Basically, people are f'd up when going through grief, and in the West, especially for christians or traditiinalists, the traditional funeral service at a venue seems to be an iconic image. Funeral Homes can be owned by corporations or private equity, who can be greedy people. They know the bereaved are in a lost and confused state of mind, and may not do research, "shop around" (seen as rude..), or understand the value for what they get. Urns, Caskets, cremations, and services can be marked up several times over, with sales pressures like "this is the last thing you can do for mom" or.. "she would want this..", or the time pressure of funerals being held soon especially if you want to view the body (some say this is more painful). It's too much to explain, but essentially, yes, investors are present in this industry, there is a massive lack of education on your consumer rights and knowledge (you can bring any third party casket or urn (costco, amazon lol)). Funeral Consumers Alliance is an american website that covers your rights in the US, and Canada is somewhat similar as well. This industry is hard on its workers, it's not the best, and management want their margins for the rest of the company... or- even an independent or family owned home - who are mostly reasonable, caring, and personal, but can also be more profit than client motivated. The following link is my full spiel with URLs and more stuff. Help spread this around if you can, and keep it in mind for the future. Let's not get ripped off. Do a little shopping around, try to look for independant homes and question what you actually want. Ashes? An urn in an item actualky meaningful to that person? A meaningful at home gathering (after some time has passed). Is a funeral home venue really needed? What is actualky the best way for everyone to interact and share?...https://rentry.co/vykvsq95
you ain't gettin a quality casket for $650 these days niggaunless you want to spend eternity in a plywood box kek
My neighbor was was a guard at a pretty famous and serious mental institution in the states. One of his stories was about a guy who killed his parents, froze them in the basement, sawed them to pieces while ensuring they never thawed, and then he put them down the basement sinks garbage disposal piece by piece. He shop vac'd up the frozen bits. They never found a single shred of physical evidence for the butchery, what got him was he kept their heads in the fridge so he could keep having conversations with them. I figure that's the cheapest way to get rid of mom, after she goes by natural causes of course. Not going to keep her head either.
Im op. Do me a favor at look at caskets that cost around 700 bucks. They're real and it's all the same shit. It goes in the ground and decays and nobody cares. They actually market stronger caskets with seaks and pillows and high thread counts and silk n shit. Can we focus on how this sales industry is uniqely predatory, read my full write up thingy in the link at the end too
Also to the other guy with creative ideas, thats um, going down a missing person case or a violation of federal/state laws regarding body disposale. It has to go through official channels. Sorry bro...
>>61821355>Understand the Crocs™ industry. Prevent yourself from being ripped offHmm, I don't need crocs so It doesn't matter.Some rando has a funeral business so what I have to go through them to be buried ?
People buy footwear many many times throughout their lives (experience purchusing) in relatively normal moods. Footwear is a non taboo topic (cool to talk about)
>>61821392There’s a great game about that. Also incest.
>>61821355cremation society, plain bag, plain box, shovel, dig foot deep hole, cover with dirt, done.or...
How bout thus. You guys really like talking about the jews. You jnow what they do. Pine box in ground fast under 24 hours. Simple, meaningful, cheap (all the same). No upsells for fancy shiny caskets, no invitations, menorial videis, no marked up cremations, no unneccesary embalming
>>61821365>unless you want to spend eternity in a plywood box kekWho cares? You're fucking dead. Not your problem anymore.
>>61821533seriously. just ash the body and chuck it in a field or something
Guys u cant legally chuck the body in ur backyard due to American Law. And ur mourning greiving family are the ones who have to cope with this and pay and many many famalies were happier when they knew what to do, or what they wanted, or, if it all was already pre-paid.I get some of you dont have family for whatever reason or sense, but it matters. Are you mindlessly lost and confused when you go to a car lot/dealership to buy a car? No. How many times do you buy phone plans, internet, home services, cars, etc throughout ur life. Many times. Funerals/Cremations? Maybe once, if ever. And it'll be costly if you're talked up into a 15k bill versus another pkace with similar services for cheaper, or, your own at home thing with the cremation remains. See? None of you know anything about this shit because it's taboo as fuck, which is why I want to talk about it.
Anyway. Hope you guys share this around or some bs. It sucks to be a consumer nowadays
How much would it cost for a 3 floor dungeon mausoleum full of skeleton warriors and gargoyles, with my tomb and treasures at the bottom, guarded by a puzzle trap where you have to spell out ANON on the floor or it falls out on you?
