>>21826893>female soiface>retard hair>plant based>non GMO potato>perogy>european inspired dumplingsYou win OP. This will be the most infuriating package ITT./thread
>>21826895They're actually pretty good. I got the cheddar ones (not plant based) cheap some months ago and my kid and I loved them. Wife was less enthused. >>21826893These look fantastic and they're always on managers special despite not being close to expiry but I just don't want to buy a package of cookies with a fat, sweaty mongoloid on the label.I guess no one else does, either, which is why it keeps winding up on clearance.
>>21826909>he actually bought them with moneyI stand corrected. Anon is the most infuriating thing ITT.
>>21826912For $1.49 for 454g of dough, cheese and potato, it was a good deal. : )
fuck these. They were better facing horizontal with the paper guard. now they're all cross cross and floppy
>>21826928trees living is better than your thinking.
>>21826909>5% profits donated to charityThat's a token gesture. Newman's Own donates 100% of profits.
>>21826909would (the cookie)
Tech bro garbage
>>21827095>Newmanhas that Seinfeld and Jurassic Park money. He can afford to give away all the profits. Colettey has to pay for her tard helmet and tard diapers out of pocket.
>>21827797i was curious and it looks like.an analogue to hummus. if i were a schizo i'd say this is a psyop to link bad words with mediterranean foods or some shit.
>>21826893Seems like everything these days comes with a loud text bubble saying “Real this!” or “Real that!” and all it ever does is make me wonder what’s going on with the rest of the ingredients or what it was they were feeding me before
>>21827103The packaging is the best part about that product because it at least leans hard into the niche it wants to appeal to.
>>21827814The most boring packaging possibly being the best part is unironically hilarious to me
>>21827150>celebrity endorsed sauce has celebrity take up majority of the packagingAnon, what else do you need?
>>21827804It isn't really, they make a whole variety of flavors and all of the ones I've tried are much thinner and more "sauce-like" than hummus.
>>21827080is that a brand tied to Peter Stormare?I wouldn't call the packaging particularly good, but it's far from being the worst I've ever seen.
>>21827150That's good packaging because I spotted Guy walking through the grocery store and got a couple of bottles of bbq sauce.
>>21827954>costs 12.99 for an 8 ounce box in your path
>>21827954>designer "healthful" corposlop uses corporate memphis art styleDamn, their branding is right on the money.
>>21827111Keked and checked
>>21827982They're $3.99 if you're not an idiot. Still over double what I normally pay for cereal.
You may think it's cool but in reality you're the guy holding a can that say "pussy"
>>21827797>>21827795>>21827150>>21826909>>21826893I notice a common trend with these bad packages is that the person in charge put an ugly face in front of these package.
>>21827797apparently the brothers who started this brand lost it to their sister & her husband.
>>21828062Michael Douglas' favorite beverage
>>21828058>They're $3.99 if you use my favorite internet celebrity's (incel) promo code
>>21828083Looking it up;That vile bitch wasnt happy with 33% ownership (her brothers also having 33% each) so she claimed intellectual ownership of the recipe, and locked them out of the building.They couldnt sue over it for religious reasons so they just abandoned the business to start their own.Really i wouldnt doubt that she did create the recipe, but they started the business, the arrangement was fair, shits fucked.
>>21828105The Bitter Battle Behind Bitchin' Sauce: A Multi-Million Dollar San Diego Success Story Still Souring On Social Media
>>21828111Correct, i used exactly 1 source and have already made up my mind on the matter.women shouldnt be allowed in business or politics.
>>21827103>tech broKys
>>21828104I have never used a promo code to buy anything in my life. I can't name any Internet "celebrities" at all and the ones I can recognise by face, I've never heard their voices because I don't watch their videos. You're just shit at shopping, is all. Not saying that anyone should buy Magic Spoon. It's very likely very bad. But if you know how to shop effectively, you can drive the price down quite a bit.So again: they're $3.99 if you're not an idiot.Most recent supermarket purchase down to cheap as chips prices that I haven't mentioned yet (I brought up all the meat I got yesterday already in another thread: >>21826235).Six-pack of King Oscar mackerel for $9.77 (we just bought a six-pack the other week but for under $1.65 a can, I couldn't let this one go), 6lbs of Ore•Ida fries for $3.99 and a twofer of Zout for $8.25 (not food but fuck me, if it ain't the best laundry spray on the planet).Combine sales with personal prices/store coupons and manufacturers coupons and voila; cheap groceries.It's not rocket surgery.
