Linton Travel Tavern edish
>said i musnt' catch feelings for this one friend who i like and gives me a massage every now and then (she has explicitly turned me down when I have asked for more)>dream about cuddling with her last nightffs lads i've fucked it
every post below me is made by a smelly boring bastard
ktim
some of you aren't up to date on your DEI training and it shows
Might kill myslef
wish i was dead
>>214403142*werehypothetical, subjunctive mood
>>214403103>£4.25 for a Sunday roastI want to retvvvvvvvvrn
>>214403142we were all dead, before
end me now
They're not gonna kill you, so like if you give 'em a quick sh-short, sharp, shock, they don't do it again. Dig it? I mean he got off lightly, cos I could've given him a thrashing, I only hit him once. It's only a difference between right and wrong innit. I mean good manners don't cost nothing do they, eh?
>>214403153Yeah but that was like half your wages
fucks sake spent three minutes confused about the 0 reply archived thread that was linked first thought I was banned or something that's me done, congratulations
pink Floyd day is it?
>Samuel Leeds was offered what he described as an “attractive” deal for the historic Willingham House in Willingham, Cambridgeshire, but refused to be part of the “arrogant” government’s asylum system. Mentioned this before about how it's almost entirely foreigners who are actually willing to give their hotels up to these contractsJust go through the company house listings and you can see
>>214403164
remembering games and daisy chains and laughs
>>214403153ever heard of inflation lad?
21st century schizoid man
have never worked outside of an officeeven imagining working someplace like maccies and having to deal with the general unwashed public gives me a panic attack
>>214403216Retard
bit from an old top gear episode i think about all the time. it was something along the lines of when we were in the eu europe made rules but nobody followed them, except for the british who followed every piece of legislation to the letter why are we specifically such rule abiding bootlicking cunts
having insanely high inflation with complete stagnation in wage growth is fucking shit. even 100k chads won't feel rich, probably just relatively comfortable with a few extra creature comforts
bit soft and weak if I'm honest
lyricposting should be banned you should have to vocaroo yourself singing instead
are these gay lads
>>214403229Still happens to this dayUK will not go against a judges ECHR ruling France just chooses to ignore themAzerbaijan is in the ECHR for fucks sake it's a jokeStarmer is a lawyer and essentially sees the law as sacrosanct and judges as their interpreters so he will not go against them
>>214403256no mate, it's a pair of boots
>>214403241you can stand under my umbrellaella ella ayy ayy ayy ayy ayy ayy
>>214403256don't buy boots with zips on the side
scotland has more people than the republic of ireland, but less than the island as a whole
you all are british
>>214403217https://youtube.com/watch?v=PyJUUTaXz3M
Without immigrants the NHS wouldnt survive!I never get this. Surely if an institution requires a huge foreign workforce then it has some major structural failings? Do these people not see that millions more people add huge strain onto the NHS that they love so much
>>214403256No lad perfect autumn shoeDon't let the people here walking around in their tattered Nike's tell you otherwise
>>214403192LOL imagine believing this fat grifter Has he shown any proof of this offer? No.He doesn’t give a fuck about British people just another slimy piece of shit looking for online popularity so he can boost his course sales
>>214403256clothes don't make a manyou are gay
>>214403256those zips are traditionally a bit feminine but theyre mens bootswould you ever wear brown boots though
>>214403269why not?
>>214403294That's based thoughbeit
>>214403288perfect would be Chelsea boots
slut
>>214403256Metrosexual
>>214403312Ok child
>>214403303will let water in, end up breaking and they look weird on those boots imo get a darker pair if you insist on the zips
im 5 years younger than nick fuentes
>>214403294I mean theyre both bad.
/brit/, darling, you're boring me to tears
mad how we will literally never grow out of the mentality that if "teacher" is off you can just do whatever you want>wfh>everyone except me and another guy on holiday>dial into only meeting of the day, nobody there>decide to watch youtube and have a wankbasically got the day off
What you looking at cunt, stop looking at this post before I crack you one you dog
>>214403359and 5 stone fatter
>>214403374I work in academia and every day is like this
>>214403376I don’t use stone if you said kg I could respond
kek
2 in the morningwhat is some good music for 2 in the morning?
