wojak rule 34

>>947890053
that video single handedly ostracized me from society forever.
please don't show this to anybody

>>947890160
ikr, pretty hot isn't it

>>947890053
i love this bitch, is there any more of her out there? Also I don't really have a best, too many good ones to choose from

>>947890160
you pooped a little during a video recorded orgasm and they ostracized you? That can't be all you did wrong

polishing just the head/glans in a forward motion with olive oil
felt so good it was almost painful
and instead of cumming i pissed
and every drop that passed through that high pressure stream felt like an entire orgasm unto itself
i almost passed out from the pleasure
it was brilliant, full bodied and again so intense it was verging on pain
never felt anything like it before or since
hit everything just right that time
kept going and shot massive ropes after too
slept like the dead that night

>>947890299
i also watched overwatch rule 34 in the middle of class. but it's that video they keep mentioning for some reason

When Vicky came out in those black leggings. Only time I ever came so hard I hit myself on the chin, laying on my back.

A two-hour wank sesh to Anna P while high

>>947890404
Oh so there was other evidence that you're a perv, and also of being a dummy for perving in class. Enjoy exile, tosser

I rescused a bit of my sister's poop from the toilet and fapped with it. Came buckets but I felt shame, guilt and revulsion even as the cum was erupting from my balls. Showered like seven times and still felt dirty, never done anything like that since.

The wank I did using pussy juice purchased from an e-slut as lube, while watching a video she filmed of herself collecting it in a vial.

It was a trancendental experience. Highly recommend.

>>947890522
hold up now. i only watched the overwatch pron with a friend. and besides, i was child in 2019 so that makes me not a pedophile.

>>947890668
sounds too dangerous, but otherwise fun
i mean how else can you not have sex but also catch std's?

>>947890053
the wank I'm going to have later watching the frogs pop out

Found a video of my sister masturbating for some guy she was having an affair with and found, and the time I got into my MIL's Gmail and found nudes and pictures with her vibrator in her pussy while using a smaller one on her clit. Luckiest finds ever.

1992, United Kingdom.
When I somehow (god knows how) managed to convince my then 17-year old girlfrend and her 14-year-old sister to both get topless and french kiss & grope each other's boobs while I jacked it and, very loudly and with a release of energy that almost crippled me, blasted my seed fucking EVERYWHERE.

Twice

deepfaking my sister's face intoi tentacle porn

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This thing. Holy. Fuck. It's got a vacuum and a rotating bit and I swear to God the light leaves my eyes and every drop of cum in my body dumps out. Hands free jerking off is elite.

>>947890053
the first wank after the first time I get a nude of a girl I know. It's happened a few times in my life. Whether its a hot girl at school, a close friend, or one of my friends' gfs/wives, the first time I get a nude of theirs the first wank afterwards is unrivaled

>>947890600
Post-nut clarity hits hard when doing something depraved, but that "fuck I can't go back" moment right as you cum is always the worst.

Theres two i can think of off the top of my head. One is when i had a pic of my cousins tits i managed to get and i jerked off in her bed with her dirty black lacy thong while looking at it

>>947891963
It was a good few years ago so I look at it now as a positive experience and one that I kind of enjoy the memory of but at the time I was a confused mess of horny feelings and guild and disgust. Tasting your sister's feces as a sexual experiment is unforgettable in both right and wrong ways.

>>947890404
HAHAHA

>>947892327
The second one is when i happened to see a friend login to her fb and learned her info, got curious and logged in when i was alone, had send nudes to her exes and then bf through messenger. Came so hard going through and saving them. Some i saved as she sent them to her bf

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>>947892405
>Tasting your sister's feces as a sexual experiment

>>947892405
>Tasting your sister's feces as a sexual experiment is unforgettable in both right and wrong ways.

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1.98 MB GIF

>>947892405
>Tasting
>your sister's
>feces

>>947892786
Risky move, most people can see external login activity on their profiles

>>947893427
Hilarious to samefag the exact time it takes to finish another captcha ... Retard

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A naked Minnie Mouse plushie straddling my erect penis like a horsey while I jerk off and I dump my creamy load on her naked girly bits.

When I was a mid-late teen my mom once left the door half way open when taking a shower and the closet mirror happened to be angled perfectly that I could watch everything in the reflection. Waited until she got out and while she was rubbing lotion on her whole body doing her routine I came so hard I felt like I was going to pass out lol don't think I've came that hard or that much to this day

Licking used bloody tampons from the bins in the unisex college toilets while wanking.

>>947894735
I can't picture that mirror configuration.

>>947894884
It was an odd layout lol my bedroom and parents bedroom shared a big walk in closet which was also connected to the master bathroom. Kind of hard to explain

That the hottest goth girl. In the city, that everyone was fighting over, had her phone stolen or hacked and I found them. Nit was the best wank ever. And eventually the entire male population saw them.

