I know girls really like when you approach them with humor to break the tension and show your interest, but I have a really hard time doing that. I usually stick with the "just thought you were super cute and just wanted to speak to you", - to mixed results - but it comes off as stiff at times, and I'd like to be more relaxed and expressive... but I can't seem to get out of my head to do so.

Any tips? A good introduction really sets the tone for the interaction.

>>34975510
if you dont have humour, be casual, youre right about looking too stiff, I think
go to a Third place with a date thats setup, or maybe a social event with a specific purpose.

>>34975510
You're focusing too much on what you don't have. We all have qualities Chad has, but it just is we have some that are a bit more than others. I bet you're probably someone from a rough background, and boom that is a Chad quality for example. Think about that.

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>>34975480
consider the following

The married woman im messing with started ghosting my flirty msgs. I don't want to push further so she doesnt block me or tell her husband but how can i win her back? Right now im msging every week to try catch her during ovulation

>>34975510
I don’t see an issue with being direct, but as you pointed out it’s important to be loose and expressive. If you’re just chilling then randomly approach a girl you probably are going to be a bit in your head. One way to get over this is by approaching more girls. It’s not uncommon for guys to do this to approach 10 or more girls in a row and unsurprisingly you will be way looser on number 10. Though this is a bit much for a lot of people. Honestly you should get on dating apps. If you are already dating, and actively messaging, calling, voice noting women or whatever then you’re already in lots of conversations. Approaching is a lot easier, especially with this confidence boost. It’s rough because you probably rarely approach girls then have to turn it ‘on’ suddenly. There’s a lot more to it but should be a good start. Also start being mindful of when you just feel looser in your normal life. You could do something to get you looser before you even go to the bar.

>>34975480
i just wanna add that if you are attempting to get women at your job its an immediate no. got asked for my socials twice at a grocery store & my bank

Dating puts you face to face with how much of a man you are. That’s why it’s so stressful. If you didn’t have the best upbringing, surprise surprise that can affect your dating life even as an adult. Your fucking childhood levels of confidence are still with you now. Some people are so fucked and the reality that they suck with women causes them to develop all these weird theories about women and why they can’t get laid.
How much of a man are you is the question. And if you aren’t very man then buckle up for a long journey of rejections and trying to figure out why the fuck this is such a struggle. If you really WANT to get laid you will but you’re in conflict. You think you want to get laid but you have all these conflicting desires, unsure about yourself, not comfortable with your sexuality, insecurities and such. These are all fucking with your desire to get laid. Then you see some fucking idiot guys that don’t have these hangups and they will be fucking really hot women with ease. This really goes a lot deeper than women, just all this stuff comes into your face when you are trying to get women. It’s about your ability to get what you want, what you believe you deserve and are worth. And a lot of guys don’t even think they deserve much. But they will blame other things. So when your intention to meet a girl or have sex is really clear, you are going to find women. When your intention isn’t prepare for the struggle to clarify it.

Never look for an easy way out when falling in love.

Tips for hinge?

>>34975510
I think that being direct with your intentions is a good thing and your example isn't inherently stiff (but it's not great either) so I would assume that it's your delivery that's the problem. Is there any reason you can't say that (or a similar opener) while feeling relaxed and expressive? Do you struggle with the rest of the conversation after the introduction?

>>34975480
does anyone have that one free quiz about how to be a good man or how to have a good relationship? it was from a guy who dated and married a very trad christian girl.

Have a few irons in the fire here lads. Idk how it's possible that I've ended up with a decent selection I can choose from on these apps. I'm just average looking, but in shape, pics are average nothing special either. I'm 31 and matching mostly mid to late 20s. I live in between 2 cities so every date is a bit of a journey.

>Native chick 1, looks chubby but big tits, really easy to talk to and text, but lives far away. Texting for the last week pretty heavily, wanted to meet her this weekend but couldn't so probably will next weekend.
>Native chick 2, similar to chick 1, looks chubby and kinda mid, but genuinely the best texter I've talked to. She is working today and something tomorrow, but will get something arranged with her.
>Danish chick, met her last night half way between, not that hot, just started masters degree here. But she was very into me, eventually get her back to my car after a few hours while we are waiting for the bus and start kissing and touching her for a while.
>Eastern European but lived here since a child, probably the hottest chick I've matched with on the apps. Her conversation is dreadful and because I've had some options I honestly wanted to drop her. So I just yolo'd it gave her my number and told her to text me and see what we can arrange, hoping she'd not be arsed, but she did. She still keeps the conversation going, but is so fucking shit at texting it's unreal and its not a language barrier issue, she's fluent and probably has a similar accent.

So this leaves me in a position where, my 2 favourites live far away but in a similarish location. So my plan for them is to try and go back to back next Saturday. Then the Danish chick is literally dtf the next time I see her, but I probably need to travel to her to do that, but she's the opposite direction. Which leaves Eastern European chick that I just need to dump off because her conversation is so bad. This isn't me bragging at all. I only went on my first dating app date in May.

I've never been an intuitive guy, I'm someone who learns by watching others, dissecting it, understanding it, then implementing and ultimately improving it. Which is to say, if I could attach a mic on someone super successful with girls and see how they conversate and what they do when approaching and hanging out with girls, that's all I would need.

>>34975576
Best reply, thanks. I always get more "tense" when I've been out of the talking game for a while but it gets easier after just doing it and fumbling the first one
>>34976160
Oh yeah there's nothing wrong with my reply and its not all the time that I'm stiff about it, it just depends on my mood
Rest of the conversation usually depends on how receptive she is to my approach, although I tend to stick with relatively safe questions like where shes from, how long shes been here, her religion, stuff like that. As a Christian, those things are important to me. I'd like to be a bit funnier cause I am a funny guy but that will just come with increased volume I suppose

>>34976601
Maybe this has worked for you so far with a lot of things in life but its really just advanced mimicry and not the real you. Your tuition will take you farther in life, especially in unfamiliar situations, and bring you more in touch with who you are inside and in the world.
Moreover you sound mad corny and egotistical. You don't need shit except to learn how to be yourself and accept the potential of rejection while finding out who you are, because we're simply not compatible with most women, and them turning us down doesn't make us any less of men. Go ahead and get off that "mic on a successful guy" idea, you're overcomplicating it and putting another mans testicles on a pedestal

>>34976569
>This isn't me bragging at all. I only went on my first dating app date in May.
>I'm just average looking, but in shape,
turns out maybe the "safe bet" is the thing women want.
what does your profile say?

Staid up until 3am chatting with a woman I met last night at a work event, nerdily loredumping into each other after everyone else had left or gone to bed. Then we said bye and went home separately. I'm autistic and have no idea how to read "clues" or make "moves". Nice. Crushing hard on her. She's very well read and smart.

Even if you attribute everything to prudence and virtue and discount as much as possible the power of fortune you must at least admit that it is very important to be born or to live in a time that prizes highly the virtues and qualities in which you excel. Take the example of Fabius Maximus whose great reputation resulted from his being by nature hesitant. He found himself in a war in which impetuousity was ruinous whereas procrastination was useful. At another time the opposite could have been true his times needed his qualities and that was his fortune. To be sure if a man could change his nature to suit the conditions of the times he would be much less dominated by fortune but that is most difficult and perhaps even impossible.

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Reminder that she expects you to hit on her.

Beautiful women don't fuck cowards.

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Regarding monkey branch, how do women lock in and actually do the move?
What's the sign that tells them "yeah do it now"

I just realized I might be in the middle of it.

>>34976973

If she keeps looking at your lips, shoulders, faces you directly, laughs at stupid shit, etc. then she's digging the vibe. It not enough to get you across the finish line 100% of the time but it's a good tell.

>>34976957
I use Tinder and Hinge. Tinder I don't have any info or interests put in, it's just pictures. As I said, just in shape but nothing amazing. Hinge my prompts are niche, one in particular is about a very specific historical event and it gets the most traction. It's just volume to getting matches, and then I've gotten better over time at talking. So anybody who starts talking back to me with 5+ messages I'd expect maybe a 50% hit rate of getting to a date if I wanted to. I swipe right on everything and send out a lot of hinge matches, but I'll filter out 3/4 of what I match with.

simping for a chick in therapy
how retarded on a scale of 1 to 10?

>>34977723
11

Intention
Approaching a girl when you don’t feel like it just because “I need to approach a girl to get laid” won’t work. Messaging a girl because “I need to message a girl to get laid” wont work either. You have to be 100% aligned towards “I am doing this because I truly and actually want to meet this woman or get this woman”. Anything less than that you’re fucked. Many fail at approaching because they kindve want to but they kindve dont and then they just force themselves to do it, this “forcing” a woman can feel and she senses ‘what the fuck is going on here, why is this guy who seems like he doesn’t want to talk to me be talking to me’ - she figures you are confused, hiding something, or whatever and she will not respond to you well. 100% alignment in I am doing this because I want her not because I should be doing this or because doing this is the right thing for me to do, it’s I WANT this. Now all of sudden, not every girl will say yes but now many girls are saying yes. Because your signal is clear, you want her, she will decide yes or no - much better than having a fucked up and confused signal where the girl has no idea what you actually want from her.

