What is /htdg/?How to Date General is by anons, for anons, about the modern dating landscape. So bring all of your questions about dating here. Some anons on this site actually get partners and laid, and some of them even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date people, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro. >What is /htdg/ not? These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, femlcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, pinkpillers or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating people is hard today, and even harder for some, but /htdg/ is for trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, give up, or insist there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can pollute. BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM! >How to ask for advice Context is important: be more specific than "I got ghosted, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, someone was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with them? How long have you known them? Any conversation screenshots? Etc... Don't forget to ask an actual question. >Resources and Books https://wingman.live/ (AI dating coach) https://www.youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG https://www.youtube.com/@YourWingmam https://pdfcoffee.com/318797392-mark-manson-models-2016pdf-4-pdf-free.html https://archive.org/details/robert-glover-no-more-mr-nice-guy-id-353324692-size-612 https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/ https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq (Leykis 101) https://www.fantasticanachronism.com/p/how-to-be-good-at-dating REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual people in the real world.
Additional videos to watch and reflect.Good starter videos>Why We Shouldn't Leave Incels Behindhttps://youtu.be/xHmDJyVT3g0?si=GEUm2HAZ-I6QpLgY>How To Get A Girlfriendhttps://youtu.be/05tG47pv1vM?si=x6Ngo0hvj7M9L1wn>Dr. K Breaks Down The Science of Flirtinghttps://www.youtube.com/live/0k3YUL3iQds?si=OvrpJ6ZNK0je7Ybq>How To ACTUALLY Find The Right Person For Youhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iSfuHwENzXM>Why Your Tinder Match Isn't Going To Date Youhttps://youtu.be/KJX-8C7OHmw?si=5HcbRpJbUa7PE-gOMore for Men>Why You Should NEVER Confess Your Lovehttps://youtu.be/xHkcIRZa6lo?si=zGxmCIXyHEAbsXdQ>Can Men & Women Be Friends?https://youtu.be/OafdDpFjOIg?si=O4SIMEOF5EzBFKN7>The Interesting Truth About What Women Need Today & How To Get What YOU Want!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2mD6_g3xpk>5 Harsh Realities About Women | Every Man MUST Face Alone!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkhLybpZKzIMore for women>10 Brutal Dating Tips for Women That Women Need to Hear | And Men Need to Share!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCMKgpl7HW4>Why You're The Least Valuable Friendhttps://youtu.be/ql5sWIEAcFw?si=lYx6LPTx8xaaS7OM>Why Women Can't Find A Soulmatehttps://youtu.be/58kdlgKvEU0?si=ZskCXZLFY1iMmbpF>A Perspective on Female Lonelinesshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UbGZaGzWdfsExtras>How Your Brain Perceives Love When You Have Autismhttps://youtu.be/KlSsI2CKYaQ?si=1XYAjx97G9oeNeS_>Men Are Getting This Totally Wrong About Being A Simp or Nice Guy!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn-U2Sx4spo>The Addiction Women Can't Talk Abouthttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDv-bX7Pegg>Your Standards Are Way Higher Than They Should Behttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diIc5e2RLKI>"Why Women Deserve Less": Myron Gaines Loves Projection & Bad Mathhttps://youtu.be/u6QcjXub8fo?si=6TaYexKVRHBncmOm>Why 40% Of Young Men Need Erectile Retraininghttps://youtu.be/2MwTDoT8q_A?si=C-7aytPOjXwgOuIX
>>34970555>I also don’t know if it’s weird if I respond or text again when I was the last to send a message and she just heart reacted itWhy would it be weird? The conversation ended and you'll start a new one by asking her out. Come on dude if you had pussy before you know more or less how this shit goes, if she wants to meet she'll make it easy.And having sex is important if you want the relationship to move forward, and sex feels good right? So why not move towards sex? Trust me, invite her for drinks, touch her, kiss, and then invite her over, just let your desire for her guide you while respecting her boundaries.>>34970788Seduction is an art in a way. Between two healthy people it takes openess and emotional intimacy while keeping boundaries. Time is also important, healthy women take some time to warm up to you.Female desire is complex, but not in the sense that you have to figure out magic words or behaviors.Idk man, the key is spending time with her, doing fun things, presenting who you are in an unassuming way, and she'll warm up to you. Every woman has her time, some get intimate in 1 or 2 dates some take 4-5. Patience is key!