Just found out about Sophie Rain.
>>214403331Alri Danny Butcher's brother
>>214403116It's worse when it's your gf's sister. She's fit as fuck, we get on like a house on fire and always have a dance together when we're out boozing. She's asked if she can move in to ours for a bit when she's finished in her uni city as wellProblem is it would blow up the entire family
>>214403422Doesn’t get naked
/tg/ working on a late signing for Mousey I'd hate to lose him but he's pushing for the move
>>214403459and she's a christian virgin
Kind of mad to think people from around the world log onto the x app and they see the site's owner talking about Britain being a rape capital.I will be there September 13th.
>>214403337this, those zips are 100% a mistake
>>214403487>>214403459swear ive seen her norks
>>214403459Just found out she doesn't get naked. Back to the gay porn i guess
Went to the beach to enjoy the sound of the waves and to watch the birds and there were some zoomers playing loud American rap while they took turns playing with a yo-yo. Really pissed me off
>>214403421trip hopPortishead, 6 Underground, that sort of thing
>>21440339832kg fatty
>>214403459she does I've seen her fannard and tits this very morning while browsing for some wnka material
>>214403297>would you ever wear brown boots thoughdon't see why not
pee smells
vic reeves is so painfully unfunny dunno why he's a british tv mainstay like a cancerous tumour just latched to the side
>>214403508great idea, I haven't listened to Dummy in yearsthank you
>Hey yew kuds, stup pleyung wuth thut yewyew
>>214403554
>>214403543is it a dolphin in a bathtub
>>214403536leave it on reddit next time>>214403543has it taken British tv 20 years to get to australia or something
>>214403554I don’t talk like that
>>214403568:(
>>214403392i did my internship as a research assistant at another uni and it was pretty common for me to just turn up to a locked empty office, maybe i'd get an email from the professor that basically said "lol soz decided to stay home today don't bother going in"i think we had 2 weeks out of my entire time there where we had to prepare a paper and worked full days in that period, but mostly we were just pissing about with circuit boards and writing code to explore some random idea someone had for maybe 3 hours a day. i thought they were going to fire me because i did nothing but they ended up offering me a fully paid masters with the goal to fund a phd with a stipend
Already depressed thinking how Summer is over and we're in for about 8 months of early nights and shitty cold wet weather
>>214403595Not me. Got my autumn wardrobe and selection of autumn/winter fragrances ready to go.
fucking love smoking weed and jacking off and shit
>week off work>booking a holiday>mrs back at school this week>gonna order a takeway laterYeah, I'm comfy
>>214403610this picture would have blown up the internet in 2002
got the poo on
>>214403543can't stand that twat
abstaining from porn for a few days because I'm seeing a potential gf prospect on Wednesday and I need to make sure my dick works
>>214403610love going in and patting cats bellies when they stretch out like this because they always give you the most indignant fed up look like you just spat in their soup
>>214403578get a lot of your panel shows and that and he inevitably pops up and not once has he ever got a proper laugh from either audience or the other people on, always at most a pity giggle
Feeling…. Curious..
>>214403626'
>>214403626>mrs back at school this weekum...
