stoned ape theory
poo smells lmao
oh, it says that level 80 is coming to Pokemon Go in ~ 33 days now. I thought it was 28 days sometime last week yeah it might be possible now that literally time has spawned in more hours
thunderberg and lightningstein going mental
>>214751258
would definitely rather fucking suck in a blood clot from eating sweets of out fannies than a wart. EURGH
hey toby, follow me, i got all your zubats and pokemons up here*hops over the wilderness ditch*
stoned ape theory is american nonsense, so retarded.
>>214751299>>214751309yay!
>>214751309lovely day here in Westminster
actually thats almost 3 million XP per day and that is probably impossible
>this post belongs on /pol/, no?
Mad how /int/ is just a bunch of brown incels lusting after white women. And here we are. A small pocket of civilisation.
>lovely day here in Westminster
>>214751358wonder what he's up to now. wonder what's on his harddrive
>>214751358>>214729392
>>214751364see so many lads like that here, but I'm just a runt
My eczema isn’t going away. Beginning my job in two weeks and got huge blisters on my hands.
Peng
>>214751376seek therapy
if y'all could contribute to my thread, that'd be great>>>/pol/515493735>>>/pol/515493735>>>/pol/515493735
ALDI job and a willy,ALDI job and a willy.Itty bitty titties and a cock,Itty bitty titties and a cock.6'3" and an adam's apple,6'3" and an adam's apple.
Having a little lie down
>>214751393Get the hydrocortisone on it
>>214751395corr will give this a go
>>214751390leftypol thinks he is on the 'right side of history' and that traditional morality or standards of civility no longer applies to him
30 minute break from toil
>>214751424>>214751390fuck off too pol with your boring drivel
>>214751431Loving your work.
>>214751452>Janitor applications are now being accepted. Click here to apply.
Might get a job… pfffttttt BAHAH No no that is just not for me I'd rather live in a cave
there is a containment board for a reason
>>214751390She probably joined the crowd and comforted her rorke boyfriend as he sobbed into his us flag hanky50 years from now she'll tell a grandchild that she was her generation's D.B. Cooper and they won't believe her
>shave>wait an hour for face to stop bleeding
go to bed mate
Might have made a mistake investing in klarna
>>214751459would not be as depressing if he wasnt hit by the early stages of norwood
snood
nightreign depths toil looms
>>214751498>she>grandchildUm
>>214751501why are you scared of being masculine?your face grows hair for a reason
in the club poppin them percshad hoes gushing like charlie kirk
>>214751544Yeah and that reason is to itch and be a filthy burden
>>214751544The greatest trick the devil ever played
might need to get my ingrown toenail removed
wow to get 1 billion XP like Brandon I would have to play for 7 years, and he has like 3 billion XP. maybe there is a way to get 3M XP per day
haytch e double hockey sticks
>>214751624take it to /mu/ big l
they had that boy leaking #CharlieSquirt
reminds me of Sergei Kirov
Anyone else have gay phases where all you just jack off to femboys and traps and shit for a couple of days and then lose interest and go back to jacking it to women?
what is this action supposed to communicate?
getting to the bit where the detroit public rebel against their corporate overlords
BrandonTan91 and I agree about a lot of things :) and his point about going around with a group of people grinding supports my argument, that to be the best you just have to be consistent over everyone else to be top 1%
just voted for more immies
mad how british people make a big deal of what soccer team they support while all the players aren't locals and half of them weren't born in England
>>214751651Indians have this mad confidence and are incapable of feeling cringe
>>214751651not sure
>>214751646I've had a gay phase in public school where I bummed a few cute lads and had my willy sucked several times but now I'm happily married to a woman.
>>214751661alri literal dimension-traveller
>>214751646yes although l am at least dominant in my gay fantasies
>>214751651it's their way of nodding
>>214751390glad youve already come up with a motive detective rorke, but why are you here on /brit/ instead of helping over in utah?
