jewbs edition
>>220180146My first gf at uni was Jewish and we still occasionally text
>>220180231she looks like a nice wholesome lass. the kind you settle down with
>>220180146>eyelashes overlap with capAI slop
Never had a gf at uni
a poo is on the cards
>>220180261I managed to get on in the last year, will probably never get one ever again though.
>>220180283How did you do it?
some men are meant to die alone (me)
There was this british woman at my usual lunchtime hangout spot and I thought she was a yank at first the way she talked, only a few words came out weird. She had that white yank woman tone, very grim. Is it common in the UK for women to talk like yanks?
There's nothing like walking into the pub, grabbing a lager beer, bantering it up with everyone behind the counter + appreciating the bloke who's blasting "Champagne Supernova" through his phone.In this small moment, nothing else matters. Today is a good day.
>>220180146>Eyelashes on her cap
>>220180297Through a society, prior to that ever girl I met and liked turned out to have a bf. Eventually found one that didn't, asked her for a coffee and it went from there.
>>220180307common for toddlers who grow up raised by their ipads but not so in adults
>>220180314ahaha alri deanz
bit rude to be 10 degrees today
>>220180307The vocal fry?Yes with insecure middle class womenThey do it to sound more authoritativeMaybe she was just nervous
>>220180307Maybe youre just a mong. Forrens thought i was Australian or American because i don't talk like black londoners.
>>220180307Some people are easily influenced by accents their exposed to, to the point of even talking like a yank despite being British and living in England. My mate moved to Australia years ago and has an Aussie twang now, yet some people move and don't sound any different.
>>220180322gen alpha accent is being moderately yankifiedmy younger sister speaks noticeably differently from me and my older sisterberg
Hate old people who get like 5 lottery tickets at tesco and each one takes fucking 5 minutes to do and then afterwards the old woman in front of me who was huffing and puffing because of how long it was taking proceeds to do the same thing but instead starts a conversation tooI JUST WANT MY FUCKING ZYNSGENOCIDE THE ELDERLY AND THIS PLANET WILL RECOVER WITHIN 50 YEARSTHEY EXIST TO MAKE PEOPLE ANGRY I AM CONVINCED.
>>220180319Ah right. Well done.
>>220180342Not just the fry, she has that rising tone of voice, like every sentence is a question
>>220180319i never had a gf at unii only shagged once in first year then for the rest of uni girls just weren't into me for some reason
What you doing Jennifer my love?
Yeah, my little nephew said 'that is so awesome!' in a pure yank voice when I drew a picture of Spider-Man for him for his birthday (I gave him money too before you lot call me cheap).Not hating on the lad, just remarking.
>>220180365get em off uber eats lad xxx
>>220180375They could tell you were a cretinous incel
>>220180403how can i be an incel if i shagged in first year
>>220180401£3.99 in store and like £5.99 on ubereatsPlus I’d just have to put up with a gormless mirpuri instead
>>220180424If you're not having sex then you're an incel
>>220180365Rogue is much better than zyn. Idk if you have them in the UK but the flavor lasts forever and the bag is more robust.
>>220180400>Not hating on the ladWell maybe you should
how can i increase my izzat to have sexy boob lady?
Just found out my Dad's an incel
>>220180442done me tbf
Alright little johnny, uncle rorke is going to do you a drawing for your birthday, remember to not hurt his feelings and say its great, yeah?
>>220180460I haven't had sex for over 3 years and I'm a virgin again, just how it works innit
>>220180456recite the shahadah and stop eating pork
>>220180445We don’t have them but I only get zyn because I’m quitting cigs anywaySmoking is a losers game you see
>>220180470Guarantee you don't think that applies to women
If you haven't shagged in the past 2 weeks you're an incel
>>220180470haha yeah same, only 3 years haha, definitely hasn't been longer than that
My ultimate problem in life is apathy and low energy. I just eat porridge for every meal (for the last two years) because I don’t care enough to make anything else. I don’t apply for jobs because I don’t care that much. I don’t speak to women because I never leave my flat because there’s nothing to do. I don’t have any friends anymore because I didn’t care enough to keep in touch. Very troubling.
>>220180483If a woman hasn't had sex for over 3 years it's because she's dead
>finally get gf>get her up the duff>baby boy being born>exciting/scary>gf pulls back shawl so i can see my lad>it's a zesty foden face>fml
I remember when I kept swag checking as a teenager and my mum sent me a post that said swag = secretly we are gay and I cried so hard I almost threw up
if you're not shagging right now you're an incel
>>220180503:) nice to pretend isnt it
>>220180298lets die together la. you first hahah
>>220180511I had a GAP shirt my mum got me for Christmas and people I knew from school kept telling me it stood for Gay And Proud and mocking me so much I never wore it again.