>>947894498
get help.

>>947890053
The time that I was sleep wanking dreaming that I was wanking to a girl that I was spying on through her window into her bedroom.

>>947890721
Public restrooms

>>947899066
only the ones with holes tho

>>947898614
>sleep wanking dreaming that I was wanking
wut

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>be like decades ago
>be me @ 12yo
>be in my room naked and beating off to photoshopped Wesley Crusher porn
>mom walks in
>what are you doing? are you masturbating to photoshopped Wesley Crusher porn?
>her clothes fall off
>she pushes a fist into my anus
>elbow deep with no lube
>reaches round and starts into slapping the end of my dick onto the corner of the desk
>my bowel muscles contracting around her forearm
>head of my dick turning purple, throbbing in agony and pleasure as she forces raw spaghetti down my tiny piss hole and flexes the shaft so it breaks into agonizing shards in my urethra.
>I'm fantasizing that Wesley is raping me
>mom is calling me a little faggot as her arm works in and out of me, starting to get lubed with my blood and diarrhea
>she starts biting my nipples til they bleed
>edges me for about six hours that way
>finally it's too much
>the rhythmic pulsing in my intestines combines with the agony in my penis, producing the most unimaginably intense orgasm
>I ejaculate about six pints of preteen semen into my hamster's cage, drowning the poor animal
>collapse panting, nearly blacked out from the intensity of the painful orgasm
>blood oozing from my ruined penis and i will never hold be able to my feces in ever again
>she stands over me and releases a torrent of scalding hot urine over me then defecates into my open mouth
>i swallow it down greedily and managed to stammer out the words "thank you so much mom" as she kicks me in the stomach
>before she leaves, she forces the still-twitching corpse of my semen-drenched hamster into my gaping and prolapsed rectum then mashes it to a paste by inserting a baseball bat into me
>I sit up and see all my friends have been watching and taking photos and videos of my torture
>best day ever

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>>947890424
>Vicky
You don't mean........?

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>be taking a shower
>wash ass with shower head
>little spray of hot water shoots up my hole
>feelsgoodman
>do it some more
>couple of wet farty bubbles squeak out
>get hard
>push shower head up my ass and spray boiling water on prostate
>balls starting to twitch
>suddenly I'm ejaculating semen and diarrhea
>boiling diarrhea shooting from my mouth and nose
>bathroom flooded with septic half-digested food and semen
>sister comes in, starts writhing on the floor massaging stinking semen mix into her vagina
>don't you ever knock?
>she starts giving birth to puppies
>every puppy has my face

>>947898482
Hey at least he's not eating his sister's shit.
(I mean, unless it's the same guy.)

>>947890053
One of Lucifers hobbies is pornography. He films it himself, he actually is that woman. But the way the internet is framed, porn sites and such, makes it look like it’s made by average people. He’s into some very hardcore fetishm, which is clearly what happens when you become very old like lucifer is. He’s probably hundreds of billions of years old. He gores his own bodies sexually and then shows it to people. I dunno the full story, he seems to enjoy watching us watch his porn though. It’s like showing your own porn video to somebody, except you’re in the room with them while they jack off to it. He’s also clearly incredibly ugly, as a result of his inbreeding. He’s been breeding his own clones lol. And then will become his own children. And it’s been hundreds of years of the same exact thing for lucifer. He seems to enjoy cuckolding and BDSM domination fetishm of human males. And, also enjoys findom, so he will find ways to steal your money. And, this seems to give him some temporary hit of sexual pleasure. Hes not more honest about it because, it just doesn’t work as good. Nobody wants to service Lucifers dick.

>>947902360
@grok is this true?

>>947902413
...and I call it "The Aristocrats"!

>>947890053
Name?

>>947902530
All those people are Satans clones. There wasnt even any trigger for this, he just films gore videos so he can post them online. I don’t really know for sure why, it’s kinda boring though. Like thats a really boring thing to do isn’t it? He clones himself, so now his bodies are here for like 80 years at a time. He controls every clone. And, he kills a lot of them too because, they were gonna die anyways. So he tries to make shit up basically like, shit that just wouldn’t happen like anime for example. He draws the anime dude. Yeah the gore videos though are like extra gay because nothing is even happening there. Like imagine filming a gore video. Same with porn. Those are like the two gayest things that Satan uses his clones for. Nothing is even happening in these videos, nobody is even there except Satan

>>947902625
Yeah man, I’m glad you’re reading my shit. Thats fucking true, I got so excited like maybe I’m finally meeting somebody who isn’t another one of his ugly inbred clones. But I was only meeting myself. He literally just draws inuyasha and Naruto while fucking and killing humans dude all to like distract us from his own personal virgin and pregnant woman farm.

>>947902360
>"thank you so much mom"

>>947902378
Im pretty sure thats what he means. Been around here long enough to know those threads.

