soon as she starts dating again she'll forget I exist. Also, remaining friends after to see her get fucked by other men would also make me a cuck.

>>34520766
If you really want this to work, you need to live with her and spend a lot of time together

>>34520766
My gut feeling - assuming this isn't the larp it most likely is - is she's personally offended at the lack of sex, and that proposition is a way of reminding you she knows she'll be desirable to someone, and a way to offend you a little bit in turn, a la
>You're not satisfying me
Sex naturally reduces in frequency as relationships go longer, but none at 6months is a death knell for this relationship.
Thankfully, it sounds like you've done the hard part of breaking up already.
Out of interest, were you attempting to initiate sex and being rejected? Did you not want to fuck her because of a madonna/whore thing? Were you just not physically attracted? Curious.

>>34521554
You're the one that baited her. She didn't suggest an open relationship at all. You are unwilling or incapable of meeting a woman half way. Shes frustrated and hurt so you lob a break up option across the bow. As one anon already mentioned she needs you to listen but you hear bitching from a woman that only fucked you 3 times

>>34521564
When we see each other sex just doesn't enter the equation because we're out of the house doing something, or it's a week night and I go home when she's ready to have a shower and go to bed.
>Out of interest, were you attempting to initiate sex and being rejected? Did you not want to fuck her because of a madonna/whore thing? Were you just not physically attracted? Curious.
She's attractive and I think initially she was at least somewhat physically attracted to me as we had sex on the 3rd date upon her initiation. We had sex 2 more times 1 week apart and then she's just never initiated anything afterwards, I can only assume because I'm shit at sex and she needs a vibrator to climax and she no longer wants to deal with me fumbling around when she can just take care of herself without me. I thought she was just speedrunning the dead bedroom thing I've always read about where women just lose all attraction for their partners and stop having sex entirely but still continue the relationship.
>>34521565
she asked if it would be better if we were not exclusive

how is that not "would you be ok with being a cuck"

>>34521608
>We had sex 2 more times 1 week apart and then she's just never initiated anything afterwards, I can only assume because I'm shit at sex and she needs a vibrator to climax and she no longer wants to deal with me fumbling around when she can just take care of herself without me.
This is going to sound incredibly bluepilled, so bear with me.
You probably think you're bad at sex because you didn't last a long time, weren't able/didn't want to be rough and she didn't cum just from PIV.
I suspect her view of the matter isn't what you think. I reckon a woman in her scenario would be thinking
>This dude was a virgin before he met me, he should be absolutely gagging for it all the time, yet he isn't. He didn't even seem that into it when we did it the first time. Is there something wrong with me? Am I not good enough even for this literal virgin to desire?
It took a few times apologising to partners in the past for me to realise that men's idea of good sex and (most) women's is quite different from one another. You think because you couldn't go 20 mins jackhammering that you're a failed man and she's judging you, meanwhile your partner is over the moon that you were so turned on by them.
I have never had a woman ghost me because I bust quick. They usually take it as a compliment, and are only upset if you then roll over and fall asleep without returning the favour.
If you have any interest in saving this, would highly recommend coming clean about these feelings. Something like
>Since I'm so inexperienced around sex and relationships and stuff, I feel daunted by perceived pressure to perform a certain way, and I feel some shame that I haven't lived up to my own expectations in that department. I would like make it very clear that I am very physically attracted to you, and I don't want you to take my nerves the wrong way.
I know this is
>It's not you it's me
in more flowery writing, but reading between the lines I think this has to be voiced.

>>34521084
>She doesn't initiate any physical things except cuddling with me on the couch, and I'm terrified of initiating anything in case I get rejected. We will kiss when we see each other and that's it.
don't need to read anything else in the thread to know what the problem is. it's a man's job to initiate sex. if you don't, she will feel like you aren't attracted to her. simple as

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>>34520766
Get over your stupid mental barriers and fuck your woman. Simple as that. She needs to get fucked. It's either you or someone else. Go fuck her retard, she is literally begging you.

>>34520766
i really do feel bad for you folks who didn't find a partner before the age of like 20. dealing with middle aged women seems like a fucking nightmare. they're all washed up whores - all of the non-retarded women are already married by the time they get to 25

>>34521773
OP's gf is a washed up whore because she wants sex with her partner and is upset because she isn't getting it?

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>>34520766
>been in relationship for 6 months
>only had sex 3 times, none in 5 months
Run bro. You can get a better gf if you really are gym maxxing and staying fit/healthy

>>34521793
OP literally said she never initiates sex lmao. they're in the early stages of a relationship too. can you blame him for not initiating if she seemingly isn't showing any interest in sex?

she absolutely is a washed up retarded whore who expects OP to be able to read her mind. if she wasn't, she'd be married by now

>>34521799
>She seemingly isn't showing any interest in sex?
You're not serious? I can tell this woman is gagging for it through a screen and thousands of miles.
One does not have to be a mindreader to tell she just needs a good strong rogering and she'll calm down.
You won't get far with women of any age if you expect them to spell stuff out for you.

