Pizza may have been born in Italy but she was perfected in Chicago
Yes
>>21959895Women may want a nice skinny pretty boy but they need a fat ugly bastard like me
I tried making it at home but it was nowhere near as good as a proper 'go 'za. What's the secret?
>>21959900Chicago water, tough luck
>>21959895I am in my 30's and have never had this because it's not a thing in my country :( And I watch a lot of food shows so I am constantly pained by the food I can not have unless I travel to America. Like I might not even like a deep dish pizza, but if I never have it I can't have an opinion on it and it pisses me off so much.
>>21959900You can't really make good pizza at home because conventional ovens don't really get hot enough
>>21959895FUCK I think I get it now.It's like a cheese pie, with a ragu on top. We tend to add something to our cheese pies: spinach, potatoes, chard. I wonder how well that would work.
>>21959907Chicago 'za does not require insane temps unlike normal 'za. You can definitely bake one at home.>>21959900Never made it, but I guess considering the ratios of dough (much ticker), cheese (lots more of it) and toppings, you need to play with the saltiness and acidity of everything to make it work well.
>>21959910It's like if they tried to make a budget savoury cheese tart, with pizza dough and the wrong kind of cheese. And then layered pizza sauce and pepperoni/sausage on top.
>>21959907Maybe you can't. I can.
>>21959920that crust doesn't look pizziolo level at all
>>21959898Don't forget to mention you're old, hairy, and balding and also a janitor
>>21959922But that's not what you said. Now you're moving the goalposts.
>>21959924NGL bros, I am actually a woman who also happens to frequent the cooking boards and I have to say old hairy balding janitors are actually like so my type!!!
>>21959926it looks good, but the rind isn't super well developed
>>21959950Any chance you're in London?
>>21959960Back to /fit/ you walking piece of cardboard
>>219599003 tsp active dry yeast¾ cups water at room temperature1 tbsp granulated sugar3 cups all-purpose flour and more for dusting1 tsp salt6 tbsp butter unsalted and softened⅓ cup olive oilmix together in bowl, wrap in plastic and cure for two days in fridge2 tbsp olive oil20 oz local tomatoes quartered1 ½ cups canned tomatoes crushed2 tsp Italian seasoning1 tsp garlic powderSalt and ground black pepper to tastereduce in saucepan to thick saucepreheat oven to 42525 slices pepperoni can add extra for garnish1 cup green bell peppers chopped, can add extra for garnish1 lb mozzarella cheese grated and at room temperature Parmesan cheese grated, for garnishor whatever for fillingsroll out dough 2/3rds of dough for bottom crust, lay in springform panfill with stuffings and cheeseroll out top 1/3, lay over pizza, top with sauce and bake for ~40 min.This is the best recipe I've ever found and I think the secret is curing the dough for 48 hours.
>>21959895>Pizza may have been born in ItalyIt wasn't though. It's an American creation through and through
>>21959895i don't know why you feel the need to be wrong.
>>21959974>peetha is an Amewican cweeashunOh the boredom..
>>21959895She? My pizza has a massive cock
>>21959960Uuhhh NO, I am a model living in paris. France, not Texas! Anyways, since I am a hot model... I do sometimes take trips to London for modeling gigs and what have you and to party with my cool jet setting friends and stuff!!! Are you by any chance a hot old hairy balding janitor living in London anon???
>>21960043Great. I've got a massive cock. I don't mean massive but it's nearly 20cm and pretty fat. I've sent dick vids to women where you very got a semi and I smack it and it goes round the clock, and they love it.
>>21959907retard
>>21959895You can't post this, they'll kill you for telling the truth.
>>21959914>two things look vaguely similar so that means they were meant to be the sameFucking retards on this board, I swear
>>21959895Americans just do anything with potato, tomato, corn, and beans better. Italy didn't even use tomato commonly until like the the 1830's. They call it tradition while their great grandmother's had strange foreign fruit that most of the other villagers were using for animal feed alone. But her goat got into her cupboard, shit in the flour one morning, and dinner still needed to happen still.
>>21959959Fuck, you are such a loser.
>>21960161This sort of post is pretty much just robotic now. Beep boop bap brzzzz. Reading anons spewing out their obnoxious lowbrow posts.
>>21960049NTA but it is true. I mean you can make a nice pizza at home but it will never taste the same as one from a commercial oven.
