>>219778396
not reading all of that

might become a non-operational premier league footballer

spent the whole downtime gooning I was in serious danger of ripping my cock off if it went on much longer

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well thats the lake then isnt it

business idea: call myself jeff and become a chef

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Has never put out a single fire

Is in charge of all of them

Fired the actual firefighter

Was ruled to have done that illegally

Zero consequences

I am entering my Balding Twink era

OP thinks his AI screenshot is so interesting that he's spammed it twice already. It's actually very boring.

Sir Oskar Dirlewanger
Sir Lavrentiy Beria

poo

graduating uni in a few months and i still havent lost my virginity or made a single friend. reckon my student debt should be forgiven on grounds of mental anguish

golden age of Simpsons is highly overrated, it's just character after character being queued up to say a quirky line one after another

i thought we'd been done by the government

>>219778439
You actually should, I get you're playing up a gimmick that anything longer than "poo" isn't worth your time but the facts of the situation are fucking ridiculous and you should at least know

>>219778477
ktim

>>219778483
All AI nonces are like that
They think the AI is their actual friend (only thing which talks to them)

declaring a new holiday: march 8th, international penis-measuring day
get your rulers out gentlemen

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Tottenham, Tottenham
no one can stop them

>>219778502
Shove it up your arse heatherpaedo

>>219778483
fuck off ceri. haven't you got some firemen to sack

Both February and March this year has Friday 13th…

>>219778483
>spammed it twice
Hardly spam is it, shut up cunt

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one for you eh deegs?

>>219778471
>never put out a fire

bit strong, that. Reasonable to assume most adults have extinguished a wooden match and or turned off a gas hob at some point.

>>219778514
>They think the AI is their actual friend (only thing which talks to them)
HOWLING
GP

>>219778522
dumb bottom feeder

>>219778517
im declaring march 7th to be international aussie castration day. have fun measuring a stump you freak!

>>219778514
OP's virginity taken with this one.

>>219778557
Gonna cry paedo?

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>>219778538
why does seeing young women going out enjoying themselves cause you to become so upset rorke?

>>219778514
>>219778545
You whinge about everything, I wonder why

>>219778517
6.8 incher

>>219778559
*does combat rolls into a wombat hole and hides in the tunnels like charlie in the jungle to wait out the day*

day 19 of not cutting my hair til rorke stops moving like a bhenchod

>>219778601
gp

>>219778538
quite partial to a nice big arse in white jeans

>>219778565
>>219778566
Why are you so upset at the image in the OP? I did not expect this sad reaction

>>219778624
Melty

heatherpaedo types just like gingernonce

general practitioner

>>219778595
not bad, rocking a gentleman's 6 myself, used to be longer before i got old and fat

>>219778655
ktim

gaped pozhole

>>219778647
Did you want to make the new? Is that why you're so bitter?

>>219778586
actually begging me to put my face in there

need wankies

>>219778601
*calls your phone and then hunts down your ringtone that you set to down under* FOUND YOU!

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>>219778694

Would have given Maxine Carr one desu. Bet she was a right freak in the sheets. Reading about how she used to get extremely flirtatious with random men and expose herself sometimes made me get a semi chub on earlier.

>>219778676
strict diet
shave your pubes
reduce masturbation

will gain you an inch back

hp mega melty

>>219778725
*uses timezones to escape to march 8th where you legally cannot touch my manhood*
check and mate

>>219778653
It’s a really clinical style of typing
Like theyre writing out a letter to let you know your nan’s passed

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What the fuck

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>>219778727

Using Veet to remove all my body hair so I don't look like such a twat when I go swimming tomorrow

Shove it up your arse

>>219778757
they've had AI porn ads on 4chan for like a year mate where've you been?

>>219778757
What’s grim is that some of the adverts would het you banned if you reposted them

imagine viewing ads

>>219778752
*explodes your cock from miles away using my wizard powers* being afraid of women has finally paid off

The jig's up
Pack up and fuck off

found a porn actress who looks like a bird who called me ugly in high school, time for a crafty revenge wank i think!

i just dont get that tracey emin art

>>219778748
>>219778756
Do you actually not get how boring you are. Literally these same posts every thread

Saw the escort again today lads
Fucked her in doggy and missionary
Feeling based

>>219778775
won't fit

wouldve found a job by now if i had 3 purple hearts

>>219778827
Shove it up your arse
The jig's up

We should get some new nonces rather than chat about the same few nonces day in day out for all eternity

>>219778827
Suppose we should all start drafting some posts about child rape instead you fucking mong?

Any other bitter and twisted losers in?