>>214751700
>>214751729fit
cunt
>>214751646no not gay myself but I do regularly fantasise about being the bottom in a free use d/s relationship where the top also pimps me out
>>214751729>half face hidden yet still very manly>big bum but hairyNot great is it
When I die, my tombstone will say "awkward freak. never married. achieved nothing. loved by no one."
>>214751779No one will read it
I'd have sex with hunter schafer if she were a girl
>>214751760Completely normal mate. Dont worry about it x
Charlie Kirk's wife scrubbing the gunpowder residue off of her hands before she goes to identify the body
Yes, a player's distance from the Earth's equator historically affected their interaction radius with PokéStops and Gyms in Pokémon GO, though this was a bug in the game's map projection that has since been fixed. Players further from the equator experienced a smaller perceived reach on the map due to the way the digital map was "stretched" to fit the spherical Earth, making the interaction radius appear smaller than it was. However, in 2021, Niantic officially stated that the 80-meter interaction radius for PokéStops and Gyms is now global and the same for all players.(the video is > 2021)
>>214751779will be knocked over and the entire graveyard paved over for flats
>>214751764how about this
>>214751779No one will pay for it so you'll have some kind of council one thats like "anon 1995- 2027"
>>214751788Hoping a passerby might leave me a flower or something out of pity x
>>214751651one time at a meeting a (Polish) fairly senior manager made some suggestion to an Indian junior dev who kind of shook his head. the manager frowned and went "why not?" and the lad panicked and started explaining Indian head gestures.
Mental how you can watch President Kennedy get his head blown off completely unrestricted on youtube
I like tits as well :)
>invades lindisfarne
>>214751819Yeah id do gay things to him (put my willy in his bum)
>>214751846Mandatory viewing during school history lessons
Rorkazoid RorkeyDied in the church and was buried along with his name
>>214751850Ive been to lindas farm
>Pokedaxi says you can get XP "if you hit excellent throws">hit 2 excellent throws in a row and catch them
starvetoil begins. the abs will be here in a couple weeks.1200 calories per day5000 steps per day60 minutes of other activity in the form of cardio or lifting per day
>>214751646Yeah just a bit of a novelty really innit
>>214751179looks underage, is this legal?
Haven't finished a video game in a while. I play it for 10 hours straight then drop it and never think about it again
>>214751646>>214751721I had several gay experiences when I was in boarding school. Nothing too big, just some boyish night poundings.
>>214751646l like to imagine a girl is blackmailing me/manipulating me into shagging a femboy or something
>>214751646No mate
Weathers getting chilly, keep warm with tex
>>214751651>>214751709>>214751720>>214751739>>214751845it's called the Dravidian head wobble and only South Indians do it
>>214751985I have this video saved >:)
Mad how all this stuff keeps escalating but AGI will happen before it goes anywhere
>>214751981You should give your own head a wobble you silly paki bastard
>>214752006a gay inferno?
>>214752008have this video stored in my brain
>>214751930current weight? current bodyfat estimate? do your starvation for 1600cal over a longer period
I really need to eat something and take a bath
Any resident evil mandem in?
>>214752026ayy
>>214752008at least hes active
>>214751980Gantz
>>214751985Woah woah woah
>>214752066watching a review of Resident Evil Revelations 2 right now
I miss her so much lads
Nothing intrinsically unhealthy or wrong about a hamburger
have regained my zest for life at the youthful age of 32
It's going to be a tranny isn't it
>>21475204781kg and 13-14%, I reckon I could do a lot in a week or two by massively increasing activity and reducing calories, aiming for a 1700-2000cal deficit
>>214752123Kek
Ack
>>214752123We've had at least two resident french attention whoresGive it enough time I'm sure another one will come long
>>214752123Genuinely regret that I was living with my parents at the time and had no plausible excuse to go to France and shag her
>>214751930>1200 calories per daySeems too little. How long for?
