ITT: amusing nicknames that tradesmen use for their tools / parts / supplies / whatever. I realize it’s not strictly /diy-related, but a lot of tradesmen frequent this board. Cable linemen call this lube “camel spooge” because it’s gooey and orange. Really funny to watch it blast out of a conduit with an air compressor on the other end.
This is a toner for RG6 / 11 / etc… a.k.a. the “crackpipe.” Hey Mike, can you pass me the crackpipe?
A gel-splice case that is crimped over a barrel splice, usually use to protect buried cable after it has been repaired. The “spooge coffin.” The manufacturer actually started dying their gel blue because of this.Last one just to get thread started. Tell me yours, let’s have a laugh.
cant be bothered to upload pics but- diagonal cutters are called dikes- jerry can nozzles are called donkey dicks- tamper detection paint is called birdshit- transmissions used to be called trannies
>>2952962We call it KY astroglide. Actually, it probably cones out of the same factory.
The terminal box on motors got called "pecker head" at a place I used to work at. Idk if it's standard or not.
I had a brief summer job in college working for a friend's aunt's asphalt resurfacing company. Her husband referred to the tar or whatever the black shit we were putting down as "gook". So we had gook buckets and gook brushes and had to try to keep the gook off of us.
We have 500' reels of fiber that we use in my job doing event production, the protective plastic sleeves around the end are referred to as dildos. If you have to connect two reels together, you're docking them.
The layer of impurities that sits on top of the wax and honey during extraction is called slum gum. Actually good for firestarting considering it's mostly shit tier wax and broken wood chunks.For mite treatment, we'd mix 6 tubs of crisco and food dye to make sure the clear treatment was all incorporated. Called that yogurtThen in high school, auto shop teacher called the grease tub next to the tire machine goober sauce bc it looked like peanut butter.
>>2952972I get peckerhead on motors as well. We’ve had much discussion about manholes and manways lately, and it’s 2025 and I like to be inclusive, so I call people on the radio and tell them to pass me a 9/16” wrench through the they/themhole.
In the painters trade if you want your white ceiling paint to cover better you tell the guy at the paint shop to put a shot of black in it.
>>2952962"I ran outta bullets"
>>2952962finally a reason to post this.
>>2953100Lots of SKF and picrel bearings around my place
>>2952962The "chinese finger trap" used for pulling cable is sometimes called a horse cock
>>2953128That’s funny. We call it the Chinese penis trap. The little clamps used to hold lashing wire are “bug nuts”The big clamps used to secure guy wire to utility pole bolts are “bitch clamps”The big roller wheel used for pulling cable at an angle are “snatch blocks”Clamp used for tightening guy wire is a “pork chop”When someone sees a hot chick walking by, they call out, “Squirrel!” to alert their coworkers without alerting the womanWhat else… circular saw is the Black n Decker Pecker Wrecker
>>2953125
>>2953068It’s at that point they know you are a pro.
>>2952962>donkey dick
>>2952966>donkey dickinflatable sewer plug
You know that advice that gets bandied around about how you should "join a trade"? This thread is a good reason to avoid trades.
>>2953245>donkey dickYou mean the Scepter Military Fuel Spout?These things age poorly and crack in storage. It was better to buy a self-priming siphon instead of using the spout. I even made one with steel NPT adapters that only needs a hose. Way more durable and serviceable.
>>2953322>edamäme: the postimagine running away to go cry in the porta shitter because somebody suggested putting some hair around it when you were fumbling around like a monkey trying to fuck a coconut trying to get a bolt started
>>2953322This right here is what we call a “faggot.”
>>2953128Came here to add Kellems herself and her world famous horsecock
>>2952966>>2953256>>2953245>>2953349>donkey dickhere's mine
Newfoundland metric wrench.
>>2953503That’s an Alabama Socket Set
we call WD40 and PB panther piss
>>2953140Snatch block is the technical term. Porkchops seem like something so specific that if they have a proper name, only Germans use it.
>>2952966>transmissions used to be called tranniesthey still are
>>2952962Always called these nigger dicks
>>2952991I also work in this field. IATSE journeyman. Can confirm this.
>>2953633A pork chop is a cable pulling clamp. It's also called a havens grip.
>>2952962Gaylords and Bungholes
>>2953125There is a high end bearing company called FAG out of Germany competitor to NSK, SKF, Nachi
>>2953939No shit, I was in inventory mode yesterday moving some FAGs around.
>>2953939>>2953944>Europe>FagsChecks out.
>>2953954Knee deep in FAGs today
Black asshole
This is a tool to pull bottom seal on along a garage door panel retainer. The official name is a Weenus.
>>2954455Are these the plugs that come with wire receptacles?
>>2953944>>2953217>>2953125this shit got me laughing way too hard
>>2953068>>2953240You guys sound like you know what you're talking about Talk to me about storing large quantities of imitation crab meat
Nigger wrench
>>2954857Is there something wrong with it or do you simply have to much?????
>>2954871We always called this one a Mexican speed wrench
>>2952962I have a coworker that everybody called "Keth". I just always thought that was his name. Only when I had to audit his team did I look at the employee roster and find out that his real name is "Keith". Thought it was some kind of spelling error in the employee roster until I figured it out. Keith was missing an eye.
>>2952962If you shoot black powder and have a caplock, you'll probably have a nipple wrench. Also, Superslick is a brand of trombone slide cream.
>>2953703>IATSE>4 days late to my postChecks out.