>>220180511you: done
>>220180534scream
>>220180511No idea what that means but reckon your mum was right
>>220180534My teacher told me about how we got a GAP hat and wore it to school and his teacher said something to the effect of “well at least we know the hat is right” when he got a question wrong
>>220180534Kek i remember we used to say that
just been press ganged
>smartest anti-communist
>>220180530yh imagining funny make dem brain feel better
informing the burly men working on my front garden that I have no gag reflex
supposed to go a seminar at 3pm but i can't be bothered to go
Actual quote froma BBC drama programme>his 4chan account got deactivated last monthhttps://x.com/willsolfiac/status/2035989541664772390
just been gang pressed
>>220180568Woah i better become communist now or everyone will think im stoopid
>>220180237What's her stance on the genocide?
>>220180565https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4fiJKuWRB4
>>220180574yh imaging katy pon di gherkin mek me brain n penis feel funny x
>>220180534roarwe also used to say swag stood for "secretly we are gay"
>>220180584Already been posted. Kee
>>220180591Which one?
>>220180591We don't talk about politics.
Just had my 4chan account activated lads
Do gay men count as incels since they don't shag fanny?
opened a bag of salt and vinegar crisps upside down one day on the playground and was informed that this means I am gay
yeah i'm not going to click a twitter link I'm afraid
I know
to be fair if you have a pass it kind of functions like an account
Was fat in school and made a joking 'it runs in the family' comment that I can't remember the reason for and then the quietest mate in our group said 'nobody runs in your family' and they all pissed themselves laughing and I never felt more done in my life.
>>220180625The one I remember is, look at your fingernails, if you looked at them with your fingers outstretched it means you're gay.
>>220180601den com de weyte
Didn’t have any friends at school so I didn’t get made fun ofFor example, no one ever called me gay
>>220180623They're volsods, voluntary sodomites.
>>220180607The one killing 15k kids (and counting)
>>220180638he demolished you tbf
>>220180664Guarantee they did
>>220180664same but I had an older brother
>>220180638He's still done you, even now you're still done.
he's right you know
there was the popular group in the year who i sometimes interacted with but wasn't really part oflater found out that one of them died and one was a literal cuck
>>220180638years later you're still seething. he sent you fucking flying mate
>>220180692Denis Pedo
sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but today's chicken and rice toil was tough to get through
>>220180680Not when I was in earshot>>220180683I’m an only childBut it’s nice to speak to someone in a similar situation
any Rorkish goblin in?
>>220180704A boy in the popular sporty group at my school was a cunt and got away with murder went on to be a premier league footballer, but I discovered he died suddenly a few years ago. Won't give more information as I don't want to get doxxed.
keep your pants down if you know whats good for ya
>>220180727>got away with murderkek I missed a bit out, he got away with murder because his mum was a teacher at the school, he didn't literally get away with murder.
I got screamed at by my head of house for patting the dwarf chemistry teacher on the head as he passed me in the corridor when I was in Year 8.
>>220180692Least bloodthirsty republican
>>220180720*raises claw*
Owner of OnlyFans has died.
>>220180727car crash was it
>head of housewhere's the image of that sneering Tarq University Challenge contestant when you need it
never heard of a "head of house" before
>>220180761She hasn't but I'm screaming now that it's an Irish womanhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keily_Blair
in my final year of school we released 3 sheep into the school with 1, 2, and 4 spray painted on them and then when the teachers went to get the sheep out they found all the sheep had put pencils up their nose and slammed their heads on the desk and everyone got an A*
rorke and leftypol being smushed into a ball of clay
>>220180744screamed at you for height mogging that short king
>>220180762Nah a weird accident, shan't say
>>220180761fucking cancer. they should find a cure
>>220180727Geroge Baldock killed someone?
>>220180727Emiliano Sala's the only footballer death I know and he wasn't from here
>>220180769
>>220180769nah he's gonehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leonid_Radvinsky
>>220180772screm
>>220180795>>220180798>Ukrainian jew
>>220180795>>220180798/brit/ must hold a period of mourning over the untimely death of this great porn man
>>220180795Sir Owen Lee-Ferns
Lad got expelled at my school because he brought a knife in (lived in a rough part of town) and the only jewish kid in the year made up this elaborate headcanon that he was a neo nazi who was going to stab him so he snitched on him.
