takes so long for me to cum on SSRIs my morning wank almost overran into daily standup today

austria beaten by one second
i'm so sorry

>>218952164
Both mid

>>218952124
Me in the back

>>218952164
Do you wish you were her?

drunk man outside going UUGH UUGH UUGH

feeling unhappy in my newly purchased first home again lads. I miss the flat I used to rent.

i so pale

good to know!

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gwan janny heem that runt

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New picture from the files

>>218952205
I deleted it

>he deleted it to repost it here
lmfao

>>218952220
do you have autism
is that why you post the same thing every day

it was a femboy in fishnets on the gay SPH subreddit that got me there

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New picture from the files

>>218952239
>SPH
bad for your soul

>>218952239
got you where?

tshirts are all feeling a bit tight. might be time to move up to an XL

QI XL on Dave
Propah hotel viewing

>>218952302
Spend lots of time at the gym yes?

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>BBC

haven't shaved in a week and my face is starting to itch. I think the last time I made it to 2-3 weeks before I got tired and killed the beard

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green

>>218952302
might be time to put the bedfordshire clangers down lad

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IMMA KEEP MY PANTS SAGGING

Fucks sake lads. The escort I've been seeing seems to get booked up really early.

Hate how there's a lack of good escorts where I live. She seems to be very popular.

I said to her last time we met that we could hopefully meet every 2 weeks and she seemed happy with that. Our next meeting is on Sunday. But I bet she'll get booked up by then for two weeks after that.

>>218952332
Mine starts itching after 3 days if I don't shave

>>218952332
power through it, it will stop itching

What are some legit ways of meeting girls outside of dating apps?

>>218952361
fuck off back to /britfeel/

>>218952371
Church

>>218952371
ermmm
dunno

>>218952377
>>218952402
ok rorke thanks

>>218952345
me tink laissez-faire economist been arrested by babylon

>>218952371
do your friend's gfs have friends?

He likes the black willies doesn't he?

>>218952361
haha wow this is just as good as that service station gay larp on /britfeel/ ahaha great stuff

umchickens umsemble !!!

whipped out my silly voice in front of the toilfu today and she didn't even crack a smile smfh

>>218952430
sc

>>218952371
clubs, societies, events and other random shit. anywhere that there will be people doing stuff together and minimal alcohol involved
but it's a lot of effort for not much higher chances than the apps so (you) will just keep using the apps anyway

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Irish-Jamaican craic

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>>218952421

>>218952430
You like the black willies don't you?

>>218952438
chicken is a paedophillic dogwhistle for their victims, you do know that right? It would be for the best if you stopped calling people that.

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>>218952438
>!!!
um
please don't raise your voice
thanks

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>>218952480

diddy blud just samefagged "sc" to his own post

>>218952490
it is also a british term of endearment :)

posting from my folder full of black man webms to own the /brit/ chuds

Diddy did he now, did he really?

three or four melties going on simultaneously
janny nowhere to be found, as per, presumed too busy wanking to /e/ to do his job

don't want to sleep

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>>218952549
did ye fuck you lying bastard

any stunted fools in?

>>218952547
me and umbunny

>>218952576
i fucking did!

i'm going to eat a biscuit not even joking

extra 50s worth of garlic

Just done an aliexpress wank

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Aah look afta your cheeldren sar

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>>218952595
Sure, pic unrelated.

im so outraged right now

Manchester Piccadilly is a fucking hellhole
Getting bus to campus and there’s a horde of drunk homeless cunts harassing the bus driver kek

>>218952535
what a piece of fucking shit
fucking pandering faggot, these faggots need to be crushed

>>218952547
us.

>>218952648
for me it's räucherlachs

Saudi Arabia dont like the flinstones

But Abu Dhabi do!

>>218952669
yeah they do that

>>218952686
sdcrimbling

load of dickheads on tonight
fuck off

>>218952704
Literally nothing out of the ordinary.

poo screaming at cat videos on tiktok

>>218952704
:(

room has that post-wank smell

Drunk man on the bus going ough ough ough
(Unironically)

>>218952686
dont get it

spiritually i feel like a serb

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Would suck her turds quite splendidly.

>>218952685
Probably crazy expensive nowadays, especially the shrimps.

>>218952748
this woman has been unemployed for 7 years
i outrank her

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LIV
ERP
OOL

>>218952748
that's a little girl

>>218952648
ERM WHERE THE FUCK IS COD AND CHIPS?

Having a Smirnoff ice after doing dry January it's lush

got bullied at school but it never gave me thick skin just made me into a bitch

>>218952758
16 is legal in my state.