I’m finding it harder and harder to pull out. The last girl I was with was a close call in terms of my self-control. The girl I’m talking to now is up there as one of the hottest I’ve dated. If this works out, it’s over for me.

real thread btw

>>>34973462
>>>34973462
>>>34973462

>>34977868
100%.

I know it sucks and most people are tired of hearing it, but you do have to be comfortable being alone and single. Do not try to force a connection. You want them to be with you because they actually want too, not because they owe you or because they are forced too.

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>>34975480
>https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq (Leykis 101)

This is the most retarded thing I have ever read. Why is this in the OP?

>>34976107
Honestly don't bother. Just speak to women in real life.

My dad had a retirement party last night. There was a cute latina bartender there that I liked and she was my type. She actually works with my dad at his second part time job (they bartend together). My sister was also gassing her up at the party and got her instagram. She introduced us to each other and I ordered a drink. That was about the extent that we talked to each other. Im wondering how I can salvage this situation since I was kind of being a timid beta and didnt talk to her myself outside of the brief introduction. I mean my sister did get her instagram, and my dad does work with her but I dont drink often or go to his bar a lot. Wondering if I blew my chance and should just move on or to be a creep on talk to her on instagram

>>34979243
Cool. What does that have to do with getting women though? No one even asked this question so why post it? Are you here to try and help people get in to non-toxic and stable relationships or just to spout platitudes that could easily be debunked or solved by doing very basic things like talking to the girl you have an interest in?

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I approached this girl today at the supermarket, and it went really well. >but ye I was wondering if I could get your number
>well, I'll give you my IG (smile)
I know foids now do this, but isn't her private IG more personal than the phone number? Why is this?

>>34979827
>but isn't her private IG more personal than the phone number
Absolutely not, a phone number gives you the ability to call her and have a direct hotline to her phone at all times, with instagram they can just ignore the noise.

>>34975595
Is there anything I can do except suffer through it?

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>>34979830
you can literally block a number after it calls you or texts you, so not really lol

Anyone in 4chan? How did the convo go when you got a woman to give you her number or something? Or got her to go on a date or have sex or whatever? I'm not sure what to say. I am not afraid of approaching, I just want to know how to flirt better.

>>34980083
You can do that with instagram too, the difference is having that option.
Go ask women and tell me the answers, go ahead.

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Is there a good structure for a first message on dating apps? I usually go with something like: hey, [her_name]. I liked something I saw your profile (a place she's been/hobby/funny story), and a question to get the conversation going. It might be a little boring but what else can I send her? When girls message me first they usually send only hi. I think a good opening line sets the tone for the rest of interaction (if any desu, most don't bother replying anyway).

>>34980141
Girls don't have to think about openers, you have to stand out in a sea of random retards sending "hey"

>>34980141
over the summer I started opening with "what was the most fun thing youve done this summer" and it was extremely good at getting informative replies. You could probably use it for any season since girls like all seasons. In spring you can ask them what theyre looking forward to most for their summer. Autumn and winter can stand on their own

>>34975564
What does this mean? I don't get the point

>>34980141
It's always good to ask her questions about similar interests or hobbies she has or hints at in her profile. >>34980496 I think is a pretty good advice as well.

This video might help you as well.

>How To Actually Be Good At Texting (With Anyone)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RqbsHlqrUg

>>34980527
It's looksmaxxing bullshit. Just ignore it.

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How do i not care about women or sex and just live peacfully pursuing my dreams? I cant stand it anymore. In person approach is a bit better than apps, i did it a few months ago and got a date. She wasnt into me but i did enough to interest her that she want on a few dates before she asked to be friends (said no). Havent done it since though, i find myself failing to justify the effort to myself after years of ghosting, flakes, and women just acting shitty. Sure, maybe im not as much of a catch as id like to think who knows, every woman ive fucked has said im hot as fuck, but im sure women mostly try to bang dudes they find attractive anyway so that might not be a great point.

>>34980527
it means it is mostly about the looks and inherent genetic traits due to whats called “halo” (and failo) effect
i.e. the exact same behavior will be seen differently depending on your attractiveness level
a good looking man is confident
an ugly man is overconfident/cocky
a good looking man is humble and misterious
a bad looking man is creepy and antisocial

and so on, and so on

>>34975480
ok so how do i actually get a gf/fwb without being 6 foot+ and/or attractive? you niggas actually want me to cold approach bitches in public?

>>34982053
dont be fat. thats all there is to it.

What are y'all's experiences with aspiemaxxing on the apps?

Initially I tried to be very normal and unassuming and it worked okay, I managed to find a few date options here and there but the women were all soul numbingly boring (I was genuinely shocked the first time I checked out the apps to see how lame everyone is).

At this point, because I'm also not desperate to find anyone, I'm considering just having a weird ass profile and fishing for the one or two genuinely weird people but also fear of nuking any other option out there by doing that.

I told myself I don't need to find someone weird or nerdy for the longest time as I don't believe I need to be 100% compatible on that front with a romantic partner but man it's just so torturous.

Did anyone find success that way? For reference, I'm realistically a 5/10, good financials/homeowner, real hobbies and all.

Dating a diva is one thing, but do not date a woman who would rather have pride than be with you.

How can I use my good relationship with a woman’s mother to get closer to the woman herself? Her mother really loves me.

>>34982053
To get a girlfriend, you need to become friends with a girl. To get a friend with benefits you need to get a friend.

In other words, you need to be friends with them first. That's why friend is in the word, because that's what they are at the core, friends. If they don't feel like you are a friend or friendly then they aren't going to interact with you.

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>a girl 10 years younger than me (22) comes to our company as a part-timer
>is friendly with everyone
>a year ago, invite her out to lunch, and to some work-related outings
>she agrees, have a good time
>few weeks later, ask her out for a date spilling my spaghetti in the process
>she declines, pretending to not understand I've asked her out
>whatever, I can take the hint: do not approach her at all for the past 10 months
>today, a friend of mine asks a co-worker (who is her manager) whether he can introduce me to someone
>co-worker replies "nah, he (me) already got a yellow card"
I suppose I should be happy I didn't get #metoo'd, but Jesus fucking Christ.
You ask a girl ONE time and you get blacklisted from ever being near her or her acquaintances, except you won't ever know.
Zero desire to aim for a younger girl after shit like this.

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Found this video today. Does a fantastic job showing how chud dating is completely flawed, by showing how flawed feminist and pinkpilled rhetorics and research is wrong.

>The Good Men Did Not Disappear
https://youtu.be/eZxgreSvAAQ?si=jhr5D-XyDFglqT8i

>In 2009 Okcupid published in 2009 that women rated 80% of men below average in looks.
>What was left out, also stated in the original data published, was that those same women messaged those men across the entire curve.

Women literally do not care that much about your looks or how fat your wallet is. Only shallow thots and whores do.

Is it a bad sign if a girl has mostly male friends? Im talking to a girl and she is interested, but I looked at her instagram for a bit and it's always the same 5 dudes replying to her posts, the only woman who ever replied was her mom.

>>34980527
are you indian?

>>34982846
This isn't a younger women thing as much as it's an all women thing. It's why modern dating advice for men discourages chasing someone who already told you no. Also why modern dating advice for men discourages doing this shit at your job unless you're planning to quit soon.

>>34983452
ARe they her real, IRL friends or online simps?

>>34982146
yeh actually i made quite an intense profile and a girl messaged me, but i kinda messed it up, was too fragile, didnt keep frame, did some kinda beta stuff, let her bother me too much and it put her off. if i could have been a bit more stoic and a bit more firm in my frame, then i think it would have worked.

>>34982846
i regret to inform you it is all women of all ages.
women, please start actually informing men when you don't want to be with them, you can tell us white men, we won't beat you.

>>34984004
spindily nerdling talking for all men

as a 21 yo guy with 0 experience what would be the best way to find someone? Should I give apps a try or should I try something irl ?

Literally how do you even psyop a foid into finding you hot enough that she’s willing to take her clothes off in front of you
How the fuck does that even work, someone liking you enough that they’re willing to get naked for you
It’s an alien concept to me

>>34984385
Same way she's psyopping you into taking your clothes in front of her?

>>34984389
But I’m a subhuman. Ain’t no way any foid could be attracted to me

>>34984385
By not being a terminally online retard who unironically used the word foid.

>>34983452
I've literally never seen that scenario work out for the orbiters, either they're already rejected or they will be, or they're genuinely just friends.

>>34982846
>friend gets stopped from setting you up with someone who already rejected you
>"blacklisted" from being around someone you were already avoiding
>zero other consequences
Calling it a yellow card is pretty cringe, but otherwise it sounds like you got away with it.

>>34984560
I only use it online so it’s ok. I’d never ever ever use it irl

How soon can after moving conversation from bumble to text can I expect to fuck? Stoner milf is 10yrs older than me and we’ve been back and forth for about three days.

I can only attract single moms looking for beta buxx on the apps. This last one was very sexual with me which was nice after a long dead bedroom. But she was also crazy clingy and I was much happier alone working out and playing video games. I just want a normal young mildly attractive woman without a kid that I can go do all kinds of fun things with. But it seems like if you aren't around those types at work or school you are just screwed. Why would they be on the apps? And if they are they get thousands of messages. Has anyone tried speed dating or something crazy like a singles cruise?