>>214752090>Just seen an England fan shit in his own hand and hurl it at riot police.fucking poo screaming
>>214752184Here lies scout. He ran fast and died a virgin.
could do with some extra money so I'll apply for the janitorial position here :)
>>214752168Where is it?
>>214752008bro is majestic
murder is badit makes me sad
>>214752200A week or two maximum
actually hilarious how Charlie Kirk died"prove me wrong" HAHAHA
>>214752193She was a mong. Someone described her as a retarded little sister and its fitting (in before thats hot)
>be in academia>make a good friend there>drink together and commiserate at how awful academia is and how poor we are>three years ago he quit and founded a startup>makes a shitton of money but we barely talk anymoreI've lost a friend.why didn't he offer me a job anyway.
Roooooorke
Thanks for standing still wanker
>>214752209mental how strong bones are the jaw is one of the most blood vessel-dense part of the body
>>214752251blglo on
>>214752255state of yank security
Just seen an England fan tell a woman in a burqa to speak English but in fact she was speaking Welsh
>>214752249I dont get it
>>214752264must say I've never moved and wanted at the same time
>>214752278Yeah?
>>214752287I'm a britisher and I'm shocked, mouth agape, with egg on my face. some of my views have changed as a consequence of this.
>>214752302yeah im pretty sure. at first I thought "nerves" but I am going with blood
replaying the vid of the blood gushing from his neck in my head and smiling to myself
>>214752340this isn't on lad, have a word with yourself
>>214752323lot of important milestones >>214752352crazy how most female therapists - 99% of them without the blue-haired ones - could do this easy and they just choose to not to
reckon most, like at least 80%, of mental illness is self inflictedespecially schizos, really do not at all feel bad for them in any capacity, try not doing the hell lettuce fella
>>214752352umm yes please!
I hate having a lazy eye so much?
>>214752340just did this as well
lost 70 quid some how
mystic7 probably shitting himself right now. crazy to think about a life where your job might change because a different company bought a Nintendo game
The absolute open contempt that middle-class lefties have for England fans is one of the most telling things about them desuIt's literally a bunch of working-class white men cheering on a team that's half-black and openly represents left-wing values and that still isn't considered good enough
>>214752398Endearing
>>214752366what is this fella doing nowadays
>>214752249Actual last words:>ATTENDEE: Do you know how many mass shooters there have been in America over the last 10 years?>KIRK: Counting or not counting gang violence? *gets shot*If you were a screenwriter you'd be told to change it for being too on the nose.
chocolaate bourbon biscuiotsthey are yumy in my tumy
>>214752417Yeah mate classism is English culture, deal with it
>>214752398question mark doesnt go on there
Hmmmm
>>214752435Why? I dont get it?
>>214752434Begging for money
I'm a terminally online weirdo like all of us but I never got the watching people die thing, just ghoulish really
>>214752352cronem kryptonite
>>214752302neoliberal teeth
current most plausible theory i've seen, and it really does match up 100% without a single hole: trump wanted south park to stop making fun of him so he personally shot kirky so they pulled the episode
charlie>KIRKcharlie>VEITCHcharlie>CHAPLINcharlie>AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY
you're going to win so much you get tired of winning
>>214752435Who shot him?
