bjork edition
it's only after you lose everything that you're free to do anything
What's for brekkie, /brit/?Beans from a can with leftover mediterranean sauce.
wonder if the cat knows i love her
three hand solo wank on the cards
>>219008756Family is always saying our cat loves me but l dont think they're capable of understanding love and they just see us as a kind protective companion
>>219008756post kot
wish it was saturday and not thursday
>>219008749porridge :)
>I promised myself I'd sell at 150?exactly and that would be the final push. my house deposit. I feel sick. every morning I feel sick. why why why have I done this
>>219008756>>219008773humans don't know love either I don't thinkit's just a word meant to mean attachment, familiarity, trust and in the cases of romantic love, lust
fuck y'all
>>219008828y'all'dn't've
odds - greggsevens - macciesdubs - porridge
>>219008880looks like a fast for you
shouldnt invest in stocks unless youre riskans even then you should be using an extremely low risk index fund which has a reliable 10% yield in the long run even if some years you may lose as much as 40%
Remember when everyone got fat in 2006?
watching second fantano interviewjust a smug assholeand he does that fing wherr you close your eyes or look up in some weird driection when making a point and it looks really smug and gay and soylent
My name is Maturbatio and I am Italian.
>>219008918*check flaf* sure you are lol, gabagool
>>219008901Got fat starting 2020, when I started alcoholism (but the beer drinking and slop eating kind, not skinny vodka type).
>>219008719how many of you have actually listened to bjørk? i give this thread to an army of me, in credit of heer artist.
>>219008787must you make fun of my despairthis sets me back YEARS I will be a houseshare wagie forever
>>219008895>extremely low risk index fund>has a reliable 10% yieldjokes on you if youre not bracing for the end of capitalism as we know it
>flaf
>>219008959i've listened to all of her albums. i love her.
woke up and immediately thought about the ex toilfu award
>>219008970how many years of work did you flush down the drain do you think?
wonder if my lady knows i love her
>>219008991How does one brace for that if you cannot afford a homestead?
get a sharp chest pain every time I sneeze, am I dying
>>219009022i think i'm dying too! twins!
>>219009022yep
>>219009005at least two if it stops here but I'd feel like I right mug if I sold nowmight sell it if it recovers to 90 at this point just to stem the bleeding fuck
>>219008719*attacks you*
showertoil looms
what if bjork was a right wing incelbjorke if you will
>>219009062i made this joke a few days ago :/
grin and bear it
>>219009072dont see your name on it
>>219009050shan't be showering todaynever had any complaints from my colleagues about a whiff so I reckon I get away with it>no anon they talk about it behind your backnah, my bond with my colleagues is strong enough that we straight up tell each other stuff like that
>>219009072This has been debunked btw
>>219009072not nice to lie
>>219009082so you just sit around all day wearing last night's sweat and grease? regardless of smell that must just suck
>>219009102I got a shower last night, then had a big glass of gin, fell asleep for half an hour and went for a shower because I'd forgotten I'd just had one. proper mad me you know
>3 Teen Sisters Jump to Their Deaths from 9th Floor Apartment After Parents Remove Access to Phone
>>219009050I do it first thing in the morning now because I'm trying to lose weight so get on the scale naked straight after my morning pee. Then it makes mkre sense to just shower since I'm already naked.
>>219009122
>>219009122parents utterly mugged offbet they regret that decision
Portsmouth 7-4 Reading
>>219009136>The girls were identified as sisters Nishika, 16, Prachi, 14, and Pakhi, 12. The eldest victim's name has also been identified as Vishika, per NDTV. >This detailed their love for online gaming and what appeared to be a fixation on Korean culture, Kumar, their father, told NDTV. >PTI reported that they were obsessed with a "Korean game that involved a series of tasks" and that the three girls largely spent time at home, having not gone to school in two years. reckon they might've been artistic
>>219009136the old harikari mug off is it lad
>>219009102I'm not fat so I don't get sweaty at all on an average day unless I have to do a lot of manual labour which rarely happens at toil. I put on fresh clothes still obviously and a bit of deodorant, job done
so glad i majored in computer science
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5I3SbdHSteE
Doing a massive toilpoo
thicc
>>219009176for me it's when he and the hilarious jack whitehall ordered pizza on the big fat quiz
>>219009185remember when he met mr blobby haha
>>219009166he's making a valid and respectable point there, this isn't one of those "toilstein wants you to bend over and like it" deals
>>219009179love LOVE being paid to take a long relaxing poo
forgot to put the bins out AGAIN
>>219009196haha i love jack so much. real down to earth lad and hilarious to boot
good morning you infantile cunts poo again is it?
