How much of a deal breaker is it for a woman to discover that I wear flatulance pads?I hold in my farts all day but at night I have no control. When I wake up in the morning, my whole bedroom smells like horrible man ass.Women rarely come back for a second night of the gas chamber which is my bedroom.Are they going to freak out if they see my black charcoal panty liners?This is beyond embarrassing guys so please dont rip on me
>>18587509Not as much as reading this post would be holy shit man
OP is gassy
>>18587509Bait thread for muh banters
Do they actually work, OP?Man ass doesn’t smell like farts btw.
Maybe it's diet related?
>>18587748If you can keep the pad tight against your anus it does work. Problem is you have to have tight undies which I dont care for and it looks a mess.There is also a brand of underwear called toodles that has the charcoal built in. The problem with those is that they are expensive and cant be washed with detergent.
>>18587509Is that an actual thing that exists?
>>18587810Second that question.I don't want to google search that shit.
>>18587509Go carnivore and take magnesium pills. Stop fermenting all that agrarian slop in your asshole.
>>1858750999% unless you are both over the age of 60.
>>18587855Ever had protein farts?
>>18587509Get probiotics
>>18587810>>18587813
>>18587509You gotta sort something out diet-wise. The solution isn't to introduce a permanent corrective tool, it's to get yourself to a healthy baseline, that goes for any health thing. Change your diet up, eat more simple foods and have some fiber (from your food), take a multi-vitamin, probiotic foods would also help.>Women rarely come back for a second night of the gas chamber which is my bedroom.Funny story, a long term gf of mine, first time I ever slept at her place with her I blew her toilet up, clogged it, had to ask for the plunger, and she commented the next day about how I ripped ass in my sleep. She loved me for the next 2 years even though that happened.Men smell worse, they understand this. I don't think that's gonna be the ultimate deal-breaker for a woman but you can try air fresheners, candles, clean the place, and shower before bed too. If it smells like man ass, you might have some rank ass laundry sitting around or you are not showering before bed, that's also a possibility. Wash yo ass when you shower too.At the end of the day just eat right and stay clean and you shouldn't have these issues, get rid of those pads they're gay. You're fine and probably overthinking shit, it's very simple.
>>18587509I'd never even heard of these before today kek
>>18587509this shit is so faggy wtf
>>18588096>Men smell worse, they understand thisI'm a man and I don't understand this, the opposite has been my experience.
>>18588156That's anecdotal, women are more neutral in odor. We have larger sweat glands, and androgens and steroid compounds that women do not have, it's a fact that if unshowered for the same amount of time we smell significantly worse, but there are stank bitches that don't shower daily and I'd recommend you stop fucking only them.
>>18588096Smelling like musk is very different than smelling like farts. Man musk is whatever for women as long as it isnt the onions smell from your armpits. Farts is a big no.
>>18587509Have you tried eating more fiber and actually taking regular shits?
>>18587509>>18588092>>18588096>>18588170>the absolute state of americans
Imagine being a hetero.>>18587509Sort your diet out, eat more fiber, take whatever meds and supplements you need, wash your ass in the shower above all else, wash your clothes/sheets more regularly, and get air fresheners
>>18588690>Imagine being a hetero.I'm sure having a blown out anus like you fags have would help his problems
i use a couple of dabs of an essential oil on the butt seam part of my trousers
get drunk and shit your bed, with her in it.
>>18588711A partner who is used to associate farts and shit splatter with sexy times helps.
>>18588018I only fart in nature. I'm highly continent. I barely know what my farts sell like unless I eat corporation seed-based food, or agrarian eurasian soups. Those I let out and they are dangerous.
>>18588847
>>18587509Why are you worried about what a woman thinks when you're obviously super duper gay?
i have this same problem OP and i’ve found it’s fine as long as the woman is missing 1-3 teeth. that’s the sweet spot. i wish more of my friends would use stuff like this my whole friend group for real almost get kicked out of cons every time
>>18589382>>18589347pls stop ripping ;_; I have feelings and your hurting it
>>18588868>I barely know what my farts sell likeTry the trick of farting into your clasped hands. This will allow you to carry the fart to the kitchen where you can put it in a mason jar. List these on etsy and see how they do
braump
>>18588888
>>18587509kek
>>18587509If you actually wore flatulence pads, you would have spelled flatulence correctly.
>>18590169You must be a pretty fart smeller! I mean a smart feller
>Women rarely come back for a second night of the gas chamber which is my bedroom.I know I shouldn't laugh because it's clear a serious health condition but man
>>18587509I spend the entire night drooling and sweating and when I wake up, the room fucking reeks. I thought it was just sweat and my breath but I fart pretty much all the time, so yeah, reading this post I'm realizing I'm probably ripping ass in my sleep, too. Fuck!I've had two women over so far this year and they both acted like they loved me and like I gave them the best dick they've ever had and neither one wanted to see me again after that. I've got another one coming Saturday. Need fart panties ASAP. Where can I buy?
>>18590542get some toodles on amazon good luck anon!
>>18587509>I hold in my farts all dayI hate to tell you this anon but your breath likely smells even worse than you can imagine. You know holding in farts causes it to be absorbed by the bloodstream and you end up exhaling that stinky shit. And no I did not make that up.
>>18590735I dont want all these farts :_;
>>18588868this poster is not capable of higher thought
>>18590803I dont know about that, he seems pretty high to me
>americans literally wear diapers to make their sharts not stink up the room while they sleep
maybe some sort of buttplug would be a better solution.
>>18587509Can' t you just have the windows cracked open?
>>18591545>12 seasonal scents
>>18590803Fuck you, dude.
>>18591545Thats just crazy enough to work
>>18588092this doesnt make sense. people *want* to smell women's farts.
have you seen a doctor?maybe this is a treatable condition
>>18588847Thank god liberalism is dying. Please return to the closet or the earth.
>>18587509fix your diet you fucking retard
>>18592513>liberalism is dying.>>18592513false
>>18592525Its not diet
>>18592117You should be arrested for fragrancy
>>18592229>treatable conditiondoctor im fart reel bad wat do
>>18587509Do these really work?
>>18594453how bad do your farts smell?
>>18594458Pretty bad sometimes.. it depends on how bad my diet is. Other times my farts are really not that offensive
>>18593164hihi hoho
>>18590461haha got eem!
>>18594487I find that healthier foods like beans and veg make me fart but meat and protiems never do
Is farting /fa/?