>>21960260Not him but your post is projection and you're the one with the lowbrow post. If we're going by the "historical foods that vaguely resemble pizza" then pizza is much more an israeli invention than it is italian.
>>21960270>what are some tips/secrets to make pizza like this if you want to stay thin and healthy?umm... anon.... i hope this is bait, for your own sake.
>>21960279Yes, ignoring a multitude of historical documents. But keep throwing pwojection in there. The complete bottom of the barrel of retorts. Absolute bottom feeder. And the reason you're getting all shitty is because someone didn't nod and smile when someone falsely stated that pizza is an Amewican invention. You're there hand on chest singing the national anthem, all misty eyed, like some fawning little bootlicker and somebody spoiled that for you. So you lash out viscerally like a hormonal adolescent. Pitiful really. Pwojection...
>>21960294uhh, anon... meats and cheeses are some of the most calorically dense foods and will also make you fat and kill you. low glycemic index carbs are good for everyone regardless of lifestyle. high GI carbs are good for cardio. >How can you be on /ck/ all these years Shit brain..... The point was you're not going to get what you ask for because it doesn't exist. You want a pizza for fatasses that won't make you fat and I want a woman who won't nag my ear off.
>>21960294kill yourself retard
>>21960302Ur butthole, bro... Who blasted it so badly?
>>21960321LMAO if you aren't baiting, you're extremely retarded. You're the obese faggot that can't stop stuffing his mouth with the most calorically dense food imaginable. I don't even eat pizza because I don't have a raped palate.
>>21960332You don't know what a low glycemic index carb is because you're an obese fuck that wants to shovel food into your mouth without thinking. You're asking questions about food like a fatass, because you don't know shit. Go lose weight, you self admitted sedentary fatass that admits you think carbs are scary because you can't work out.
>>21960273>implying all "commercial ovens" are equalSure I get mogged hard by a great New York or Neapolitan pizza place but I would take my homemade pizza over Pizza Hut or Dominos any day.
>>21960270>I've been wanting to try to eat healthier by making deep dish pizzasThis implies that you don't eat healthy. Horrible troll poster.
>>21960355Name a low GI carb without looking it up: oh nevermind, you already failed by mentioning "bread" while I was talking about low GI carbs. Kill yourself you dumbfuck hillbilly. Flyovers getting internet is almost half as bad as india getting internet. Put yourself in the fucking hole already stop waiting for your shit diet to put you in.
>>21959926nice undercarriage
>>21959906>I might not even like a deep dish pizzathis isnt possible. the only people who claim to not like it havent had it, or they say they dont like it for some reason that has nothing to do with it's flavor.anyway, just make your own.
>>21960273retard. deep dish is baked at like 350 you stupid retard. it's not done high like a flat pizza because you bake it like a literal pie, the whole thing has to heat through.
>>21959895
>>21960484The comment you relied to said pizza at home, he didn't specify deep dish.>>21960482>make your ownI likely will but if I've never had it from a proper place how will I know if it tastes right.
>>21959895Idk man, chicago pizza makes me a little bitch. I can only eat like one slice every 3 years because it is just about the heaviest matter in the universe that can fit in my stomach
>>21960497Find an old recipe for a leavened quiche dough, use whole milk mozzarella, then top it with a slightly cooked marinara
>>21960522Haha just wait for that second ball to drop kiddo
>>21960301Dayum now that be pizza
>>21959926>no Gimboloney's 24 'Carrot' pizza leaf
>>21960528Ok but when my second ball drops my cooldown timer for eating a chicago pizza slice isn't gonna be reduced by half, gramps.
>>21960543Watch it or you'll get a knuckle sandwich
>>21960569I don't believe you. I'm trying to send you a PM to tell you a piece of my mind, but I can't figure out where the send message button is. I have a bone to pick with you.
>>21959906Just order a Lou Malnatti's online, or Giordano's. Stick with Spinach or Pepperoni. The Italian beef on at the latter's decent as well.
>>21960455Nice try, but dieting is a mental illness and if you're restricting yourself then you've already lost the game.
>>21960457Fuck off back to redd*t
>>21960531Why does she have all those cuts on her butt
>>21960497>The comment you relied to said pizza at home, he didn't specify deep dish.this thread is about deep dish pizza, retard, and he was obviously responding to the OP which has a big picture of a deep dish pizza on it.
chicagoans don't even consider the deep dish to be their pizza. tavern sausage square cut is what the locals actually eat.
>>21960929cutters gonna cut
>>21960579Why I oughta!