>>21827095>We're giving it all away!Based Newman's Own. Their condiments are some of the best too
>>21828077It's pretty common in marketing where they try to push the "story" behind the brand, aka the founder. But you can also just make up a person so that people believe it's a real product for real people like themselves.
The legend.
>>21826893They spelled it wrong? Wow
>>21828113These cookies fucking suck and they are the opposite of healthy they have so much fat and sugar, the texture is like a ground up tire.
>>21826893
>>21827890It's pretty good stuff, too.
>>21827150a white sauce called 'Donkey sauce' may be the least appealing sell even without the celebrity dicksucker packaging
>>21827954it's classic late 2010s globohomo art.You could probably find hundreds of products with a very similar design.
something about this unsettles my berries.
>>21827080This almost works, I think it's the color that kills it. Darker label and it would look a lot better.
While it is dog chow I have to say I wish regular food packaging looked like this. Also, their website is hilarious
>>21828394yeah, that gorilla always had a bit of an uncanny valley thing going on.
>>21827795
>>21827797this shit actually tastes like fucking garbage. it's not a big container and I couldn't even finish it.
>>21828498Me on the right
>>21828138That's alot of useless words to say the hook nosed tribesmen intentionally fucked our economy and what's left of our rotting nation nine ways from Sunday. And that's if you can even find food that's not genetically modified or contains some kind of impossible to pronounce name right out of an advanced chemistry class.
>>21827795these are my gas station snack of choice when I'm driving and don't want fast food
>>21828062That was / is the most delicious energy drink ever created
>>21828406Shit reminds me of this website (which I never figured out if it was satire or being serious they supposedly worship a space elf named ashtar sheran that showed up). If you want to go down a hilarious rabbithole I highly recommend just clicking randomly around the site.
>>21829056>she can't pronounce mack•er•ellolI knew women were less intelligent but c'mon, lady! Wait. Used a too-big word. Lemme release: I knew women were dumb as shit but c'mon, lady!There. Better. Now you can understand that I'm condescending to you. That means "talking down" btw, sweetheart. : )
>>21829103Your post has absolutely no relevance at all to my response. Back to the dark realm from whence you spawned from Jew bot. (I'm a male btw-ftm)
>>21829115Oh no. On top of being female, the poor lass is also retarded. That's two layers of stupid. Poor you. Here, let me jog your memory, milady: >>21829056>And that's if you can even find food that's not genetically modified or contains some kind of impossible to pronounce name right out of an advanced chemistry class.>impossible to pronounce>>21828138>mackerelThanks for playing. Get yourself a midol. Maybe that'll quell your period cramps long enough to make you less retarded. : )
>>21829129I never once mentioned mackerel in my post, my gender-fluid confused friend. Under the unlikely assumption that you are not a machine, I suggest you go outside find the nearest blade of grass and put your sweaty, oversized fingers on top of said grass and rethink you're vile assistance on this ungodly realm we call "earth."
>>21828062Is this better?
>>21826909im more bothered by the use of the word "the"
>>21829103>There. Better. Now you can understand that I'm condescending to you. That means "talking down" btw, sweetheart. : )Sweetheart, if I wanted condescension, I'd ask my toddler for advice. At least *they* have an excuse.
Post the cookie again
>>21827954Shit like this is almost enough to make me turn fascist.
>>21829187>she's mother to a non-binary toddler Surprise surprise.>>21829169>doubling down on her trisomyCollettey, 'zat you?
>>21829330I accept your concession, my brown friend.
>>21829226Almost enough?
>>21829373>she says, colourblind and femininely unable to pronounce mackerel Shoo, Collettey. Go be retarded elsewhere.
>>21828394The new (new, it's been like a decade) box is soulless.
