/co/ slept on one of the most unhinged comic book adaptations ever made, so today I will remind them.Season 1>Archie, Betty, Veronica, Jughead and Cheryl Blossom investigate the murder of Cheryl’s twin brother Jason Blossom, shot in the head and dumped in the river.>Archie is having an affair with his music teacher Ms. Grundy, who is actually a child predator who stole the real Ms. Grundy’s identity to keep grooming teenage boys.>Veronica father Hiram is a mobster who wants to take over Riverdale for a different reason each season.>Archie’s father Fred is divorced from Archie’s lesbian mother Mary and begins fucking Veronica’s mother Hermione, who is estranged from Hiram.>Betty’s parents Hal and Alice are so controlling she manifests an evil split personality named “Dark Betty” when she puts on a black wig.>Jughead is an edgelord whose father FP is the leader of a local drug-dealing biker gang, the Serpents.>Cheryl is a closeted lesbian mean girl whose parents Clifford and Penelope are the richest family in town.>Josie and the Pussycats are an all-black girl group until Josie ditches the other two to go solo.>Betty's gay best friend Kevin is addicted to cruising the woods for sex with closet cases.>Archie hooks up with Veronica and Betty hooks up with Jughead.>Betty finds out Jason got her sister Polly pregnant and their parents locked Polly up in a convent because Hal and Clifford are cousins, making Jason and Polly’s relationship incest.>Jason found out Clifford was pushing drugs through the Serpents and threatened to expose him if he didn’t let Jason and Polly run away together.>Clifford shot Jason and blackmailed FP into getting rid of the body with plans to frame FP for the murder, but the gang exposes Clifford and proves FP’s innocence.>Penelope kills Clifford in retaliation and frames it as a suicide. >Cheryl tries to commit suicide as well, but the gang saves her.
>>152000945It gets absolutely fucking insane.
>>152000945Ironically, the Sirs did it better.
Season 2>Riverdale is terrorized by the Black Hood, a serial killer targeting the town’s sinners and who wants Betty to become his apprentice.>Archie forms a vigilante group to hunt down the Black Hood and later becomes Hiram’s capo, but regrets it when he learns Hiram wants to build a private prison in Riverdale.>Jughead becomes the new leader of the Serpents and gets them to stop pushing drugs, so Hiram recruits their rival gang, the Ghoulies, to terrorize the town and frame the Serpents.>Clifford’s twin brother Claudius appears and conspires with Penelope to send Cheryl to gay conversion therapy at the convent so they can take over her inheritance, but she escapes, comes out and begins dating biker girl Toni Topaz.>Penelope later kills Claudius to become the sole master of the Blossom fortune.>Archie and Betty expose the school janitor as the Black Hood and briefly hook up. It later turns out the Black Hood framed the janitor and is still at large.>Betty finds out Alice and FP dated in high school and had a son they gave up for adoption. She tracks down her half-brother Chic and learns he is an addict and a gigolo.>It later turns out Chic was her real brother’s boyfriend, killed said brother and stole his identity, so Betty arranges for the Black Hood to kill him.>Betty learns her father Hal is the Black Hood and arrests him.>Archie and Jughead prevent the Ghoulies from destroying the town and clear the Serpents.>Fred runs for mayor against Hermione, but loses.>Hiram frames Archie for murder and has him arrested.
