CONFESS
We Americans fucking suck at making good entry level wine
Mashed potatoes are tastier with margarine than with butter.
i klarna'd a wagoo steak once
>>21691203>We Americans fucking suck at making good winefixed
I can't tell soy sauce from maggi.
I'm cooking less and less and getting takeout and eating frozen food more and more.
I much prefer meat in bite-sized sloppa format than as a big fucking piece on a plate
I think seed oils are perfectly fine and the hysteria surrounding them is way overblown
>>21691416thats not something you have to "confess" its just objectively true
I'm burnt out from junk food and hiking, For the past week I've just been nursing an ankle sprain and eating meals under 400 calories.And it feels good.
>>21691416>>21691452wrong
>>21691194>Retarded /pol/ meme Thread hidden
>>21691194I only really cook for other people. I either eat simple quick food, or treat myself like a guinea pig for new ideas.
>>21691462you cannot substantiate that position in any meaningful way. youre welcome to try though, i could use a laugh
>>21691476https://drcate.com/pufa-project/
>>21691476>i could use a laughacquire a mirror pronto
>>21691479there is very little with actual weight behind this "project"
>>21691481whatever you say fatty
I pretend to be vegetarian or vegan so I don't have to eat peoples disgusting food.
>>21691487But then don't you have to have the fucking dumbest clueless normoid conversations of all time instead?>hurr durr but do you eat fish>hurr durr do you eat chicken
i just fucking farted
>>21691194I only ate 10 eggs, 2 tomatoes, two peppers, half a block of cheese, and some popcorn I popped on the stove in the past 6 days.
>>21691203California makes the most in America and they have nasty wine. Italy, Spain and France are miles better and usually cheaper. I've had good wines from Virginia, Maryland and Pennsylvania most of them take a more European approach.
I often fantasise about splitting someone’s head open with a claw hammer. I want to hear it.
>>21691194I think White Castle is the best fast food cheeseburger
>>21691509I drank a bunch of kava last night and now can't stop farting.
>>21691194I dip my balls in water and then dink it like tea
I buy coffee from McDonald's every dayI tell people I'm vegetarian but I eat meat sometimesMy first gf and I drank each other's piss. Hers tasted like popcorn.I farted in the bakery freezer every shift in 2016-2018.In highschool, I mixed the packing powder and soda together. Also left a literal bunch of bananas in the oven while it was hot and left for my next class, and made the teacher seethe (didn't get caught)I tried eating dog when I visited China in 2015On new years eve this year, I landed in Japan, went to a Food Mart and bought $20 worth of snacks, went up to my hotel room and watched the sunset while talking on the phone with my mother and looking at my Fuji. I ate from styrofoam and plastic wrappers and went to bed after.I haven't had a proper sit down meal in months. I just toast bagels and warm up frozen vegetables in the microwave.In Thailand I was at a food market, and I had my wallet in my back shorts pocket. I felt something touch my ass, and when I turned around some sorry old twink was nodding no no no. I grabbed his hand and twisted it while squeezing as hard as I could and called him a scrawny loser. He fucked off after, and no one seemed to care I did that to a local.I think that's enough for now...
>>21691194I prefer cheap lagers to craft beers.
i stole the cookie from the cookie jar
I keep failing to eat leftovers.
>>21691194i learned everything i know about cooking from Chef John
>>21691194I jizzed in a cup of Clamato™ juice, and disappointingly, it still resulted in the same usual throat irritation you get from drinking jizz
>>21693287He said CONFESS not HUMBLEBRAG, take that shit to instagram or something>>21691194I can't get eggs to crack well on flat surfaces and always do it on the rim of a bowl or pan. Never saw a problem with this but faggots freak out.Also, I still enjoy IPAs and Sriracha. They'll never take those from me
>>21693287>I had my wallet in my back shorts pocketyou goddamn retard
>>21693581try dropping the egg from 1 foot above the pan. Make the cracking gravitys problem
>>21691194I ate the whole fucking pizza.
>>21694081That's the only way to eat pizza
>>21691260>conveniently forgetting that California beat France in a major wine competition
>>21695095Lol
i think nearly every pizza is better with jalapeno on it
>>21695095btfo by amerimutts
I put sugar in my spaghetti sauce
>>21691194I use the air fryer as an oven replacement because I can't afford an actual kitchen
>>21695517
I currently have a hunters soup/curry im eating... its been going for a week and a half and ive refilled it twice. Pic is from tonight before going to bed.
I bought a wedge of Parmigiano Reggiano to use when I make pasta, and instead I ended up eating the whole wedge in 2 days just by itself.
>>21693287>My first gf and I drank each other's piss.What the fuck is wrong with you?
>>21691194Due to tough times I've been eating for lunch hotdogs, but not just hotdogs, I mean the abomination known as australian hotdogs folding cheap white bread loafs because buns cost double.
>>21691194ive been too lazy to use my espresso machine in favor of instant coffee for the past month
>>21691194I put fizzy powder into my cola to make it even more abhorrently sweet and chemical tasting
>>21691194I spend like 12$ bucks everyday at the bakery because I'm too lazy to make myself sandwiches for work.With that money I could make myself sandwiches for like one and a half work weeks.
>>21691194I call tortillas taco buns
I bring a reusable grocery bag full of items with me to fast food places. This bag contains: a bottle of water, so that I'm not tempted to get the fries+soda just to have something to drink with my meal. A 2nd bottle of water, in case my gf's coming with me, or I'm extra thirsty. Disposable plastic straws, because if I DO get the soda, fuck paper straws. Disposable plastic cutlery, because fuck disposable wooden cutlery. A small bottle of ketchup, because these places are stingey as fuck with their ketchup now, and I don't want to hassle the employee to get more than the 2 measely packets that they give you by default. Disposable condiment cups, because even when the place has a proper dispenser for their ketchup, the condiment containers are literally the size of a thimble. Wet wipes, so that I can wash my hands without needing to go into the bathroom. And lastly, though this isn't food related, a bag of quarters, to either use at a local arcade run by an old friend of mine, or to pay for parking.I usually keep this bag in the trunk of my car, and it comes with me more often than not when I'm driving around on a day off.