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>meet asian milf single mom on Hinge
>invite her out
>first date coffee, hug at end, no kiss (her body language said no)
>2nd date at some cheap italian place, $70 bill, ended with a hug
>3rd date was a walk by the river, sat on a log, asked her if she wanted to kiss, she said okay
>we made out on the log by the river for like 5 minutes, I felt up her tits a bit and her breathing got heavy
>walk back to cars, kiss her goodbye
>she texts me "HR breakup text" type shit a few days later when I ask to hangout
>says we can still be friends
>I ignore her message for a few days cause I'm seeing other women
>finally message "sure we can still have some fun sometime"
>she says sure
>a week later I ask her to hangout, watch a movie at her place
>she wants to go out and see one
>I say I don't like any of what's in theaters
>plans don't work out
>ask her if she's down again this week after a week no contact
>she says sure and says she can stay late at work a different night to fit my schedule
>invite myself over again
>she offers to go out and see a movie, and says "my treat"
Am I getting pussy or not? She said she didn't feel a "romantic spark" or whatever, but she also didn't mind us making out. She said she was nervous. She's late 30s, I'm early 30s. I already have other girls I am banging but I'd like to bang her too. Do I have any chance here? Should I ask her straight up to be FWB? I figured doing that would ruin my chances so I said "we could still have some fun sometime" but she probably interpreted it as some gay beta friendzone date. Should I just say "no thanks" and delete Hinge?

>>34979830
no it isn’t better
in fact she gave you instagram with the intention of you checking out all gigachads who are also her followers, who run a train trough her

>>34985167
why are you projecting your cuck fantasies now nigga

>>34985173
>saying the truth is le cucked

let me guess
your girlfriend/wife had a bodycount before you met her?

>>34984998
I mean, if she's paying fuck it why not. Make out with her in the theater and try and bang after. If she still says no just ghost her again until she offers to pay for more dates or puts out. If you want to fuck but arent desperate for pussy, who cares. She is a single mom, so she might not be able to have you over if her kid is there hence the avoidance. If it gets more annoying yea you could just be straight up. But idk i suck with women.

>>34985185
She told me what days she has her kid (shared custody) and she doesn't have him on the days I ask to come over.

It's weird because she rebuffs me coming over to her place, but she wanted to be friends (she could have just blocked me) and now is offering to pay for a movie. I could be seeing a different girl tomorrow night instead so I'm trying to decide between the one I actually am banging versus one I might bang.

i'm starting to feel that dating is about finding someone with similar SMV to you
and i mean insanely close in SMV

like if a girl is below your level by even a bit she will behave oddly
and if she's even a bit too high she will get the "ick"

of course it's all perception, and your behavior can influence perceived smv

BUT it's not about going so high above hers is what i'm getting at

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So I told her she seemed stressed the last time we met (which she did) and she said that she was and she wants to focus on her new job and finding a new place.
Is this it? Are we done? It feels kinda final.
She also said "thank you [teary eye emoji]" but it could be in reply to something else I said (I dont want to open the app), if not it may just be over(tm).
Do I just give up or is there some way to salvage this? I'm thinking of saying something like
>maybe we can get drinks to celebrate once you get a new place
But I don't know if I send it now or wait a day or two.
or do I just cut my losses now?
It sucks remembering how happy and excited she was after the first date and now I feel like I've just been annoying her because I met her at literally the worst time possible.

I’ve fucked so many women. Like I can’t remember how many and I’m sure I’ve forgotten some. I’m not proud of this now.
I’ve had two long term gfs. The first I was young like early 20s and it was really just silly puppy love.
The second i met when I was 27 and she was the first woman I ever truly gave all of myself to in the emotional / vulnerable sense.
Inbetween this I did have a lot of casual sex as I said. I was really insecure and used women / sex to validate me.

Now I am 30 and I did meet a girl I really like. It’s early but going well and she really likes me to.
We share similar values, lifestyles and interests. I do think she is very pretty. And I feel calm and relaxed with her like I can be myself. It’s comfortable.
But in my head I wonder if I’ll meet someone that’s a better match or is hotter or something. I dunno.
Am I fucked? Is this what people talk about when they say hook ups / dating apps are damaging?
Is getting your dick sucked by objectively hot women fun? Yes. Does it get old and haunt me the older I get? Yes.

is it possible to come back from 5 double texts?

I haven't spoken to a women with the purpose of getting their number in so long that I worry I'm gonna stutter my own name when introducing myself. I'm genuinely considering writing my name and number on a piece of paper and just handing it to the girl, lol.

>>34982846
So you're not gonna date younger women because you fucked up with a woman at work? What are you a fucking retard? Maybe you should try not dating women at work, and still try to date younger women, you fucking retard

>>34986439
why the fuck are you sending 5 double texts
I don't think there's ever been a situation where I acted like a massive dick where the girl didn't try to pull me in harder

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>Girl is interested in me
>I show no signs, just normal base friendliness
>All my texts are kinda detached, no profile pic, no socials, just professional
>Not one text with cringy shit like good morning how are you or hope you sleep well or anything like that
>She keeps trying to get closer and closer constantly
Why are foids like this?
Like genuinely what's the psychology explaining this, it makes no sense.

Too many simps so self respecting men are a rarity?

>>34986608
bro you text foids?
the fuck are you even doing on this website
go download snapchat or some other normgroid app and be a normalfag somewhere else dude

>>34986629
Barely, which is why I'm surprised at how well this works, it's like a cheat code.
Surely the dudes in a "how to get women" thread text to foids every now and then.

>>34986639
>how well this works
please elaborate

>>34986723
I mean I already did, show interest but don't chase them like a needy pup, not out of desperation but out of genuinely being busy and doing other shit with only some of it being hard to get.
Just turn the tables on them, imagine how many dumb dudes each girl has texting them stuff and desperately looking for her attention.

>>34986730
could you please be a little bit more vague?

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>>34986608
Women want security and stability in a man. You treat her nice, you don't freak out at tiny ass things. How does that not make sense to you? Reverse the roles. Do you want to date a bipolar demon where you have to walk on egg shells and always seems to get in trouble and can't hold down their emotions or a job or a woman who isn't going to try and stab you over spilled milk, doesn't need to be constantly supervised and can take care of a sack of flower like a baby?

This video also explains what women are looking for in a man, and unsurprisingly looks and being a chad aren't on the top.

>The Secret Reason Why Women Reject You
https://youtu.be/Uu2vnc7nrlY?si=ZQ2KywMr6vAZF7ol

>>34975480
They need to make a How To Hate Women General.

>how to get women
Haven't you considered to change this demeaning title for both genders yet OP?

>>34986608
These also go in to deep detail about how the dating pipeline generally works.

>Why You Should NEVER Confess Your Love
https://youtu.be/xHkcIRZa6lo?si=zGxmCIXyHEAbsXdQ
>Can Men & Women Be Friends?
https://youtu.be/OafdDpFjOIg?si=O4SIMEOF5EzBFKN7

>>34986917
Already did. Though the OP still needs some work.

>>>34973462

I'm trying to find more resources that aren't red/pink pill bullshit and I forgot to take off a few links, but it's a work in progress I guess.

>>34986929
Did what?

>>34975595
>prepare
I'll give you two thumbs up.
I might not put it in terms of "how much of a man you are". I would say how well integrated you are or how well you have owned your various parts. Basically there is a shadow entity in us where we tuck away all the shit we don't want to face. Well bud, dating or trying to date unpacks all that. But the general message is very precise. This is exactly what is happening.

My current struggle is deciding if it's really worth it. There are plenty of paths towards self discovery. I am not certain "success" with women is the one I am most drawn to. As I've aged the drama of getting laid thins. I don't hold a grudge against women, but I don't really see much value there lol, as far as investing much time and energy.

>>34986912
>This video also explains what women are looking for in a man, and unsurprisingly looks and being a chad aren't on the top.
>self reported data

ummm anon

Anyone here that's seen escorts? Is it better value in current year?

I have a date tomorrow, she likes football and is a fan of the same team as i am.
She's hot too. Feeling good bros.
Plan is to taker her home after the game to ask for takeout netflix & chill, excuse is 3 month old cat recently adopted (spend most of the time with him but he doesn't mind me going out for a while).
So, any advice?

>>34985921
>But in my head I wonder if I’ll meet someone that’s a better match or is hotter or something. I dunno.
exactly this is the case
the perception that someone is better is a modern problem
imagine you lived in a small village like human's did in most of history
you wouldn't even have this thought

now you have choices and that's not necessarily a good thing

How do I show 'romance'?
I've had two times now where I've started with a good starter first date, only to fuck it up in the second one because of a lack of romance that I apparently don't show.
Is it like also a hinge thing as well? Because that's how I've gotten these girls.