>>152000945>be ticklefag>have to endure Tickled doc>entire fetish is known for being faggot blackmail racket>watch this>guess what
Season 3>Archie is locked up at Shankshaw Penitentiary, where he must join an underground bloodsport tournament sponsored by Hiram. He later escapes and flees to Canada, but returns to Riverdale to face Hiram after surviving being mauled by a bear.>Betty and Jughead investigate a string of suicides caused by Gryphons & Gargoyles, a fantasy board game created by the demon-worshipping nuns at the convent and weaponized by a masked mastermind called “the Gargoyle King”.>Hiram has been spiking the water supply with drugs to make the teens hallucinate and drive them to suicide so he can have Riverdale quarantined under his stewardship, but the gang stops him.>Hiram is shot and Archie becomes the prime suspect, but it turns out to have been a hit ordered by Hermione, who found out Hiram had been cheating on her. Hiram is later arrested, but escapes prison with Hal.>Betty learns Alice, Polly, Kevin and others have joined the Farm, a cult led by Edgar Evernever and his wife Evelyn Evernever, who masquerades as a student to groom teenagers into the cult. They are secretly harvesting the members’ organs to sell on the black market.>Jughead’s mom Gladys and his sister Jellybean move into the town, while FP becomes the new sheriff. Gladys attempts to take over the drug trade, so Jughead later runs her out of town.>Alice turns out have beeen undercover to help the FBI dismantle the Farm and her handler is her and FP’s son Charles, who is alive after all.>Edgar has been using the money from the organ trade to build himself a spaceship and attempts to escape in it, but Alice shoots him dead, while Evelyn is arrested.>Cheryl learns that Penelope is running a brothel and having an affair with Hal, whom she later kills. Penelope is the Gargoyle King, with Chic as her enforcer.>They abduct Archie, Betty, Veronica and Jughead, who survive a series of deadly trials and expose Penelope and Chic. He is arrested while she is entombed by Cheryl.>Veronica opens a bar.
>>152000945>>152001002>>152001064What in the fuck
>>152000945god damn Josie a cute
Season 4>Fred dies in a car accident, and Archie decides to honor his memory by becoming a masked vigilante and protecting the local children from a family of drug-dealing criminals.>Archie also meets Fred’s estranged brother Frank, a former black ops operative, and must protect him from government assassins.>Betty becomes an FBI trainee under Charles and discovers she has “serial killer genes”. She also learns that Charles and Chic are in cahoots to torment Alice for abandoning Charles and arrests them.>Veronica meets her evil half-sister Hermosa from one of Hiram’s extramarital affairs and gets into a patent battle with Hiram over the family’s rum recipe, but they make amends after Hiram fakes a degenerative disease.>Cheryl digs up Jason’s corpse and believes she can communicate with it. She accidentally kills relatives who find out and ropes Toni into covering up their murders, leading to their breakup.>Kevin begins producing tickle fetish videos.>Jughead is accepted into a prestigious boarding school and inducted into a secret society of aspiring writers from which his estranged grandfather was once expelled, and wins a contract to ghostwrite a popular series of mystery novels over his colleagues Bret and Donna.>Donna and Bret conspire to murder Jughead and frame Betty, but the gang realizes their plot and fakes Jughead’s death to acquire evidence against them.>Turns out that Pendleton, the author of the mystery novels, stole his idea from Jughead’s grandfather and also killed Donna’s grandmother, and Donna orchestrated everything to use Betty and Jughead to expose the truth.>Someone called “the Watcher” begins blackmailing the townspeople with incriminating videotapes. The gang finds out Jellybean is the Watcher and FP moves her away from Riverdale.>Archie and Betty fall for each other but decide not to hook up for Veronica and Jughead’s sake.>The gang graduates and Archie joins the military.
>>152001135>Archie joins the military.uh-oh, look out vietnam
Season 5>Five years later, Archie is a veteran with PTSD from the war and Betty is an FBI agent with PTSD from being held captive by the Trash Bag Killer, who keeps sending her taunting letters.>Veronica is married to Chad, an abusive banker who attempts to kill her when she decides to divorce him, forcing her to kill him in self-defense.>Jughead is a washed-up alcoholic writer being stalked by his ex-girlfriend whose contributions to his novel he neglected, and haunted by memories of a "Rat King" who turns out to be a homeless man who was eaten alive by rats in front of him while he was too drunk to help.>Cheryl believes the spirit of Julian, her other twin she absorbed in the womb, is possessing a doll and haunting the mansion.>Penelope escapes from her tomb and becomes a faith healer, and Cheryl joins her following, but later takes control of it.>Hiram is now the mayor of Riverdale and wants to mine Palladium from underneath it. After several failed attempts to sabotage Archie’s renovation efforts, the entire population gets together to run him out of town.>Polly has become a truck stop hooker and is killed by a serial killer. Betty launches a rogue investigation and is fired from the FBI.>Jughead investigates extraterrestrial activity in Riverdale and discovers that the “Moth Men” terrorizing the town are actually inbred offshoots of the Blossom family who have murdered Polly and several other women.>Cheryl learns her great-grandmother Abigail Blossom was a witch burned at the stake by the ancestors of Archie, Betty, Veronica and Jughead and demands an apology. When they refuse, she places a curse upon the city, just as bomb planted by Hiram destroys Archie’s house, where Archie had been keeping a sliver of Palladium.