>>947902378
That girls actually lucifer. One of his strategies for population control was confusion tactics. He films his own “stock images”, where he literally just acts because he is that woman. Then uploads them online in different ways to trick humans. He had tons of weird scams like that with photography. Photography is complete aids dude, because lucifer actually looks at it and asks “hmmm how can I steal using this camera”.

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>>947902413
>sister comes in, starts writhing on the floor massaging stinking semen mix into her vagina

>>947902790
If you get caught looking at Kiley's old videos, you won't be a "Free man" for long!

>>947902951
This is lucifer again. He films tons of hardcore cuckolding fetishm pornography then shows it to us. That girls literally been alive for billions of years, and this is what she does. Or he, im not totally sure what to call it. The thing about lucifer is he doesn’t explicitly state that he has been cloning himself. Not really, not in any credible way. Actually wait he totally does. I guess I’m just stuck here alone with him. That’s so bad. Look at what he’s doing dude that’s fucking disgusting lucifer go kill yourself.

>>947890053
can we get this video without the frogs?

Finding a video on my gf old laptop from way back of her getting doggies by one of her cousins

>>947902229
it was wut it was

Edged for like 4 hours to my friends and crush with an anon on disc I gave him some mega folders of them and he fed me. I used both my cocksleeve and vibrator on my dick

>>947902492
I'm not >>947894498 just a plushiefag.

>>947890053
It was the one when I was on my way home one evening and I decided to pull out my dick through my zipper and started stroking it as I was walking along

>bi curious, been exploring
>meet up with 55yo man from craigslist
>his cock is very thick
>throat fucks me
>ride him
>cock so big it actually hurts
>jerk my cock and cum buckets
>get off his cock
>he rolls me onto my stomach and keeps trying to put it back in
>tell him it hurts and not to do it
>>I will be quick don't worry
>it hurts the whole time he fucks me

Jerking off to that memory is the best wank I've ever had.

>>947908214
Ive had a few similar experiences when I was 17 and started exploring, it was always such a rush of adrenaline and fear waiting for an older man to pick me up on the dark stretch of road away from my house and letting him drive me back to his place an hour away and just going along with whatever they wanted cause I was young and naive, definitely took alot of risks but it was always worth it.

the one when I ate one of my sister's turds, shit was SO cash

>>947908349
I never took any risks like travelling long distances, except for meeting up with strange men I suppose. But I did very much learn to like doing whatever they want. There was a period in time where I'd tell guys "you aren't fucking me hard enough if I'm not asking you to slow down".

got into my best friend’s lil sister’s snapchat. she’s a 10/10 and I was already jerking to her for years. Took me months to get passed all of the two factor bs, but once i got into her account i came instantly, uncontrollably. probably the most I’ve came in the shortest amount of time. She had a lot of good shit on there, but the initial rush of getting in really got me. it just was a massive payoff after gooin to her for years and trying to get into her account.

>>947890160
I remember digging it up to find the audo.
Holy shit it's so hilarious.
AHHAHAHAGUUUGGGHHHH!!1
PPPFFFFT FFHHRRT PFFT FHHHRRT PPFFFT FHHRRT

>>947908214
>>947908349

I started meeting guys of omegle in my early teens.

So crazy looking back now. If I saw a boy now doing what I did then, I would be flabbergasted

When i was around 15 i made a burner instagram account so i can jerk off to feet and connect with likeminded people from my country, found a guy who was probably 25 if i remember correctly, both of us were extremely horny constantly sharing vids us of pumping our cocks and all sorts of feet (we both loved very meaty, rough and wrinkled soles). One day after a maybe 2 hour long edging session say fuck it and get on video call with him, every stroke feels like heaven, cum so much one rope hits my face and everything else is spilling from my hand onto the carpet and the floor, my legs are shaking and my whole body is sweaty as fuck because it was summer.
It’s been 4 years and i want to meet with this guy so damn much. He deleted his insta and i don’t know anything about him aside from the city he lives in. I really miss him begging to gag on my cock while we watched foot porn and smelled each others balls :(
Does any anon have an idea how i can find him again?

>>947908849
Same for me. I was 15/16 posting craigslist ads saying I was 18-20ish. And exclusively looking for men over 40. Which is wild. If I saw a kid doing that now I'd want to let their parents know immediately.

Never really thought about it before but anon is right. The pure adrenalin involved is likely why I look back on those memories with such horniness. In reality, I remember a lot of those experiences being awkward or uncomfortable in the moment. It wasn't until I had some experience that it started to be consistently pleasurable/fun. But at least I got some fappable memories of questionable consent.

>>947908984

biggest rush i ever had was being tied up by a guy, in his daughters clothes, in his daughters bed while he was telling me how i shouldnt have come to his house and hes sorry that he isnt going to be able to control himself. probably among my first 5 sexual experiences, totally inexperienced and too young to know what i was doing.

didnt know how to feel about it at the time but thinking about it gives me a huge rush. sometimes i wish i could spend time with "me from back then"

>>947908919
I don't want to be found. Drop it.