>>219009185i met jack whitehall once
>>219009253no, not poohttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1wDihZNQyQ
>>219009253*checks some poo-stained notes*.....yh
>>219009254im jealous. how'd it go?
>>219009280i'm sorry i lied
Ruth Wilson's musky tuppence
you know what fuck the post numbers I'm going to greggs regardless
>>219009254i used to live in the same apartment building as gok wan
>>219009304not on mate. not on at all
>>219009314Did you hear him being bummed all night every night?
>>219009311boooooofucking booooooooooooorespect the rules of the game, philistinebooooooooooooooo
odds i drink a gallon of milkevens i go to sleep hungrydubs i cut my bollocks off
>>219009344um
the toil freaks will be waking up soon and going straight to toil looool
>>219009359woke up at 3am me fretting about all the things i didn't manage to finish during yesterday's toil
>>219009321i really really like this apu
FUCK ENGLAND *fornicates with a fissure in the walll*
had a dream that I got a centre parting
what are the swedes up to
i think arabs take their culture from tiktok because they have nothing else
feeling incellish this morning
>>219009344Please don’t cut your bollocks off tilde
>>219009397We're living good
>>219008719kyoot bjork
>>219009403https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDudIT93m_s
>>219009416
>>219009323*ignores the boos as i make a swift exit*
>>219009464kek this is me
apparently the six nations starts todaywho knew?dead sport
imagine fucking 1990 sinead oconnor up her pasty white irish arse and then cumming all over her shaved head
>>219008719love Björk
coffee-stain butthole
>>219009501make her apologise for ireland's centuries of perfidy whilst you massage her scalp with a gloopy load, eh lad? you're sick
>>219009497more honourable than watching negroball
>>219009403
just imagined myself boxing someone and hitting him so hard he got knocked out but also my arm broke right in the middle and was flopping around
Sipping a lemsip max to ward off the cold
>>219009531The sacred and the propane...
>>219009531midwit screed
>>219009531thats 'sheed done
why do so many people misspell Mandelson as Mandleson?reading some discussions online the misspellers almost seem like the majority
>>219009625shit nobody cares about
why is the porn industry so keen on promoting anal sex and black dicks and incest?
>>219009668that's what third worlders want
>>219009668jews
visiting the American gf soon got any good snacks to share?
>>219009694poo
>>219009694dog
Remember when Gordon Brown sold all of the UK's gold at rock-bottom prices so we could bail out banks that caused the financial crisis haha? X
Look at this guy is caught on a sticky trap
Im in Shanghai rn, ask me anything. Posting through a vpn because, y’know.
get the stoli swallowed
>>219009717get any fanny?
>>219009531lot of words when you could’ve just said that most brown people aren’t self-aware
Is he cooked Brit?
>>219009741it seems so not that it matters in any way
just whiffed it big time on geoguesser, mistook the Chilean flag for an American one
>>219009728Nah I’m too autistic.
>>219009741he might get away with it by sacking McSweeney, at least until the by-election
>>219009741if i was him id just say no im not stepping down dont be stupid and carry on as normal. hes a pussy though so i wouldnt put it past him to get bullied out
why do the biggest alkies tend to prefer vodka? i know it's easier to mix because of its neutrality but the alkies i'm talking about drink it straight from the bottle
>>219009775someone on here told me its the most cost effective way to get drunk
>>219009775cheap strong dont want to drink litres of liquid not acually thirsty just want to be drunk
>>219009741the real clown world realization is that Angela Rayner is his most likely successor
>>219009775used to be gin in that role for centuries but vodka is cheaper now
unironically miss ssm a lot and hope he’s okay his hour long morning uploafs were a source of comforting background noise for me in my evil lonely incel life
>>219009254Cor he done it with Gemma Chan
>>219009154>pakhiget the bradlies posted
mad how AI is still shit but people are still insane and stupid enough to fall in love with chatbots and think they're sentient
starmers resigned
>>219009554I swig cod liver oil for that
>>219009867no he hasnt shut up
>>219009878i'm walking about the football playier
Grey and dark out once againWet but not rainingStruggling to remember what the sun used to look like
>>219009787>>219009794>>219009807you don't saycask wine (goon) is the drink of choice for alcos on a budget because for some reason it's the only thing the government doesn't tax to buggery
the water in the well is frozen fuck me
>know mandelson is an absolute wrong-un for years>do nothing
>>219009893Its February. Nobody cares about the sun
can't find my external hard drive that has all my porn on it fucks sake
>>219009893the sun was out yesterday
>>219009913It's very difficult to take nice photos with such flat nothing lightingAt least for someone with my limited capabilities
>>219009914perhaps it's for the best mate
>>219009914Perhaps the goon pixies have stolen it
>>219009947It’s ideal for photographing people.