yucky show for g*rls
Season 6>The magic of Cheryl’s spell and the science of Archie’s Palladium splits reality in two, creating a parallel universe called Rivervale where Cheryl performs human sacrifices, Toni becomes La Llorona and Jughead and Veronica sell their souls to Satan.>Rivervale Archie is driven insane and attempts to keep altering reality to revive his father, forcing Rivervale Jughead to lock himself in the gang’s sex bunker to keep writing the stories of Riverdale in order to keep the Multiverse stable.>In Riverdale, the gang survives Hiram’s bomb and learns that the Palladium has given them superpowers: Archie is super-strong and invulnerable, Betty can see people’s auras, Jughead is a telepath, Veronica has a toxic kiss and Jughead’s new girlfriend Tabitha Tate can time travel.>Cheryl is now possessed by Abigail, but the gang manages to exorcise her and lock her in the Julian doll, after which Cheryl manifests fire powers and the ability to resurrect the dead.>Percival, an immortal warlock who fled from the Rivervale reality to escape a debt with Satan, arrives in town with plans to build a cursed railroad that will unleash Hell of Earth, and the gang must stop him.>The Trash Bag Killer targets Betty again, but she manages to kill him, and discovers she inherited the serial killer genes from Alice and not Hal.>Percival convinces Alice, Frank, Kevin and several others to join him.>The gang discovers that Toni’s newborn son Anthony is Riverdale’s guardian angel and Percival wants to sacrifice him to complete his plan. They manage to age Anthony into adulthood and he destroys Percival’s physical body in Riverdale, exiling his spirit back to Rivervale where Satan claims him.>With his dying breath, Percival summons a comet to destroy Riverdale. With no other option, Cheryl uses magic to reset the timeline back to the 1950s, with everybody being teenagers again and only Jughead remembering the truth.
>>152000945Oh awesome. Like a twin peaks. Sounds nice and grounded. Good for archie>>152001241What the fuck
>>152001241>Jughead is a telepath
Season 7>Tabitha becomes Riverdale's new guardian angel and tells Jughead they must create a better past to ensure that the future where Riverdale is destroyed doesn't happen, then erases his memories.>Archie is torn between basketball and poetry.>Betty explores her sexuality and discovers feminism.>Jughead writers horror comics and fights critics who claim they're a bad influence on teens.>Veronica renovates the town’s old movie theater and discovers a passion for the arts.>Cheryl struggles with her sexuality and her attraction to Toni.>Kevin struggles with his sexuality and his attraction to another student, Clay.>The gang investigates the murders of the parents of their friend Ethel at the hands of a sinister Milkman.>It later turns out Ethel is Hal's illegitimate daughter. Alice divorces Hal and offers to adopt Ethel, but she declines and moves away.>The Milkman was an assassin hired by Clifford and Penelope, actually Soviet spies. The gang exposes them and they are arrested.>Tabitha returns and announces that with their actions, the gang has defied racism, sexism and homophobia and changed the future.>Everybody gets their memories back and Archie, Betty, Veronica and Jughead become a polycule.>Archie moves to California to become a railroad worker, marries a nice girl and starts a family.>Veronica moves to Hollywood and becomes a successful film producer, but never marries.>Jughead opens his own successful comic book label, but never marries.>Betty launches her own successful women’s magazine, but never marries.>Cheryl and Toni get together and become activists.>Kevin and Clay get together and become theater directors.>On present day, an elderly Betty returns to Riverdale with her adoptive granddaughter, being the last surviving member of the gang.>After revisiting her childhood home in the now-abandoned town, Betty passes away and reunites with the gang in the afterlife modeled after their teenage years.
I was shopping at an Ollie's store earlier this year and I found some official merch book about this series (which I had never heard of) and was amused to imagine some grim Archie reboot.Thanks for posting this thread.
least asinine CW series
So how accurate is this to the comic
>>152001446110%
>>152001446More than you'd expect.