>>947909149
>>947908984
>>947908349
I’m so jealous of you fuckers for actually pulling the trigger. I always chickened out when it came down to guys but when it came to women they were the scared ones. Just fucked up enough to literally record me JOIs on voice messages and constantly send me pics of their feet in response to vids of me jerking off but not fucked up enough to actually meet up irl and drain my balls

>>947909149
Damn, I'm lowkey jealous of that one.

I never let a guy tie me up, although I told a few they could. Guys are always less kinky in person than they are over messaging I've found.

My biggest rush was sucking 2 guys at once. Married gay couple. I was more like 19 then though.

>>947890053
>>947890053
05914997221
47d6f968acd
c396fa3eee8
1c9fc26d682
a2288bb2671
29c01bfc762

definitely Masha or another nn model

>>947890053
one time years ago my cum was so thick that a part of my load got stuck im my dick and i had to massage it out and the feeling of it coming out was better than cumming

>>947909382
I probably chatted to 2 dozen guys over a period of 6 months before I actually met up with one. And the guy I met up with was nothing special, but the stars aligned where he was close, I was horny enough to go through with it, and my parents wouldn't be able to tell that I was about to meet a strange old man on the internet to fuck my ass.

I LIKE TO WANK

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this one

>>947912276
Do ye now, lad? Do ye now?

>>947890053
I got a hold of a teensy weensy bit of that weedle-dee-deed!! That WEEDLE-DEE-DEED haha oh my goddddddd anon haha Jesus man Jesus! I'm high as FUCK!

>>947890600
God, that's hot. You should do it again.

>>947892405
>Tasting your sister's feces as a sexual experiment is unforgettable in both right and wrong ways.
seek help immediately

>>947890160
I might’ve seen a few videos of girls bottoming out / tearing their pelvic floor over the years, but i’m not sure. The other one is a loose woman on a f’ing machines video.

>>947890053
20 years ago and I’ll never forget it. My sister and I were in our experimentation phase and we were at the point where we were looking at each other naked. She wanted to see me jerk and finish. We were in her room sitting on the floor. She was naked under a robe showing me her tits and vag. She was squeezing her tits with one hand and spreading/massaging her vag with the other. I’ve NEVER cum so hard from jerking than that time.

the first time i wanked to my mum ....was amazing

Most recently the best wank I had was when my sister in law stayed the night and left her dirty clothes in my bathroom. She was ovulating so her underwear had a musky crust in the crotch and I had such a good time using them to jerk off while they were out of the house doing a little shopping.

Always when I am coming home from a long trip.
2-3 weeks of not wanking leaves me with super erections. I can cum two or three times without losing it when I get back from such a trip.

>>947890053
Roommate's gf use to shower in the late morning before heading to class on Tuesdays. He was always at the gym then.
The door knob was old and I drilled through the handle so I could peer through.
Use to jack myself off as she undressed, dried off, and dressed. that was the best of times, the best of faps... wish I could just live those moments forever

I met a girl from an online video game. We talked for hours on discord and then I drove to her place and she was actually the most attractive girl I ever got to date. After cuddling and kissing she let me jerk off into her mouth while licking my tip. She swallowed all of it

This one's kinda weird I guess, back in the days of Yahoo chatrooms it was like the wild fucking west. I'd be between about 12 and 15, got in the habit of wanking for far old indian gay men and I'd cum buckets while they talked dirty to me and rubbed their gnarly brown cocks for me. Looking back now it's luckt there's noo screengrabs of me floating around. Or maybe there are and I don't know about them.

>>947917139
>kinda weird
>kinda

File: Amber Turner squirts_.mp4 (1.83 MB, 1080x720)

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>>947903584

>>947917963
preferred it with the frigs but thanks

>>947917963
I mean, she's not faking any of that. No way can any woman voluntarily contract like that. Just spectacular genuine orgasm action there.

>>947918169
>frigs
freudian slip if ever I saw one

>>947918169
Sorry, but....did you just say FRIGS??

>>947894498
>pedo sex with Minnie Mouse

>>947918830
frogs, frigs, either is acceptable in this context

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>>947917139
>I'd be between about 12 and 15, got in the habit of wanking for far old indian gay men

Jerking off on the top deck of the bus with ******girls sat in front of me.

>>947920123
pajeets or natives?

>>947920151
>******
only 5 letters in trans

>>947920163
why are you asking me? I was quoting someone else

>>947890424
>>947902378
>>947902790
>>947902989
Who's Vicky? Who's Kiley?

>>947920889
ur mom and ur dad

>>947920889
Sorry. It's Kylie, not Kiley.