>>34988486
genioplasty or double jaw if your recession is severe

>>34988490
My chin is fine, I just suck lol

>>34988500
have you considered “fine” in the age if hypergamy may as well mean sub5

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>friend is an actual chad
>his phone has 15+ girls texting him at all times, they all want to date him, he has pumped n dumped most of them already, but he breaks up with them "nicely" so they still want him
It's true the top 1% of men are fucking all the bitches and if you marry a 30 something hag she will be ran through by chads. My chad friend is doing the running through.

I have a kid with a woman that is nice but doesn't gives two shits about my situation although I still get along with her. If ever I stumble or fall, I can't expect her to help.

The more I read about getting women, the more I am worried about ever getting married to someone who actually cares (and with whom I can have sex once in a while).

I got to travel a bit, now I am currently looking to find work that I enjoy (the one I have now sucks). Working only to pay bills and support my kid and be nice to his mother isn't very interesting to me.
I wouldn't want to release that support in the sense I prefer to be ethical however maybe I should just let myself go if I can't be enjoying myself.

I guess that's all there is to life, isn't it?

>>34981809
this is the ticket - after seeing how the only foreseeable options for me are to be either be a golden retriever or a pick me to girls already run through by chad who want to increasingly selfish dictate relationships completely in their selfish favor id rather focus on just living a minimal life and doing nothing to benefit society- a lot of vidya with personal hobbies like streaming.

>>34980228
plenty of girls also just send openers of heyy and its even more repulsive

>>34988516
I dont get why they would match with me and go on dates if I was a sub5.
Then again, its looking more and more that hinge is a terrible way to find a first time relationship with the flops Ive had so idk.

>>34988647
what ages are they?

>>34988653
All are in that 20 - 22 age range. I'm 22

>>34988658
then idk bro
I don’t know you and how you look
maybe better you looks better than you think you are
maybe you don’t
guesswork would be silly

>>34988667
Judging that girls don't disperse and Ive gotten at least one time where they came up to me, safe to say I'm average at best.
That's why I assume my main problem is my lack of romance

>>34979827
she wants to gauge your status das all.

>>34981809
you dont really have a choice tho.
If you are above certain test level, you wont be allowed to give up by your system.

its easier to count the good things and forget the bad ones

Also, you do get better at cold reading women and gauging them as personalities, before you over invest. After a while you dont really waste time on duds.

Looks are not that important but for real. Ive seen more hot girls with ugly dudes than 10/10 couples.

>>34981883
dont waste so much time thinking how people percieve you. Do your best and just talk to them. I could tell you unnumbered times I went out to meet women and one would react with recoil and disgust and another with smile and blushing.
There is no "you" outside of you.
You define who you are. And people will judge you according to their preconceptions that stem from their previous experiences.
Literally pointless to think about it.

A lot of the guys come here to get convinced to give up or not give up. its a hellish place to be mindset wise. Because only small percentage of people can truly give up. Usually low test, low horniness and overall fucked up mentally. But they wont ask for "should I give up?".
If you aint like that you only have one option, and that is to fight until you win or die.
There is something glorious in that. Why not just accept it and roll with it.

After you get out of the dry spell, you forget about the lossess quickly and the world is your best friend like nothing happened.

Why even waste time on dilly dallying. Just go for it and dont stop. YOu got something better to do?

In animal kingdom partner finding is literally priority. Only humans have been brainwashed to do other stupid shit that is literally meaningless.

Yes money too after certain point.

>>34982846
sadly das what happens when you try to shit where you eat.

Dont worry. Play outside work.

Most jobs everywhere are satturated with women. I genuinely wonder where did men go? Like for real.

I work in healthcare and its 85% women and girlboss drama with very low empathy.
In law its similar.

You only see dudes in some rando jobs.

I think a large amount of white men are leaving EU for other countries.
Its not reported tho but I see it by the average when I go out.
Simply lacking dudes out of education. Schools are like 50-50 but after Uni age, its almost everywhere women and much less men.

>>34988692
>you dont really have a choice tho.
>If you are above certain test level, you wont be allowed to give up by your system.

wtf is this cuck yapping about - the system leaves men behind it doens't give a fuck about any one mans problems no matter how they "test."

>>34982846
its on purpose bro, girls like that (toxic) will fiddle their pussy thinking how they screwed up your mojo forever with their actions.

You simply cannot allow yourself to be defeated unless you legit drop and die.

After you decide that, life becomes easier. Simply refuse to submit.

Win or die on the Path towards your goals. But dont give up.

What else is life for but not for a chance to make it?

It would be stupid if you thought you were promised anything but a shot. And unfair at that.

But imo that makes it all the more sweet when you do make it.

>>34988329
sounds good

you show her your cat and she shows you hers.

win win

have fun

>>34988692
>LARPing animal kingdom wisdom
>attempts to give human wisdom

absolutely laughable. Many high T men give up on woman- we live in an age in which that is an increasingly logical choice. You get good enough with your hand and the mind begins to accept it. Humans are supposed to be into much more than reproducing anyway. Is there more to life than reproducing? According to the majority of plebs like you no, which makes it so, which is why if a man makes the logical choice to opt out, we don't owe you a god damn thing.

>>34988521
post pics then instead of typing some retarded story.

>>34988711
>he gave up on getting women
>goes in a thread on getting women
>sees encouraging content
>mad about it

If thats not a retard, surely nobody is

And you are low T absolutely. T would never let you give up. You either have low total levels or low receptors.

Just the way you think you are logical but fail basic logic test by being present in thread shows you are far too emotional for a sane levels man.

Its not a crime. You would be a great guard of the Harem in ancient times.

>>34988692
>Usually low test, low horniness and overall fucked up mentally.

Low hornieness for a man is a good thing. This idea that men should be slaying pussy is literally just as retarded as a feminist saying women should sleep around. The more partners you fuck and the more you base the relationship around sex the harder it is to pair bond with others. You don't ever see chads have stable or good relationships when they are older when you actually need someone to care for you.

>>34988692
your whole argument rests upon a false premise
all of this
>You define who you are. And people will judge you according to their preconceptions that stem from their previous experiences.

this is totally false, and dangerous even, because you do not live in your mindset
you live in a society where you interact with other people and your own wellbeing (both physical and mental) rests upon how these people percieve you

you may not like it but it is wholehartedly true
one cannot survive alone unless he is some kind of Tad Kaczynski freak living alone in the woods

and your treatment by other people ALWAYS leaves an impact on your mental health and self esteem.
regardless of how much copium of “you are worth as much as you deem yourself to be worth”

it doesn’t work like that

>Yes money too after certain point.
yes, we call it betabuxx
it is not anything real, but if you are low iq enough or have stronger cope reflexes whatever floats your boat
I myself would be unable to accept being seen as a provider option (even if I had the money, which currently I don’t lol)

>>34988728
you should kill yourself if you cannot take care of yourself as a man.

Simple as.

Straight to Valhalla.

>>34988729
you are a small circle and I am a big circle. You cannot comprehend my words even if they are same language. You lack life stressors, experiences, thinking, possibly natural inclinations and capabilities to understand me. Words do not grant frame of reference and meaning, automatically. So I cant help you see.

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>>34988727
He doesn't have low T. Low T is not a epidemic in the slightest.

He's just generally a doomer who has no real intentions of bettering himself.

>>34988729
>I don't control anything other people do!
>Nothing I do is my fault!
>I'm the victim!

Why The Dating Crisis Is Just Natural Selection
>https://youtu.be/mefGxK10bWQ?si=WKol6cJojQ9mBqdx
>How Being a Victim Ruined Your Life
https://youtu.be/ddJP4HrKBSw?si=k_jOorEkqphk5UlY
>You're Stuck Because You Refuse to Grow Up
https://youtu.be/2Z3RcXlNaMw?si=0I5DkPeIRIBArWLX
>You're Boring Because You're Afraid To Change
https://youtu.be/X-ot9682-1w?si=C-rGBMXNwZeO4mfX
>Are You a "Deep Thinker" Or Just Narcissistic?
https://youtu.be/4ctkBMCGCyo?si=b0wlW9vDJOHwHbL9
>The Worst Red Flags I’ve Seen As A Therapist

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>>34988738
>Straight to Valhalla.

This is the most cringe shit I have ever seen in these threads.

>>34988744
cringe is the sauce baby, you just dont know it

Also sending this ; ) to girlboss reading this

>>34988741
I didn’t say none of that nigger
how fucking low IQ you have yo be to derive
>nothing I do is my fault
from
>the way others percieve you actually matters


kill yourself at your earliest opportunity

kinda insane how possessive women get when you're attractive

Anyone who got a woman's number or seduced her, how did the conversation go? I want to flirt better and I want to know how it should go. I can only master things by seeing them happen.

>>34988329
>>34988710
That's what I have in mind, but I mean, isn't it too early to invite her to my house on first date?
I'm a bit rusty since I've been on a 8 year relationship that ended December 2024 and haven't been "dating" since than.
And there is an age gap, she's 22 I'm 32, if that matters.

>>34989026
I met her from class and we talked for a few months. Then we went to a Halloween party, I didn't know most the people so I just stayed around her the whole time but I just kept up the energy and being open to meeting new people and being myself, flaws in all.

We then went back to my house for an after party and we just started talking about emotional stuff and we ended up falling asleep on the couch together. We woke up early and I just kind of "poked" her to see if it was ok to cuddle and then we ended up cuddling on the couch till late morning.