>>220180810we going no-fap today in memory x
>>220180814sc
when I was in school I uhh I don't know what I did cos I forgot it all
Galgool? More like GalGOON.
is this true?
>>220180846What a fucking loser mate
the porn-addicted indian is in
>>220180846how much does this guy pay you to post about him?
For me it's gimmickmaxxing
ScreamingOld man is HALLUCINATING
>>220180832based unpozzed lad
>>220180881is he famous? Just found it online and thought it was interesting
I'm arsedupmyfuckinglifemaxxing
>>220180846nah. going to the pub with mates and drinking beer is probably one of the best things you could be doing to improve your dating chances. your social ability depends on the social experiences you havethat's why rorke struggles, because he didn't have many of those experiences
>>220180895>threaten on friday>TACO on mondaytextbook weekend market manipulation
>>220180895oh my fucking days
>>220180257its clearly a filter but its still funny af
listening to the fall of troy through my new chinese headphones on my new chinese laptop
mood
>>220180298KTIMMERS!!!
>>220180910wtf is TACO?
painfully unfunny threadgrow up
>>220180935fresh new internet meme about le bad orange man
just made myself a pizza, but decided to throw it in the bindieting is hell
>>220180935Trump Always Chickens/Cucks Outhe did it again today over iran
don't reckon computer games had been invented in powell's days really
>>220180959ktim ktim ktim I play video games a lot and I'm a functional alcoholic as well
>@MogTheUrbanite0 (ZERO) chance this man has seen a vagina
rapetoil with the scranstein
>>220180959all these people are just arguing with themselves online its very weird
>>220180959i'm a functional alcoholic AND a gamer. what now?
>>220180971died in 1998
>>220180971Ps1, game boy and n64 were all out in his lifetime
>>220180962just think of the women who will be fawning over you once you lose weight
Please lads be careful what you post, otherwise your 4chan account might get closed down.
>>220180988Posting your views online isnt arguing with yourself
>>220181006thanks lad
>>220181016this isn't something that would even cross your mind unless youre a completely fucked hopeless freak
>>220181014common reasons for accounts being closed: mice, peters
>>220180935Trump Assisting Clinton's Orgasm
>>220180231>>220180256>choker>big hoop earrings>exposed breast>in-style glassesHnnggg definitely settle downer but with some freaky sexual history too
>>220181017It doesn’t get better btw
>>220181017anytime!
>>220181039
>>220181033Braindead are you? Unable to think laterally, to ponder mysteries of the world and have an opinion unprompted? Your life must be miserable
*shoves my tongue down Mousey's throat like what a Facehugger does*
big willy
>>220181054well, I'll just have a shit life and be thin instead of fat then
We shouldn’t post on 4chan. They have disrespected ofcom and the site will soon be banned. If we only move when that day comes /brit/ will die.
>>220181071have sex
>US will hold off on power plant strikes for 5 daysHow embarrassing, he was just banging on about “You have 24 hours until we destroy your biggest power plant!”
>>220181096switched my internet recently making a monthly saving of £7.00 so I can use that money to sign up for mullvad once the ol' chon gets blocked by ISPs
>>220181111grow up
any chads here ever have the EyeToy foe PS2?
>>220181120/pol/ bore waking up at 1:30pm and catching up on the OLDs
>>220181096Sounds like a positive if it means I never have to read your posts again
>>220181140I woke up at 1 actually just had a shower and brushed my teeth
when ofcom bans 4chan where will you spend your free time?
>>220181139my dad's wife's son got knocked out by his cousin when we were playing this when he swung and hit his head
mid albanian tramp with a fridge body corr
policeman outside walking up and down
Timmy's crush
>>220181139Yeah but the only game I could play with it was some shite Nickelodeon party game
we're all moving to the sharty when 4chan gets blocked
>>220181139I had it. it was shit even at the time. I only remember the bubble game
>>220181154brown, brat and flat
>>220181154Dula Peep
what a life!
>>220181185I shan’t beHorrible nasty site
>>220181209whoa, never really thought about it that way...
