https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JZL-YvHwP7M
>>154605015>72 views>9 hours agoThis is yours, isn't it?
>>154605015Neat!
>>154605015>eyelashes *ziiiiiiiip*
>>154605098I'm honestly glad this wasn't a Cartoon Fanatic video, those are truly dreadful.
>>154605015QUACK
Alright, constructive criticism time:This is definitely amateur but there are parts that worked for me. The turtle guy was funny, and some of the other jokes got a light exhale out of me.Overall my biggest disappointment is the fact it wasn’t fully animated. Like cmon man, I know that people do “pilot animatics”, but usually that’s because they make something 10+ minutes long with a lot of action and scene changes. Don’t tell me you couldn’t manage to fully finish a 3 minute long “pilot” where most of it is characters standing and talking. This absolutely could’ve been fully finished.The voice acting and sound were also lackluster and I think that really holds this back. The basic premise of a treasure hunt is kinda funny but there’s almost no reason it happens in the first place. The characters don’t really have motivation. Finding the glasses could’ve just been the plot, it at least gives the characters a goal.It’s not bad for an amateur but this feel far from finished. It’s like a decent enough college project. Work on polishing your writing and pacing and you could make something pretty good someday.
>>154605015Not bad, not bad.
>>154605015At least it was short.Why do you pretend this is an actual studio/registered company? They're less legit than LTT.comhttps://www.keyframezero.com/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-0B_1g5Rhc>professional>wagecuck who sucked dick for a job judging by her face and voice. Or maybe it's the HR.>>154609228Your criticism is pretty lackluster too, but you are working within his constraints which I dislike because you're teaching him his idea is good and his execution is just bad(which it is).>>154605015My criticism:Yet another slice of life show and misadventure show. And it isn't Dan Vs. I find it hilarious that 10-15 year olds want to voice 30-40 year old adults AND NOW that those said millennial grew up ... 30 year olds want to voice 8 year olds, including one that's trying to do a deadpan/Brian Griffin impression.Please see my thread on how to make a successful indie show even if it isn't what you want to make: >>154610271I ironically will say good job on not animating the whole thing so you don't waste budget into an idea that today's generation doesn't promote.I wrote and generated some pitch bibles for shows and I imagine myself in the position of Monkey Wrench's creator, imagine spending 50k-200k per episode only for nobody to watch it.The guy I put in charge of posting my art on Deviantart did get over 245 favourites and 30+ watchers, but there's one problem ... none of them bothered joining my Discord to actually discuss the pitch bible with me.I was under the impression that I will work with likeminded creatives on cartoons and the fans will want to interact with me, not "Yeah it's good." and no more replies, not even a "Hey can you continue this?". Really makes you want to throw all your pitch bibles into the trash if this is the state of things with the COMMUNITY not the companies. Oh God imagine the community being worse than the corporate companies.
>>1546050151:27This part feels like it's going to be exactly like one of those shows like Littlest Pet Shop where the song & dream sequences are far more interesting than the "normal" sections while ironically you're not putting any extra budget into these action/adventure/dream sequences.Also you need music ... and if you ever add music then always, but always put the background music in the foreground cause that's what good audio mixers do. They balance the vocals and music accordingly without one overpowering the other. That's why shows with mute characters like Courage are great for music, just like video games, cause there's no need to balance the vocals with the music.Monkey Wrench for example has horrible audio mixing. The show would be better if the characters went mute 50% of the time and the music instead played endlessly instead of being this weird mix of Mickey Mousing and song attempting to play but getting interrupted by the character talking.See Swat Kats for an actual good example of good audio mixing if you can find it in HQ quality and not the 480p on Youtube.And speaking of audio, raise the volume of the video itself up. I can barely hear what the character are saying when they're not yelling.If you want to see how fasttalking characters handle pronunciation then try Disney's Recess that's slice of life and try studying any action cartoon.And again I personally would go with a different idea than sitcom misadventures, but go ahead if you want to make it for yourself and your niche community. Just don't ask why the fish aren't biting.Mao Mao, Dan Vs, Regular Show are not exactly sitcom shows ... they have plenty of crazy shit happening.
>>1546050151:49 You can hear "the fish portrait" laughing that's a looped laughtrack that's very low volume compared to the duck's voice.
>>154610446>>154609139>>154606100Stop that
>>154610624stop what
>>154605015>Nerdy Duck Wouldn't DORKY Duck have made for a better name?
>>154612020This. Alliteration is all the rage in cartoons
>>154610522>I wrote and generated some pitch bibles for shows>generatedOpinion discarded>The guy I put in charge of posting my art on DeviantartHoly shit this fucking idiot can’t do anything himself. Except for type out long-winded posts that are also probably generated, lmao.Can I please know what your DA account is?
>>154605015>>154607889>>154612736Sup fagsshrekis.life/MH8IMX
>>154611218That
>>154614304Ah, okay. I'll stop then.
>>154612020"Nerdy Birdie" would also be a great title.
>>154614990Another great suggestion, thank you!
>>154605015OP you have to come to facts and realize that if you ever want to finish your cartoon and make it successful then you have to use AI
>>154607889do NOT