If you need some more tips watch some of these.

>Flirting Kinda Sucks, Actually.
https://youtu.be/nFY50H8nb5E?si=MklotmldIQ9CCZBG
>How to Approach Women and Not be Creepy
https://youtu.be/d7BGKU7fYp4?si=tSOvfGM3HkfQpIRI
>When Flirting Becomes Creepy…
https://youtu.be/9kJu2P51TF0?si=_6mgqnYkMOEKbGe_
>The Secret Reason Why Women Reject You
https://youtu.be/Uu2vnc7nrlY?si=8ZqSwxrzx4ovqBbj.

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Dude fuck your "don't be expressive don't use emojis" horeshit this girl told afterwards that I sounded like a serial killer over text and that she was thinking I was gonna kidnap her and kill her or something + I did not sound like myself because I was trying not to be expressive. Granted she's goofy for thinking that I'd actually do that but that's just how bad it sounds to just be trying to cool your way through text
Fuck all of you I'm gonna use emojis and if the girl doesn't like it then fuck her too what is this miserable shit

How do I adopt an abundance mentality even when it's completely untrue?

I have finally taken the tinder pill again after a million attempts and deeming it bullshit, which it is. Anyway, I had matches with decentish girls the first week which went nowhere obviously because they'll just reply back to you once anyway then just fuck around with single words after anyway, but now it's just recycling women I've already went through. How did I go through the whole roster of women in my mid-size city? I have a 10 year age window I'm looking at. It says I have 13 likes, I know I matched with almost 7 women since I began last week.
I get a "reward" in a couple days.

I've regretted every date I got from dating apps by the way, it was always a "ehh I guess I'll go, pretty sure she's abusing the fat girl angle" and then finding out, slampigging it and never called her again type deal. I'd never find the kinds of girls I'd actually take seriously there, they would never swipe on me. Like if I saw any girls in the caliber of my exes on there, they would skip my profile.

>>34989566
That was my experience as well. Every girl I've been with meeting irl has been way hotter than any girl I met on an app. Think most guys go through that.

The phrase in the English language that I hate the most has to be “It just happened” in the context of sex etc
Ok nigger but HOW did it just happen

It is highly important for you to see beyond a woman's aggression at not only her human side but how logical and practical she is trying to help you.

>>34989723
women aren’t human idiot

>>34989687
>Hanging out with girl at yours or her place
>Normal activity whatever
>Quiet, chill moment pops up
>Eye contact
>Connection already established
>Go for a kiss or propose sex
It's not that complicated. The "how" is as simple as actually asking or going for it. Like .00001% of women are going to offer it on a plate for you to fuck her.

The dream is to have 2-3 FWBs and keep dating until you find your wife. I have one but her schedule is fucked if I had 2-3 I could get pussy every night and only date the girls I think I would actually marry. The ideal life

>>34989687
let me guess, you fucking love science
if everything has to be defined/explained to you, you will never be able to have a conversation with a woman.

>>34989312
The irony that the guy teaching how to approach women without being creepy is Indian.

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>>34990481
>tfw you spent all those years making fun of jeets for being sex pests.
>Only to have one make the most sense when it comes to women.

>>34975480
Kek I’m a WFH wagie with an online side hustle so the only places I go out consistently are coffee shops. The social activities I partake in are mostly just drinking out with my friends. I go to bars and warehouse raves in LA but I don’t know if I want a gal there. The raves are definitely full of antisocial assholes and bitches for sure. Is my best shot to just cold approach at the cafes I work at?
Met my ex on hinge, but there’s no way I’m doing that again

>>34989312
Sounds like you just enjoyed yourself and hung out with her at the party, sweet. You went back home with her, talked about some deeper stuff, and then... how'd the rest go? I want to know how to get her to be intimate with me. Poking her to test her response makes sense. You already knew her, and it worked. That makes sense.

It's kind of hard when you just meet her. I've got to make her feel safe with me and interested.

>>34990021
Not that Anon, but I get it! I do something with a girl, and we both stop and our eyes meet. Then I make my move. I think that's how it happens. Thanks!

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>>34990872

Besides lookmaxxing, is there anything I can do to increase a girl’s attraction to me? Like through texting or what I post on social media?

>lose 100lbs
>get to about 19-20% bf
>start working out, feel better about myself, but still 0 luck or interactions with girls
>try to diet again, aim for 12-15%
>can't lose a gram to save my fucking life

I did it before, I should know what it takes.. do I just not want it enough? Do I implicitly know that even if I get visible abs girls won't give a shit about me?
I should probably go to therapy but I don't really trust it, and it's way too expensive, what do

>>34991717
being lean makes a huge difference anon

>>34991733
Why is it so much harder to lose these last 10 or so lbs?
I'm seriously thinking getting grey market glp1s (I'm not overweight so my doc won't prescribe them)

>>34991640
If they seem asexual around you its because you're seen as unattractive. They become whores in the presence of the right guy, I've seen it myself. Used to work as a bartender for a while, the behavior I've seen was enough to blackpill me for life. Even the shy, mousy ones become whores that grope and grind. Those same girls act like royalty in the presence of their beta male friends and they even get offended and disgusted if anything related to sex comes out of the mouth of a man they don't find attractive. If a girl is ever acting appalled at the mention of women even so much as having a libido, its because the man that's even so much as going into that topic without being attractive, is deemed as a creep instantly. They will try to shame you into going back where you belong in their imagined hierarchy. They don't want ugly men seeing them as the whores that they know they are, especially in friend groups. If the ugly ones found out the girls were giving ass to their attractive male friends, that could potentially open them up to approaches from those same betabuxx friendzoned guys and they couldn't explain away the dynamic without social incrimination.

>>34991816
for me it was my love handles, they feel like solid fat probably from years of hardening

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>>34991857

>>34991857
>>34991870
so is "the game" just a bunch of lies? an attractive guy can say whatever and still get pussy?

>>34991872
yeah
pretty much
I mean maybe some game exists like 5% of the equation but it is mostly about looks anyways

also notice how these “game” and “frame” proponents never really elaborate on what this game and frame even is

this is a deliberate move
they keep it undefined as a retroactive trick to explain basically every possible outcome making

their whole theory is unfalsifiable by nature

>ohhh you got rejected
>you obviously didn’t game enough/held a weak frame
>ohhh she agreed to go out with you
>well done, you held a strong frame/you gamed her well

and so on, and so on
wholeheartedly unfalsifiable

>>34991872
>>34991886
The number of guys who can say anything and get laid is like .01%. For most (this means you) looks are what get you in the door, everything else is where you seal the deal. Exceptionally few men are good looking enough to negate a dogshit personality.

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>>34991640
One of the biggest things women look for in a man is growth. Women do not want a man that looks like he has nothing going on in his life or has stagnated. They want a boyfriend who actually does things, both for others and himself. It honestly doesn't matter to much what you do. A lot of incels and trolls will make fun of you for joining a swing dancing class or picking up a "gay" hobby like knitting, but literally any sort of skill that you want to improve on and make an effort at will make you look good and that you don't sit around your house all day moping and doing nothing. The more active hobbies are more attractive, but less active hobbies that are creative are still good if you continue to improve on those skills or just keep up doing them for fun.

>>34988724
nigger i dont want to dox my friend, why would i do that on a mongolian recipe sharing forum message board

>>34989341
based use emojis

I don't know, people. What do I do? I'm at an event with so many people, and I know that they are strangers, but one woman I met was nice, I'm not upset (just a bit tired), but she seemed kind of quick to go. Maybe she was busy, but that seems to be a ton of them. In fact, most girls just say "yeah" or "mm-hmm" when I try saying anything. I never get any chemistry, so I don't get to actually practice flirting or escalating. Do I keep approaching and just find her or what? I'm headed to a party soon, so there's that too.

I don't understand. How does attraction even happen within the first conversation with a woman? How do I make her attracted to me when we just met? I introduce myself, chat and tease her, and she magically gets attracted? How does it work?

I'm supposed to talk her as if I have other options, which I don't. To make good convo, I have to approach and talk normally with a bit of teasing mixed in, but how does it happen? It's only happened three times to me within 5 years. I need to know how my first convo with her is even doing anything.

>underage girls on the train, bus, stores etc makes it painfully obvious when they're into me
>older women too
>invisible by own bracket
This is a unique hell

She told me I am "a rare good man she found". What are the implications? Should I take care of something?

>>34992832
>How does attraction even happen within the first conversation with a woman?

It doesn't. It takes time. Stop falling for the redpill memes about how women are suppose to be instantly attracted to you. If anything women who are see you as an easy target to exploit.

>>34992837
Are you a millennial? There's something uniquely broken about millennial women. Don't go too far out of your age range (obviously follow the law) but the millennial debuff is worse than the age gap debuff.
>>34993058
You passed some test but she's got misandrist tendencies.
She literally called you "one of the good ones" dude.

>>34993101
That's what I've been thinking! Redpill BS sucks because it says that I can make attraction just happen within the first convo or something. Instinctively, it feels as if I should introduce myself, establish some connection and maybe get her socials platonically at first, and then escalate before being friendzoned.