>>61821355Why do Americans embalm the dead? That's not a standard practice
We eblam because of the civil war and Lincolns death. He was able to be shown across the country dead, and people thought that was legit and they marketed it as the right way to honor the dead, while ofc they get the make money on an extra service. US Funeral Rule states embalming is not neccessary, and funeral providers are required to say so (though they can still try to convince you it's more legit over refridgeration, unless of course you wait a good while before the funeral, I'm not fully versed on the details of this). Other countries due to their traditions, regulations, do not have this funeral sales and industry problem that exists in the USA, as does a lot of US problems.
Oh yeah they also did not have fridges n stuff... anon the dungeon idea will cost u 670,000 dollar if u dont do the right research
The link write up is cut off in the preview heres the word count bypass for it https://rentry.co/vykvsq95
Those SpongeBob coffins are pretty expensive, ngl
>>61821355fuck it bro just throw my cold, dead ass into the ground raw dog itsuplex me nigga
>>61821742Getting cremated is probably cheaper. Put that in your will
spending more than a few grand on a funeral is just retarded. same goes for weddings. these events are about love, not flexing wealth.
>>61821783brown ID :(
How much of my net worth should be allocated in a tomb monument so grand so that I get a guaranteed resurrection by whatever entity that deems me worthy? Even if it's just for shits and giggles of powers beyond my comprehension.Or is it -EV and I should just cash it all in life and get tossed to a paupers grave?
>>61821533>>61821537ok godless heathens w/e you say lmao
>>61821355
Pepe the Frog Is Dead: Creator Kills Off Meme Absorbed by Far-RightPepe the Frog, the meme that was transformed from a “once peaceful frog dude” into a symbol of hatred and racism by the far-right, has croaked."While it’s unlikely Pepe’s official death will stop extremists from co-opting his image, this was, perhaps, the most effective way for Furie to reclaim his character; Pepe’s soul has returned to his creator. Rest in Peace," CBR author Shaun Manning said in the post.The frog began as a harmless cartoon in 2005, Furie has said, in the Fantagraphics' comic book “Boy’s Club.” Pepe gained popularity over the next few years online as a meme before his more recent association with white supremacists, neo-Nazi groups and the so-called “alt-right.”The Anti-Defamation League launched a #SavePepe campaign in October, in an attempt to reclaim the positive message originally behind the meme. Pepe the Frog had previously been declared a hate symbol by the ADL.https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/social-media/pepe-frog-dead-creator-kills-meme-absorbed-far-right-n756281
>>61821355are you saying /biz/raelis should start a funeral service? how much would that cost?seriously, though. of course stupid religious people will pay more for this dumb shit. I'd rather have my body simply get thrown in a ditch than have someone pay a lot of money for a box that will end up getting thrown in a ditch anyway.
You guys really need to start thinking about what your mom would do in this situation
I tried selling a nightstand table set to a guy who owned a funeral home on Facebook Marketplace and he was one of the biggest niggers I have ever interacted with. Set a time and place for pick up and 10 minutes later he calls and says he doesnt know when he’s going to get here and suggest I just deliver them to his funeral home on the other side of town instead. I told him I wasnt doing that and mentioned what he was pulling wasn’t what we agreed on or cool and he started mocking me. I told him to get fucked and hung up. Sold it to some old hispanic lady 20 minutes later and loaded it in her car for her.
Guys just so you know im not racist or gridy like u guys are this is the first time im using
I hope the team that's not the npatriots wins
In my state we are forced to buy overpriced caskets by law. We can't just build our own.
What do they do with a dead body if you don't pay for all this shit?
Government handles it and treats the body with respect n stuff. Probably doesnt cost the state themselves that much
Good topic for a thread OP. You're right, they really jew you when you're vulnerable. I think all the ceremony over death is insane, same with weddings. People think they have to have an aristocrat's funeral despite being the underclass same as the rest of us. Spend as little as possible, be there for the bereaved instead.
Low cap real facts... muh igga!
>>61821355Just cremate or perform a sky burial like civilized people do.
Seahawks won
>>61821533this, dead people should be buried in the yard or left to be eaten by animals, what the hell is this jewish business and this jewish society that commands you to spend money on funerals? Soemtimes I wish peoiple weren't such emotional faggots but I love them for that. Thing is, these goblins exploit us humans for this beauty in our hearts
You can also pay for your funeral ahead of time by choosing a funeral home, paying for the casket, flowers, etc. I had a family member do this and it made the entire process very easy.