>>152000945Probably the last broadcast TV show I watched regularly every week.Spoilers: the show ended with them retcon into the 1950s with Betty and Veronica bisexual and in a polycule with Archie and Jughead who were straight.Then they died by the time of the 2020s
>>152000998I’m more likely to give this a shot tee bee aitch
>>152001310So Tabitha sending Penelope in the past made her a psycho Soviet spy.Felt sorry for her.Plus Cheryl’s twin is never born. Instead the other twin is born.
This was made by a crackhead
>>152000945Baywatch Nights (when it went from "Baywatch, but crime/detective-themed" to "X-Files ripoff with cryptids, aliens, ghosts, frozen Vikings, time travel, demons, etc.") is the only thing I can think of that is even remotely close to how insane the reinvention of this show was.
>>152001910She was already a psycho madam cult leader anyway.
>>152001335Edgy, sure. But I can't in good conscience consider this grim.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FsWS5NKWnYUhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ySHmCMeCq9Ahttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRX8jgCo2T0
>>152001002We used to have threads all the time about it on /tv/ I remember because i had to hand make webms using ffmpeg. idk what season had Archie fighting as bear and a mob boss choking a kid out at a wrestling practice.
For me it's street fighter Archie.ttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1u2tfyXfqLw
>>152000945>>152001002>>152001064>>152001135>>152001188>>152001241>>152001310And people wonder why Fanfictions written by females are so unhinged.
>>152001233Fuck women
>>152001233
What about the plotline where betty becomes an underage camwhore? Someone post veronica's nipple in the shower.
>>152002427
>>152000945the problem is when you actually watch it, its boring and too self serious most of the time. Like yea its fucking crazy in theory but it becomes too absurd that all of this is happening while they are in high school with homework and teen schedules. Especially by season 3 idk im not saying I dont want it to be about crazy bullshit, and I dont want it to be a self aware comedy, but I think a 20 minute episode format with more individual episode plots would have been better. And you can still do that with all this crazy random bullshit season long arcs happening in the background kinda.
>>152000998Im just so surprised to find out that, not only do Indians have an interest in Archie at all,l but that they care so much they made their own movie out of it.
>>152001188>>Five years later, Archie is a veteran with PTSD from the war
>>152001241>an immortal warlock who fled from the Rivervale reality to escape a debt with Satan, arrives in town
>>152001310>>152001768so is this season meant to be like funny or is it serious? I legitimately cant tell I dont understand what they were going for with this ending. It doesnt seem to me like anyones character are rationally ended in a satisfying way with how they start in season 1 except maybe archie. The way they get their memories back sounds like a prank or something.
>>152000945I remember /co/ following along for quite a while (at least through season 3) before threads started to fall off as interest waned due to increasing levels of retardation
>>152001241Bro I gave up on season 2 or 3 I missed out on some crazy shit what the fuck
>>152000945This is what Archie was left with after the second and bigger Sonic/Mega Man crossover left them in deep debt to Sega and Capcom for all the character licensing.
>>152004791thats so dumb of them. They should have focused on using the sonic license for profit and they had it forever so wtf were they doing??
>>152004834Seeing the relative success of the first crossover and thinking they can do it again but even bigger and better.
>>152004883yea but all thru the 90s and 2000s they never turned a profit or what?
>>152000998Redpill me on this
What the fuck, I had a friend who swore this was awesome. THIS was what he was watching?
>>152005107I can see someone thinking that if they literally do not consume any other media and kinda just watch it in isolation
>>152000945>Make a musical episode>It's awkward and clunky, trying to jam a pre-existing musical into the story>It fucking sucks and everyone hates it and it gets low ratings>They decide to keep doing it each seasonThe absolute madmen>>152001310Don't forget that Jughead is the one who pens their afterlife, and the very end of the show is him telling (you) that he'll leave them here, to be untroubled and happy. It's honestly bittersweet.>>152001910The other twin explores his gay side with chic and they both die to hatecrime/aids if I remember right, some sorta ultimately dark "justice" for them.
>>152004557It's meant to be more light-hearted and "Riverdale as it's better known", so campy funny I guess but still face value. The timelines and amnesia and guardian angel stuff is just to keep the plot "consistent". Jughead alone knows something is up -> understands and gets mindwiped so he can be another Good Ol Riverdale stooge. From then it's just basic cheeky Archie moments but with cracks of deeper thought and less than proper behavior; think light Pleasantville touches. That's likely no mistake either, all of Riverdale's seasons pay homage to many different stories. The end is mostly sincere and bittersweet, no clue what the temporary polycule was for though, it was even short lived. A tongue in cheek "every ship wins" I guess? What's funny is Reggie, typically a light kind of school bully, has a few homoerotic moments with Archie (they're besties and watched porn together) and complains that he didn't get invited to the polycule.