I keep planning ambitious cooking projects but often get too hungry to want to spend the time on them and make slop and then some ingredients go bad after a couple of days
>>21696073>ingredients go badThis is such a horrible feeling for me, I always feel like such a lazy worthless pos.
>>21691194all colors of onions taste the same to mesame with beer and root beer
>>21695586I was extremely depraved from never having a gf before and she was a sex fiend.
>>21695993KEK post a pic of the fast food aid bag
>>21695113>>21695508The funniest part is the moment the judges heard they'd been praising a burger wine, they threw a melty and tried to change their answers after unknowingly shitting on their precious French classics
Me and some mates have legally binding contracts that if one of us lose a limb or die, the others can cook and eat some of the dead one to see what human flesh tastes like
At our workplace kitchen I always grab a clean teaspoon from the drawer to to put instant coffee into my cup and then put it back into the drawer.
>>21691509I can't burp unless I'm on the verge of vomiting so I fart constantly. My life is pain
>>21696257I can burp on command. And vomit to.
>>21696258Sounds nice. If I'm drinking beer I feel amazing after a cheeky purge and I've learned to just let it happen. The one benefit of my condition is that it's hard for me to overeat or drink tons of beer because I just get full of air so I don't get fat. Downside is I'm just bloated instead
>>21696201there is no country that would allow such a contract. you are probably already breaking some laws by having made it.
>>21696340Any country does if you're rich enough, lad. Especially if you're old money.
>>21696344you aren't rich enough
>>21696347Broke response
>>21691194yesterday i were at my dad's for dinner time, and i were given some smoked salmon to bring back homei got forced off the bus because "smoked salmon stinks"so i had to spend an hour walking insteadbut at least they didnt eat my tasty fish
>>21691194I cook all my eggs in the microwave. It's just too easy.
>>21696670I'm sure that is an actual sin, I have done it myself in dire times, there is something incredibly soulless about this, like you kill the egg twice despite it not being fertilized
>>21691194I have been so depressed, and unwilling to leave the house. Yesterday I was struck by intense sugar cravings, which is extremely rare. I cobbled together almond butter cookie dough from things she left in my pantry, but then I just ate the dough instead of baking it. I hate my life. At least I’ve kicked drinking for the last 3 weeks, but I think that ends today.
>>21696694It's just so easy to do for breakfasts, just 2/3 eggs and a bit of butter. Done by the time toast is ready.
I got obsessed with healthy foods a nutritional values that I haven't eaten any goyslop in over a year. Although I want to allow myself to "cheat" occasionally, it just feels like I'm about to poison myself when I'm about to; and I turn 360° and walk away.
>>21691194I've never been able to eat horseradish or wasabi. The extreme pungent flavor of them is completely repulsive to me and if I get a sandwich with even the slightest hint of horseradish on it I cannot eat it.
>>21696073>>21696106Same. I live on the former WW1 frontline and I learned to never let anything go to waste.I can legit feel like a criminal if something went bad and I didn't notice.
I made a pan of lasagna for the second day in a row, I finally remembered both times to put both layers of cheese on the fromaging bechamel layers instead of just on top, but this time I forgot to season the meat/pureed carrot, celery and onion with garlic mixture. Still good but this pan ain't gonna get eaten as fast as the well seasoned one did
>>21696696Stay cool anon, go take a walk (In opposite direction to liquor store)
>>21696344It's not just about the law and money retard. There are so many people involved, it'll never happen. You have the families, the friends, the hospital staff, the mortician, the mortician's boss, the boss' boss, and whole bunch of other assholes to go through. Let me guess, you guys were in your 20s and thought this was something "cool" to do, huh? Not just you, but your friends are also fucking idiots.
>>21691194I'm Fat
I got tired of eating ramen every day so I spluged on 14 steaks and now my teeth hurt from eating steak every day.
I use very expensive cuts of meat to make burritos and chili:A5 wagyufilet mignonribeyeSometimes I chew my meat, squeeze all the juice out with my mouth then use the resultant mush to soak up more juice from my plate.I completely ignore all health advice from the internet, and the government as I have found almost all of it is compete bullshit. most government health advice is based on flawed studies, and idiots parrot them because it fits their narrative.
I eat low carb almost carnivore but every two-three months I'll bake myself a crusty country loaf.
I have learned how to cook very well, but have been eating out for dinner 4 times per week for the last 3 years because I can. why spend all that time and energy to make a steak when I can get a damn good one from many different restaurants, served to me by other people, who then do all the cleanup.Same with things like thai, mexican, or indian food. no fuss no mess, and when you eat at different places you end up finding the best. eating the above is way easier than making it at home, and just as good.
>>21695095I mean, that is cool, sure, but there is a tradition behind that still sands
>>21696761Must suck to be poor AND retarded
>>216914096oz of meat really is enough for a good dinner, imo.People should load up on more vegetables and save the meat for being the jewel of the plate, rather than the majority of it.
>>21698260Tried that but it leaves you hungry. More meat = more satiated = not over eating or snacking.
>>21698268true dat.I never once walked away from a meal that was mostly vegetables and went:>holy shit I want more of that.>man that was filling and satisfying.inb4>you be done not made it right den!fuck off.
>>21698260I lost 100 lbs doing the exact opposite of this.
>>21698288Good for you bro! I lost about 25 lbs doing the same.