>>21829377>>she says, colourblind and femininely unable to pronounce mackerelOh sweetheart, your cognitive dissonance is showing—did your malfunctioning chromosomes forget to install the basic software for coherent thought, or are you just cosplaying as sentient while failing at both biology and vocabulary like a drunk macaw with a thesaurus?
>>21829094Man I love shit like thisCheck out Francis E. Dec for something similar, he was like a Terry Davis from the typewriter age
>>21829386>she's tripling down nowTrisomy will do that. Are your cookies any good?>>21829396>>21829094I had a friend twenty years ago who was dating a girl whose mother was in some weird cult where they worshipped Victor Hugo of all people for some reason (also Confucius, I think) and the family altar had a multicoloured beach ball with an eye painted on it. She also had holographic pictures around the house and one was of Jesus and the apostles hanging out on the moon or some other craterous, lunar landscape looking place. An earth-like planet was in the background, just behind Jesus' left shoulder.
>>21829419>cult where they worshipped Victor Hugo of all peopleI guess they just really, really like les miserables
>>21829419that's a vietnamese cult, was her vagina horizontal?
>>21826893Worst packaging is any Ben and Jerry's that features a picture of a human instead of a cow because those humans tend to be garbage.
>>21828469I miss the milk comes in bags memes, sadly now posting one would get you a ban
>>21827110Nah, this is better than what it replaced.
>>21829425I never saw her vagoo but he dumped her because she wanted him to piss on her, which he did, but then she wanted to piss on him, which he did not. Also, I thought she was Chinese but maybe she was Viet, idk. Her name was Qui/Kwi/Cui or however it's spelled. Basically pronounced like queen - n.idk if that's a Vietnamese name or not but that buddy said she was Chinese. She was Asian, she was a mall goth and she was into watersports. That's pretty much everything I know about her.I'm gonna look up more about the cult, then. It just seems utterly silly.>>21829423I guess? I just thought it was really fucking weird that her mom had these religious icon looking things of Victor fucking Hugo and Confucius all around the house but the Jesus-on-the-moon thing was by far the most bizarre.
>>21829177>pissneryuck
>>21829488They probably just copypasted some posts on reddit
>>21828114Faggot
>>21829542If you'd spent any meaningful amount of time with them, you'd realize they arent of much use outside of the bedroom, kitchen, or raising children.If you give them power in the household, they will destroy the family.Give them power in the country and they will destry the nation.
>>21827982extremely cheap for heroin
>>21828394There is no need to be upset
>>21828394This post really rustled my jimmies
>>21829419Oh honey, the only thing more half-baked than your insult is the chromosomal abnormality that clearly left you with the cognitive capacity of a concussed sea sponge. Your existence is what happens when natural selection takes a smoke break—no amount of store-bought cookies could ever sweeten the tragicomic failure of your genetic lottery. Tell me, do your parents still flinch when they hear your name, or did they drown that reflex in cheap vodka years ago?
Fun Fact:The logo of our restaurant proudly features Diana, our quirky CEO.
>>21829623This reads like a retarded AI that was told to come up with a roast
>>21828114Based
>european inspired dumplingswhat the fuck does this even mean
>>21827954The fruit loops one is the worst with the vaguely feminine androgynous thing on it. The figures look like recession era hipsters doing things.
>>21826893Tbh this is actually kino packaging. I really wanna try it.
>>21829732When Mongols invaded Europe and sacked Kyiv, they brought Chinese perogies with them. Europoors, being unable to afford meat filling came up the idea of stuffing them with potatoes for the ultimate carb-on-carb European inspired meal.
>>21829857No potato in 13th century yurp, kiddo.
>>21829907Who said they were? They added potato when it became available, before then they would have used mashed turnip or some other OG Europoor slop.Either way, European perogies are distinguished by being a carbs-on-carbs affair instead of being filled with meat like they were originally designed.
>>21829935Vareniki exist. Your argument is invalid
>>21826895>You win OP. This will be the most infuriating package ITT.You sure about that?And who decided that the pose in pic rel was what ALL celebrity chefs should do? My local store has the celebrity chef frozens all in one case and it's hilarious to see them all standing in that oh-so-welcoming pose.