>my dad's wife's son
>>220181167On 4chan but with a much cooler flag
Three hours and one day until I've got three days holiday
>>220181209bill gate wouldn’t pick it up
>>220181167probably start watching vtubers again and go to holotower
>>220181209god bless the wagies
When 4chan closes we'll just go on KF (the smelly incel version of Tattle Life)
>>220181261corr get in ladnot got any annual leave booked until June, when I have a full week off. My thinking is that if I take time off before then then the weather won't be that nice but in June it should be nice so I can go on some long walks in the sun by myself
Eating seedless watermelon
>>220181286Yeah the weather looks pretty crap this week but I had some holiday to use before I lose it so took my shot
VIC. I'VE FALLEN
>>220181169>>220181183>>220181189when i'm cleaning windows :)
New boss is such a pisstaker it's insane
>>220180905Rorke will forever rage at truth nukes like this
>long walks in the sun by myselfgrim
>you're literally a paedophile who eats mould
>>220181362that's all there is to do when you have no pals no gf
Back from my walk. Lots of sour faced old people about. Matches the barren twiggy trees I suppose
>>220181289slop
>>220181386I'm walking currently and I've seen more dogs than people so that's all good
>>220181397>winblows
>>220180146Im obsessed with planting my r1a seed in her womb
the linux paedophile would like you to know he has seen a picture of the windows operating system
surprise mouthsex
Mad how life is only good for the first 14 years or so (extended to 21 if you're a woman or Chad) and then it's shit unless you take drugs
spend my whole life wanting to regress back to when i was 9 years old and could be blissfully entertained and fulfilled by playing a video game for 12 hours straight and go to bed excited for the next day to play it againnow the only thing that excites me is the thought of getting back on the booze after work to sit there stocious watching short videos
>>220181397>yotsuba bew
where does rorke go or do when he walks?does he just pick a direction and walk?does he ever stop by at a cafe or pub?
>>220181455I'm 35 and can still play video games all dayRarely get the chance of course but it would be mint if I could
>post photo of myself with a swastika hat>everyone seethes>eh y'all obsessed with mewhat are they like lmao
>>220181454oh shut up
>>220181469woods. dark. damp, preferably. alone.
reckon i've got meningitis even though I'm nowhere near kent
>>220181471top 3 games of the last decade go
legs on the rope after 5 sets of squats todaydidn't even do my deadliftsabsolutely forked
Been in a job I hate and that doesn't even pay me a huge amount but it's golden for the CV for three years nowI don't think I can do it much longer
I got a job now whatIt's now comically easy to live, I can eat out whenever, go to the pub on the weekend and save a lot with no planning But a home loan calculator put me at like 60% of a median house
a lot of my social problems in adulthood (friendlessness, virginity etc) stem from lack of socialisation in childhood. When I'm out and about I see kids playing all the time; it seems natural and effortless for kids to play with one another.yet when I was a kid all I wanted to do was hole up in my bedroom and play with my action figures. I'd come up with these elaborate fight scenes with my figures and smash them together, playing out these imaginary fights. Without irony, I did this sort of play for many, many years without issue. If some grotty kid a few years younger who lived 2 doors down wanted me to come out and play I'd rather he fucked off so I could play alone and entertain myselfyet as an adult I can see how socially stunted I am and how I 'should' have spent my youth socialising. So is it my fault for being content with my own imagination as a child (who probably had autism) or is it my parents' fault for leaving me entertain myself rather than forcing me to socialise?
>>220181417>winblows1996 is the year of linux I mean 2006 I mean 2016 I mean 2026
>>220181482clambering into a burrow under a rotten treethen screamingendless screaming
>>220181510Yeah?*walks away and talks to someone who isn't a freak*
>>220181510sorry buddy im making the long lowercase sadposts here would you mind fucking off for an hour and then you can continue
>>220181507yeah i'm a programmer and earn enough to basically do anything.. except buy a housei'm saving 5k a month and it's still not enough for anything other than a suicidebox
>>220181510parents' fault
Every fucking cyber security expert at my company is some fucking Indian cunt who you spend half your day chasing up to do their fucking job. Lazy fucking cunts
>>220181510mumberg should have done a spinning bird kick on you out the window
>>220181510You're just an introvert mate. Don't why everybody in this general seems to think if they're not an extroverted normal chatting with every Tom, Dick and Harry they come across they're a super freak
>>220181548Tell them, not us. Cowardly cunt.
>>220181510neither person's fault it's autism sweaty join a local disability group for socialising
Some people are introverts and get drained in social situations. Some people are extroverts and get drained when they're alone for too long. Get over it.
>>220181563it's not autism, he just had shit lazy parents and probably isn't very good looking
>>220181496Witcher 3 (might be older than 10 years now) Dead Space remake BG3
>long lowercase sadposts
>>220181510>>220181526Actually maybe my initial response was too harsh. My advice is this: stop dwelling on the past. If you want to socialise more then you can do so right now. Find some people in the real world you can socialise with. People with common interests. Whether it's music, movies, books, walking, certain sports, or whatever.