>>947890053
>dad and stepmom were arguing in the basement
>listened through the vent
>dad was pissed about watching his nephew (my cousin) fuck her in their bed
>she argued he'd watched a dozen times already
>he felt forgotten
>she didn't want to give up his larger cock
About ripped my dick off that night thinking about the situation right in my house.

>>947919987
No.

>>947890053
My first wank to lily

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>>947920659
>How did you find the vid with audio?
Not that anon but I found it for >>947917963
by using the triangle drop down to search image ~ yandex for pic related.

>>947923654
Lily with the huge anal dildo?

>>947924646
Unless that's a pic of her I haven't seen yet then we're talking about a different person

>>947923654
Lily from the naked bike ride? You know her irl or something? Only reason that would be an exceptional wank.

>>947926339
Nah, I don't know her but she's the embodiment of my version of the perfect woman

>>947927436
You the no-kik no-save guy? She’s my perfect women too

Probably one when i was high as fuck, i had an electrical stimulation pad on my directly on my asshole and a massage gun. It felt like was getting my ass literally sucked on while my cock was screaming to just cum, literally one touch and it starts squirting/ sliding out an i could feel every pulse of it, my legs desperately wanted to straighten out but i held them their and it made it even more intense cause of the resistance it created.

>>947890053
>what's the best wank you ever wanked?
Fucking my sex doll one time while high on shrooms

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this video - and this is the only part of it I can legally post

>>947927552
Yes. I wish she did onlyfans

>>947928648
She really should have drank that

That one time I pulled back the foreskin all the way for the first time

>>947928991
dude, I think she more than earned her money making that whole video

>>947928955
Alexa pearls full library of pics and videos but it’s all lily instead

>>947890053
Prob the first time I every spied on my sister in law shower and busted all over my keyboard when reviewing the footage

>>947929323
But I really got my hopes up when I saw the cocktail glass. It's super rare to to see drinking videos

>>947890053
Either when I got nudes from a girl 3 or 4 years younger than me back when I was in school or when I made an AI fake of a classmate who I had known for 7 years by then

>>947929510
IDK who she is

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>>947929951

>>947929610
I'd already totally jizzed onto the ceiling by the time it got to the "emptying out" part

In three parts and really needs sound
https://webmshare.com/dGNoL

https://webmshare.com/Vb3Bz

https://webmshare.com/qOXL7

>>947930278
I saw the glass in the trailer so I skipped to the end to see if I was going to be disappointed. I was so I haven't even watched the rest of it

>>947890053
https://www.getthelube.com/pulse-vault

>>947909703
what are these?

>>947928648
what else happens?

>>947930198
Man, what a nostalgia fap. Got sauce?

>>947934360
Boaring stuff

I'd be probably 15, loved hanging out on my own out in the woods, even had my favorite tree to climb up and sit and look at the world and just unwind. One day I just needed to get myself off, stripped totally naked and fapped like a safdari park chimpanzee.on my favorite tree. I came so hard I couldn't stand up for ten minutes, cum all over me and I didn't give a shit. I felt so at one with nature, so relaxed and fulfilled, so satisfied and I knew that from that moment my tree and I would be together forever.

>>947935664
this nigga thinks he's tarzan

>>947935628
There's a few ways the video could have been better. Firstly, no mask, obvious because we all like to see the looks of shame, horror, disgust, surprise and pain they feel. Some anal would have been welcome and as you point out, drinking the vile slop that dripped from her vagina would have made for entertaining viewing. And I never like to see any trace of a man in these videos, even if it's just a hairy arm waving an iphone under her cooch to get the low shot. Train another naked woman to do it, it's really not difficult. Finally, I'd always prefer to see a shy, nervous white chick rather than some brazen Brazilian whore who looks like she does this every day of the week. A bit of shame at what they're doing for a minimal amount of money adds to the humiiation of it. Overall though I rate it an A minus. One of the best.

>>947936585
I tried to be funny by doing a pun, but I agree with what you said

>>947890053
that one time when it was real mind blowing.

>>947891774
I'm scared this shit would ruin sex

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>>947890053
I used to exclusively fap in bed, laying on my back and let it shoot on my stomach/chest. I must've been 16 or 17 and recently gotten back from a long road trip where there had been no chances to fap. That night I shot the biggest rope of my life, and for the first time it cleared my chest completely and landed in my open, moaning mouth. This was the first time I had tasted my own cum too, which to my surprise was salty yet ever so slightly sweet. After my incredibly strong orgasm, I tasted what was left on my stomach and chest, which to my surprise was very yummy! Past girlfriends and hook ups have almost always been surprised at my lack of reluctance to eat, let alone touch my own cum. I'm glad it shot into my mouth that night, I just wish I could shoot like that every time!

>>947890053
Likely an incest POV where I was high enough it felt like I was part of the video.

