THINKING ABOUT THE LOVELY FUCKING CANS edish
Stop posting this pure angel on this cursed board
>>221297032he's not making a beef wellington lad the freshness isn't of concern to him
haha this is me
Zack Polanski pretended to smoke crack cocaine in prison for a role in the 2011 film Bashment
>>221297048Correct. My girlfriend is white British, what now?
>>221297075>Zack PolanskiDeport.
it has been 41 days since my last drink
Anyone excited?
DTFIC has a Chinese gf omds
wife and l have different coloured eyes so l will accept our children depending how they come out
>>221297075crack cocaine is smoked out of a thin pipe, not foilheroin is smoked on foil
>>221297032Dried mushrooms are the superior product because they're more reliable and have a longer shelf life.
>>221297110desperate to fit in chinese
>>221297117Drugs, such as heroin and crack cocaine, can be smoked by inhaling the smoke produced by heating the drug on a piece of aluminium foil.
>>221297106almost as if ramping up the prices of everything by like 400% "just because lol" has put people off going
>>221297079Uhh umm *shuffling notes* have you ever shagged her up the arse?
>>221297106funny how many calls there were to have the russia and qatar world cups boycotted and its the yank one that'll be the disaster
>>221297106I mean I'm not counting down the days or anything but I'm excited to shitpost on /sp/. Generally it takes a bit of time to gather momentum once the event is underway, it's like that with the olympics too. At the start you think I dunno if I can be arsed with this but by the end the threads are fully up and running and everyone is gassed up.
>>221297106not remotely
>>221297106They should honestly just hold the World Cup in Europe and South America. Anywhere else it’s utterly soulless.
Sir Zack Polanski
mate has a Filipino gf and she's sorta cute but it's just not the same is it, if we're honest
i dont have a gf or any pals for that matter
>>221297121you're a fucking dry mushroomvirge
>>221297121they lose potency. the high is completely different to fresh shrooms.
>>221297176KTIM!!!
>>221297161A China world cup would be kino
>>221297106>get the marked up game ticket>get the marked up plane ticket >get the marked up hotel room>get on the marked up "public transport">buy the marked up food and drinkAll for England to go out in the first round
>>221297151I have!
alcohol shopping toil done now time to get FUCKED UP BITCHES
love it when bergs do their little chirps or mrrows x
reckon many blokes get an oriental gf because they think that she'll think your knob is big
>>221297221>>221297221>>221297221
>leftypol works in first world sweden for a yearWow the work and culture is so different there,>Leftypol on hordes of barely literate people with no cultural link to Britain or even europeThey'll be fine dont be racist rorke
>>221297169I can see how they’re alright to look at but they’re just too insectoid it’s not like having a gf it’s like having an overgrown praying mantis (a fit one) living with you
>>221297176we are your pals
last WC was 100% rigged for the argieswonder who the rig is in for this time
>>221297106who can even afford this, surely not only the millionaires and billionaires?
are people really still buying android chinoid plastic slop phones lmfao nigga ive got an iphone SE from 2020 and its been flawless from day one
>>221297117>>221297137lmfao shagged FIRMLY up the arse with this one
Voting for the National Rebirth Party
bare tummy or clothed breastwhich would you rather touch?>>221297222recon its cos they literally canget any other type
>>221297223
>>221297223?
>>221297223radically early
>>221297222oriental prostitutes always say i have a massive knobwhite prozzers don'tits 6 inches hard
>>221297179Rude and uncalled for desu >>221297182No they don't and no it isn't. It's the same psilocybin fresh or dry.
>>221297223are you out of your FUCKING MIND MAN??????????