>>34973381Hmm...Well, it seems you're naturally aware of social dynamics unlike the other autists here, so you know your dynamic with this girl way better than any of us here, but let me tell you what I think.Keep trying to strike conversations with her. If she is a late night gamer it's possible she doesn't have much experience dating.What you want to know is if she is open to dating and if she's open to dating you, meaning, if she thinks you're attractive or not.Maybe try "so you're a gamer huh?" or something like that. Something very casual and get a conversation going beyond just "hi" and her "bullying". If the conversation develops, invite her for something casual and easy, maybe coffee, or maybe a spot to grab a bite close to your job.You want to establish rapport with her. When you talk smile randomly and see if she smiles back. You know, there are things a woman does when she's somewhat interested. You take it from there and keep escalating, it's your job as a man to break barriers... present yourself to her and let her decide if she likes you.
>Was always dating, fucking, or at least talking to someone all through high school >Had a lot of sex during college>2020 hits>Working full time since then>Moved to a different state>Lucky if I get 1 date a year>29Where the fuck do I meet women as a functional adult? I know it's not a personality issue. Women like me and I've always had more female friends than male, but my normal day to day does not involve women at all. I work, lift, and work on personal projects at home.
>>34974000Dating apps.
>htdg>hotdog
>>34974000Once you start hitting 30 and have a "life" it gets a bit harder. Most I can recommend is find some local meet ups or hobby groups, even give in to trivia night because shit like that still beats sitting at home. If all else fails, try even starting your own groups and see who turns up. The hiking group I'm in is barely 3 years old and gets a surprisingly good amount of people. Even something simple as coffee and chat will bring people in.
>>34974106>Most I can recommend is find some local meet ups or hobby groups, even give in to trivia night because shit like that still beats sitting at home. If all else fails, try even starting your own groups and see who turns up.Yeah, I also recommend pottery, mini-golf...hahahahaha bro shut upDating apps are simply better and you can find women who align with you. Kids, politics, age, etc etc all the eliminatory info is there before you even meet the person.You go on some "trivia night" shit and waste time on a single mom... fuck off.
How do you approach the 6 month mask off phase? Do you remain optimistically detached? Does the honeymoon phase just not apply to you?It seems like for me that around that time for me things start going downhill. The chemistry at the beginning is always good, we have talks about our future plans which we usually agree on, we leave each other spent in bed, we generally get along quite well, but I can't seem to find a genuine person. It seems to regularly come up that they were dishonest about something that I don't have a feasible way of vetting for. >changed my mind! I don't want kids.>changed my mind! I wanna go poly.>changed my mind! I'm gonna cheat.>changed my mind! I need to find myself.>etc.I'm fun to be around for the first few months, but they either have some other shit going on or get bored even though I present myself consistently. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong.
>>34974263Sucks to suck lol
>>34974272That's a bit of a hard one. There are a lot of variables that can go in to that. It could just be simply bad luck. At the same time it could be you are subconsciously choosing people based off a type of attachment style you have. How do these people act around you and how do you feel around them? I have a long video that deep dives in to that but it might be worth watching a bit too see if maybe the genral personality you go for leads why you keep picking fickle women.https://youtu.be/FAzsArI7QJo?is=zsoWMYZlziWUd1Zv
>>34974433Initially we start of friendly, we share space and get to know each other passively, eventually they show some kind of attraction to me and one thing leads to another, there. I try to go for women who seem to think for themselves, they could be artistic, spiritual, or some other alternative niche, but the typical soon to be Facebook mom just doesn't intrest me in the slightest. It's not necessarily like I'm looking for a shrew to tame, though I do like the tomboyish type, just someone sincere and thoughtful. Unapologetically themselves and want to share that picture frame with me, as I do them. They always present themselves passionately that way, but it just falls apart. I'm not a saint or perfect by any stretch but I own myself, too. When we're in public or private they seem initially excited to see me when I'm around and openly affectionate. We can smile, laugh, joke, or chill, and just enjoy each other's company. I can't even tell you how often they've felt so at ease with me that they just pass out in my lap before waking up all affectionate again. I've normally felt pretty comfortable up until things change on the other end, and most recently I felt pretty anxious for a few months about her behavior at that point. I clocked that this was going to happen again, but decided to ride it out a little just in case it's me projecting trauma, but I was disappointed again. She moved like a cheater, assured me everything was fine, then all but verifiably cheated. Plausible denyablity and all that, but all the other signs were there before she moved on to another guy within a couple days of saying I love you for the last time.