>>218952772
>it's lush
*it lush

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>>218952748
Just be a physically repulsive multi-millionaire Hollywood Jew.

might put my long johns on

>>218952777
ktim

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>>218952766
no cod and chips tonight you're having this for tea

>>218952777
gave you a thick skull

>>218952777
Never got bullied because people knew I would try to kill myself and blame it on them

wish I had something to tell mumberg she thinks I dont want to tell her stuff I just quite literally never do anything not even leave the house

>>218952807
how me and the lads be looking after a night out

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quite nice actually

a wank then bed

genuinely hate my iPhone wish I could get a Samsung but unfortunately that would mean I’d never lose my virginity

i'm getting the feel they have a shiiiield generator

>>218952820
scrtim

>>218952845
girls don't care about that as much here, the blue/green text thing is an american meme

got the new edward dutton doc on

>>218952208
They are literally paedo files

>>218952820
tell her she failed you and no grandchildren are on the cards because of her

THIS IS MY LAST SERENADE

>>218952807
Vgh… Cornish food…

>>218952848
That can only mean invasion

Why did I have to become infatuated with one of the most popular escorts in my city? Fucking annoying.
I want to see her every 2 weeks but I just don't think that will be possible. Seems like she's only working limited days now.

hes browsing reddit

>>218952824
bodied that semite

>>218952807
Would totally eat that and even enjoy it, whilst a few pints deep.

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>First of all, I'm a woman

any young lads in the thread

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>Fucking annoying.

now he's browsing reddit
and my stomach is sick

>>218952876
Chewn that

stale gimmique, next

today the slightly chubby zoomer lass at toil asked me if I enjoyed eating pussy

>>218952820
Told mine I was off out tonight and she just said “you’re 26 not 16 you don’t need to tell me anymore”
Which is fair enough but like damn

>>218952940
was she chinese

>>218952940
give her the d

Another fake story deployed into the thread

>>218952942
does she have nice boobs?

workplace sexual harassment isn't a joke

>>218952976
Now why would you say that

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>>218952923

I'm honestly half tempted to try contacting the Russian escort again.
It's been like 3 months. Looking at her profile, she says she prefers texting. Maybe the mistake I made before was messaging on AdultWork?

Hey Chatgpt, I know first time buyer regret is normal, but is it normal to constantly flip between happy and unhappy in a newly purchased first home after a year?

ZAMN!
HIS TOUPEE CAME SMOOVE OFF!!

surely given what we know now about Andrew and Epstein, how Epstein had dinner at Buckingham palace aswell… starmer will do something in parliament to abolish the royal family? Don’t know how it works, is it like a bill that they vote on or a referendum like brexit?

leftypol convincing himself that his 300k newbuild is actually great quality and he doesn't mind the commute

>>218953008
Absolutely! And the fact that you are self aware about this is a great sign

>>218953016
starmer will do precisely nothing
none of them actually give a shit about any of it

>>218953008
Great question, you're really digging into a common concern for new buyers and you are not alone. Here's an emoji filled list explaining why your preferred viewpoint on this matter is objectively correct:

big spong guy pants okay

>>218953044
Yeah no thanks mate.
>>218953049
I don’t think that’s true he already fired mandelson

I report the posts but nothing happens. What gives?

SpongeBob big guy pants ok

>>218953067
he fired mandelson because trump clearly didn't like the guy
the epstein stuff was just a convenient excuse

mad how in the 60s there was a secret plan in place to have prince charles marry the daughter of the japanese emperor
imagine if that happened

spread em
i'll be there in half an hour

LADS TURN ON THE NEWS NOW
ITS HAPPENING OH MY GOD

>>218953082
What posts are you reporting

>>218953103
What is

>>218953087
The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and Japan .....

>>218953103
omg SpongeBob is big enough to ride the big guy rollercoaster

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>>218953103
It's over.

>>218953105
The rule-breaking ones

>>218953111
it's all kicking off in cheadle

well at least today was not a total waste as i learnt why i always stop breathing when going to sleep and nearly die

>>218953111
they've nuked

Ada Wong sex legs

anne hathaway is English apparently but I don’t get it because I’ve never seen any English woman who even comes close to looking like her so

>>218953146
is it because you're a fat alcoholic

>>218953173
she married shakespeare
how much more english can you get

>>218953173
she doesn't really look american either

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deary me it hurts to read

>>218953173
She was literally married to William Shakespeare.

IT HAPPENED.
THE HAPPENING FINALLY HAPPENED. PANIC

>>218953190
Gary replied to Mousey

>>218953173
surely she's jewish

>>218953103
HOLY SHIT

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Good evening, fellow third worlders.