>>21826909>Changing the world one cookie at a timeShe could probably change her weight one cookie at a time too.>>21827150I literally bought that sauce just because he's on it.>>21827812I remember reading that on a peanut butter container and there was a normal one and one that said "contains real peanuts" and I'm like, the fuck were the other ones.
>>21828062Pour some pussy on it
>>21827954Honestly forget the fact that the content itself tastes like sawdust and literally has ingredients that cause illness and indigestion problems, the globohomo art style itself should be enough of a red flag to stay away. The fact that it's marketed to "Adults who want to be kids again" double downs on this. It's low quality trash packaged as premium quality product sold to low quality people with way too much trust fund money to waste. It's a match made in Hell and they people that produce this stuff knew exactly who they were selling it to.If I ever dated a girl with even the slightest amount of Steven Universe anything, the relationship is over. I know a red flag when I see one.
>>21826893I've got you all beat. Just read the bottle. Soap of all things. All of these things and (and the beliefs of the creators) are like a parody of a fucking /pol/ post. I can't be convinced this entire brand isn't a huge self aware shitpost.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr._Bronner%27s_Magic_Soaps>>21828114Based.
>>21830080Dr Bronner was an interesting guyfrom the Jimi Hendrix Rainbow Bridge film:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7r0ogP91fA
>>21827812Xxx, it’s toasted!
>>21828353and the designs of those products would be similarly bad, what's your point?
>>21830320I hate the future so god damn much
>>21828406Don't you ever shit talk Burt Ward's dog food.
>>21828417>yeah, that gorilla always had a bit of an uncanny valley thing going on.His name is Jimmy
>>21828105i'm not sure how you can be sympathetic if they denied themselves legal recourse because of some religious nonsense, if that story is accurate. the women may be an asshole but we have a legal system that mostly works pretty decently for regular people--particularly civil law--and they chose not to use it.
>>21830080shitpost or not the soaps are legit
>>21830375Don't you have to dilute them?
>>21830375Love the citrus one. My dad has used the peppermint one since he was a stinky hippie 50 years ago
>>21830080This is the most based packaging of all time. Every time I see it at the store, I'll read one section of the text before continuing my shopping. I'm still not even halfway done reading it after years of walking by it.
>>21830411Pre cell phone shitting I would enjoy reading it on the toilet.
>>21827103same genre but I love this one
>>21830426If I didn’t know this was real I would 100% think this was a shitpost.My wife liked the simulate nuggs.
>>21830080>food packaginganon...
>>21830436>he thinks coconut oil and olive oil and citric acid aren't food
>>21827795Didn't they get caught lying about the protein content or ingredients?
>>21827103This actually genuinely pisses me off and I cant articulate why.
>>21828406This is absolutely Based tho
>>21827795EVERY TIME I see these fucking things at the gas station I think of /ck/. I think I'm fucked.
>>21828394
>>21830426garbage product, incredible packaging
Something about the box art feels menacing.
>>21829654I agree
>>21830539It's the long, sharp nose
>>21830539it's the mystery meat
has this been posted yet?
>>21830539>420g
>>21830551I want to eat this so bad, but I can't be seen with it. Will someone buy it for me? I will give you the money. Go inside and buy me a Screamin' Sicilian pizza, I will also buy you one, but I have to wait in the car, and you have to go in an be seen with it in the cart, and at the check out.
>>21830559Literally, and I do mean literally, NOBODY gives a hairy ass fuck about what you buy at the grocery store. They don't notice you. They don't care about you.
>>21830565It's not the other people. It's the pizza. It's like it's looking at me. How am I supposed to hold it if I can't look at it? I just want to eat it. I need it out of the box.
>>21830568Oh aren't you """quirky""". Top zozzle frienderino!
>>21830568I thought of how it's like a food packaging necronomicon and then I thought soiboy lovecraft parodies and then I thought of the pun necronomnomnom and now I'm going to kill myself.Later gator.
>>21829654Your creativity is about as impressive as a microwave trying to write poetry—congrats on achieving the intellectual depth of a soggy napkin.
>>21829836I don't see the issue with this one.