>>214403536imagine pissing yourself all the time and you think nobody noticed but then it turns out everyone is talking about you and some weirdo has roped in multiple people in the company to deal with you. literally all she needs to do is quietly tell piss girl she smells, ask if she's good, and then tell her to stop smelling off piss
>>214403578Not sureThat Sean Locke's a right laugh though, I'll come see him if he's ever on tour here
rorke insisting to border force it's just an 'OCD habit' to factory reset his phone after solo holidays in southeast asia
>>214403701better bring a shovel, mate
In me room playing the guitar and rocking out way past my bed time. The perks of being single
>>214403631
cat cat cat hungry x
>>214403714gis a lick
>>214403711wouldn't it be worse to still have all the... media
wonder how many more boomer script writers have to die before tv shows stop calling views on videos "hits"
>>214403713sean would've loved that joke
i've got mental health
>>214403720rofl
>>214403753cheer up mate :)
>>214403626>>214403711ummy cummy
>>214403753my health? mental
>>214403753woke noncense
>>214403727Rightohttps://voca.ro/13RUMHVSKZRC
>at old job>this lad keeps very obviously wanking in the toilets at least once a day>can't prove it and don't want to embarrass him, he isn't hurting anyone so it just becomes this funny thing>this weird, likely autistic guy who looks 18 but is actually 40 joins the company>he overhears us giggling about wanklad>is obviously incredibly bothered>decides to loudly confront wanklad in front of the entire officewhat's your thoughts lads? obviously wanklad is a weirdo but fucking hell hated that fucking freak who call him out, absolute psycho woman-like behaviour
noncense is what they burn in catholic churches
>>214403797wahey look at him go
>>214403689giving up sounds womfy, unfortunately giving up now would introduce more problems than it would solve
>>214403801nigga stood on bidness
>>214403801I wank in the bogs regularlyIs there a no-wanking rule? I don't believe so
>trying to move to new area to begin a new job which I've been offered>graduated just this summer so very little employment history>lived in student halls so never dealt with landlords>all my prospective landlords are demanding payslips, references, and contracts just so I can move into some £800pm gaff which I'll have to share with 4 other peoplethis country is a FUCKING JOKE
>>214403801Sperg was in the right You can't be wanking in the office Honestly shame on you for putting up with it
>>214403801how do u know he was wanking
>>214403801how do you know he was wanking and not doing a poo? I did a poo most days when I toiled in the office did everyone think I was wanking? am I wanklad?
oil rig toilet
>>214403859just stank of cum
>>214403830why can't you wait until you get home?
>>214403844nah, you're just still a child, and being a child is shit
>>214403801nothing wrong with wanking at work you neek
Wank on and do your bit
>>214403801Wish I had a toilet wanklad at toil. Office is so boring that I still hear people gossiping about how I tried to chat up the ugly bird like two years ago
>>214403801kek I was wank lad when I worked in the office. Fortunately worked in a massive building and knew the secret toilets I could go and wank in without being disturbed at all.
>>214403872Don't want to? I'm addicted to wanking and porn
>>214403893Be the change you want to see lad
>>214403844This is the same in every country in the worldJust get your parents to be your guarantor
>>214403859came back a bit red in the face and sometimes sweaty>>214403861probably one of those things where someone joked that poolad is actually wanking, but then all the lads think about it properly and decide he's actually wanking so he becomes wanklad>>214403856surely doing a poo in the office is more gross than wanking in the office, wanklad wasn't hurting anyone
boss makes a dollar while I make a dimethat's why I manhandle my ham candle on company time
>>214403942kek
>>214403940>surely doing a poo in the office is more gross than wanking in the officeWhat the fuck are you talking about Let me guess, "wanklad" is actually you
surely you lads dont really wank at work
>>214403940>came back a bit red in the face and sometimes sweatythankfully I'm not a struggle wanker
>>214403801I used to work in the big building in the middle of canary wharf and was the resident wanklad there. I think that makes me the king of wanklads, literally wanking up in the sky above all the povvos.
>>214403967What are you scared of lad?
>>214403967people are in boring office jobs for yearsif it has big comfy disableds and you don't spaff up the walls then it's a victimless crime
whats that one cool song from The Matrix
>>214403942
>>214403967Had a wank at work once and the only source of porn I had was a recording off my ring doorbell of a lady copper
>>214403967I doWell I at least wank 3 times during the work day when I WFH so I'm not going to go cold turkiye in the office
>>214403967haha yeah no way haha not at all haha whaaaat
matey can't imagine bashing one out at work because he has to lie down on the floor fully naked with a scented candle on
>>214403967was tempted to bash one out in the bogs over the bird i fancied there but i never did
https://vocaroo.com/1mYxIM7AILm3omdsss rorke
>>214403994calm like a bomb
>>214403967used to wank when I was in doing some overtime at the weekend and there was hardly anyone in. toilberg paying me double time to spunk all over the disabled toilets
>>214404009Spat my coffee out
>>214404009screaming
>people at work will think I'm wanking in the toilets instead of just sat on the bog doomscrolling to pass the timeNot sure what's worse
absolute helmethttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hG6U9WAdppo
>>214404021https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFS4zYWxzNAfound it
>>214404009pscrmn
>>214403994Wake Up
>>214403967mate i used to wank in school assemblies
>>214404020Not sure I understand this gimmick.