>>218953103
THEY HIT THE PENTAGON

>>218953103
MANDELSON NOOOO

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>>218953204
>>218953103
fuck me it's true
he's finally gone

>>218953180
no i routinely hyperventilate so your body compensates by slowing down breathing to get rid of oxygen, but also brain loses oxygen at the same time and then you pass out and stop breathing

>>218953215
he should move to Barnsley

>>218953215
only london is 3rd world
the londoners that post here will cope and seethe but its true

>>218953243
oh that's weird
do they have a machine to fix it for you?

>>218953255
>london is 3rd world
didn't know you had to pay FOUR FUCKING POUNDS for a coffee in a third world country

george floyd big guy pants ok

>>218953243
Why would you do that?

screaming and shitting through the neighbours letterbox at 3am

MANDELSONS ON TOP OF THE BBC NEWS BUILDING REQUESTING A MEETING WITH THE KING

>>218953260
no, just have to stop panicking

Need to take a picture in Paris and stand where he stood

You want to know what’s incredibly humorous? The elimination of waste and the expulsion of feces.

my shitty desk lamp fell on my knee and is now broken. Im gutted :((((((

spongebob big guy sex arse

im rather windy this evening

>>218953190
There's a whole community like this on YT

TURN ON THE TV ANY CHANNEL LADS THE QUEEN'S DIED

>>218953306
ive done that in Rome

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>>218953332
Alri Emma

>>218953306
- massive fan of Vincent Cassel as made famous by the seminal 1995 film La Haine

sisberg unironically buying a £3k sofa from furniture village

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>>218953334
>watwat
it's real

>>218953361
she fit?

>>218953361
i got a £500 one from ikea and it isn't very comfy

>>218953374
>watwat
in the butt

praise kek

>>218953361
can i shag her on it?

>>218953404
shadilay

Have not had a proper poo in days, seems to get bits out but never a full meaty ass clearing shit and I end up feeling like I need to poo later

Remember this
https://desuarchive.org/int/thread/209969102/

rorke's gone gay lads.

>>218953361
can i shag her up the arse?

>>218953361
If the idea is to never buy another again it won't be all bad

if i was a girl i would stick things up my fannard on cam

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>>218952997

if i were a girl i'd shag incels
charitable sort me

>>218952148
couldnt cum for 5 weeks when i first started them

>>218953426
Fiber intake ok?

>>218953443
same

>>218953436
rememebr what

>>218953334
bats are really cool and they fly around you to learn your shape using sonar

>>218953306
>where he stood
Whomst?

>>218953426
i wake up in the morning have a double espresso suck on the vape then suck on a nicotine pouch then drink a glass of water
let me tell you that sets the floodgates open

>>218953481
I think so, might go mental tomorrow and eat as much fibre as possible

>>218953334
For me? leather flapper

Rorke sticking it to the Student Loans Company by not having a job for 40 years

>>218953490
when 4chan went down and we ghost posted on the last /brit/ for ten days

>>218953530
KTIM KTIM KTIM

right armpit always stinks more than the left

>>218953511
they dont need to fly around you many times to realise your a fat cunt

is this the year Attenborough dies?

>>218953538
we were all on the sharty

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Jack Roworth

Actually fucking funny unlike sad cases such as Seaside Mark or Timothy James Byrne

>>218953334
>naked night one
KTIM

>>218953436
The sweltering hack of '25

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>>218953379
>>218953413
>>218953440
>>218953441
>If the idea is to never buy another again it won't be all bad
it's a fucking leather chesterfield it won't be comfy

https://www.furniturevillage.co.uk/shackleton-4-seater-leather-chesterfield-sofa-with-usb-c/SHAC4SU-LTH-001.html

lmao

>>218953545
look mate this is the second time i've been called a fat cunt for no reason in the span of 20 minutes i am not having it

wish i wasnt so sad and ill

>>218953538
>4chan went down
no it didnt

>>218953573
Looks comfy to me
What's wrong with it?

>>218953560
Buy an ad you reform freak

I love life, I love my wife, I love my house, I love my son, my job my hobbies. Everything in my life is perfect and I am content.

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>>218953573
What the fuck

>>218953577
its your fat aura coming through the way you type

>>218953573
tracking sales of this now
will be shagging every woman that has bought one of these in the last week

>>218953334
>flutter mouse
not allowed to post either of these

>>218953560
>pies, likker, mash, cuppa'f coffee
Would

Myself I just shag my girlfriend. Don't even have to pay

>>218953560
What kind of greedy pig gets three pie and three mash

>>218953605
no flat surfaces on a chesterfield for induction charging

>>218953601
>I love my son
bender

GIGA wank is on the cards

>>218953643
You don’t have a girlfriend though? You’re a virgin

Do not talk to women and I am not happy nor content (no I won't start talking to them)

>>218953664
>GIGA
What's that stand for?