>>61823160>godlesshow was christ "buried" before the resurrection?
> 4 chan making it about the jews againJews spend the least #reverseuni card #instagrammemes2016 #gayniggalaert #belshcawn meme
You work for a funeral home when you fail at realtoring whatever
>>61821355When my dad died, they asked me what music I wanted to play while attenders got seated, they didn't ask if I wanted music, just what music. They charge you for each song. When I asked if we could just not have music she gave me a look like "really?"fucking parasites
Lmao wtf? They were charging for each song? Sounds lime a fun fun suprise bill that comes up later
>>61828148?then just cremate him and skip a funeral..
The older I get the more cremation makes sense.So many creepy assholes are digging up graves these days to sell bones and I don't see this country getting any more reasonable especially considering the internet rot and fatherless mutts running around.I read yesterday that Hugo Chavez dug up Simon Bolivar's bones to do black magic rituals on them.Fuck that shit.Unless I have a tomb built and hidden on my private property locked in an indefinite trust I don't want to fuck around with the unwashed masses
>>61827379My dad this this for his mom and the family fought him it was sad.My grandma went crazy in her final days saying she hated my grandfather who passed a long time ago, and then my dad's sisters changed all the plans and I think he lost out on the money he already committed.
Fuck this just bury me under a tree
>>61821355The whole thing is adjusted for life insurance payouts. You are a literal retard if you go into crippling debt for a funeral.You also don't negotiate or haggle with them. You give a flat price on what you can pay or go ahead and just burn the body. Now this needs to be said for room temperature IQ anons but the number can't be something retarded like 100 dollars. The whole dog and pony show of a funeral is a 4 figure expense. Not over 5000 dollars but 1000-2000 is realistic.
Well it's based on what's the cheapest for what you roughly desire and cost of living in your area. Life insurance payouts makes perfect sense, never thought about that. Thanks anon.
>>61830011when my dad passed away i yanked out all his gold teeth, becsuse i knew the fukers at the mourgue wouls have stolen it anyways.
>>61821355I can't afford to die. Fuck it.
>>61830451>You give a flat price on what you can pay or go ahead and just burn the bodyBased. Or don't even fucking show up to claim the body.
>>61821355I sometimes wonder how much capitalism would change if every product was required to carry an itemized cost in addition to its retail.
My last will and testament is going to specify that spending more than $1370 disposing of my corpse is dishonoring my memory and the values I stood for.
>>61823183Honestly I dig it
>>61821419This. It's called desecration of a corpse and it's illegal because the cops can't ask the decedent about so they assume nobody would want this fate.
>>61821355ideally, i will have no friends or family when i pass, i have an accountant or trust that pays my property tax every year, and nobody actually figures out im dead.
Honestly my ideal funeral is cremation. Plan some sort of family friend gathering 3weeks to 2 months out and share memories and stories there. Gathering at home preferred. Why do we NEED a venue, we just need people. Store me in objects meaningful to me, give out some of my ashes to those who it makes sense too
>>61831433Cremation is barbaric. Just chuck me in a hole in the ground, no coffin, no funeral.
Just learned of the term New Orleans funeral. They wait longer so the bereaved have time to process it, but also to organize a family-friend reunion of sorts. Also remembered this gem: https://youtu.be/Uer4fiP2E6c?si=IxdFl5FYOtqn-8MS
>>61821355>55-year-old mother does her own research unprompted>Sends to me and my brother an email saying she wants a plain cremation with no funeral or wake>Also tells me in person that most of her relatives are lying drama queens and I shouldn't invite any of them to any non-funeral post-death celebration that we choose to holdBased?
>>61831601basically this but gimme a pine box, no paint or plastic crap. Hell I'll build the box myself. And don't embalm me or any of that shit, just dress me in some of my all natural fiber clothes and put me down 6 feet. After a few years there will be nothing but my teeth and bones, no pieces of plastic polluting my grave forever.
>>61821355Just put my death body in a forest
>>61821355can't you just order a casket online and bring your own?
Of course, it's always possible to have great funeral homes and caring staff. You just need to find them and reward them with your business
>>61832442that'll be $999.99, sweaty
>>61821355>what's this?