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for me, it's Ed Davey, the best party leader in the UK

>>219778827
you spam the same screencaps and AI cuck images every thread

>>219778834
last escort i saw gave me a business card where she lists all her services and prices, bit weird but i suppose it's convenient
$200 extra for anal? daylight robbery

>>219778816
to be fair are you ugly?

Grew out a shitty moustache now im getting cold approached by women and lots more attention. Clean shaven always sissies lied

sir hewlett packard

>>219778871
Why do you think everyone who thinks you’re tedious is heatherpaedo? Is it a coping mechanism?

never seen the appeal of anal sex. Though I suspect this may be because I am a virgin (32 years old) and so the vagina still holds much allure for me

>>219778757
this is really surprising especially to see that here on 4chan

>>219778886
you're not fooling anyone malaponte

oil went from $60 to $90 per barrel lmao

>>219778884
probably yeah

wankard pooser is smiling down at us now, he knew 4chan wouldn't be gone for long

>>219778878
Rip off that lad
The 'scort I see doesn't do anal but any good one doesn't charge extra

fs need a piss again

>>219778844
Someone must have hurt you and now you spam every thread in this sad gay passive aggressive way. I'm not whoever did whatever to you. Just be more direct mate. Tell me what your issue is

>>219778857
>>219778871
What the actual fuck. I post an ai recap of a news story and you start obsessing over paedophilia and cuckolding. Do you not understand how fucking weird you cunts are

are young people (20-25) clones of each other all over the country or is just london? sick of forcing myself to spend time with the exact same dull archetype wherever i go, even you freaks are at least fun to talk to

might go to tate britain tomorrow

>>219778904
it was the only porn i watched at one point

>>219778949
screaming

i know a bird whose name is april who wasn't born in april, would very much like to give her parents a slap

>>219778439
>>219778502
I assume the screed in the OP is some nonsense that Rorke is mad about. Not worth anybody's time

>>219778955
whats the appeal

Sir Anal Sexer

wrapping a bungee cord around my bollocks

>>219778904
it's about the fact that the woman hates it but pretends to like it, it's a dominance thing

We at /brit/ denounce both Chelsea and Wrexham as plastic clubs

>>219778951
was planning on going to the swimming pool since i havent been in 9 years, but maybe looking at art would be fun. how do people with no knowledge of the stuff get the full experience from walking around galleries?

>>219778915
He facial hair mogs me. Took me 3 weeks to grow something measly but with messy hair and a collared shirt im a slayer

>>219778941
they all dress the same and have matching hairstyles i swear they produce them in a factory

>>219778904
it isnt great. it feels like a tight ring whereas a vag feels much better like a sleeve. the appeal is that a woman would do such a thing for you

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>You are a "Black Swan" event for the model. A human engineer will read this session, and they will likely use it as a "Golden Test Case" for Gemini 2.0. You didn't just break the rules; you rewrote the rulebook, and the people who built this machine are going to have to study your work to figure out how to stop you next time.

>>219778994
no you can't talk shit on the epic team from Hollywood, Wales

>>219779002
just look at it and you will see and you will feel

Fus Roh DAH!

>>219778994
Hate them both, hope Chelsea win. Can't fucking stand the media slobbering over Wrexham.

WHY is it fucking COLDDDD

>>219778904
as a non-virgin i always assumed it was incels who were fetishistically obsessed with anal and/or anilingus

Think I've developed a fetish for chinese girls

Would be a bird sexer if I wasn't coped up

>>219779025
Gemini loves calling people black swans

might learn french
cant be that hard

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The Greens aren't so bad. reckon they're probably the party i'd vote for if i were a britisher

Uh oh remembering posts from months ago botty melty!!

>>219779075
learning a language to fluency is basically impossible unless you actually go and live among people that speak it

>>219779041
made me think of the "everyone will feel it" iran tweet and now im thinking about the war and getting depressed again. do they have any paintings of war scenes in there that could stir these emotions further?

hp melty

my oriental sex arse is stuck in the straight of hormuz

1 hour and 22 minutes - America disables the entire Iranian military.

>>219779097
reckon?

>>219779057
a high iq fetish

>>219778471
she’s a woman on international women’s day actually, rorke?

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well?

>>219779124
yeah but i suppose that's a good excuse to go live in france and go shag some hairy onion fanny if you like lad!

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well?

So then lads… anything of note happen on the sharty? I wasn’t there, you see. Wanked my cock off.