>join a walking group
Feel more drained after my walk than energized. Bet if it were sunny with the trees blooming I would be glowing with energy right now not sinking in my chair like a ghoul. Fucking hate winter weather
monstrosity
>>220181646it's spring mate
>>220181617It's alrigh lad, no hard feelings xbut nah I'm pretty far gone to be fair. I'm a headcase these days. I'll kill myself eventually but there's no immediate need to do so right now.
man nottinghill festival is something else
>>220181583no, everyone feels a need to a socialise but also gets drained from too much socializing eveeeeeeryone
>>220181654Barely. Still got weeks for the actual Spring weather to come in
went for a walk through regents park yesterdayso many good looking young couples my age that i wanted to die
>>220181665on the streets where she belongs
realizing that we might not just get old and might just randomly get cancer or some shit and die
>>220181709>so many good looking young couplesGay
>>220181735not me. im able to see the future you see
>>220181735These days it's easy to assume that you'll probably reach old age because healthcare is pretty good. In the past people would have thought they'd be lucky to get to the age of 40.
I'm immortal
>>220181708sc
>>220181788>In the past people would have thought they'd be lucky to get to the age of 40.Pleasestop repeating thisbullshit
walked out and the catberg was standing in the kitchen sink
>>220181735I'd be OK with being told I had 3-6 months left to live.
prisoners (2013) - 7/10the hunt (2012) - 8/10eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (2002) - 9/10the insider (1999) - 7/10 nobody (2021) - 1/10mystic river (2003) - 8/10the master (2012) - 8/10 noroi (2005) - 6/10the devil's advocate (1997) - 5/10the fugitive (1993) - 6/10eyes wide shut (1999) - 6/10one battle after another (2025) - 6-7/10punch drunk love (2002) - 8/10 rocky (1976) - 8/10weapons (2025) - 7/10spotlight (2015) - 6/10what do i watch next lads
>>220181788dumb fuck stop with this mythancient greeks lived till 70-80 without modern "healthcare" because they weren't fat fucks living on sneed oils and sugarhealthcare just prevents infant mortality
my flatmate just left the flat, came back 2 minutes later, turned the bathroom light on and off, then left again
>>220181863tangled
just learned a uni coursemate of mine recently sold his company and retired earlywe're both 35what have I done with my life
>>220181863memento (2000)
lads sat in their bedrooms talking about their "flatmate" i.e their mum
>>220181870*subscribes to your newsletter*
>>220181863Eternal Sunshine is not better than all those films lmao you little poof
i fr just be leaving hate comments on positive videos on instagram idc
>>220181863seven (1995)also memento (2000) like that other anon said is quality
>>220181925it gave me some joy in my fucked up incel rapelife>>220181899was actually gonna watch that the other night god call>>220181887the animated one?
>>220181863if you're enjoying paul thomas anderson films there will be blood is his best
>>220181925I was gonna give him a sincere film rec but the ratings put me off. Just some terrible opinions in there that made me feel confident in deciding that my good recommendations would be wasted on him.
>>220181939ktimlove ruining a good atmosphere with incellish hateful vitriol
>>220181925we all like different things that's what makes life beautiful x
>>220181892>what have I done with my lifeI dunno, what?
>>220181892So he's a NEET now?
we should colonize anatolia
left my mums house 6 years ago but I’m still on the family sim plan
being english feels like being old an older man who's done everything and doesn't have anything to provewe already conquered the world, so when i see posts like this >>220182020 it's like listening to a kid talk about how he's gonna fuck another kid up
We're all born and die as NEETs. Remember that.
>>220181417>>220181458we all like different things that's what makes life beautiful xx
>>220181863no country for old menfargoblood simplehell or high waterThe Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Fordunbreakable
>>220182030reminded me I need to wash my red trousers
>>220182046you're not dead yet. come with me
>HS2 trains could run slower than planned to save money
socially stunted cretin, me
speed 2
>>220182046retired top of the game with an unmatched recordit should be feet up time
>>220182075what is the point of it all lol
"Socially stunted" just means ugly
>>220182105the vantablack bill
>>220182105read up on this, matehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autism
>>220182123looks like woke nonsense
"your skirt is too short"don't worry you are too king
bad day at the gym. cut it short
just wish I wasn't so cringe irl
>>220182139
>>220182159did you get pooed on and raped
>>220182171weird thing to imagine happening
>>220182140*Rapes you*