>>34975480
How do I get women to leave me alone in mmos? Should I be as toxicity masculine as possible? Talk without a filter?

>>34993204
>maybe get her socials platonically at first, and then escalate before being friendzoned.
This is literally the worst way to do this and makes you look like a chicken.
Physical attraction IS instant. Seduction is long term. Neither one involves "maybe getting her socials platonically".

>>34993298
Then how the fuck am I supposed to do it? Every time I think I've figured it out, I just end up with a shitty idea of how to do it.

Yeah, first I have to be smooth and try cold approaching since platonic is bad. Makes sense. Oh? Now it's shit? Okay, what now? Attraction doesn't come at first, it comes... when?

I've been at it for 3 months, and nothing. What the fuck is it? I'm tired. I'm so tired.

I can't even escalate because I never even get anything other than one word of a response? Is my appearance THAT bad?

I appear meak, shy, and boring so much. I am trying to change that. Women shouldn't be my happiness, I get that, but fuck, it's still frustrating being unattractive. Others do 1% of what I do, and get 5 numbers. I've had the shittiest day today. Sorry if I am rude now, but I am running out of ideas.

>>34993303
3 months lol.
You're mad that I won't give you the recipe, when there is no recipe. There is no "I'm cold approaching" "I'm being platonic" "This is when attraction hits".
There is no "figured it out" because every situation and every woman is different. You build social skills and improvise.

>>34993198
Is 33 millennial? I can never remember

>>34993316
Okay... okay. There's no "way." Fine. Every woman is different. If the answer is just "keep trying," fine. I'm going to keep trying anyway.

Oh, and yeah, 3 months. I went from being completely afraid of approaching to approaching and failing. I might have made one interested, but we couldn't meet. I've always been really bad at everything, so it'll take me years.

Being a nice guy is one thing, but being able to be decent when it runs deep is another. You and your girlfriend have to be that for one and another, and if not it ain't worth it.

Life must be so nice for those who are loveable

>>34982123
>dont be fat
And do what? Harass them on the street?

>>34993783
the truth is, if you are lean and attractive women will literally try to bag you on the street. when i was at my physical peak i was still a shut in but even female cashiers and shopkeepers i had to forcibly interact with would flirt with me to the degree an autistic fuck like me could notice it.

>>34993808
>cashiers and shopkeepers i had to forcibly interact with would flirt with me

son… they are payed to do so

>>34993813
nah anon you have no idea how easy attractive men have it. i was also fat my whole life and people treat you like shit.

>>34993814
dude I am probably more blackpilled/lookspilled than you are

but cashiers “flirting” with you is not a sign of them being interested

at most, you USED TO be like super sub5 and they were disgusted with you

and now you are probably just a normie

I’m going to visit her at work to ask her out. How can I build attraction and create some romantic tension while I’m there? things like touching her waist or kissing her on the cheek?

>>34994475
Showing up at her work is stalker tier behavior. Plus, she can’t leave. Just call her. If you haven’t even been out on a date yet why the fuck would you touch and kiss her?
Women let you know when touching is appropriate by touching you first.

Please put Coach Corey Wayne in the OP. Apply what he teaches and you WILL see the results.
https://youtu.be/DWVM5X42yHE

>>34994714
does he have videos on approach anxiety?

>she:"hey, how are you?"
>Me:"I am fine, how about you?"
>She:"great also. Where are you from?"
>Me:"I am from X and you?"
>She:"I am from Y. Do you know my city?"
>Me:"very little, but I was there once."
>She:"great, we can explore the city together haha"
>Me:"haha. So tell me more about you."
>Then she blocks me

What did I do wrong?

>>34994796
u're ugly

>>34994796
They are not on the apps to chat retard. They want to get fucked asap

>>34994796
Nigger youre sending her the EXACT same message other 200 fucking dudes are sending her.

>>34990129
> had 2-3 I could get pussy every night and only date the girls I think I would actually marry.
Seeing two women at the same is already a hassle, plus FwB is the hardest to get, it's actually easier to get a real Gf

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>>34975480
>chat up a girl
>she's really excited to see me
>we meet, I'm somewhat disappointed
>go radio silent for two days, then reach out because why the hell not
>she thinks I've rejected her, is mad with me
>chat her up some more, she responds, but she's cross with me
Why do I even bother

>>34994871
>>34994893
What was I supposed to say? I was polite and I tried to make a small talk

>>34994988
>great, we can explore the city together haha
>Sounds good. Wanna meet up Friday?

>>34995100
Shouldn't I understand her a little more in a conversation before meeting up?

>>34995102
That's what the date is for retard.

>>34995212
Wouldn't I sound to creepy for taking thing that fast?

>>34995363
Don't be too obvious but don't be so fucking boring, you want to get their attention not their life history.
The faster it moves the faster you can move on if it doesn't work.

Got a date tomorrow we're going out for drinks, any tips? Should I plan other activities?

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Am I crazy for wanting to cancel a date after getting a response after 14 hours saying sorry I was busy I just saw your message and when calling they don't pick up

>>34994714
found a pdf of his book and it seems very boomerish

>>34995843
First date? Keep it simple, maybe go to another place too

There is this co-worker I became interested in, let's call her Bell. I've only been at the job for 2 months. We only exchanged friendly Hi's. About a month go I asked her and another girl on the way to our cars if I seemed unapproachable. Bell laughed and said no, she was just shy.

Fast forward about a week and she randomly yelled "Hi!" to me while knowing I was walking behind her. I said "Hi!" back and we both laughed. Followed up with, "See, that wasn't so hard, right? You're not that shy." She responded saying, "I am but I also like to bully people." We laugh and that was pretty much it.

From that point on it was back to saying Hi. A few weeks ago I tried to start some convos with her because she PC games but each time she just scurried away from the convo. Literally lasted like 10-15s each.

Yesterday I said fuck it, and when I happened to run into her, I asked her out.

M: Yo Bell
H: Whats up?
M: I know we haven't talked much but would you be down to go out for boba sometime?
H: Sure... When?
M: Whenever we are both off work
H: Hmm.... ok!
M: Bet. Let me grab your number
H: Ok *inserts number*

Hour after we closed I just texted her asking when she'd be off next.

She never replied.
We worked together again today and there was just some awkward tension.

Towards the end of our shift, I just asked her in a sarcastic & humorous tone w/ a smirk, "So... you're not gonna reply to me?"
She said, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to"
Then she just abruptly walked away.

I'm fine with being rejected but it makes it a lot easier if you just say no thank you.
Keep in mind, all the other women in the store are very open to talking to and engaging with me.
Bell does talk to other guys occasionally but mostly just with the other girls. But it feels like I'm the only one who she is incredibly short with. I've literally done nothing to make her feel uncomfortable.

I don't get her actions before or after.

>when they start to realize you have no friends

>>34992832
>How does attraction even happen within the first conversation with a woman?
It only happens if you're funny and charismatic which can't be taught. Those guys are able to make them laugh immediately and they're able to feel comfortable and then attracted.

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Don't be like me, don't tell any straight woman you're interested in about your insecurities or your depressive episodes. That's what friends are for.

Is it bad to date a borderline girl?

>>34997923
All women are bpd whores, some just more than others

>>34997933
No like, she got a diagnosis from a psychiatrist.

>>34997943
And I'm telling you they're all crazy in their own way, if you can handle some bullshit and games then go for it, otherwise stay clear, don't expect every woman you meet to become your wife for 20 years

>>34997923
Yes. Because BPD is a personality disorder that is driven entirely by relationships and only shows up during social interactions with other people. Which means the second you date the BPD, the disorder goes into full swing the same way as fire erupts when throwing gasoline in it. The only time it's safe to date someone with BPD is when they no longer have it after putting it into remission

>>34997949
Bro shut the fuck up with the stupid exaggeration. You've never dated a BPD if you did you'd understand comparing them to all women is retarded. Your average Becky doesn't take a gun and press it to her head while screaming to deliberately get you to grovel and plead for her not to kill herself just so she can get a sick pleasure from the attention.

>>34997963
>Your average Becky doesn't take a gun and press it to her head while screaming to deliberately get you to grovel and plead for her not to kill herself just so she can get a sick pleasure from the attention.
Either I've only dated BPDemons or most women are fucked up mentally, yes.

>>34997967
You've only dated BPDemons which is what typically happens when you date your first one, you're statistically more likely to date another and another because the fucked up experience imprints in you and you will unconsciously seek to recreate it. You develop a fatal attraction towards them and they keep sniffing you out because BPDs, like any other sociopathic adjacent disorder, are really fucking good at spotting who the easy marks are

>>34997970
jesus christ, fuck dating

>>34997963
How normal is BPD women threaten to kill herself for not getting your attention?

>>34997972
You gotta break up with that 'type' nigga. Exorcise the she-bitch from your soul or your mind. What you do is you identify where you learned it was okay to parent a fucking grown woman and cater to her whims and play as her emotional butler to soothe her broken unhinged heart and then you realize that BPD chicks are just a rerun of the same pattern you got stuck in in repeat and you stop being attracted to them and you stop attracting them to you.