>>214403998Don't you have work wifi?
Had a wank at the movie theatre once
I used to wank in the bogs at school so not sure why I'd not continue the trend at work
i once had a wank in drama class when we were all sat in a big circle. not a chance i got away with that but nobody ever said anything
>>214404090Didn't wanna chance it coming back to me would rather be wanklad than femdomlad
>>214403219
Hello this is Dr Grande
>>214404118>>214404082How do you even do this without every single person noticing
whiffs of vinegar coming from my gooch area x
used to wank in english and my teacher would ask me if i was ok because i was shaking a bit in front of the class and once took me out to ask if i was alright and i had to lie about being shocked because i'd bruised my leg earlier that daygranted didnt really know what i was doing back then just knew it felt good
me and my school mates went on our first holiday without parents together and on the plane we took turns soloing the mile high club. the only rule was that you had to spaff in a tissue and bring it back to the lads to show them
>>214404118Used to wank handsfree during milfy english lessons
>>214404134can only assume that in order to get away with wanking in a room full of people your willy has to be fucking tiny
>>214404050What's so hard about frying an egg for him
I refused to even use the toilet in school unless it was a piss. Had TWO shits my entire 6 or whatever it was years there. Genuine fucking animals, the lot of you. Genuinely disgusted by this ngl. Just fucking wait until you get home. Fuck's sake.
Why is the richest man in the world retweeting this meth addicted runt?
why are you all addicted to wanking and porn
>>214404146Refuse to believe this
have a slight hunch that some of you may be making up these stories
>>214404181Why don't you ask him directly instead of being a coward?
Wanked on a bus once. Was pretty much empty so nobody saw but definitely felt a bit bad about it
>>214404134i just nonced myself through my trouser pocket
I'd tell my wanking story but I do not wish to incriminate myself
>>214403903Secret toilets...
never had a wank, don't know how
>>214404181Steve Laws looks genuinely dysgenicSid from ice age looking ahh
>>214404146teacher 100% clocked on to what you were doing and were trying to tell you to quit being a disgusting freak without embarrassing you
Mad that I ate a big dinner and feel hungry again. Might have the tape worms again
you know how northerners don't know how to hold a pen because no one bothers to teach them properlydo you reckon they also don't know how to wank properly?
>>214404177ktimmers
>>214404250who taught you that, then?
>>214404250Good thing your uncle taught you when you were 10 right?
remember talking about wanking with 2 of my mates and through the convo we discovered that one of them didn't really know what wanking was.He said stuff like "idk how you use your hands though" and "I hate having to hide the undewear from my mum". Turns out he was just watching porn and not touching his knob, just waiting to cum hands free in his boxers, then hiding his boxers in his wardrobe in a big cummy pile. He must have been 15 at this point.
used to wank in lessons quite regularly. started just through my trouser pocket but I got bolder and would get my willard out to have a proper go. we only had normal desks with no sides so it was very risky and quite the rush. this was all before I produced any cum though so there was never any evidence. the perfect crime
>>214404181England will be freed
mad how easily /brit/ just devolves into talking about wanking in weird fucking places. anyone remember the field wank thread? need someone to post the collage image of that thread
do they have those rubber grip things that you used to have to put on your pen to correct your grip but for wanking
>>214404279No way
>>214404243why are you eating dinner at 10.40am
>>214404287had a few of those as a teenager kek good times
I’m feeling blackpilled and furious
>>214404287Fucking hell yeah get it posted I forgot someone made a collage, pretty sure I'm in it.
>>214404287howling one lad mentions a freak at work who wanked in the toilets and every /brit/nonce starts chiming in with their own stories
>>214404250this fat retard in my school revealed that he wanked with his finger and thumb, like he basically pinched his dick with the tip of his finger and tip of his thumb and just rubbed the big jizz vein
>>214404282holy heart attack, fatman!