>>218953661
Grow up

>>218953681
Gooning
In
Granny’s
Attic

>>218953601
>wife
Post hand with timestamp, make sure your wedding ring is visible. You won’t, they never do. Every single little lying freak on here who goes on about “muh wife” gets called out and vanishes without ever proving it

sucking on the ball out of a guinness can

I'm literally going to kill myself if I can't move out of this terraced house and into a detached

>>218953700
I don't need to prove it to you. You'll just have to trust me

women have such shit taste in women's clothing
would trust a woman to dress a man more than to dress herself

>>218953722
i hate living with other people who can bitch about my unit's weed smell

my parents made a mistake giving birth to me

>>218953530
could pay it off in full today. Will not be doing that though

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Listening to Sleep Token and playing poker

>>218953700
I proved last week when I was shopping with the missus that nothing would satisfy you and you would always find some excuse to discredit it

Bingo, another one who can’t prove it. Add that to the tally

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>>218953699
bit o' me that lad

>>218953739
quit after first semester did you

https://youtu.be/f7K1zGNUtSA

£100 monthly overpayment on mortgageberg

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1.1 MB MP4

Need to CHUG!

i have no friends, no one cares about me apart from my disabled, decrepit parents and my sister who lives far away

>>218953757
>People can't be married, not in 2026!
Grow up, people get married. Why does it bother you so much?

>>218953643
You pay for her in other ways

new gilf gf just dropped

https://www.tiktok.com/@lizroseofficial/video/7511931332327410951

>>218953761
Sick jacket

>>218953771
nah i graduated 8 years ago

>>218953737
ktim

>>218953750
Oh god you’re so pathetic i remember you.
“I’m out shopping with my wife”
Oh yeah? Take a photo of the shop you’re in
“Well no because you just won’t believe me”
I will if you take the photo
“No you wont”

You got added to the tally mate. Another lying little freak bye bye

>>218953796
We care mate

preformatively getting addicted to porn

patting my bed with my hand very quickly and pretending i'm doing blast beats as an elite drummer in a heavy metal band

Me and the missus shan't be having kids, although I am a bit nervous about what I'll do when I'm an old man and won't have anyone to care for me. That's not a good enough reason to force someone into existence imo

>>218953784
>Benedict Wong on the set of Prometheus (colourised)
Nice. Now let's see Guy Pearce nosechug a schooner of ale

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>>218953761
no fucking way hes still around

>>218953797
People do get married. YOU however are not married and you don’t have a son. You got added to the tally, weird little freak.

>>218953796
Wanna go fishing lad?

>>218953821
HINT: you'll have tons of money that you didn't waste raising kids

>>218953835
You have a tally of people supposedly lying to you, and you have the gall to call other people freaks? Go to bed you little weirdo.

>>218953838
Yeah but I'll be alone

Why did I have to become infatuated with one of the most popular escorts in my city? Fucking annoying.

I want to see her every 2 weeks but I just don't think that will be possible. Every 3 weeks maybe.

Wish there were more women like her to do escorting.

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the gfberg
as she were

raping my own arse at 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999mph

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1.94 MB MP4

>>218953334
>skin thing

mega meltdown

>>218953821
>I am a bit nervous about what I'll do when I'm an old man and won't have anyone to care for me.

don't worry robot nurses will abuse you in your old age

>>218953853
Rattled because I see straight through your lies
Bye bye

>>218953799
She's not that old she just doesn't dye her hair

I've wanked to many old tarts

>>218953837
yeah
i go carp fishing
just recently set up a carp rig with a shit ton of that round bait

Listening to PANTERA. Getting my groove on. DO NOT stand in my fucking way.

>>218953867
fuck up

Would you want a pornstar as a girlfriend?

Would you want an escort as a girlfriend?

Trying to work out which would be better.

>>218953900
Well we'd probably never meet up but if I did then I'd take you fishing near me. Have carp and coarse gear

>>218953901
always listen to pantera when i'm doing my incel workouts

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>>218953875

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nearly got the jackpot

imagine the money you could make with a nicotine energy drink

>>218953901
Panetra is a bit racist lad. You give me the ick

>>218953934
need these little weirdos out of business

someone else needs to make the new
i've made 4 today

>>218953799
shame about the accent

>>218953934
and that's why nosferatu was an incel

>>218953883
That's okay I'll just go hug my wife

>>218953954
wont me me im off ti bed

new

>>218954010

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Good Nigh, /brits/. Tomorrow is another busy day of being NEET.