This Thanksgiving, how many tofurkeys should I make for a group of approximately 15 hungry people? Any prep tips?
(You)
>>21671053Depends how big the tofurky is, you cock.
I think one tofurkey is like 7 or 8 servings so just get 1 or 2.
Make sure to cram the tofurky 3-4 days before preparing them to ensure an enjoyable experience for everyone.
>>21671063It's not like I'm catching it wild, I'm pretty sure they're all the same size.
>>21671053My brother, who's probably as mentally afflicted and as emaciated as you probably has 2/5ths of one. Possibly half. So, 6 will probably do.
>>21671122we'll have meat, i just refuse to support big turkey
>>21671085Where would the tofurky reside, if it was a wild animal?
>>21671161some asian country>>21671053about tree fitty
>>21671161in wild rice fields in the swiss alps
>>21671131>big turkeythen find a farm
>>21671161San Francisco
>>21671171the turkeys there are probably even bigger
>>21671053If you bring tofu anything to my Thanksgiving I am going to put a bullet in your gut.
>>21671175I agree. Gross.
>>21671175Yeah my SIL is vegetarian (for medical reasons, she's really looking forward to when she can eat meat again) and even I don't subject her to this shit, I'll roast a squash for her and stuff it with mushrooms or something else special just for her
>>21671235Hell I would eat a dinner of nothing but a damn good green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, stuffing sans meat, corn on the cob, mac and cheese. Like there is tons to bring that isn't the turkey or deviled eggs. Just don't defile the meal with some fake gross shit.
>>21671161Wherever there are carnivores to condescend at.
>>21671240Yeah I totally agree I usually don't even eat much turkey, I like to save as much for sandwiches as I canI still like to make her something special cause she's always stuck with sides at family things and also my wife was in a coma last year and they made a pact that if my wife dies I marry her and she's younger and prettierBit chubby since the lockdowns but with my cooking I can fix that
>>21671053zero, because no one will eat it.
>>21671053
>>21671240What if someone is vegan? All you said that a vegan could eat in that would just be corn on the cob and maybe the stuffing. >>21671280Oh, I think everyone will eat it if there aren't other options. Obviously sides, but they'll enjoy it if they give it a chance.
>>21671316Then they can eat crab grass. If it is medical I'll make an exception but if you're coming at a celebration of food with an agenda that want me to compromise taste and quality to meet some artificial stat check for your morals you can stay the fuck at home. There are almost always some kind of animal substitute to conventional ingredients but unless again. Medically required. which then you already know some vegan options are disqualified. Make regular food and let them figure it out. Or have them bring their own. They live that vegan life. Let them share with the class what is the upper tier echelon of vegan cousine since they are the experts.
>>21671316>Oh, I think everyone will eat it if there aren't other options.no anon, if I was at a dinner and the main course was tofurkey (with no other meat options) I would leave and never come back or talk to whoever made it ever again.
>>21671316>but they'll enjoy it if they give it a chance.nope even my vegan friend says it's meh at best.
>>21671329>>21671493>>21671494Some people coming are already vegetarians or vegans. It might be a waste of money to make a full real turkey, or a waste of a life.
>>21671316>they'll enjoy it if they give it a chance.NO ONE will ever return for thanksgiving at your house ever again. You'll be black listed by friends and family alike on this important food holiday that's about indians somehow, so if this is the goal, well played, sir.
>>21671500>or a waste of a lifeThe turkey you don't buy will die anyway, and if it's never purchased, he may be turned into dog food or thrown away. Honor him and eat him with friends. Strip the carcass of the good chunks of meat and toss the bones and cartilage and bits of skin and all the rest into a pot with water and herbs and carrots and onions and celery and a couple of bay leaves and cook it down at a low simmer until you get all the flavor out. If you think about it, break the bones before you put the carcass in the pot, or break them open after they free themselves up and soften a little. The longer you simmer it, the more gelatinous and cartilaginous the broth will be - good stuff. Strain out the solids, aside from the larger bits of rib meat and the meat bits that fell off of the bones during cooking, but don't go overboard with that, add new carrots, onions, celery, herbs and the good meat you previously removed and bring it to a simmer until the carrots are soft, or even just simmer the broth and veggies until they're soft, then add the turkey to reheat it. If you add egg noodles, make them separate and add them just before you serve it/ Then you put it all in the blender and take it all as a hot enema. Even vegans can't say no to a hot turkey soup enema. Or, you can skip the blender and enema and just serve it to yourself and your family as delicious homemade soup. Turkeys are bountiful animals.
>>21671596Reading this post, I'm really considering getting a turke->Then you put it all in the blender and take it all as a hot enema
>>21671607boofing turkeys is a national pasttime
>>21671607I've never actually done that, but it's always an option with any meal.
>>21671607Y'all niggas need jesus
>>21671500>or a waste of a life.you're a waste of life.
>>21671053Are they hungry because they're vegans?
>>21671596>The turkey you don't buy will die anywaythis is something fucking vegans don't understand. they don't set animals free if one idiot doesn't buy it. the animals are killed based on projected need, not a pol of the whole population. vegans not eating meat makes no difference at all. they are still an extreme minority.
>>21673579Anyone builds up an appetite on Thanksgiving, anon. :)
>>21671235Man I wish someone would roast my squash and stuff it with mushrooms.
>>21671240Yeah, Vegetarians at least aren’t cut off many enjoyable food as strict vegans. Still crazy to think how every holiday/celebration food can work strictly Vegetarian but not strictly Vegan.
>>21673583>they are still an extreme minority.and an extreme cause, considering we didn't farm until maybe 10,000 years ago, so humanity evolved on meat. It's like unchecked immigration: a cause without any thought to the repercussions.
>>21671053Zero, make real turkey instead.
>>21674380a bunch of simps for animals that would eat a vegan (without their consent) in an instant.
>>21675192Thank you for recognizing thatI was staring at one of our trees, thinking it's over 100 years old, and thanking it for its shade, while recognizing the fact that it would pick me up like an ent and eat me if it could
>>21675192Wouldn't the irony be overwhelming?>>21675199Don't be silly; It's the grass that wants to kill you.
>>21675248I don't cut the grass, my FIL does(I pay him in food plus he weirdly likes it? Whatever, works for me)But I do pee on it sometimes, but I think it's into that shit
>>21671053>hungry peopletrust me, they'll have eaten plenty before they arrive to eat your tofurky
>>21671053Who's really going to eat more than a couple of bites of tofu turkey, for fuck's sake? One should be more than enough.
