There's a fucking cricket somewhere in my basement that won't shut the fuck up. I'm going absolutely insane. How long does it take these fuckers to die of starvation? Why won't it shut up!? WHAT THE FUCK is the matter with these wretched creatures. MOST ANNOYING SHIT EVER. WHY DO THEY MAKE THIS NOISE CONSTANTLYHOW CAN I LOCATE AND GET RID OF THIS THING? When I go down there it shuts up but otherwise it hasn't stopped chirping for like 4 hours now. I'm going insane! WHAT DO I NEED TO DO TO PREVENT MORE?! FFS i'm ready to buy a chicken coup and get chickens to get rid of this shit. I'm about ready to burn my fucking house down that's how annoying this little fucker is
>>2942390fire extinguisher, backing soda and vinegar volcano? crickets are low to the ground and want oxygen, so displace oxygen with other gas like carbon dioxide. But they also like heat so i assume it will be in a high corner near something warm like an outlet or day night sensor.holding a blanket behind and above your head should help with locating the cricket goal is to muffle the echos
>>2942400like crickets can not hold their breath or do not have a majority of their body weight devoted to gas exchange, you're not going to suffocate a cricket, it is screaming to get laid, add more crickets they will eat and fuck till all food is gone, no capacity for agriculture.add more crickets.
>>2942390Rent a hungry cat
>>2942400They climb shit.>Spent forever looking for a cricket>Ended up tracing it between the front door and the screen door>Look for a few minutes>Look up>Fucker is up in the top corner of the door
>>2942390
3 big cans of raid or equivalent. Phone with games, etc. Snax 1.5 literally bottle of cheap vodka?????¿??PROFIT!
The chirping seems to have stopped for now. I'm not sure why. Damn thing was going hard chirping every second for 4 hours then just hard stopped.>>2942421This, I'd go by the stairs and the sound sounded like it was coming from downstairs. Then I'd go downstairs and it sounded like it was coming from upstairs. Weirdest shit>>2942400The blanket part is a good idea. I don't know if I can gass out the cricket though. It almost sounded like it was hiding somewhere in my stairwell. I might try to use a blanket to isolate the sound. >>2942427Ohh I'd feel bad for the lizard though. I don't think they'd survive long term in my basement. I'm in an upper midwest state the basement is usually very cold even in the summer.I'm praying to God it doesn't start up again. I can't describe how annoying 4 hours of *chirp* *chirp* is sometimes several times a second.
>>2942511>I don't think they'd survive long term in my basementI've got an idea, Anon. Build a lizard oasis in your basement with a heat lamp and all the lizard accoutrements. Feed the lizard every other day and wait for the cries of the insectoid to cease.I just realized this is a reversal of the smoke detector chirp meme. That bug is a nigger. There's a nigger in your basement loudly calling you a stupid ass cracker honky. You gonna let him get away with that?
Play cricket sounds using your phone. He will reply thinking he is about to get laid..then you slowly track down the bastard wielding a piece of wood, kill him, remove his head and impale it on a wooden toothpick for all others criketsnto seeMake a statement
>>2942549>slowly track down the bastard wielding a piece of wood, kill him, remove his head and impale it on a wooden toothpick for all others criketsnto seekek>>2942525Oh this is so much worse than a smoke alarm chirp. It's like several chirps per second from one single cricket for hours on end. Most annoying shit ever. The smoke alarm chirp is like once every 5 minutes
OH FUCK IT STARTED CHIRPING AGAIN. NOOOOOOOOO :(
>>2942549>Play cricket sounds using your phone. He will reply thinking he is about to get laidThis actually did work. Unfortunately I think it might be inside my stairs somewhere. Or in the wall. It did definitely force the cricket to start replying but I just can't find it. My stairs are unfinished to the basement so it's like wood basically screwed together and there are gaps from whoever made it. sigh
>>2942556All you need is a Bluetooth speaker and a lizard wearing a cricket outfit. You better get that son of a bitch before it spawns a gorillion piccolos.
>>2942552Average cricket lifespan is 6-8 weeks.
>>2942560Dude I'm going nuts again. The fucker is back to chirping constantly. Going to be another rough 4 hours. I hate this so much. I hate it so much I might need to buy chickens for the yard to holocaust all crickets
>>2942562Drown it out with white noise like a fan or a jewtube video of a rain storm or waterfall or some shit.AI says:>Crickets hate strong, pungent scents such as peppermint, citrus, lavender, and vinegar, and they also dislike chili peppers and garlic. Additionally, they are deterred by conditions of dryness, which makes them avoid humid areas, and they are killed by food-grade diatomaceous earth, which dehydrates them.>Essential Oils: Mix a few drops of peppermint, citrus, or lavender essential oil with water in a spray bottle. Spray this mixture around entry points, such as windows and doors, to deter crickets.>Vinegar: A spray of diluted vinegar can also be effective in repelling crickets.>Chili and Garlic: Create a DIY repellent by blending fresh hot chilies or chili powder with water and dish soap, or adding crushed garlic cloves to the mix.Physical Deterrents>Sprinkle food-grade diatomaceous earth in areas of cricket activity. Its abrasive nature dehydrates and kills the crickets.>Boric acid, effective against crickets, can be used as a bait. It is a powder that, once ingested, causes crickets to starve.>Since crickets are drawn to moisture, using a dehumidifier can help make your home less appealing to them.>Seal any cracks or openings in your home's foundation and walls, and ensure screens are in place over vents to prevent entry.
>>2942561>Average cricket lifespan is 6-8 weeks.Yeah but how about with no food? I don't think there's anything to eat in my basement and in fact there are lots of toxic chemicals and dust down there.
>>2942567>they are deterred by conditions of dryness, which makes them avoid humid areasand>Since crickets are drawn to moisture, using a dehumidifier can help make your home less appealing to themCan't wait until AI serves as all 12 jury members in every trial.
>>2942568I bet you have cricket food in a cricket deep freezer you didn't even know about.
>>2942562There are noise detector apps for phones that will be able to find the decibels just walk around with it until it gets louder.Honestly "find the cricket" sounds like a great game, just call in sick from work tomorrow and go find the fucking cricket with a bottle of whiskey
>>2942568>no foodIf you have spiders in your basement and you also will have food for crickets
Omg guys. I just found it. It was hiding in a crack in the stairs. This was such an annoying game of hide and seek. The fucker would be chirping for hours and the second I walk down the stairs it shut up.I just found it though and it was in a crack. I sprayed it really good with aerokroil gun lubricant/de oiler. I think that's going to kill it. It can't clean itself now and it's so lubricated that the chirp probably won't anymore. Imagine trying to clean and you're soaked in gun oil/penetrant.WHEW,,, praying that did it
>>2942574>just call in sick from work tomorrow and go find the fucking cricket with a bottle of whiskeyI'm already drinking vodka and I can assure you it did not reduce the annoyance. Still super annoying sitting around waiting for it to start chirping then I walk over and it immediately stops.
>>2942578
>>2942580The idea with putting cricket noise on the phone helped me narrow down the location. It was less nervous with the cricket noise playing. Then I went back to the suspected location and found it an hour later.PEACE AT LAST
>>2942581Noice. I wonder what else could be lured out that way.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jofNR_WkoCE
>>2942572Yeah that's why I baked the bread here instead of asking "ai"
Just give em the ol' under arm, that'll fuck them off
>>2942580i like this photo
>>2942709
