>Don't pay my water bill
>No water
>Pay my water bill
>It's filled with toxic chemicals

>>150754875
>Put down parlay for Central City Cougars and Clevand Browns
>Should be easy money
>Gorilla takes over the stadium in the second quarter
If I had a dime everytime some stupid Gorilla ruined my day. I'd have like 4 which is way too many. We need to wipe Gorilla City off the fucking planet.

>>150754875
God is a hack.

>>150757794
Kill yourself for spreading lies on the internet. Just die. Die for Darkseid

>be me, proud gothamite
>visiting family in Metropolis
>city is eerie, just everything is too clean
>get thirsty, ask for some water
>drink it and nearly choke on it
nastiest shit I've ever had, just so clear and not a single hint of that minty Joker toxin aftertaste, how do people drink this stuff??

>>150754875
It's weird, because I have several memories that aren't really mine. I don't think so.
>I remember a life I never lived, and several apocalypses.
>I even remember an old article about Amazons, that said they creep on ships, basically seduce and kill the men, but I can't find it anywhere anymore.
>I remember batman having a daughter, but apparently he has a son instead...

Am I schizoing out, anons?

>>150754875
Got a discount on a blimp trip getting out of Gotham, from the J.K company, finally leaving this shithole.

>Be me
>Illegitimate son of Darkseid
>Yes, the big D himself
>Kept in secret
>No one knows about you other than father
>Get sent to Earth with the order to prepare for invasion
>Spend a year here. Learn the culture look for weaknesses.
>Yesterday
>Try sendng a report
>Learn from hacked heroshit communication channels that dad went for milk so hard he became another fucking universe or something
>Stranded on Earth
>Nothing to do
>Not enough alone to take over the planet
>Not gonna ask for help from earthlings because they would just backstab

Literally what the fuck am I gonna do with my life now? Am I just gonna argue with retards online and spend misinformation?

On an unrelated note. Did yall see the clip of Black Adam shocking his dog?

>The Joker on the TV.
>He tells the Batman in live television he will do something funny.
>Shoots the TV host.
>No joke, no punchline, he just killed a random guy.

What the fuck is up with millenials and thinking "lol random" is funny?

>>150758656
Joker used to just be an old Gotham mafioso, real serious motherfucker never even smiled, until batman beat the shit out of him. And kept beating the shit out of him. And beat the shit out of him harder every time he got back up or showed his greasepaint white face out on the town

All those concussions are what caused him to go from mostly harmless jokes to eating fetuses on the street corner.

Its all batmans fault. Happened to croc to, when my dad was in the Henchman biz, Waylon was a erudite and cunning mastermind. Nowadays the poor fuck can barely string together a sentence and eats raw meat like a godamn animal

>>150754875
>You live in the DC universe

What a horrible fate.

Amazons owe me sex.

>>150759004
Would Marvel really be much better?

>>150759682
In Marvel you can rape mutant cunny, in DC you can rape Amazon cunny.

>>150754875
>Apparently 60% of its economy is based on crime.
So... they're like the City of London?

>>150758656
>The Joker
>currently making millions with short form video pranks

>>150759682
>>150759710
Nope.

>>150754875
No thanks. I'm going to kms.

>>150759710
wouldn’t fucking a mutant risk your children becoming mutants

>>150759710
who the fuck wants a child with a disgusting mutie? Are you one of those fucks that are into that?