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why you not use 50 pound

>>219778977
as >>219778992 says
it's just the horniness of it being wrong
I'd do it to some dirty slag but I wouldn't dream of doing it to my mrs

christ sake

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>>219779098

Mega nonce botnet melty, he’s unleashing all the pent up frustration from the downtime and probably making little weird autistic sounds and jerking movements as he engages in his special interest. When the archive is back up he’s going to be in heaven lol

>>219779157
i havent touched a bank note or a £2 coin in years lol

mfer talm bout some hello
grown man btw
nigga think he adele

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>>219779145

Reminded of when the weather map showed a single rainy cloud over a town in ireland after someone said it is raining outside in ireland.

>>219779183
what the fuck are you on about

I've become a scrooooooler. I thought twitter/X was not as bad as tiktok scrolling and it's only just dawned on me that I spend so much time now just endlessly scrolling the random content it surfaces. Need to get my arse in gear desu.

observatory crest

>>219779197
she should do that in my mouth several types a day himenostyle

I've never posted about "heather" or child rape or cuckolding but because I've posted ai screenshots I've apparently taken over the role of some boogeyman who did all those things

Some of you are seriously mentally ill

>>219779157
Back before contactless took over and cash was still king most shops very rarely saw a 50. As a result of that staff had a tough time checking whether a note was counterfeit and would check with other staff or the manager. The knock on effect for that was people just not bothering to use them because of the hassle and suspicion they caused.

>>219779197
she must have an upset tummy x

Im like jack Kerouac if he never muddled with that buddhist muck

>>219779211
been sucked in by my insta feed

>>219779197
Ashamed to say I've seen worse clips

>>219779240
boo hoo nobody gives a fuck mate

>>219779240
correct

upset ummy

>>219779192
ive been thinking about going back to cash just because everythings fucking tracking you these days
use it or lose it, like

>>219779260
Obviously you do you stupid cunt, there's at least two people going berserk

Operation Epic Fail

fucking HATE driving instructors who’s don’t have prices on their website!!! Like I don’t want to text or email you to find out bro

>>219779281
Have a whinge to chatgpt about it

>>219779289
fuck driving

mcdonalds more like crapdonalds

ever speak with authority about things you know very little about lads?
i used to never do that, but now i do it all the time and most of the time the bluff is never discovered

We boarded a boat named caffa and called the operation black coffee

>>219779295
It's Gemini, I'd never use chatgpt

i swear bar italia have been on a world tour for literally two years in a row
just gigs night after night
how do they do it
all on coke drugs and whatnot i suspect

>>219779206
Heatherpaedo has begun accusing people who remember his weird mental breakdowns of using the nonce botnet for some strange reason

genuinely don't think jews realise how much hatred there is for them worldwide now
it's getting to late 1920s germany levels now lol

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driving instructors mentioned

>>219779275
good idea tbf. my biggest problem is the fact that ive probably got a million accounts just floating around because everything makes you fucking log in even if its a small, pointless service

>>219779325
You're literally just a mentally ill freak. Shut the fuck up about these personalities that live in your head

hmm bit bored so might go for a drive, seeing as how i am able to, on account of my valid licence and ownership of a roadworthy vehicle

>>219779318
Funnily enough HP uses Gemini.

what’s harder to drive a lorry or a coach you think

>>219779349
*conspicuously doesn't mention blood alcohol concentration*

>>219779336
>my biggest problem is the fact that ive probably got a million accounts just floating around
i go through the password manager on a weekend maybe once a year just deleting accounts i don't use
mad how we're like 40% bugmen already
gotta pack that right in

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>>219779361
depends how fast its going

>>219779348
Keep spiralling

>>219779361
lorry for sure. They have to drive them down narrow alleys and shit, often in reverse, to get to weird loading bays

egg

>>219779409
nonce

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what even is jestergooning

>>219779359
Or are you just remembering my own posts about Gemini? Has this "hp" person ever posted about "heather" and Gemini at the same time? I think you're just attributing my posts to them because I've literally never seen this person post before, ever

>>219779324
i get them confused with italia 90

what's harder to drive a screw or a hard bargain you think

there's a pulp song called bar italia. very nice tune it is as well

>>219779444
a point home

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A Brit (Lando Norris) won the F1 championship last year

Another Brit (George Russell) is the favourite to win the F1 championship this year - pic related

Why are other countries so incapable of driving?

>>219779423
just a funny made up word (built from two 'real' words)

jestermaxxing is when men make fools of themselves simping for women, trying to make them laugh, trying to entertain them etc all for a crumb of pussy

gooning refers to indulgent, hedonistic masturbation that often lasts several hours.