It's like babbies first great suffering filter. You win it by telling them 'no I don't want to date you/fuck you'

>>34997974
Pretty normal occurrence. But it starts off slow and builds up to it. First they'll deliberately ghost or go on random silence, then they get angry at you for not checking in and closing the distance they themselves created. Next up is the jealousy jabs, they'll deliberately start making random new friends out of nowhere, predominantly male friends. She will then proceed to stab your boundaries and comfort zones by mentioning how much she thinks the other guy(s) are so funny and charming and cool to your face. She will then either spend all your fucking money in a binge spend or she will just outright start cheating. If she detects your going cold she will initiate arguments out of nowhere and then fuck your brains out. This will continue until you figure out that your minds wheels are coming off and she's poison, then the suicidal gestures start

>>34998006
She seems honestly a very sweet girl on first look. We had a nice conversation together and even some light flirting. When the Bpd kicks in and what it looks like?

Drunk black lady just called me dark skinned and it was the greatest compliment ever

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After I left this morning I made her bed and my bowl from the night before was in the sink so I unloaded her dishwasher and she really liked it. Small stuff can go a long way.

>>34993058
>She told me I am "a rare good man she found". What are the implications? Should I take care of something?
It means you're a good friend and that's all.

>>34997399
Yeah I did that once, never again.

>>34997399
The last time I did I wasn't even in a state where I could keep things in. I was coerced into that shit. And my "friend" made quite sure I wouldn't date this girl by telling her when I asked her out "dumbass, he's not looking to fuck you, he just wants to hang out".
And now everytime she talks to me she says "anooon download Tinder". Fucking faggots.

>>34998618
Shut your mouth, patrick

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>>34994796
You are a rude POS, who humiliated her.
Like what the fuck?
>She:"great, we can explore the city together haha"
>Me:"haha. So tell me more about you."
Poor girl. She shot her shot and you just verbally crushed her. You should be nicer to girls next time!

>get introduced to cute girl in an event
>we talk a little bit and exchange numbers, she looks very interested in our convo. lots of things in common
>flirt a little bit and ask her out. we agree to meet one day after work
>'you mean you want to get to know me in a friendly way, right?'
this shit happens way too often to me. I feel completely defeated. I probably should still go meet her, but this is so annoying. I'm trying to meet women irl but no one ever shows mutual interest even if we do have shit in common.

>>34999319
Are you dense or is this bait? She’s agreed to meet you already, let it be what it is. Plus women are friends with other women so how do you think you become friends with other women?

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>>34979960
Take the doll pill and stop suffering

Here begins /SGWAG/: STOP GIVING WOMEN ATTENTION

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>everyone tells me I should learn how to talk to strangers before trying to approach women
>decide to fix my introversion before trying to become a cold approach PUA chad
>go to mall
>compliment guy's shoes outside a store
>tells me to get off his dick
>shake it off after a while and compliment woman's hair
>she literally stops, looks at me blankly, then turns exactly 180 degrees and walks away from me in the opposite direction she was going without a word
>go home and eat cold pizza

Why are people like this bros, how am I supposed to keep doing this forever until I meet the one other person in my city who isn't hostile towards strangers

>>35000951
It's the area you are in. Hostility is probably common there and people try to defend themselves as such.

Okay everyone, I want you to avoid these two types of women that are extremes.

One extreme is a woman who is too traditionalist to the point of where you have to essentially be asexual and aromantic around her. This type is gonna lead to a life that is not fun and will just demand you to work and slave until you die working some desk or blue collar job you hate.

The other extreme is a woman who demands an open relationship and will instantly cheat on you given the chance. You are just someone whose giving her a free hotel room while she brings in men and you just sit there confused and you can only have the relationship if she lives this life.

The perfect balance: a girl who you can have a drink with at a bar, tells you you can hang out with your friends only when you are done taking care of your son and the chores, and for the love of God the woman has sex with you passionately.

Ideas for a second date?

>>35002096
Yeah sure and have people be your chatgpt. Dude you got to rely on what you think is best and go from there. It sucks and it will be painful but it is necessary when dating.

TLDR; Confidently make it awkward if need be.

>>35001902
>avoid stuck up dead inside cunts
>avoid turbo whores that just love the cock carousel

Crazy insight mr tripfag, I could never know this if you didn't tell me, what else will you reveal with your infinite wisdom

Went on a date with a girl on Friday, then met her again last night. She's nice, but a little bit big. Really big boobs. Anyway, she wanted to ask me something about my Hinge profile so took out her app. She had 99 likes on it. With all due respect I like her, she's good looking, but obiously on the plus side, but 99 likes. I actually couldn't fucking believe it. I asked her how did I slip through the cracks out of the other 99 likes and she didn't really have an answer for me. I'm just an average looking dude.

I get matches on Hinge myself kinda regularly, but I've probably had 99 matches+likes total in my entire time on the app.

Also there's a logistics question to this. She just moved back to the country literally a few days before we matched. Hinge works like you can only see one persons like at a time, unless you have premium which case you can see through your likes.

So either she has premium. Or she matched with me last weekend, then got 99 likes between then and Friday evening. We don't live in a big city either.

>>35002153
The male ti female Ratio must be like 200 to 1 and a lot of men just leaves like to everyone, hardly surprising women are swamped.
I also despise the idea that I might have a chance with a girl but she might also be sleeping around while we're dating until she's sure she likes me.

whats the tldr for these threads? give me a qrd

I applied to volunteer at two different places three days ago to get out of the house and meet women, but I still haven’t heard back from either of them.

>>35002234
looksmaxxing is the only way, everything else is cope

>>34993058
>What are the implications?
You should start talking to other women.
If she doesn't sleep with you by Halloween cut contact entirely.
There's two key phrases.

1) "You're one of/a good guy". This is only a good thing if you're both minors. A single day past the age of majority and it's time to begin your exit.
2) You're mature. This is only a good thing if uttered after you're already in a relationship. Otherwise it means you're a nonentity. Start committing crime or pick up a dangerous hobby to fix it.

>>35002230
I'm kinda similar in that I will have multiple girls going at once on the apps. It's just absolutely a volume thing. The amount of girls you talk to, get off the app, agree a date, have a good first date, have a 2nd date. It's like funnel, you're losing so many each step of it, that you need to just try a lot of girls.

I would have been massively massively against it years ago. But I think for my own mental health, talking to one girl and waiting for them to come back is a bad thing, I just sit there anxious until they do. When you have some options, you can be much more calm with all of them.

>>35002333
Well yeah I think it's normal to keep browsing people and optimize by checking out several potential partners at once, I'm specifically talking about hookups. Nothing's stopping a girl from thinking "well this guy is in the bag gonna fuck as much as I can before he asks me to be his gf".

>>34993519
lmao, you're 3 months into this, and you're already this butthurt about it? Probably because you have deeper issues anyway. I didn't get laid until 6 months later, and then it was one after another in relatively short succession. You don't stop at the first lay and "that's your skillset now". You don't get bitter, just because you have to catch up to such a huge deficit. It takes time, don't give up, don't become better. The world, and women in particular, are in a shit state right now, but what's the alterantive?

Do you train years to particpate in the olympics and get a gold medal, just to quit at your first gold medal? No, this is literally your peak, and there's other people hungry for gold, too. This is the point you keep going and improving and getting more gold.

>>35002613
>don't become better
don't become bitter obviously

I’d like a cute girl to dress up like one of those instagram fitness influencers - like the chunky sneaks / leggings / socks etc - and suck my dick.

Is this a mild ask for someone who’s into you?

How do you even meet women without looking like a tryhard

>>35002613
>but what's the alterantive?
staying at home

>>35002282
that much is obvious but what about the years of walls of text? can anything else be concluded from them?

i aint sure what to say other than almost in my 30s and still didnt get a girl around not even kissed or hangout as a normal friend idk what is wrong with me if it because im so fucking introvereted and i have no idea what im supposed to do as i cant break my introverted character suddently and be around girls and it isn't excluded to girls only even though im straight but i dont even have a gang of friend like male ones
all i can say is that im a fucking loser

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Going to my first ever speed dating event in a few weeks. I know so little about all of this, I don't even know what I don't know
If some of you have experience with speed dating, drop some random general advice and I will be grateful. Esoteric stuff is welcome at that point
I know I should be specific but I don't even know how those events usually play out so I want to start small

>>35003556
Treat it as a learning experience where your goal is not to get laid, but just learn how to do better at speed dating.
Then go again next time and use what you learned.
Repeat until you have success.

>>35003556
Ask all the women detailed questions about their boobs. Like how much they sag, what color the nipples are, how big the nipples are.

>>35003556
I’ve been to 3 of these. Kind of. There’s a thing in my city once a month that the hosts set up where you basically meet a bunch of other single people and they have speed dating games but you can also chill and bop around and talk to everyone too.
First time I went, I talked with randos for 20 minutes until I met this young girl who I hit it off with. We made out in my car and she definitely wanted to suck my dick but we ended up going back inside.
Second one I met this other girl who seemed cool but randomly freaked out after I didn’t text her back for a few hours. Third one was chill and I didn’t try and flirt with anyone just went to socialize.