Sometimes go on nature walks down the river and find a nice secluded clearing in the trees by the river and wank there and cum on a leaf. this is my weirdest one
>>214404287tommy walsh wank in the garden gimmick
wanked behind a chest of drawers in room 43 of the first year halls at magdalen college, oxford
>>214404313incel discovers conversation, 2025 (colourised)
Having a wank is ingrained in British culturehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DkuXBsHytE&t
any weird fetishes then while were on the subject?I like girls farting and burping and weight gain, but only skinny to chubby, can't do fat or bbw
once i was sitting in some bushland in the dead of night with my pants down being bitten on my bare legs by insects but bashing one out anyway
>>214404320are you not worried that a female fox or something might run past and some gets in her fannard and there are little freak /brit/runt x fox crossbreeds running about?
>>214404306We have different time zones mate. It’s spring here as well due to how the earth works n that
>>214404359Just facesitting and meaty pussy lips for me
>>214404359weight gain anywhere from bbw to immobile
>>214404372my origin story iwabhwerntbf
This is what you crave
>>214404359Can't say :)
>>214404372would be a laugh
Used to get worms in my bowls from cats and eating out of bins as a young lad, used to stand up after taking a poo and watch all the little white worms wriggle around and my ass was so itchy all night
>>214404359quite like chastity porn where they use the flat cages and then screw on a fake cock and then wank off the fake cock
>>214404398:|
Lads you ever lay in bed at night and just have a proper meltdown thinking of how shit your life is?Had one last night at 2AM. Just felt so sick of it all, sick of toil, life going nowhere, was having a right melty
13 tights
>>214404389LOL dis wat timmy be braggin about wen he say his wife cooks
lost the joie de vivre lads
>>214404418cor
once ate something grotty out of the bin at chessington cant remember what though
can feel a cold coming on
>>214404389grim and not even slightly peng
>>214404412tell it to your friends not us
Mental how fit they are
>>214404412nah, not that much of a self-obsessed sadact, me
>>214404440It’s just rage bait cooking, it’s a common tiktok genre. They throw the food out afterwards
need someone to post the field wanker thread ASAP. legendary thread from like 3-4 years ago, searched computerberg but can't find it
>>214404389i don't like beans
trump.....ded
>>214404389this tastes either horrible or rather nice, no inbetween
she gon SNATCH that presidency
>>214404470me when I'm a caveman whose just woken up from surgery to tie a knot in my bowels
I don’t trust like that. Undo that button
>>214404458well i fell for it. good thing i don't have tiktok i'd be fucking fuming at the screen constantly
>>214404461Found it
>>214404486nan bumming freak
Another 8 hours of toil ffs
once decided to have a wank in my gran's downstairs toilet. My grandad had died in the house a few months earlier, and at some point during the wank I heard this loud thump behind me and I thought it was a sign of his restless spirit disapproving of my actions so I stopped and never wanked there again
>>214404512why did people get naked in the fields? I just to go into my garden naked to wank when nobody was home but being out and about and getting naked feels odd
>>214404512legendforgot about the lad who wanked in a field when it was foggy, imagine coming across that
>>214404532It was your granny taking a bbc
>>214404389>frozen beans??????
Lay on my lawn and wanked at a plane flying above me, don’t reckon they saw me due to altitude
>>214404560Silent hill wank
3 pm about to get touched during break time
>>214404512glad to see work experience get a mentionI was in my local corner shop and did fuck all, so I started taking copies of the Daily Star into the stock room and flogging myself sillygot a tenner at the end of it for my troubles
Sex with Emma.
my bollocks are so full theyre making sloshing sounds like big buckets of milk when i walk
>>214404560imagine him cumming across you
>>214404575scromitaging
>>214404554it's counter intuitive that field wanking is safer than garden wanking, but you know it's also truewanking in your garden is far riskier since neighbours could look out their window and see you
Very much looking forward to my daily 3pm walks again starting today
>>214404627>his garden is overlooked
When I first started wanking I didn't understand how to get to the ejaculation part so I used to piss after a few minutes thinking it would expel cum instead
danger wankget erectioncall mumbergsee if you can cum and be decent by the time she gets to your room
>>214404512>05/10/22Fucking hell I remember this thread like it was yesterday, can't believe it's been 3 years. There was a much bigger screencap with more posts since you freaks couldn't stop sharing stories of wanking outside
>>214404644
I used to go into the computer room in the middle of the day, undress the anime girls in a dress-up Flash game on Newgrounds and print off a screenshot, then I'd hide them in the compartment at the end of my bed for nightly ministrationsI got to like 15 and decided it was too risky so over the course of an afternoon I wodded up all the print-outs and flushed them
>>214404575screaming
ah yes monday mornjng /!}*#asmiles
>>214404666youre calling us freaks when men anonymously discussing wanking is a core memory of yours
>>214404412OOOOOH CHILLLLDD THINGS ARE GONNA GET EASIERROOOOHHHH CHILD THINGS WILL GET BRIGHTERR
sharting yourself is a daily experience for americans
>>214404677some of my first wanks were to online hentai sex gamessome of them were well good
>>214404677*wadded
>>214404693I deny this accusation
>>214404704yeah alright
>>214404689Yeah and what? It's funny fuck off
>>214404705October is cold
i remember getting caught in 4k wanking by mumberg. she screamed at me that wanking was evil and made me promise to never do it again.
