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How do I stop being so clingy and needy. I know people need space sometimes or are busy, but I like him so much I just want to spend every second with him. I really have no desire to do anything else.
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>>34521004
Common with women. I'll confirm what you already suggested:
A boyfriend is not your toy nor a replacement for a group of friends or a hobby. Give him some space. Be a companion, men love a companion.
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>>34521004
Does it bother him? And does it bother you?
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>>34521004
Balance is important in all things. I think people in general like that you show interest, but also that you give them some space when needed, though it can be hard to gauge when it is the right time to reach out, or if the person will get offended by the fact that you didn't try to reach out enough, etc.

So I think the ideal is to try to reach out to the person, but if they indicate or say they want to be alone for a while, then you leave them to it, unless they are engaging in risky behavior, in which case it's best to attempt to stop them from doing so.
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>>34521052
I don't know, I think he just puts up with it. He's never out right said it bothers him, but I don't want to be overbearing even if I have a hard time controlling it.
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>>34521069
Your boyfriend is accountable for his decisions. If you confront him about it and he says he's okay with it, that's that on his side, you're not a mind-reader.

On your end, it sounds like you're seeking external validation from your boyfriend regardless of how you act. Do you know why?
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>>34521086
Probably anxious attachment, seeking constant validation to quiet the fear of abandonment.
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>>34521114
Then it's less to do with you stopping the clingyness and more to do with that fear of abandonment. I'm sure you love your boyfriend very much, and he seems to reassure you that you are loved back, but right now the problem is that your love language also serves as a convenient means to drown your insecurities.

Why do you fear being abandoned?
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>>34521004
Don’t fight it and be yourself . My girl is constantly putting herself down for being clingy no matter how much I tell her I find it fucking adorable and heartwarming that anyone would think about me that much. In my eyes it’s a blessing to be loved by someone that much and one i will never take for granted



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