>>947939355
same!! I love to shoot my load on my face and also feed myself a whole load when my balls are full. I love the taste of my cum

>>947939355
(now ex) wife used to suck me and cum kiss my load into my mouth and I loved it.
She knew I would devourer her pussy when she did it.

>>947940281
nice! you ever tried to shoot your load in your mouth?

>>947939664
I wish I could get that high again but my tolerance is fucked. I need shrooms to feel the way weed used to make me.
And fapping while tripping is fun and all, but I don't think I could ever focus enough to actually cum.

>>947940368
I could never shoot that far but I scraped plenty of loads off my belly into my mouth once I learned how good it tasted.

>>947940666
Try by getting upside down on your shower wall being legs up and let them fall. your cock will be pointing at you,, making things easier and you will eat it straight from the source ;)

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>>947940748
I've fucked myself in the shower but never tried to go upside down and take it fresh from the stick.

>>947941793
Me too.I lube a long deodorant can and I fuck myself for a while. that gets me real hard and long, almost to the reach of my tongue in that position. I can get precum and the full load. seeing my dick pointed towards me also gets me riled and makes me shoot cum harder

>>947890053
Was drunk at a party and was in a guest bed with a friend. Told her I wanted to jerk off and she wasn't bothered by it and even was talking dirty to me during. When I was close I asked if I could finish on her face and she let me. I have never had a load that huge before or since.

>>947890053
probably around the time i was 11/12 and started ejaculating sperm, not just clear fluid. I used to be able to cum so much back then, probably the best wank I can remember was being able to get my penis to touch my lips for the first time and then shooting handsfree all over my face.

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>>947890053
I was on a 3 day meth bender and had been jerking it to cam girls for like 12 hours, when I finally came I nearly passed out and blew the biggest load I had ever blown and it shot with the most distance I had ever seen. My dick was a shriveled up red pool noodle at that point and then I think I passed out with my dick out at my desk.

Meth is a hell of a drug, I don't recommend it to anyone. Glad I gave that shit up in 2016.

>>947941985
That sounds so hot. Don't know if I'm flexible enough to take my own load right into my mouth but maybe I can work up to it.
Spraying myself in the face with a dildo in my ass would be heaven.

>>947942172
Fapping is great but I'm glad you're getting clean, /b/ro.
Best of luck to you!

>>947942352
you dont need to be too flexible. lay down in your shower, back yourself against the wall and lift your legs against it. start lifting your ass against the wall until is fully up with your legs and your back, let your legs fall a little and you will face your cock. get that dildo lubed before you do this and at reach so you can grab it and start fucking your ass while you wank yourself until you shoot your load.it feels so fucking good!!

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>>947892405
Supremely based

Your fortune: Very Bad Luck

I found the tumblr of a girl I went to school with. she posted some spicy stuff. on a few posts she discussed how I and my friend (her bf at the time) used to get her way too high on shrooms and "rape" her. I remembered a lot of it, but she obviously remembered every single thing, because she reminded me of things I had forgotten all about. it was hot as fuck reading about it from her perspective, while I remembered it, and looked at her nudies. It was such an amazing orgasm, I wanted to edge it, but I couldn't even manage. I couldn't stop myself from cumming. I came so hard that I pissed almost immediately afterwards and my balls were tender.

wish I had screenshot the stories because the tumblr is gone now =(

>>947942733
I dunno, it was kinda one colossally good orgasm immediately followed by revulsion and a lifetime of abject sexual confusion and shame. Plus it's hard to sit across from your sister at the dinner table and make polite conversation knowing that you spent the previous afternoon painting your nipples and penis brown with her bodily waste before pushing it in and out of yourself a few times.

>>947902787
Surely I can't be the only one here who understands this? And yeah, one hell of a wank!

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>>947943217

Had a much older brother. His gf was a 9/10. Was home alone edging to bbs erotica stories. They show up and I have to stop. They're there to shower and change to go to a formal event. Ok what ever. They leave and I notice she left her bag behind. Go into and find the wettest creamiest panties ever. I had never seen so much wet fresh warm pussy cream in my life. I latest like 4 strokes and painted the ceiling.

it always astonishes me how little most men know about their own body in regards to masturbation. Most have never tried to cum hands free, and those that do usually do it by anal stimulation. You can achieve orgasm simple from doing kegels, and holding it, until it becomes internally stimulating.

Light-tough masturbation is another one most aren't familiar with. For example, using just a finger lightly making a circle on the frenulum. The lighter you can go and less you squeeze your PC/BC muscles, the better the orgasm. You have to really let it build and avoid the temptation to grip the penis hard or start tensing.

One of my favourite ways to do this is with a sock, actually, because the fabric is tickly. Nylon is also a winner. Some of my favourite wanks I can remember, i'd get high as fuck and put a sock on my cock, with a full bladder. I'd build myself with the light touch and piss into the sock for a bit of added sensation. It's pretty hard to resist the temptation to just grip and pump the cock and cum, I've failed many times but succeeded as well.