>>21829836>>21830653it looks like the lowest IQ juggalo opened up photoshop for the first time. you could probably find a thousand juggalo or horrorcore mixtapes using the same stock images and fonts. i wish people would be more daring with design but this is just so bad and I wouldn't trust that product to be free from heavy metals.
>>21830583That's chatgpt, certainly. Nobody uses that dash, apart from chatgpt.
>>21830551>>21830559the detroit one is unironically the best frozen pizza i had. the burnt crust bits were perfect and the cheese actually had pull
>>21827795one of the moust foul things i ever had and made me want to get good at making cookiesafter you put the egg in its pretty critical to not overmix, and then that compounds after the flour goes in. biggest tip i could give anyone
>>21830030ground beef is a cottage pie
>>21830551The little mustache part used to pop out of the cardboard and you could put it up your nostrils and pretend to be an offensive Italian stereotype while you made-a the pizza.
>>21830684i would cut out the entire mouth too and wrap it around my face with some string so i could eat the pizza through the gloryhole
>>21830661That’s not ChatGPT, that’s just literacy. Easy to confuse, I guess. Fitting for a low iq human such as yourself.
>>21830712I'm nta you were arguing with. I caught you out. Get over it
>>21826893I bet she gives fantastic head
>>21827889>>21828400Might be referring to the massive dimple in the bottom as well. And yeah, it could look pretty high-end if they just switched the colour around a bit. Black and blue or black and gold would work well since it'd match the seal on top.
>>21830719Get over it? I already moved on before you finished typing, sugar tits.
>>21829857>KyivHer name is Keith
>>21826893that's not how you spell that probably
>>21828288How is this legal?
>>21830127>collector's editionI shudder to think of the people who have hoards of unopened expired food just because of those words.
>>21826928They had these on sale for $1.50 the other day. Filled my freezer with them. Best day of my life.
>>21830753It's KEEEV
>>21830322These have been around since the early 90s at least. I remember them from when I lived in America back then. >>21830375>>21830395>>21830409My wife thins out the lavender one and puts it in a foaming soap dispenser pump thingy for the bathrooms and we use it as handsoap. I've used it as laundry detergent and shampoo. It's not great for either of those. Completely "clarified" my hair IE ate away at every last bit of my natural oils, leaving my hair looking and feeling like dried hay. The laundry was stiff, even after softener, for the same reason. Softener is fat-based and that shit eats away at fats and oils. Good for washing oily skin and counters, tho.>>21830418My poos have always been too quick to leave me any time to read anything. I shit like a champ.
>>21830484A significant amount of the pleasure in your life revolves around preparing and eating food and the existence of a product like >>21827103 implies that there are people for whom preparing and eating food is a chore. These people have presumably found better sources of pleasure than looking forward to their next trip to mcdonald's and having a mirror held up to the superficial pleasures that drive your life makes you angry.
>>21830335Idk, i have sympathy for stupid people. They do their best sometimes.>>21830684I may or may not have enjoyed that feature. Maybe even held it up to my dog until he would monch it out of my handDelightful desu>>21830846> better sources of pleasureI could believe that on an individual basis but their whole schtick is being able to get back to work faster, and i find that incredibly grim. It’s trying to encourage soul sucking corporatism under the guise of health and convenience. And it’s boring and ugly
>>21829492>She was Asian, she was a mall goth and she was into watersports>retard dumped hermy god
>>21829540The Arrogant Bastard label predates reddit by almost a decade.
>>21829492There's a whole politic around chinese/viet identity because the chinese migrate to places in asia and they make businesses and success and the locals get pissy at them as lazy nativists so often do to avoid having to face their own mediocrity and so they try to slaughter them and so the chinese change their names and go "native" so you ostensibly can't tell anymore except you obviously still can, then when they migrate somewhere else they have the localized name and it causes endless confusion, if you're still in touch you can go ask her about it, also ask if you can see her vagina I'd like to know
>>21829540zoom zoom zoom, don't you have some bluey or miss rachel to be watching? christ how are you even old enough to drink
>>21827103>tfw when my HUEL 7x Cajun Pasta only came with 6 boxes and I'll have to go hungry for a day before next week's klausbot ration delivery
>>21831032
>>21830935One man's trash. Someone out there is drinking goth piss right now and im so envious