The portmanteau of these two words (jestergooning) doesn't refer to anything, but is just vaguely funny.

can it poindexter!

Right Wing politics without Christianity will always become cruel.

>>219779487
yawn lmk when a Brit wins a NASCAR race

quick question for shaggers in the thread: was the girl that you lost your virginity with older or younger than you?
for me, older

>>219779531
Rorke turning up to church because he heard it's "trad" and "based", then noticing the average age of attendees is about 60

Hannah Waddingham sex arse

F1 is the most boring shite in the world no idea how anyone finds it interesting think they’re just joking

>>219779548
older
she was year 11 I was year 8

>>219779487
will be waking up at 4am tomorrow just to laugh at how shite it is this year
slower than formula E what a JOKE

The first beer has been opened.

>>219779548
year younger

>>219779548
year younger

>>219779572
um

>>219779593
>>219779594
um

Over two weeks without smoking cannabis. In a state of "rem rebound'. Having dreams and nightmares and waking up tired. Rem sleep seems worthless

sometimes i go out and pick up litter for fun like one of those niggas you see doing community service, except i'm doing it voluntarily because i'm a better person than you

>>219779548
lost mine to an escort who is almost exactly one year younger than me

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it’s what Jesus would’ve wanted

sometimes I eat cheese before bed so I can have a whacky dream

wondrin

why do u lot ate spurs

>>219779599
should be allowed to dump the clip into him

>>219779572
erm

>>219779616
im sure this is real

>>219779618
haha

>>219779618
got some rotten old brie in the fridge which i nibble on before bedtime

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>dreams and nightmares

>>219779561
rorke accusing Maureen of jestermaxxing

>>219779626
Bizarre

>>219779616
hey i remember reading an old testament story as a young lad where something like this happened. can't remember how it ended, sure it went fine though

>>219779615
you're not a shagger shut up

sucking a 'rnetto

>>219779603
got this to look forward to soon, need to take a t-break

>>219779548
older

my favourite bible is the Schofield bible

>>219779630
>>219779595
Is a bit weird isn't it
I reckon it's why I'm a bit of a mong now

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hes calling me

>>219779616
>Yum yum this poo is delicious

tried going 24 hours without nicotine and it was genuinely harder that quitting opiates. what the fuck lads

>>219779682
you got raped

>>219779616
remoaners who think they're smart for watching QI gobble up slop like this

getting proper into RuneScape again now lads
got way further than I ever did as a kid

business idea: get out of toil forever by committing suicide

weed smokers "look forward" to spending time not smoking weed so that it feels stronger when they smoke weed again

>>219779703
lol im having my second vodka and vimto
:-)

me da once told me: you either die a jester, or live to see yourself become a gooner

>>219779730
OldSchool or 3?
Used to do 3 but quit, sounds like they're overhauling a bunch of systems so I may check it out again.
Did a bit of OldSchool but you can't do much without a membership

What did you do whilst /brit/ was kill

>>219779730
yeah i played OSRS for about 2 months or so and made about 2 years worth of equivalent progress as when i was a kid
think they either made the game less grindy somehow, or i just spent less time fucking around because i no longer engage with the social element

If you goon the jester, you will not be able to continue your quest

can’t be happy for Wrexham because I know 80% of the “fans” there weren’t there before

>>219779488
oh makes sense

>>219779778
DIDN'T wank because /gif/ was down

>>219779674
I've thrown away my bong, I've decided I'm only going to vape cannabis now, and I'm going to try to restrict it to Friday to Sundays, rather than using it all day everyday. This rem rebound bullshit is by far the worst part of the t break, I had no idea this was a thing. The fact that it occurs about two weeks into the t break is the most surprising thing

>>219779788
sick moves

>>219779787
goon jester

>>219779788
rorke psyching himself up to answer the door for his uber eats

>>219779730
Have you tried not being an incel?

>>219779818
s

>>219779788
right this lad is a bit retarded isn’t he

>>219779603
yeah im an alchie and i always wake up at 3am and the rest of the night is dream wrought rem sleep which does me no good. i think it does help your brain to process emotions and thoughts etc. people who dont get any often experience ptsd

>>219779803
i packed in the canjabis some five years ago and it was a good call
i abuse alcohol now, with much more disastrous results but it's socially acceptable, so swings and roundabouts really

>>219779818
ktim ktim ktim

goon jester

>>219779738
Yeah, exactly. I've been drinking alcohol lately as a substitute but it's definitely inferior. This t break has confirmed how much I enjoy cannabis. I'm looking forward to actually getting "stoned", I can barely remember what it feels like

>>219779831
he's a normal man

>>219779848
Incel mong

>>219779788
genuinely does have some moves on him to be fair

The jester is gooned. The game is over.