Just take everything as an experience.
Talk to everyone. Be friendly. Ask lots of questions. Don’t be too nervous. Most everyone there is a little nervous.
Everytime I went to those I’d literally ask people if they were nervous before they came and the girls always say yes. So don’t feel weird about being shy or whatever.
Do your best to be yourself and try not to worry about outcomes.

>>35003384
I'd say that anything that improves your life also improves your chances with girls. So basically follow any boring but true self improovement advice:
>get a job you like that gives you some financial flexibility
>get exercise several times a week, preferably both aerobic and anaerobic
>learn the cognitive distortions well so you can catch yourself when you do them
>find some hobbies/interests you like, try several
>learn conversation skills
>learn human nature and psychology
>travel
That's just off the top of my head.

Was giving a girl oral last night. Usually I almost completely stick to the clit with great success, but this time I tried putting my tongue as far as I could into her pussy. I figured that was just for me since of course my tongue can't get very far in, not near as much as my fingers or dick, but she responded very well to it. I confirmed with her later than she did really like it. So just wanted to drop that insight here.

>>35003757
suck up all that used cum she'd had in there before you.

>>35002234
just be yourself if you want a wife, lie if you want one night stands. everything else is cope

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How do i talk to a girl at Uni?
we sat together (although it was probably because the room was kinda full), laughed at stupid stuff together a few times, some people left class and she asked me if i would stay, i just said "yeah haha" and spent the rest of the class sitting with her, maybe she wanted to talk to me? my sister told me "women don't just ask you stuff if they're not interested".
Next class i was planning on sitting with her, but, isn't it weird if the classroom is not full? i don't even know her name, my plan was to ask her how she studies (she got an A and i got a B, we both study compsci).
The thing is i get really nervous and can't talk sometimes, people think "it's cute" because i'm good looking, i even ended up writing something i couldn't say to her and she said "don't worry hehe"

How do I get women irl, specifically at bars or at local shows/concerts? Yes I am tall, handsome, young, and make a lot of money (especially for my age and where I'm located). What's next? I have a personality, some hobbies, and I'm funny so I don't know what I'm missing

>>35004756
no secret to it
simply trial and error based on your own experience
you go out, you see what works for you, you try different things and get better

your success is directly correlated with how good you are at noticing what is actually happening in front of you
then correcting your behavior or variables

tldr: just go out more

>>35004938
I see. I have been going out more and believe it or not, I'd say I get approached by a woman half the time I go out. The problem is that they're never women I'm interested in. The primary bar I go to (which is also the hub for women and people in general that I'd like to talk to) has the indoor section which has the bar and a few tables, and then the outdoor patio which has a bunch of benches, people standing around, etc. I've gotten the most approaches being at the bar but I can't really see anything going on "in front of me" so-to-speak because it's all happening behind me. The outside area has lots of people in it but they're usually in groups and that freaks me out

Another thing: when should I approach? Sometimes a woman will be in proximity to me, move away for a sec, and then come back but she's with two dudes. Are they friends? Can I talk to her without it being weird? When a woman is alone, how do I talk to her without coming off as a creep? The ones that are alone always look super unapproachable in the face

>>35002234
the qrd is more meta than the replies you got said.
the qrd is that the world is not a just place and you can do everything right, do all the self improvement in the world, and there is still a very real possibility that you end up a lonely virgin by the end of it.

so the real qrd is - if you are in these threads you are not the kind of man who gets women to fall into his lap while doing nothing. so if you want any semblance of a chance you have to actively pursue women and put in as mush effort as possible in presenting yourself in the best possible light to them. but always keep in mind that your efforts might never bear fruit.

>>35005006
only thing that matters is getting success
so, anything that helps you achieve it should be done
being a dick ignoring some dude whose with a girl so you get the attention of the girl? do it

see a girl who's by herself? make a quick comment and smile
judge her receptiveness and continue if she's receptive

the trick is to get many interactions with women, and then understanding when a girl is being receptive to you in that specific moment
if it's not obvious before interacting, try anyway until you have better judgement of when it's good and not good to approach

girls with guys you simply talk to the group and after one simple topic you begin talking to the girl
also everything mystery talks about in his videos is 100% spot on when it comes to night game
you want to start conversations as if you are about to leave it at any moment
and once you notice they've hooked is when you can join the group

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how do you cope when life puts extreme limits how often you get to talk to a girl that seems to like you?
There is this meek and shy girl that obviously enjoys my attention whenever she gets it but I only get to see her for like 5 minutes a day, 3 days a week, and 4 days in a row weekly where I never see her at all, and the lack of talking time is KILLING ME.

the obvious answer is to just ask her out to make time, but as an attractive but former shy person myself I know how much of a jumpscare it is when someone does this to you and I don't want to scare her off because of how god damn shy she is. (and the way she always says "hi anon" in the quietest and softest voice possible is so sexy)

I am starting to lose sleep the torment is so bad

>>35005485
>lives in an age of free and instant global communication through text, pictures, audio and video calls
>extreme limits of how often you get to talk to someone
Sure anon, you're not asking her out because you're so considerate of *her* shyness

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>>35005570
but asking for a girl's number that you barely talk to is scary

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>>35005574
Regret hurts more than rejection

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>>35005570
>>35005578
but in all seriousness, she never initiates conversations with me after finding out i'm 10 years older than her (25f, 35m) so it's probably already over and she's just being nice. I'm waiting for her to start initiating again before I ask to trade numbers.

let the waiting game begin

>>35002282
Not quite anon. I'm finding out that if you can't looksmaxx you can laid-back-maxx.

The reason why women are more stern with you, but more loose with certain men, is that there is a stable connection between them. If there is no connection you're a background character like a store attendent politely showing her the cereal aisle at the groccery store.

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I can't take it much longer, bros

The likes, the matches, the ghosting, dates that led to nowhere, the expectations, the rejection. How can one power through all of this? I was ok being single for years and a few months of using the apps I feel lonelier than ever. That shit can't be healthy. What should I do? Go full psycho and focus on my career? Hit the gym 5x a week and finally get shredded?

I did it again
Was working at a coffee shop, and a woman took the table next to me. She wasn't as attractive as the last one, but she may have been interested in meeting me, maybe not, idk for sure. I didn't do anything though. It's hard to describe why. I don't feel any of the usual symptoms of anxiety or fear. But I do feel some kind of immense pressure that if I do initiate something, then I have to do it really well, or else. And I can't rise up to that kind of pressure, so I sit there in silence. Guess I'm just pathetic.

ugly anons, how often do women stutter ums and uhs behind a smile when they have to talk to you. is this a normal thing girls just do or am i hot?

>>35006849
I hug a girl everyday and sometimes she touches my chest. It seems like I'm hot to her, but then I notice she talks to some guys in a very passionate manner. I'm like a 6 out of 10 to her, but in order for me to truly be in her radar I have to be an 8 out of 10 where all those street smart guys are at. What makes it even more difficult is this street smart guy she loves is probably a hell of a lot more successful than what I could ever become. It's essentially in a dating game: David vs. Goliath.

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, do not rely on mixed signals. Rely on direct signals.

You don't really "get" women, I'm afraid. They either come to you naturally or you're a genetic deadend freak. Nobody has to consult anonymous image boards to figure out how to experience one of the most basic aspects of human existence.

>>35006505
Ah, you're close to a breaking point? It means you haven't gone far enough. I had a good couple meltys first before eventually stablizing. Lots of weight gain and loss in between, suicide thoughts, apathy, anger, depression. If anything, you should push faster to trigger a burnout, not cope and stop pushing. It feels good on the other side of that. You're fine being single, but you're also fine pursuing goals and chasing tail again.

>>35006946
>rely on direct signals
>ask her out
>has a boyfriend
>she escalates and keeps giving even more direct signals immediately after the rejection
thanks doc

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How to salvage this?

>>35007820
Send a detailed explanation of the meaning of "pitch a tent" with MS Paint diagrams

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How do I pick between two girls?
>average, rich girl that adores me, high energy
>above average, homely girl, introverted, sweet.
How do I pick? I have never been in an predicament like this.

Always remember that women are wild.

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>bros bail on metal concert last night
>see hot babe walk by, clearly alone at show which is unusual for women into metal
>after next band go find and chat her up
>shes laughing a bit and it doesnt seem forced, asks stuff about me too
>similar interests, music, muay thai, etc
>about to ask her for drink or number, headliner starts
>nice getting to know you anon, im gonna go up to the front
>literally runs off
Didnt see her on the way out, im dissappointed I waited too long to see if she was interested, but at least I know I can engage women. I guess if she was more into me she mightve said something, but who knows.

>>35007962
you can be in the early stages of dating with multiple girls at the same time.

>>35007962
>homely girl, introverted, sweet.
Thats a facade
>>35008834
Nta but how do you manage keeping interest from multiple women at the same time? Usually by the time i get one consistently interested they ask where we are going and want to date, so, how do you delay committing but still keep them around?

Listen you all, the most important thing you got to focus on with this dating thing is the side that makes you human not all that you are good at and not all your war stories, simply put the part of you that makes you human. You follow this advice you'll be lightyears ahead of most men.