>>219009893go back to africa if u love the sun so much
>>219009915it's out every day
>>219008895For me? It's VWRL.
Injected the wegovy but i dont feel anything.
mental the uk has a clear view of yankland going off the deepend with trump and co. and have decided "cor yeh give me some of that"really are america's little lapdogs
for some reason I've got my bum out
>>219009901we can get big bags of wine here too that would be my pick if I was going down the achy route
woke up and now im consuming far right propaganda on X formerly twitter
>>219010058Shut the fuck up you Labour-voting Paki-loving grooming gang apologist
West Africans marching in Spain
>>219010071im none of those things you slanty eyed cunt
Literally can't get my head around this... You post shit on Twitter and get sent to jail but you can fracture a police woman's spine and deal £1M worth of damage in the name of those glorified shit hole run by a terrorist organisation and you get away with it. Fuck this 2 tier justice system like
opened a tin of tuna labelled "tuna in oil", expecting olive oil as is usually the case with generic "tuna in oil" tunas, only for it to be some sort of flavourless fucking woke vegetable oil needless to say my disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined
>>219010038go choke on a sanger you flamin galah
>>219010094for me its tuna in brine
>>219010081Britroaches chose to use the last ten years importing infinity jeets and Africans, covering up the activities of grooming gangs, implementing Sharia law in most urban centers, demonizing the native British identity and making Adolescence on Netflix, all the while stuffing their fat fuck faces with Greggs sausage rolls.I have come to the understanding that the British view of lower class kids getting raped by foreigners is “that’s what they deserve for having the nerve to be born low class”. It is an entire country of Owen Joneses. Brits are perfectly fine with child rape. Its why they got Starmer into office. A man who defended child rapists as the director of public prosecution for many years. Brits are all pedos or at the very least, cowards, equally bad. Imagine watching a gang rape in progress and doing nothing, even if said victim is your daughter. Thats what brits do. You can't spell "cuck" without the UK. It’s rare I’ve ever felt such visceral disgust and hatred in my life
>>219009741I kinda feel bad for Starmer here.Everyone knows Trump is a massive pedo so he knew Mandelson was the perfect person to help with US relations when Trump was spazzing about with tariffs. But obviously Starmer can't say any of that out loud
>>219010081its Bristol
>>219010094tinned fish are one of the few examples where paying extra for the fancy option is totally worth it
>>219010117>You can't spell "cuck" without the UK.WILL be stealing this one x
>>219010117Trvke
>>219010094That is something I miss about NZ. Over there tuna in oil the standard is olive oil. In the UK the standard is sunflower oil. In olive oil is the luxury and 3x the price.
>>219009901I would note that vodka is for drunkards who have at least some money. The homeless have to resort to what gets them the most alcohol per millilitre at the lowest cost which would be cheap cider like frosty jacks. This likely doesnt apply in scotland and southern ireland because they cant handle their drink and have had to introduce minimum prices for a unit of alcohol to avoid their entire countries collapsing. Without these rules their entire populations would have by now decided to totally abandon life and get on the drink.
>>219010117rent free
Sir Starmer
>>219010151Yeah this is what I drink because it fuels my evenings of watching telly. I need something that will last the night. I can happily drink a litre of vodka but far too expensive.
>>219010158each and every word he said is 100% true kek be grateful a bumbling foreigner is dishing out real critique instead of "lol britbong food sux" or some shit
>>219010168
saw mr hitchens waiting for a rail replacement bus in didcot stationi said hello mr hitchens im a big fan and he just ignored me
lord peter file
>>219010094>>219010120>tunaimagine voluntarily eating fish this high in the food chain, aka nature's mercury concentratorsespecially when sardines exist
its over