Be nice to your trade worker / utility worker.>Up in the bucket, splicing in new amp for a cable company’s line extension >Some Karen (not the my customer) comes outside in her bathrobe and starts bitching at me about her TV not working anymore>”Why didn’t you tell me this would happen? I was in the middle of a Zoom meeting!” Then starts swearing at me>this happens all the time, it’s my job, usually I’m nice about it >not this time>in order to function, new amp needs power output from previous amp down the line, have to drive away and find it, put a fuse in, usually takes about 2 minutes>find amp, gee, now would be a good time to take my lunch>an hour later I finish putting the fuse in, then I go back to new amp to balance signal>Karen comes out even madder than before, “what took so freaking long, I’m calling to complain about this, blah blah blah”>after she goes back inside, use my blowtorch to burn the shit out of her cable drop>from now one, whenever it rains, her service will go down
Not a tradie, but did some time in food service. Eons ago i was doing short order cooking at a truck stop. Some of the sauces were made in house, and a key ingredient was "Heavy Duty Mayonnnaise".Ive always wondered what sets HD mayo apart from regular.
>>2957470I think it's mainly a higher proportion of egg yolks than regular mayonnaise.For example:https://www.webstaurantstore.com/dukes-1-gallon-heavy-duty-mayonnaise/999992157.html>Best of all, this is heavy duty mayonnaise, meaning it contains more egg yolks and other ingredients than traditional mayonnaise.https://www.amazon.com/Hellmanns-Mayonnaise-Gallon-Extra-Heavy/dp/B00061ENRO>Hellmann's Extra Heavy Mayonnaise is made by adding extra egg yolks to our trade-secret real Mayonnaise recipe. This thicker, more eggy mayonnaise inspires passion and loyalty among professional chefs.
>>2953503Taiwanese micrometer
>>2957471So if i got normal mayo, and need HD, I just drop an egg yolk or 2 in? Wild.
>>2957471>This thicker, more eggy mayonnaise inspires passion and loyalty among professional chefs.This reads like a English translation of a Chinese productslop description.
>>2953501What is that actually?
>>2952966I've usually heard concrete vibrators called donkey dicks
That knead-able epoxy putty stuff that you can use for various breakages that is allegedly engineering grade....have heard it called monkey shit before.
Foreskin remover
>>2957490Waveguide for radio
>>2957583I'll be damned... I learned about something new today. Thanks anon!
>>2953349I only just recently learned that the military uses that term. We also use it for our fuel nozzles in motorsports and I wonder if the military got it from us, since our drybreak nozzles fit the description a lot more.
>>2953703How are things going in your niche? My dad's in IATSE 800 and it's the fucking apocalypse, something like 75% unemployment and they've frozen all training and new member inductions etc. because of it. Heard the same shit's going on across production but I guess IATSE covers live event stuff all over the country and they wouldn't be experiencing the same.
>>2952962You can't say "nigger rigged" any more. You have to say " African American engineering"
>>2957784hahahai'm running on outdated dictionary, i call mickey mouse work.
>>2957470I worked in kitchens many years ago. One of them was at a Whole Foods. We had this dyke head chef, she was gay-married and everything. One of her duties was to find a way to repurpose almost-expired food that we made for the deli section by serving it on the hot bar. Well, there was a shit ton of macaroni salad about to expire, so her genius idea was to throw some shredded cheese on top, slam it in the oven, and hope that some dumbass customers would see the new ‘recipe’ and want to try it. Well, what happens when you heat up mayonnaise is, the oil separates and rises to the surface. I started calling her new dish “hot mayonnaise” and it caught on; everyone was calling it that. Drove her absolutely mad.
>>2957580Reminds me of banana cutters, or what we sometimes call “the circumciser”
>>2957580>>2957815Fuck me it took me way too fucking long to find this clip just to make a garbage joke, but here it is:>Would you please hand me the mohel? https://youtu.be/TDvcGvbVPQg?si=3n0e080JbYSAEXlx&t=1573And fuck me, this would have been so much easier to find but the only thing I could find by searching for the exact fucking line was a stupid fucking SHORT that DOESN'T WORK WITHOUT THE PRECEDING SCENE, and in the compilation THEY CUT IT OUT?!https://www.youtube.com/shorts/3IWaqR0hSvsFUCK
>>2957833I just started watching the Drew Carey show again on Tubi, too. What a coincidence. And yes, YouTube shorts are dogshit and they should stop trying to ape other social media and stick to what they do best.
Rectum Seal
>heheheheh.. heheheheh…. Hey Butthead…. That light looks like a titty… heheheh….>Yeah Beavi, you dumbass, that’s why they call them Boob Lights… eh-huhuhuh….thpda
>>2952962>Gardner Bendercouldn't be me, i only use Garage Bumder lube
>>2958116Reminds me of stress relieving devices mounted in citroens with hydraulic suspension.
Please rate my nipple rack.
>>2958385"male nipple", how could I forget?
>>2958385I see those are barn sales and shit like that. Every time I ask no one can tell me what they use them for. Irrigation systems?
>>2958602Gas pipe.You drop them off to the depo and get your rack stuffed by some chick
There's an old school marine bedding compound called Dolfinite that is referred to in that field as "monkey shit" because of its sickly color and the fact that it's soft and gooey/sticky and gets everywhere.
>>2958602The plastic ones are used on sprinklers all the time between a T on the sprinkler line and the sprinkler head. And they’re used anywhere you need a male-male connection. Valves and fittings and meters are mostly female, so if you’re piping something where you have access with a shutoff valve and a meter right next to eachother, use a nipple of the appropriate size.