>>947943664
*light touch.

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>>947943664
well that simply had to be recorded for posterity

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>>947944114
as did this
>>947890600

>>947930130
Nice. Does she do gangbangs

you know those yoga sausage-like bags? i took a realistic cock dildo, tied it to the sausage, towards one end of it. i put the thing on the bed. and straddled it, ready to ride. i took some rope. wrapped it around the same end of sausage, led the ropes in front of me, around the bed frame and then back towards my feet. tied loops at the ends of rope and put my feet in it, like a when you ride a horse. sat on the dick, got myself into a position for a doggy, but with my feet in the air. now, when i straighten my legs in the knees, the rope pulls the yoga sausage with the dick up and towards me, so its basically like getting fucked from behind. so i just kept bending and extending my knees and got myself rammed from behind. i couldnt come while doing that, but i was close for an extended period of time. after a while i got exhausted i and a lied on the bed, to recover. after 5min i started to feel the hornyness rising in my belly. i barely managed to climb back on the the dick in time as i came. afterwards i felt so relaxed in my entire body, as if i my whole body got massaged from the inside. 10/10 cant wait to do it again

>>947945808
No she’s in a long term relationship with some guy. Just like Lily ffs

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>>947948061

>>947928648
Link?

>>947950255
learn to use yandex and search for videos based on thumbnails.

probably that wank i wanked. "wank wank" i went, it was wank-tastic

>>947890053
Wanted a werewolf dick dildo for years and finally got one with a tube you can use to squirt fake cum out of the pee hole. Within minutes of it arriving I was in the shower pumping iron. Managed to knot myself, came, and pressed down on the squirt nozzle filling me up, all at the same time. My only verbal thoughts were "(I'm) pregnant with a litter" or something to that effect. Blacked out and couldn't move for around 20 minutes, any movement on an atomic scale just made me came again and again, all while still knotted so I couldn't unknot myself without cumming and almost blacking out. I never felt so exhausted, nothing has ever compared to that day.

Was probably when I spied on my huge titted sister getting railed

>>947890053
Fuck I love British slang. It's just hilarious to read or listen to.

>>947950326
can confirm, I also wanked to his huge titted sister getting railed. it was a fine wank

>>947950324
u are like that one in elementary kid who constantly makes up ridiculous fantasies over the simplest questions

wank

>>947950376
The one time I don't lie on b and someone calls me out for it. Silly website.

Managed to go through the phone of my gf's ex and saw her getting fucked. Not a cuck but it was a good wank

>>947950274
Didn't show any results.

>>947948467
Fuck. I bet her bf is an insecure fag

Defos when my long term bud finally came over and we pumped over our mutual. He was on his knees stroking with her sports bra we'd bought. Him spraying all over my dick set me off, and I couldn't stop shooting. 10/10.

I actually prefer edging for long periods of time over many sessions and not cumming for days. I get annoyed when I push a little too far and cum sometimes because it will take me 2 or 3 days to get back to that level of arousal again.

I think edging after I haven't cum for 4 days feels better than cumming for the 5th time in one day. I find the orgasms pretty unsatisfying and hollow if I came earlier that same day.

I had a girlfriend who taught me how to appreciate chocolate (no she wasn't fat). It is about putting a little bit on your tongue and slowly letting it melt and coat your tongue over the course of a few minutes. Never chew. It is so much better that way. The object of eating chocolate is to enjoy the flavor and texture, not get it into your stomach. I cringe when I give someone a piece of expensive artisan chocolate and they chew it up and swallow it in under 10 seconds and are like
>Meh, I don't really see how that is better than a regular candy bar

Same with fapping. Gooners who go straight for the orgasm are missing out.

>>947890299
Its not poop - she has a vibe inside her ass

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>>947890053
Does anyone else ever get a bit sad that they will never experience an orgasm as long and intense and erotic as females can?

>>947951213
Yes, but the trade-offs aren't worth it so it's hard to truly be upset about it

https://exxxposed.net/post/58601
Fuckin this faggot up his perfect phat female lookin ass

>>947951213
I'm the opposite. I'm always sad I'm never gonna be able to feel what it's like to ejaculate ropes of cum like a dude

>>947951240
L O N D O N

>>947951240
It's fun until you realize you gotta clean that shit up.

>>947951265
Yeah except I'm the one washing it out of my hair and i don't even get to feel what it feels like

>>947951289
Learn how to squirt then!