>>214752435Millenial writing in real life
black man walking around outside can see my neighbour watching him as well just in case
fizzy raspberry blackberry lemon limeade
well everyone gets shot eventually
>>214752505prefer not to say
>>214752498what about Sheen
>>214752435I know, I'm saying he had placards everywhere saying "prove me wrong"that, along with those last words, just makes it perfect. couldn't write it.>>214752476nothing new then. thought he'd be dead by now with his weight desu
C H A R L I EHARIZARD
lembit opik sex arse stuck in montenegro FFS
>>214752512kek
part and parcel of being on yank schoolgrounds really
based
>>214752568Tonights wank sorted x
>>214752568pussey
just agreed with the gardener that the muslims are defo gonna lose the civil war vs us and the blacks
Might get a cossplayer gf
>>214752593>us and the blacksand the indians
today i WILL: clean flatapply for AT LEAST two jobsdo an exercise of some sort
>>214752593>Siding with the blacksNGMI
Pooing out of my arsehole
>>214752593Careful mate your gardener may actually be a secret agent
>>214752612wanking is an exercise
>>214752603Good lad
geeked up playin xbox all day
We had a perfectly nice society in the 90s and there was literally no reason anything had to change
>>214752639i refuse to do the ID thing so my wanking schedule has gone right down
goyslop day today. dunno what to get
>>214752661VPN mate
>>214752646FITTTTTT
>>214752655global factors
arab libelorbabel lairorbilly jarorrally jib
>>214752646fat hog
>>214752522Does shooting someone prove them wrong ?
>>214752691Government backdoor ini
/brit/bros shine some wisdom on meI have OCD, and the love of my life married someone elseHow the fuck do I stop having thoughts about her when my disease demands I keep ruminating about her?
>>214752655Jaime bulger
>>214752655Even in 80s and 90s movies you can see the liberal propaganda creeping in
>>214752655Too white Rorke
>>214752733for me it's constantly completing the compulsive rituals :)
>>214752435Wasn't a mass shooter so there's no irony
>>214752733My wisdom is that you need to go back to /bharat/ or whatever your general is called.
>>214752733thats not OCD
gravity doesn't grant me the privilege of failure my bough never breaks i don't stumble into anything so i climb and i carve my initials in the bark with that feather i found and it's all so contrived and my genes didn't bless me with the foresight of a sage but i know how this will end with apologies and ink on the page
got pubes all over my desk ahah what am I like x
>>214752736rorke
>>214752655Yeah alri Irvine Welsh
>>214752778*licks your desk while maintaining eye contact with you the whole time*
>>214752754>compulsive ritualslike? Give me examples.>>214752759it's dead and jeets aren't smart enough to help others>>214752773it's a form of OC spectrum D
*strides boldly into the thread and does a poo on the floor*
>>214752791Is that one of his arguments? Might give him a read
We are the ones who make a better day so let's start giving
Mad that yanks call shield bugs "stink bugs" Not right is it
feeling mentally delicate today
>>214752862grow up
>>214752829He literally writes about how grim and decadent everything is. Read some short stories by him one the son gets turned into a fly and gets horny from his parents doing shit play
>>214752798knocking wood a specific amount of timesapplying isopropyl alcohol to my bodyother things involving hobbies
>>214752878Might not give him a read
>>214752878cor what's the name of that short story?
>>214752862Ktim, currently in my blanket rubbing my feetsies together
>>214752892will try outbtw is wood here a euphemism for boner?
>>214752646
>>214752798Then make a thread on /adv/ budShame your OCD doesn't involve posting in the right thread
>>214752251Hope you get cancer and make recreational drugs to pay for your treatment and your family's future security and escalate your involvement in your local area's crime networks and die in a literally tragic end
is that him? NOOOOOOOOO. fuck my retard incel life
the original 'X:\ No Way Out' attraction was what is known as a soul catcher / soul stealer
neighbour's fuming. played knock down ginger on his door and he caught me
>>214752921I wish I were 95 kilos of muscles instead of fat>>214752924this is the funnier thread
Just want to say in advance I will not be partaking in booze toil tomorrow
>>214752921the male lopunny
>>214752837what do they call cheese logs?
Poo Chumbling
where are all the umchickens x
>we'd like to have an initial 20 minute conversation to dive deeper into your skills and experience>congrats, we'd like to move you to the next stage, a 45 minute interview>the interview went really well, for the next stage could you send us three writing samples and also complete this exercise for us in the allowed time?>thanks, we'd like to move you onto the next stage, a cognitive test followed by another 50 minute interviewfucks sake
The Feminine Mesquite
>>214752965why not
>>214752999Happen a lot in Germany?
