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08/21/20New boards added: /vrpg/, /vmg/, /vst/ and /vm/
05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
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File: img1.jpg (494 KB, 1632x1224)
494 KB
494 KB JPG
Tasty for me
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what is this
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>>23347167
crab meat probably
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>>23347167
>>23347186
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surimi
Fake crab
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IS THAT FUCKING CRAB JENGA!?
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>>23347555
Yes :)
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>>23347620
I am arresting you under the salmon act of 1986 section 32
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>>23348508
In the matter of the Salmon Act 1986, Section 32.
My Lord, the charge is without foundation. The Act concerns the suspicious handling of salmon. Yet no salmon has been handled here. The object in evidence is constructed from surimi sticks — processed white fish, coloured to resemble crab. To call this “salmon” is a categorical error.
Nor can the circumstances be deemed suspicious. The structure was openly arranged upon a plate, visible to all, with no concealment or deceit. This is not subterfuge but culinary whimsy.
Indeed, the act is one of artistic expression. To assemble food into a playful form is no crime, but a human freedom. If such gestures were deemed illegal, every child who ever built with peas or carrots would stand condemned.
Furthermore, jurisdiction fails: the Salmon Act binds England and Wales. The accused resides in Dwingeloo, the Netherlands. British salmon law has no reach here.
Finally, mens rea — guilty intent — is absent. The purpose was humour and artistry, not fraud.
Thus: no salmon, no suspicion, no jurisdiction, no intent. The charge collapses entirely.
I therefore pray this court dismiss the matter forthwith.
Respectfully submitted, Counsel for the Defence
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>>23349119
You don't seem to realize that you are dealing with the British police sir. Such technicalities do not matter to us we arbitrarily apply irrelevant laws whatever we please and will hold you for years during drawn out legal proceedings even if you are clearly innocent
>artictic expression
Right that's it we are throwing you in prison for the rest of your life
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>>23347167
looks like faux crab
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>>23349197
>*shows you my stabbing license*
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>>23349243
sorry
loicense****
>>
>>23347047
>Literally vomit fuel
>"Tasty for me"
I bet this is that "Death to Russia" faggot, isn't it?



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