In a bizarre and convoluted twist of fate you’ve somehow grabbed the attention of a viltrumite woman during their occupation on earth. With potentially the entire history of human art, music, culture, cuisine, creature comforts or even plain ol’ tenderness and affection at your disposal what would be your strategy to woo her and set her down a path of redemption and inner peace? Remember, the fate of the world is potentially in your hands!
Analingus
eating pussy would literally fold any viltrumite woman
>>153651524IMMEDIATE handholding correction
>>153651524>With potentially the entire history of human art, music, culture, cuisine, creature comforts or even plain ol’ tenderness and affection at your disposal what would be your strategy to woo her and set her down a path of redemption and inner peace?
>>153652039This. I imagine this worked really fucking well on the two guys that Thragg yelled at in the comic.
>>153651607Anilingus*
>>153651620Would human cunnilingus techniques even work on her? Her pussy would be hard as steel with enough grip strength to tear your tongue out.
>>153651524Rom-coms marathon.
>>153651524Eheh, he he... Uh, hey how's ot going?
>>153652138Imagine if Mark just held Anissa’s hand, instant infatuation
>>153651524>woo herShe should be wooing me, since she craves my seed
>>153651524>StrategyBro, you don't need strategy. It's literally so simple. So long as you have basic human empathy and you're a decent human being you'll be fine>4chanOh, right. Yeah, good luck.
>>153651524Can I get the hellspawn symbiote instead
>>153651524But she's already interested in me, why do I need to woo her? Anyway, instead of that gay redemption bullshit, I'd ask if they'd considered using their super-science to remove weakness via genetic engineering instead of murdering everyone.
>>153652861>So long as you have basic human empathy and you're a decent human being you'll be fineSo everyone here is fucked.But, like, in the bad way.
“Viltrumites are easy, just be nice to them!”
>>153651524>how would you make a vilty woman fall in love with you?While laying in bed I'd blow raspberries up into the air. When she hid under the covers I'd fart.
>>153652861You can have empathy and still be a miserable sadsack. I consider myself above the majority of people here and I still want to blow my fucking brains out.
>>153652305My guess is viltrumites are soft between the legs or else they wouldn't be compatible with humans
>>153651524We will interbreed.
>>153652305Evidently due to *SPOILER* they’re not nearly as strong on the inside
>>153656102Why do women look so annoying in this fuckass comic?
>>153651620good way to get your head accidentally crushed, you'd have to make sure you do it from behind where her thighs aren't around your head like a nutcracker
>>153652087Hallmark movies use this film as a playbook for every story beat now.
i wonder if femboy viltrumites exists
>>153657183Bussy addiction was too great of a weakness to be tolerated, sorry bro
>>153657270Damn :(
>>153657183If any ever did, they died during the Great Purge, and that's a big if.Viltrumite society is all about strength and hyper masculinity, there's a reason all men have mustaches, they don't allow the concept anything close to the femininity that is usually present in femboys.Even Viltrumite women seem to reject traditional femininity, not really bothering with their looks, and keeping their hair short or tied up. Thula is kind of an exception, but even then, she uses her braided hair as a weapon.There's no space for feminine women in Viltrumite society, and even less for feminine men.
Can I get mine in purple?
>>153657928She’s two years old you sick FUCK
>>153651524Kill Bill. A revenge story is easy emotional appeal, it's polished and choreographed to maybe impress her with the relative effort if not with the power levels. She'll nod and "yup" a lot at Pai Mei and then maybe collect swords for a while.
>>153658462Naw it's okay bro she's at least 5
>>153657806>If any ever did, they died during the Great Purge i hate it here
Show her recordings of one of earth's greatest fighters, Jackie Chan
>>153656647Kirkman is appealing to the cucks who read comics and want comics to be taken seriously as an artform.
>>153652861>just b urself
>>153651524I'd pretend she doesn't exist
>>153651524>ask her about her day and show basic empathy>she falls madly in love with youEasy
Do Viltrumites get jealous or are they more restrained than human women?
>>153660429All evidence suggests that female viltrumites are way, way more hardcore, aggressive and violent than their male counterparts. If you cheated on one, she'd probably fucking flatten you, your mistress and everyone in a five mile radius
>>153656684I'll have sea salt reinforce my head
>>153651524Give that bitch a foot rubBitches love foot rubs
>>153651524I do nothing. She'll just leave me for Chad soon enough.
>>153660602Now tell me the downsides
>>153663796Would you leave your dog who you love for a bigger dog?
>>153665469No porn. Ever.
>>153657183
>>153666962
>>153667068>>153667206Ok but what music would she like? Favorite pizza topping? Is she more of a fighting game fan or an RTS gal?
>>153651524>what would be your strategy to woo herThat would be the easy part.>you’ve somehow grabbed the attention of a viltrumite womanBut how would you even get to this point?
>>153665518You don't pet just one dog
>>153668313You said ‘Hi’ to her once
>>153668313You held a door open for her
>>153652861you say that normalfags have even a shred of empathy
>>153667206>>153667068>ai
Wouldnt it be incredibly easy? Considering Viltrumites have never been shown love their entire lifes, cant I just treat her nice like a normal gf and shed fold instantly?
>>153671973looks a 100x better then this >>153666962>>153666748>>153653437
>>153672070those pics are, by themselves, fundamentally better because they dont have the trademark ai artstyle that is fucking hurtful to look at.
>>153672255>western comics are bad because I saw this same artist too many times>anime is bad because the styles are too similarget a grip
>>153672305what the actual fuck are you talking about
>>153672741Ah, I see you are not cognizant. Don't talk to me any more.
>>153672813nigga, i said ai artstyle looks dogshit, and you start sperging out about some shit i never said. YOU are the non cognizant one here
I was only doing this because she has no art/bored not because ai art is good.
>>153673082ai art IS good. If ai wasn't real and some dude actually was drawing like this, he would have a million followers on twitter despite the flaws. People hate ai art because its ai not because of the way it LOOKS. Which is absolutely fair, but I have always hated people muddling the water and making shit up to push their narrative.
>>153673183If it was "good" it wouldn't be soulless. >>153666962Has soul
>>153652039I just think of that one scene from Project Hail Mary>Woah what is this!?>It’s called a hug. It’s not something one does themselves>What do I do?>Would you just get in here?>How do you know when the hug is done?>You just feel it>…Do you feel it now?>No
>>153673208Its an ego thing bro, you like novice art because its approachable it has nothing to do with "soul"
>>153663377You just want an excuse to touch a muscular girls feet don’t you anon
>>153666962>>153666974>no moustacheThat's the real reason why the Viltrumites would've purged this creature.
>>153673316I never implied otherwise
>>153651524She looks like she'd cry if you raised your voice