>>947951313
Never been able to do it. The best orgasms i have are usually from oral

>>947950624
Lilys? Maybe, she’d be constantly hit on. But surely he’d get used to that

>>947951240
True, that part is pretty fun. A bit more dramatic than your anticlimactic pulsing shit

>>947951240
I've always been jealous of that too. I've always struggled with orgasm as well. I remember watching my older brother getting tugged off by his gf and marveling at how he came

I found out a friend had nudes leaked by an ex. I held off on looking for them for a while but was too horny to stop myself one day and was amazed at how easy they were to find. When I opened that pic and saw her naked for the first time I was shaking so hard I could barely breathe. I had wanted her so bad for a long time but she was with someone, and finally seeing her perfect body and knowing I could use it whenever I wanted just short circuited something in me. I exploded pretty much immediately and fapped to it maybe 6 more times in a row the second my dick could get hard again.

I found my sister in laws vibrator in her closet. I could smell her cunt and juices on it. I sucked it and used it on my cock and balls and came for like a minute and fully drained myself. I almost passed out from the intensity of the orgasm. It felt so fucking good.

Not my proudest moment. Me and my two best friends (both girls) were 17 and wanted to have a birthday party for one of them. I got some booze and weed for it, and her mom was out of town so we had it at her house. It was fun, and the non-birthday girl either drank too much or had some bad reaction but she puked in the bathroom and then passed out. We decided she should sleep on the couch, so I picked her up and carried her to the couch. After taking her to the couch, she pretty much immediately woke up and went back to the bathroom to puke again and then promptly passed out on the bathroom floor again. We decided not to move her, and the birthday girl decided to go upstairs to her room to sleep. I said that I wanted to stay to watch over our friend and make sure she's okay.

I've wanted her sexually for years. I knew her email logins and knew that she'd fucked a couple guys. I'd even gotten some quick feels on her ass a few times, and it was the firmest thing I'd ever felt. With her in front of me, passed out, in these tight yoga pants, I couldn't help but explore. I felt her ass like I never was able to before. I put my hand down her pants and felt her bush and slid my finger over her pussy but didn't have the bravery to put a finger in. I slid my hand up her shirt and felt her tiny little tits and moved her bra aside so I could feel her nipples.

Obviously I was rock hard during all this. I kneeled down beside her and put one hand on her chest while the other was holding my cock. I jerked off right next to, touching her, and came the hardest I've ever cum. I leaned down and kissed her on the lips while I came. It was the hottest moment I've ever had. I cleaned up and took a little cum and put it on her lips and took a little more and put it down her pants on her pussy.

To this day, I don't think she knows it happened

>>947951343
get some pro dude to give you a pelvic massage, 19th century hysteria remedy style
you will squirt

>stolen nudes from my sister in law
>stopped jacking off for 2 weeks before going to her house again
>abstained from any porn
>get to her house
>go to bathroom
>look at her nudes again as i stroke slowly
>im leaking precum like crazy only 2 minutes in
>grab her conditioner from the shower
>nearly blackout as i cum harder than even in my life
>pump shot after shot into her conditioner
>walk back out like nothing happened

I still cum to her nudes daily, and drop off a fresh load of cum in her bottle any time im over there.

>>947952547
So fucking hot. I've cum into so many friends' shampoos, conditioners, and lotions. And foods too. It's like you own them a bit

Recognized a girl on here. Talked to the other anon and he was her ex. He sent me a few nudes but I was worried about doxxing myself. Searched the archive later and found that he'd been posting her off and on for years. Saw every inch of her body and I pull her nudes up on the down low whenever I see her.

>>947890053
Broke up with my ex and found her hot friend on a cam site and jerked off with her kek

>>947890600
>never done anything like that since.
But you did it once and now you have to live with that.

>>947890053
I have never wunk.

>>947952602
Its people like you that are the reason I warn girls to check their shower gels with a black-light after a boy comes over.

imagine if you brought a girl over because she said she was on birth control but lied and now yer a father.

that's equivalent to your actions.
not only by scale, but you can accidentally impregnate a woman like that. any woman who uses that bottle is at risk of becoming the mother of your child. genetically traceable, and doctors know about your kind, you creep.

so in the event of a jesus baby the doctors first instinct is usually a lying cheating hoe, cummed in bathroom soaps and cummed on toilet seats.

dont be a fucking retard trying to goon. look at what happned to that nigga who went to mcdonalds with his dick out. he fucking killed himself. you wanna end up like that? fucking moron.

>>947953520
a rare experience.
especially one that still stands.

>>947902787
i understood that reference!

>>947955160
Can you explain?

>>947955838
he cant explain but I can.

us postal service. it sucks but their motto is a speedy delivery. which "beeline" plays on.

its a pun and irony at the same time.

comprehension skills.

>>947956175
wrong

>>947951213
Nah, shooting ropes is the best thing ever

>>947940281
Current GF loves sitting on my face after I cum inside her.
>>947940748
16 to 18yo me used to be able to bend pretty far and get like half my dick in my mouth. Imagine how many loads I swallowed during that time in my life.

Told the chick was dating at the time that I had a panty fetish. Occasionally she would slide her panties off, wrap them around my cock and give me a wank until I busted in her panties, and then she'd put them back on.