Would a lobotomy cure autism?
>>214752911no it's wood
>>214752999*ghosts you after the final interview*nuffin personnel kido
is this one of rorke's most embarrassing moments yet?https://x.com/WokeratiMarty/status/1965817103010992397
hes so powerful and strong...lick
Getting my arse tore apart by a wild beastman
I have issues with my eyes so I've set the scaling on Firefox to 1.33 so that I can read the text better
>>214753016Living healthier
>Southport killer didn't look human, says teenagerBit racist that, had Trump calling that bloke an animal and now this
>>214753070ok
Time to eat breakfast
There's a special WarStrike episode TONIGHT. Don't miss it lads.
>>214753077well that's good
>>214752999Once had a 3 (THREE) hour interview and ended up getting a generic rejection email at the end of it all
>>214753093dont know what that is
I need a victory
>>214753020its an international company I'm applying for, fully remotebut yes>>214753052fully expecting this after my interview tomorrow>>214753109what kind of job was it
>>214753080I can read your reply now perfectly it's a miracle
>>214752999all this for a 12 quid an hour job shoving boxes around in an amazon warehouse
adeserved for not walking out after liek 1.5 hours
>>214753078if you have not yet noticed, since oct 2023 all the micro-aggressiony media narrative stuff that used to be pro-left is now racist and fascistic
Time to revive disco
lust invoking images
>>214753138toby
>>214752897The acid house. Its called like the fly or something
might go out later to the shop to buy milk
>>214753162I was doing something else as I wrote it
>>214753124Infrastructure support (upper end IT support runt) for a yank company, was fully remote too actually, fucking thing was two long technical interviews back to back
'ppears i can't loads webms.
>>214753189OHMY STATEYS STARTS ISHHWUTVWO TOH RNOONONONONOBONONONOBOBOBOOOOOOO
>>214753189not just you lad
leftypol inventing new moral standards that apply to everybody except him
>>214753189its over
I wonder if I'll ever escape my runtish slug-like NEET existence if I have to do several back-to-back interviews in order to gain a crumb of employment
I was sort of basically one with the "being alone" thing where I was not looking for a relationship. im still going to do it for a short time (need some alone time) and am not going to post how long but yeah I will go out and find someone and while I wait for them to do something go aggressively be available so that it puts more perceived value on myself. if you are limited-time you are worth more
>>214753167do you need milk?
Ok that is it off I go to the shop
>>214753245yeah
that limited-time being value, my expectation(s) is/are that if I put effort in to how I dress and carry myself then somebody will come find me
>>214753238get on the dating apps lad a lot of girls just want to fuck all you gotta do is ask them
>>214753189How about an mp4?
>>214753277couldnt do that but youre right what I need is intimacy and (if it applies to me, and then another need is to be able to buy clothes and shower) need to get over the fear of intimacy
The perfect one will knock on my door and take me away. Just gotta be patient. What if I'm out looking for someone and she comes and I miss her? Gotta stay put.
>>214753222that's just how it is nowadaysand everyones in the same boat so you're competing with loads of people which is how companies can get away with these drawn out applications, lots of runts to choose from
UMMMMMMMMMMMM!
>>214753280I dipped my willy in that glass
>>214753334lmao this is literally them with the autistic girls on VRchat (theyre talking about me!)
poo
>>214753189Ye i couldnt make a thread on /pol/ either
the Asian guy started hiding
>>214753376yeah?
(needs and expectations) but yeah thats about it, cya
ummy! UMMY UMMMMM ERRRRRR! UM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>214753456>>214753456>>214753456
>>214753413sadly this girl died after breaking her spine lordosising too hard :(
>>214753441btw if you take ssri/antipsychotic medications that can impact your ability to feel emotions and thereby stunt your ability to connect with women... cya
if you compliment a man you should expect his dick in return
