One day, Mario and Luigi were out on a glorious walk amid the city. The birds were chirping, the traffic was light, and all was well in the world. As the two mustachioed plumbers stopped at a nearby hotdog stand for a world famous "Giga Glizzy™, Luigi tragically slipped on a misplaced banana peel. He was quickly rushed to the hospital by ambulance, where he and Mario were informed that he's not likely to live much longer, as he was diagnosed with AIDS. Additionally, as neither one of them were covered by an insurance plan, nor did they have enough money to cover such expensive treatments, they were asked to leave. Suddenly, Mario flew into a rage, which resulted in the death of the Toad doctor that was on duty - He was tragically flung out of a nearby window.The next day, Mario enrolled at Brooklyn College where he diligently studied medical science, in a desperate bid against time to save Luigi and develop a cure to the immunodeficiency disease. Despite being an otherwise stellar student, Mario ingested some cannabis, likely as a form of stress relief, and was expelled from the institution. Enraged at this news, Mario vowed to push his professor out of the window, of the local hospital at which Luigi had been admitted, during a visit. This unfortunately resulted in this man's death as well. With this pesky (and likely Jewish) interloper out of the way, Mario was able to apply his knowledge and graduate with a degree.Shortly after, he snuck into the college's laboratory, where he worked tirelessly on a cure. Once this cure was synthesized, he rushed to the hospital, ready to save his brother's life. As he swung the doors open, he was halted by a police officer Toad, who was ordered to keep him off the premises, as a restraining order was filed by the staff there, pending an investigation into doctor Toad's death, and a general sense of malaise at his presence.
>>944839737Smoldering with anger, Mario took this officer by the hand and helped him observe the outside of the building, as seen from a four story free fall. Unfortunately, this officer passed away after making contact with a vintage 1957 Chevrolet Bel Air that was parked on the curb nearby. Mario then marched to his brother's room, where he revealed his cure for AIDS: it was none other than the piperidine opioid Fentanyl, in the form of a rather large suppository. In the end, and despite Mario's toils, Luigi elected to withdraw from administration of this life saving medication. Mario didn't take to this very kindly to this, of course.You know, reader, there is a very well known saying in Brooklyn, something along the lines of>heaven hath no fury like a woman scornedWell, all I can say is, whoever came up with that saying never met Mario.
