How can I teach my cat to steal things?I could use the extra cash
>>5108093Put it back mittens
>>5108093Get a ferret instead. They're adept thieves. Plus ferts are cute.
>>5108163I imagine it’s more likely that your ferret would get stolen than anything else.
A better bet than a cat would be the following>befriend corvids with food>show them money in various forms (bills and coins)>make them associate food with money>they start bringing you money they find or steal from people>in return pay them in their favourite foods (peanuts or whatever, research it)>give them better and more food the more value a bill has that they bring>profit
>>5108269At this point just pay homeless guys to steal and leave the animals out of it
>>5108270it's way more fun to interact with birds and build up a symbiotic relationship with them than it is to interact with smelly, possibly violent and schizoid drug and alcohol addicts
>>5108269I agree, but it’s more that I want to foster some useful skills in my cat. He’s a bum
>>5108093If your Cat isn't black don't bother. For stealth reasons of course.
>>5108269one time i had a crack idea of making crow vending machines with peanuts where crows would have to use a little wooden disc the exact size of a quarter painted silver to solve a puzzle and release the jerky the fake quarter would be attacked to the machine with a chain and after a couple weeks youd takenoff the woden coin and wait for the crows to go find real ones to use
>>5108468My cats are quite adept at manufacturing poop.
>>5108093you're going to get it shot
>>5108500do amerikans really
>teach>cat
>>5108896cats are very smart creatures, I'll have you know.
