I've been on the toilet for over 6 hours now trying to poop, but can't. I've tried pushing as hard as I can - but nothing will budge. What do I do at this point? I'm hopeless. I might as well die on this toilet. I don't see it getting any better.
>>34532885Maybe you don't have to poop?
>>34532885Lots of water and papaya
>>34532885firstly stop pushing unless you want a prolapsed asshole to add to your problems(who am I kidding - you already have one)then pull your pants up and go buy some laxatives ffs, wtf is wrong with people these days?
>>34532885You're gonna give yourself a hemorrhoid. Take a break for a bit.
>>34532885Go to the CVS and get an enema kit.
>>34533484ThisPlus and fibre and more water to your diet.
>>34532885Many options.First get the fuck out of the shitter.Lay in the sofa with your legs straddling over the backrest. Massage your perineum, push it in a way you can mold the hard shit in your rectum a little narrower.Buy a laxative like plum jelly, flax seed, psyllium plantago, drink a scoop with a full glass of water and keep drinking a liter of water until you get the urge to poop a few hours later.You could buy ricin oil and take one spoon and a liter of water, that will absolutely make you explode your shit, too violent I don't recommend, but at least it's an option.Buy glycerin supositories, put two bullets up your ass, hold it for 5 minutes (very strong shittying sensation but you must endure) and you will shit freely.Buy an enema kit, blow water into your rectum and it will be done immediately.
guess shit hit the fan
>>34532885stand up straight and take a deep breath in, then stick both your hands as high in the air as they can go, then start slowly exhaling and say "poop for the poop god, poop for the poop god" over and over again until you're out of air. repeat until poop comes out.