>>61821355That's the urn
>>61821355>don't need it. We're scattering the ashes.>yes, so we were in formed. However, we must of course transmit the remains to you in a receptacle.>this is one hundred and eighty dollars>it is our most modestly priced receptacle
>>61821392>I figure that's the cheapest way to get rid of mom, after she goes by natural causes of course. Not going to keep her head eitherAbsolutely not worth it, both by the psychological cost of having to chop human meat and nanny state that doesn't allow that. If one single piece gets caught by sewer workers (that exist specifically to vigil your trash) you are fucked
>>61821565>None of you know anything about this shit because it's taboo as fuck, which is why I want to talk about it.The midnight gospel has an episode about this and that was number one show on Netflix for a while
>>61821355why can't we just throw dead bodies into a forest and let them rot?oh yeah, because it's "illegal" and that wouldn't make any money
>>61821355Actual interesting thread, thanks for posting.>>61821392>>61833134>Absolutely not worth itI... I don't think it was a serious suggestion, anon
>>61833145>the midnight gospelI watch that show about once a year, I love it so much. Thanks for the reminderI don't think it specifically goes into the logistics of funeral arrangements, though. If I remember right it's mostly addressing the (inevitable) death of his mother directly
>>61823183>highway to hell plays
>>61823183You guys saw the body move at the end right?
>>61821640My nigga right here
Thankfully india and africa dont gave such white and oredatiry industries (like this)
Anyone remember this shit (2020)https://youtu.be/Er57QHHiE_Q?si=F2Z1zHvhqs1_C8SJ
>>61835014Yea, you just throw each other in a shit river or do whatever the fuck this >>61823183 is, we know
Gimmie dis shit
Honestly I wanna like, leave a video or a request or something thats so suprising and meaningful that it goes viral online and makes the news. Why not turn a sad death into art?
>>61821516Anon, my grandfather owned a funeral home and my father has been in the graveyard business for 40 years, want to know who the biggest spenders are? Jews. They want the nicest plots, the biggest head stones and perfect landscaping all the time. Jews unironically got me through childhood with plenty of food on the table.
Anyone know what it's like to lose someone? It's supposedly an extremely emotional lost, confusing, and hard to remember experience. I have no idea how they can be expected to make financial decisions or ask, what do I really want.
https://youtube.com/@trutv?si=7hJYFmJFzW7EDTTa
Nice. This one too https://youtu.be/bZ83Wh0V38k?si=LzP8oP0aCnLkpAKJ
>>61821365Body goes 404 in under a year including the wood. Only bones left.
Not of you get this nice, gasket sealed, metal casket with pillows and silk and and and...We even have this visual thay totally wont convince you to get it water tight too,You would want your loved one to be as comfertable and safe as possible
Is there a sales job as generally bad as this?
.
I want this
BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Does 4chan have post stats or views? Ima post more on here, maybe
Nice thread OP. You should also talk about pre-need contracts. Lack of interest on money or inflation adjustment cucks families later. Sorry grandma was sales raped by some pre-need sales person. https://wjla.com/news/local/dc-mom-prepays-her-own-funeral-before-death-family-gets-a-bill-for-double-amount-contracts-pope-melbert-johnson-sharon-watkins-preplanning-insurance
>>61821392>I figure that's the cheapest way to get rid of mom, after she goes by natural causes of course.Holy shit you can literally just not claim the body and the city will cremate for free. Like how fucking stupid are you? You probably think you inherit her debt too.This fucking guy is ready to hacksaw his mother's corpse and put it down the garbage disposal LMAO
https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/282505/jewish/The-Basics-of-the-Jewish-Funeral.htmlBased???
Wouldn't it be funny for someone to go online and find obituaries of funerals that occurred at known corporate locations - then contact the family with this sort if material? Careful...
Consumers Funeral Alliance (of America) The official https://www.funerals.org/
>>61821355>with sales pressures like "this is the last thing you can do for mom" or.. "she would want this.."kek, the total unrestrained nihilism of the west never fails to make me laughit's like pure concentrated evil everywhere you look
It's only expensive when you don't know what you're doing and choose expensive services.In most areas there are cremation business that only do cremation, which is far cheaper that burial, and those business also usually charge far less (like $1000-2500) for cremation than regular funeral homes.>cremation business owner
>>61842352Ayee lmao put me in the screenshot