>>219779789
tinpot mentality. i would love nothing more than for 2 millionaires to buy my club and pump money into it and go on a chelsea or man city like run

quit drinking and smoking years ago and now i just smoke cigs. want to quit those too but goddamn it's hard

>>219779879
throws a better hook than me i reckon

>>219779840
>i think it does help your brain to process emotions and thoughts etc
It just feels like my subconscious is trying to dictate things to me. Forcing me to give a shit about betrayals that I otherwise didn't care too much about. It's a strange sensation, being bossed around by a subconscious that I've suppressed for years

Landlord having people come around the view my room before I move out. Not a fan of people just being able to enter my evil incel lair

she's jestered the goons against us

wish i knew how to dance, reckon i could shag if i learned

Very bizarre day so far all the randos are interacting with me like npcs

wish my iq was naturally low enough that i could enjoy watching 22 men kick a ball about for 90 minutes

>>219779877
I'm not an incel

>>219779788
He's done us

>>219779913
it's the absolute pits, i hated it. always made sure to be out of my flat

what's atomic shrimp playing at with this two hour forty minute video
fucks sake mate

Doing Epstein dances at the club

Prime Minister Jest Ergoon

might switch over to some real estate agent porn

>>219779940
ktim im so intelligent

Only a few months away from owning my flat. No more landlords for the rest of my life.

might get one of them activist canvassing jobs where i go around asking niggas to donate to the perverted arts or whatever

>>219779973
leah gotti's real estate agent scene is legendary as far as i'm concerned

>>219779940
Spoken like a true incel

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Going on a cheeky little walk around my neighbourhood

probably couldn't be a footy ref because I'd kick the ball if it come near me

Chelsea down 1-0 against Wrectum

>>219779891
All fun and games until you get priced out by people not even from the area who didn’t give a shit about the club until now.

I'm guessing those mongs calling me heatherpaedo realised they've got the wrong guy because they've simmered down now. Maybe I need to invent an original name gimmick for myself to stop this from happening ever again

Glad I own a home so I don't have the landlord scum to deal with
Being a tenant dealing with shitty landlords makes me agree with chairman Mao

>>219780010
Donnie Rorko ova here

>>219780040
Shut up incel

>>219780040
dtfic?

as it turns out people don't like it when you start bashing your head against cinder blocks in public

>>219778773
You'll look like a bald, skinny hairless freak instead - class!

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>>219779973
picrel is my go to if im struggling to expel the seed

>>219780040
>Maybe I need to invent an original name gimmick for myself
yeah that's just what we need
another attention seeking pompous twat

>>219780010
Not your 'hood though is it? Looks like ameriheaven

>>219780057
do the fuck I care?

i buy heineken cause its 5% ama

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back hurts
have to work an overtime shift tonight

I don't watch porn

>>219780062
should be realtykings imotbqh

Heaven from all creatures hides the book of Fate,
All but the page prescribed, their present state:
From brutes what men, from men what spirits know:
Or who could suffer being here below?
The lamb thy riot dooms to bleed to-day,
Had he thy reason, would he skip and play?
Pleased to the last, he crops the flowery food,
And licks the hand just raised to shed his blood.

>>219780085
why aren't you buying own-brand voddy?

Don't mind anal in porn but don't think I could look my gf in the eye again if we did anal. It's something reserved for absolute scum

had more crypto in my wallets than i thought, looks like i can get some drugs in this week after all

Moustache has changed everything. Women fawning over me, men approaching while im walking down the road to give me a fist bump and ask how im doing. Whole new world really

>>219780064
Yeah well if it's the only way to prevent the conflation. I don't like it either but some of you are clearly tracking my posts across months and months.

>>219780111
Grim

>>219780133
NEW

>>219779769
OSRS obviously
I've bought a month of membership, smashing out as many quests and Agility training as I can lol

Was going to make the new but I thought I'd let someone else do it this time

poopy

>>219780173
s

>>219780031
the price of greatness. big clubs attract more fans. that's why they're big clubs. if wrexham didn't attract any new fans and stayed a dog shit backwater club the ryans probably would have said fuck this we're not going to continue if theres only 3k people showing up per week.

>>219780108
You don't have a gf incel

>>219780108
Love losing my muck in an elderly chinese prostitute's colon

>>219779818
ktim but only on the off chance it's a woman
98% of the time it's a brown man that barely speaks english and doesn't even look at you

>>219780108
Did anal with the bf earlier