>>21960934>tavern sausagedidnt ask about your glory hole
>>21960934>tavernUtterly meaningless.
>>21959895Agreed. Chicago deep dish is the king of pizza. All other peasants may kneel and kiss the ring.
>>21960934>>21961057>>21961058Would it kill you niqqers to post a picture of said tabern sausage pizza? You complete macaques
>>21961076Why? IYKYK
Here, I'll do your fucking job, you melanin-rich subhumans
>>21961081That just looks like a frozen Roma or Jack's pizza. I bet it tastes the same way, too.
>>21961085>I betOh look, some random retard "bets". We've got a connoisseur here
>>21961085I just got it from wikipedia, you got a better one?
>>21959895Why are you posting a casserole in a pizza thread?
>>21961230What's the point? Can you even pick that up? This looks like a mockery with none of the upsides of a real pizza.
>>21959895yes sir
Someone mentioned food (I'm outside your door)
>>21961081looks nicer than the deep douche pizza or whatever it's called
>>21960321skinny anon here hes right you know
>>21960929Maybe she sat down on the bench>>21960528WHERE THERE'S A KNIFE FOR NO FUCKING REASON
>>21960043Mods are cringe as fuck on /ck/. Peak redditors who hate anything that isn’t an ad for fastfood
>>21960045first I get a spicy meal inside of ya, then I put me spicy knob inside of ya.shpunk shpunk.
>>21959906You aren't missing much, most of what makes a pizza unique is lost in that form. I was sorely disappointed when I tried it multiple times. If you want something different than default pizza a pan pizza where it has a thick crust that is sort of burnt around the edges is far better.
>>21959950You may be a woman, but you, too, are fat old and balding!
>>21959900There's a pizzamaking forum which has people running around trying to blueprint the major 'go 'za 'zas.https://www.pizzamaking.com/forum/index.php?topic=38224.0https://www.pizzamaking.com/forum/index.php?topic=6480.0https://www.pizzamaking.com/forum/index.php?topic=7879.260>>21959905LOLNO. Chicongo water is heavily chlorinated and tastes horrible.t. sad Chicongo-area resident who can't wait for mom to croak so I can GTFO of this shithole area
>>21960308>uhh, anon... meats and cheeses are some of the most calorically dense foods and will also make you fat and kill you.>low glycemic index carbs are good for everyone regardless of lifestyle. high GI carbs are good for cardio.LOL NO FUCK YOUKeto is the healthy way of life. Grains were created by Satan-worshipping Jews to enslave and kill the goyim.
>>21960934Bullshit.>>21961076Go to your local grocery store.Buy a Red Baron or other mid-to-shit-tier frozen pizza.Take it home and bake it.Cut it in a grid-shaped pattern to form squares, typically around four to six cuts on each axis depending on how large the 'za is.Wa-la, you now have an accurate representation of "tavern style" pizza.That's literally it. This >>21961081 is the cutting style which somehow makes it "le tavern style" instead of "basic bitch premade frozen Sysco style cut in slices".
>>21960528Tastes like ass
>>21962719These and vegans are severely mental ill, it's difficult to read.
>>21959906I assume it tastes like a meatless lasagna cake desu.
>>21962719It's cute that you're ban evading because you have some neurotic need to show everyone how retarded you are. >>21962801It says a lot about you that you can't imagine anything existing between injecting pure lard into your veins and veing a vegan that eats grass all days. If you want to eat like an obese, retarded fatass faggot then go ahead. You don't need to ask for our permission.
>>21962801>It says a lot about you that you can't imagine anything existing between injecting pure lard into your veins and veing a vegan that eats grass all days. If you want to eat like an obese, retarded fatass faggot then go ahead. You don't need to ask for our permission.I eat a balanced diet, with great variety. I eat potatoes, grains, vegetables, fruit, meat, dairy etc. I don't know why that would make me obese or a retard. I think the retardedness comes when you avoid certain types of food and it becomes a big part of your life, so much so that yes it's a mental illness. And, to be honest, when you interact with one of them, you really that something went wrong and/or is severely missing from them to steer them down this zealous path.
>>21960934This is the truth actuallyDeep dish is for tourists and Wrigleyville hyperautists
>>21959970didn't taste like the one i had in chicago, but actually super tastyscrew the 'go 'za, i might prefer this
>>21961076my niggeroncini, if you're gonna go that far you may as well with a little niggerazzmatazz.
