>billionaire with a ton of high tech gadgets who can also fight well>there's no way he could be batmanSuperheroes would have their identities revealed in days in real life.
>>151011420>Superheroes would have their identities revealed in days in real life.its practically a joke that the only one who cant figure out he is batman is commissioner gordonbut he also projects a persona of being 100% idle rich who needs a butler to get dressed in the morning because theres no way he is secretly a ninja
>>151011420>Bruce Wayne>Fights wellWhen has that pretty boy ever been in a fight? That twink would be fucking torn in half if he actually got in a fight. >Waynetech fancy gadgetsMy ass, Wayne can't even get a fucking electric car built and you want me to believe his company somehow can build a stealth jet? Lmao!
The Batmobile should have a dozen news choppers following its every move.I loved the PowerPuff Girls parody where the Batmobile clone gets stuck in commute traffic.
>>151011487>that>twinkAnon, i think you either need your eyes checked or you have weird standards
>>151011504He's smaller than Clark Kent and that fucker is just a news reporter.
>>151011420The disguise works because Batman fights for the 99% and no one would expect a member of the 1% to be a class traitor.
>>151011504You know Wayne's just got glamor muscles. He lifts to look good not for function.
>>151011420Everyone is pretending Bruce isn’t Batman it’s the only logical explanation.
>>151011420> billionaire with gadgets> implying he invents themdude has thousands of nerds working for him for defense contracts, he just collects checks because he's a nepo baby> can also fighthe's just a rich fuck like bezos or luthor, they have bodyguards. he's also too busy smashing starlets and models. he was at some dumb charity even last night getting wasted > the absolute DDIQ of OP thinking bruce wayne is the goddamn batman
>>151011512clark was a farm boy growing up and they fed that kid to make him fit as a linebackerwayne is still, like, 6'2" and 220lbs. He might act like a rich dandy but he's big
>>151012696Also I'm pretty sure Bruce Wayne rapes those """wards""" he keeps adopting and beating the shit out of pedos is like 60% of what Batman does. It's kinda scary that there's a pedophile in Gotham so powerful that not even Batman can touch him.All we can do is hope that president Luthor gets the DOJ to release the Wayne files soon.
Loved that guy’s reaction in Batman Returns>Bruce Wayne…why are you dressed like Batman?
>>151011527It's just roids and he's not even hitting the gym so he's getting minimal gains and a weird, thick neck
>>151011420All the mma teachers in the world, the """"best"""" lifecoachs. the hypeman hanger ons, the most submissive bigcocked underage prostitutes of Bangkok don't mean SHIT without street experience. I bet I could break that twinkboy Wayne same way Bane broke Batman in CapeMania XCIII
>>151011420>Guys, it's so obvious between being a billionaire/celebrity, Trump roams around the streets of New York and fights people and he's like a Ninja!
>>151011420You can't even keep track of what your own leaders are doing without the answer being a conspiracy and speculation.
>>151013463I mean, Trump is old and fat. It's more like if The Rock turned out to be a superhero. You wouldn't exactly suspect him first but at least you could kinda see it.
>>151012868lmao that's great anon
>>151013463You're right, I'd be fooled
>>151011420To be fair we have witness the safe keeping of a massive pedoring that to this day has never been fully disclosed. It might be totally possible for Bruce to keep his alter ego hidden.
>>151011512>Anything smaller than the Kent mountain that stands out in the Daily Planet crew like a sore thumb, is a TwinkAt that point just use "normal person".
>>151013856It's a fat suit. You're a fooled sheep.
>>151013463
>>151011420"Guys, do you know that Batman, the dude who fights crime and goes against the corrupted elites of Gotham, was actually a multi-billionaire playboy who barely worked in his life and was constantly pampered by his butler?"There are stupid videos of people who think that alternative identity wouldn't work, despite the fact that we do actually have people living a double life throughout history; decades ago people even went on to have a secret 2nd family, which is harder to juggle than being a masked vigilante.
>>151011489Well, depending on the continuity, the batmobile has secret entrances all over gotham or at least one out of the batcave. Also, cars get lost in copter chases all the time.
>>151011420But is he still rich, right?
>Everyone saying this stupid shit about Bruce Wayne.Let me tell you people something. Do you fuckers think a technologically advanced super utopia would fail to recognize how their own seismographs and magnetic fields were fucking up from their planets core going unstable?Hell no. Rich boy got himself injected with super powers because he was jealous of the Bat, flew off to Metropolis to fight crime, and fooled you all with a bullshit origin
>>151011420It would make more sense if Wayne was hiring and funding various vigilantes to be Batman and replacing them when they are inevitably killed in action or seriously injured. Because there is just no way batman is constantly surviving all those gun shots, bomb explosions, Joker and Scarecrow poison events etc. It's pretty clear that Wayne enterprises is funding the whole Batman project to clean up Gotham and remove the organized crime. I just seriously doubt it's one guy doing all of it. and going out every single night and getting shot at. It has to be some revolving door of ex special forces guys putting on the goofy mask and beating up costumed goons.
>>151011420There was a thing like that in the batman 2004 show where a AI named Dave was able to figure out from deducing who would have enough money to do it, who would fit the build, and who would have the motivation
>>151013463Trump 2000 would have been a kino period, i swear.
>>151016550Wasn't that the actual "legit" cover story for Iron man in the comic? That he was working for Tony and was his bodyguard originally?>>151016972Now you have me picturing Donald Trump as the Red Hulk. Actually, I don't think I can picture Trump actually getting genuinely angry at anything, so blasé he is at his age.
>>151011420>billionaire with a ton of high tech gadgetsAccording to who
>>151017466Yeah, from the beginning to the mid 90s or so Iron Man was a Stark employee hired to act as head of security and personal bodyguard to Tony after he was kidnapped.
>>151011420Good thing it ain't real life then lol
>>151011420>billionaireyep the public would know this>with a ton of high tech gadgetshe's usually a generic philanthropist>who can also fight wellhe would not let this get out
>>151011420Comics are not real life
>>151017466The things that would get trump mad would be delivering his McDonald’s late or postponing his golf trip.
>>151018561Tony was still keeping up the secret identity into the early 21st century even as the writers were acknowledging how obvious it was (since every story has some kind of situation where Iron Man acts with a genius that only Stark could have). I think the MCU finally killed the secret identity but it's surprising to me how long it lasted.
>>151011420It would be swiped under the "conspiracy theory" rug in no time.Pretty sure Batman himself would be spreading some of those too.In the post-truth era anything and everything can (or can't) be true (or false), simple as.
>>151011420That reminds me of this.
>>151016550In the episode Almost Got him, they say, “He gets around for one guy.” “Nah, Gorden has a whole SWAT team of them somewhere.”
>>151013856what if he had a magical girl transformation like shazam, or bendis?
>>151016972Some redditor made this and got several thousand people to clap their hands like babies