>>152001241Well, this took a turn.
I kinda wanna watch this now.
>>152007225They wanted their own MCU I guess. An MCW.>>152007826There's truly nothing like it. It marks your soul. This world can be divided into Those Who Have Watched The Entirety of Riverdale, and everyone else.
>>152000945/co/ oddly enough will avoid discussing live action adaptations of comics if they're not capeshit or have a constant CGI mascot character presence (or Scott Pilgrim)Hell, this place would sooner discuss blatantly off-topic live action media like the Sonic movies
>>152001310>>152000945BUT WHAT HAPPENED TO RIVERVALE?
>>152006277I think Reggie is upset he didn’t get invited to the Archie/Betty/Veronica/Jughead polycule because:1: he and Archie had already fucked that prostitute Trula Twist together.2. Classically, Reggie is usually the fifth member of the Archie gang after Betty, Jughead, Veronica and Archie himself.
>>152009336We left the Rivervale reality and went back to Riverdale.
>>152000945We never did find out what happened to Moose after time shifted to the 1950s.We also don’t know what happened to Toni and Fang’s son.
Just as a reminderThere was going to be a CW series for the Powerpuff Girls but was cancelledIt could been just as deranged as RiverDale
>>152009459He also dated Veronica for a good while, and Betty was horny for him in the 1950s timeline. He got shafted for sure.
>>152000968Sometimes I forget that people having the evil gene was a plot point
>>152000945wait, this is season 1
>>152010703Which was ludicrous.Who had the evil gene, Hal or Alice?Hal was the serial killer.Alice’s bastard son had it. Betty had it but repressed it.So who did they inherit it from? Hal or Alice?
>>152001310IT KEEPS FUCKING GOING
>>152007225biggest fucking understatement
>>152002180He's trying so fucking hard not to laugh
>>152002180my fucking sides
>>152010817>>152010846That is the actual dialogue btw, even the "we are legion" part.
Thank you for posting the summary, OP. I only ever watched the first two seasons and I had no idea the show got this kooky.
>>152000945Archie Sonic and Archie Mega Man died for this
>>152004834They wanted to focus on their own in-house properties rather than licenseshit Mega Man declined hard in sales, the over usage of licenses bled them money, and the Penders shit (followed by Fulop) didn't helpArchie Sonic being cancelled was an amputation or a jettison
>>152000945https://youtube.com/watch?v=42fAL-1GtjE
>>152009556>Townsville girls are grown ass women like in Riverdale but instead of still being in high school they're still in kindergarten
How much of this magic shit was originally gonna be for Sabrina?
>>152011413kek
>>152000968I stopped watching somewhere around s3/s4 the first time around, but I recently started a re-watch and I'm currently about halfway through s2. It's amazing how even in the more "grounded" seasons you get all kinds of crazy shit happening.I heard it goes completely off the rails fucking bonkers later on, and I'm honestly looking forward to it.
>>152011364>They wanted to focus on their own in-house properties rather than licenseshitThey had to. They had no money left to license with.
>>152011516Sabrina was clearly meant to show up earlier and have Chilling Adventures of Sabrina happen alongside it, but the Netflix split messed that up. She's in a couple episodes of Season 6, though. Involved with the witch stuff.
>>152009556They made a Sabrina series that was connected. It was actually pretty cool but then it got what I'll call "Riverdale'd". Characters got more batshit, ships got subversive, and for whatever fucking reason they added moments for the characters to sing and dance.
>>152011413GrossFunny but gross
>>152012273Chilling Adventures of Sabrina is based on the same-titled comic series produced due to the success of Afterlife with Archie. It's more akin to a reverse Riverdale as the tv show is much more lighthearted and whimsical than the comic.
>>152000945Didn't they stop putting it out on DVD after season two?
>>152013772they stopped putting everything out on DVD gramps
>>152013772BDs up to S3, but you can get the full series on DVD.