>>34520766
>get in first relationship ever at 29 after 15 years of inceldom
Why the fuck do you get into a full blown relationship with the first girl you ever had sex with? Why did you do it apparently immediately, with no time to get to know each other?
>told me she liked me but that I'm "really hard to date" and said being in a relationship with me "doesn't feel intimate or romantic"
If you incelled it up until 29, you probably have some issues you should seek a therapist about. Could just be porn brain, but most likely a deeper rooted inability to connect with people.
>despite me gymcelling and looksmaxxing
Heres a hint: Get off tiktock ans stop rotting your brain.
>entailed me going to her yoga class and cooking food with her and planning more things.
Ok that reatrded. Maybe you just found some kind of hyper needy chick who was willing to overlook your incelhood out of desperation. No matter, you are incel no more.-
>I'll be back to being an incel soon
Take a that experience and go get the next chick. You popped your cherry and had sex, the next one should be much easier. Never ever let yourself get dependent on a single woman for your needs, it will be your doom and downfall into marriage.

It's a miracle you even scored. Jfc do not date anyone again

>>34521084
I see. I know it is scary, I'd be reluctant too since it can be embarrassing an all, but maybe you can try to be more assertive, like trying to initiate intimate moments and being more direct with displays of affection and all.
Women, just like men, want to feel like they are loved, and showing interest like that might help in making it clear that you are interested.

Of course, always respect boundaries and all, and try to read her mood. Things like gently stroking her hair and skin, kissing her skin, whispering sweet things to her on her ears and stuff might help set the mood and allow you to see if she wants to take things further.
Like I said before, if you enjoy each other's company, I think it is worth it to keep things going. Women are complicated, it's a bit of a guessing game to understand them sometimes, but it is cool when you start to understand each other's views and needs.

Best wishes to you, OP. I hope things work out well mang.

>>34521084
>and I'm terrified of initiating anything in case I get rejected. We will kiss when we see each other and that's it.

Ok, that makes things clearer. Hell hath no fury like a woman unfucked. Of course shes complaining about not having intimacy, the vast majority of women won't scream in your face that they want you to fuck them.
And yes, the Onus is generally on the man, at least initially.
You have to get over it and just do. And hope your relationship isn't already beyond salvaging, if you leave them out to dry long enough, women will , well , dry out. It is entirely possibel that that ship has sailed already and she no longer sees you in a sexual light so don't be too miffed if she does reject you.

>>34521084
>she's pro Israel.

dump her

end of thread

>>34521014
>Why would she cry though?
LMAO, women cry all the time, dog.

>>34521543
>I need my job.
No social security system? Anyhow,you're not gonna get fired because you seem a bit tired one day at work. Also, you meet on the weekend when shit like this doesn't matter.You're just scared and making excuses.

>How do you have passion after being an incel for 29 years?
Nigger what the fuck. I literally went crazy when presented with a naked woman who wanted to be groped and penetrated after all this time. Pent up passion out the ass, which is part of why she wanted to see me again despite initial awkwardness.
>and now you're settling with some sperg incel loser?
You really, REALLY need to stop rotting your brain with internet memes. Theres a very specific type of woman who "settles" for Beta Bux, and that type would be extremely happy about not even having to fuck you , while already drafting up marriage contracts or get surprise pregnant to secure your shekels.
No woman who doesn't genuinely like you (or is a manipulative shrew) would ever put up with half a year of sexless relationship right off the bat.

You've motlen your brain into slag, stop believing shit on the internet is real.

Ist als all academic anyways, because this post >>34522230
tells it like it is. You don't have to be antisemite, but person of good standing and morals would ever openly support the kikes genocidal acts. At that point a legitimate Meth hooker is a more dignified choice.

>>34521628
ok I will try to say something like this
>>34521874
>Why the fuck do you get into a full blown relationship
Because I was an incel and thought maybe I would be able to learn relationship skills
>porn brain
I don't watch porn or even masturbate, I basically don't have a libido at all
>Get off tiktock ans stop rotting your brain
Gym, skincare, fashion and hair care is normal

>>34521995
>>34522195
Ok I think you're right I have no idea how to do romantic sensual foreplay things and she's basically done everything the 3 times we had sex
>>34522458
Maybe we just have different sex drives. I could go the rest of my life without ever having sex or orgasming and not care. I spent my entire life unable to have sex and I could go the rest of my life without having sex too.

The beta bux angle makes no sense for our relationship because I work 2 part-time jobs and she works one job which makes 5x as much as me, and she comes from generational wealth.

>>34523079
>I have no idea how to do romantic sensual foreplay things
Try just caressing her gently, like stroking her hair and kissing her head. Usually they'll give some sign that they want you to continue or not.
Then you slowly escalate from there, until you do the deed, always paying attention to her signs.

>>34521084
You need to be initiating sex and intimacy almost every time. No way around it. It's just the way women work. Women respond to how you act. You need to understand this. This honestly sounds like the biggest problem you are having. Start slow with touching and kissing and watch how she responds, then escalate if she's into it.

>>34520766
She just broke up with you dumb shit

>>34523079
>I spent my entire life unable to have sex and I could go the rest of my life without having sex too.
Then whats the point of being in a relationship.Just get a roomate or something if you're lonely.
>The beta bux angle makes no sense for our relationship
It was you who mentioned "settling" , I just replied to that.

>>34520766
>she hasn't initiated sex in 5 months
So you've only had sex when she's initiated it?
Have you ever considered, you know, initiating sex yourself?

>>34520766
> gf says the relationship "doesn't feel intimate or romantic"
> But I've been going to the gym and lookmaxxing though???????
Incels and looksmaxers are so pathetic lmao