I grew up in a very cramped house, and often had to wank outside out of frustration at not being able to have privacy. When I was 16 I went to an abandoned old house in my neighborhood to have a wank. Very old farm house from the 1800s that still had furniture and dishes in it, like the owner had left everything behind. So I had a wank in his kitchen at his kitchen table on one of the chairs. The chair was positioned facing the back porch and the door was wide open but I figured no one would see me. Finished up and pulled my pants up and left, and then a saw this guy who'd been watching me the whole time I assume from the look on his face. He wouldn't take his eyes off me. Older guy about 40 with a mustache. He was standing in direct sight of the porch and door into the kitchen. I had to walk past this guy to get away from the house. That was the last time I ever used that house for a wank and they tore it down later that year.
>>214404689>men anonymously discussing wankingthis conjured up an image of those doggers that wear animal masks for it, except instead of rogering someone's wife in the back of a Ford Focus, you're standing around in a services car park deliberating adolescent wanking habitsthat's the post-internet future for us lot
>Very old farm house>from the 1800somds cody go to your spastic yank threda
i feel like a mild day for october is about 10-15C which is pretty cold if you ask me
>>214404770>post-internet futureI wish
just seen 2 blokes holding hands. bit gay isn't it
>>214404770>/brit/ is basically dogginginteresting perspective
I think my coworker is gay but I don't know for sure, what can I do to find out?
got caught wanking at school once by a girl in my formshe didn't tell anybody and we still got on well during English where I was seated next to her so I reckon she instantly repressed it
>>214404780That's old for my country. Sorry I didn't wank in ye olde thatched roof dwelling from 1200s, Wankingshire
got the 'p on
October so often has an "Indian Summer" nowadays that I genuinely just prepare for itgets me through a dreary actual summer going "yeah but we'll get another good week in October"
>>214404814Ask where the weirdest place he wanked is
>>214404814suck him off
>>214404820hahah, you're alright lad, go on stay a while, you're one of the good yanks
the gf has got her haircut done into a bob haircut and now looks very similar to my mum. her perfume is also the same stuff my aunt wears. yet weirdly enough it just makes me want to shag her even more - especially when she's wearing a white dress shirt. lot of very Freudian things happening in my head right now, methinks
>>214404839I've been here 3 years
dis nigga wans to fuk his momma lmaaaaaaaaoooo
when 4chan gets nuked for not paying online safety fines, I'll start leaving reviews on services car parks about crisps and that, then you lot can track me down and we'll have a laugh about slags and wanking and poo outside the Costa
>>214404677I would wait for a weekend when the whole family left for an activity that I was able to turn down (shopping trip for example) then google boobs and girls kissing etc (I don't think I'd even learned the word "porn" at this point) and print them off. I had a whole collection hidden inside a large book at the bottom of a pile. When I got bored of them I would go for a walk and dump them in a random public bin
New soon, lots more walking talk
>>214404862didn't ask for your life story did i?
got the incest porn on
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNIoiz_GlJ4
Get it made
Where's the new?
>>214404900
>>214404933Isnt onethis is it
>>214404675 NEW
ten hag sacked
>>214404958>ten:)
post the fucking new
>>214404958wtf
>>214404990NEW
>>214404965
>>214404958me when I'm in HR and I get rid of all the women over 50
>>214403565 Eric Pickles looking Bradley
>>214404755It used to be colder