>>221297256fodyeg
>>221297263Got a 6.6 incher, meOne white escort I saw said it's big
>>221297275yeah it was a bit rude and out of pocket I apologise x
>>221297239England i hope
>>221297223Based earlynewgod
>>221297285anotehr diego gimmick used against himlol lmao even
>>221297280 actually thought it was at 310 for some reason think im going insane
wearing my smelly unwashed cigarette hoodie with burns and holes all over it
>>221297293lol no
>>221297255Was thinking about heritage party but they want to reopen coal mines and coal power stations which sounds a bit mental desu
>>221297305>himfodyeg
I voted green so all my cousins can come and claim bennies
How many escorts have you snagged, lads?5 for me
>>221297327never ahd a gf never had sext. late 30s
>>221297318Scotland and Donald can build as many golf resorts as he likes
>>221297326they can already do that>>221297327none I've never had sex or touched a boob
>>221297327never paid for sex but I have shagged 80 women
>anotehr
>>221297360u cant seriosuly think anyone will believe that when youre;' posting here at 1.30pm on a thursday
>>221297360Doubt
>>221297379it is true, I’m WFH and bored, haven’t been here in a few months
>>2212972886-7 is the sort of grey area where girth really determines whether you're "big" or not
Did one of those poos where it feels like your bunghole has come loose.
>>221297401"sure"
Shagged 81 women and some even insisted on paying me for the experience.
>>221297360Immoral
he typed one letter faster than the other by mistakeget him!!!!!
canvassers at the doortold them to bloody do one!
>>221297421Look i dont make the rules it just has to be done. How else will they learn?
>>221297421screamthey really think they're so "clever"most reddit shit on the planet
Anyone ever played LA Noire in black and white? Third playthrough I’m thinking of doing it
the greens will never be voted in and I don't know why the media is pretending anyone cares about them
my stats (never paid for sex):2 women shagged1 woman i put me willard in but went soft but I count it if im asked by the lads (but her and i were agreed we didnt shag really)5 women i couldn't get hard with
rorke won't like this, but /brit/ has a lot of diversity. it's probably the most diverse thread on the board
>>221297433*pops you in a canvas bag and throws you into the canal *
leave a stunna where you aint never shot any queerfaggot with a drug habit
>>221297442They're led by a jew
Sir Keir Starmer is the most unfairly victimised and scapegoated prime minister in British history.
going to put a za in the ven
I'm normally nice but I'm not nice to door to door salesfolke (including witnessers) or those people at shopping centres who hold pamphlets at you
>>221297439Seems like being a whiny bitch is more reddit
my stats (never paid for sex):0 women shagged3 girls put my cock in their mouth (but never came)idk how many like a dozen have grasbbed my cock for a sustained period of time (never came tho)eaten one girl out (she never came)semi fingered another 3 girls (they never came)so in sum 0 sex0 dates0 gfs eversucks to be me
>>221297442Voted labour for mayor to avoid them getting in (Hackney) but I reckon they're going to underperform Gave the reform candidate a pity vote
>>221297470Boris was sacked because he served cake to his staff
>>221297450My stats (also never paid)2 women shagged1 tranny shagged
>>221297106superspreader event
landlord just sent me a voice message where he said nothing and was just banging around. why can't boomers use simple pieces of technology?
> But speaking to broadcasters on Tuesday, he said the £5,000,000 gift was "purely private" and "wasn't political in any sense at all".LOL.
belong in a zoo, me
>>221297450Counts for more than all escort lads experiences combined
>>221297485agreed thats why it's grim they do it
>>221297506Sneethe
hantavirus down my japs eye
>>221297495good lad keep the ratio in favour of real women or its a bit gay
>>221297503its his privilege as a landed elite to waste your time
Reform will just become the new Tory party and will govern exactly the same.
my stats:
>>221297494He wasn't sacked, the country and his own party lost all confidence and trust in him. Shut it rorke.
>>221297514Thats just banter mate dont take it so hard. Are you dyslexic?
The stats:80 women shaggedProbably spunked in 60 of themKissed countlessLots of girls I did stuff with but didn’t get the willy in
>>221297540pot kettle
bought Penguins on my biscuit trip to the shops. anyone wanna hear the jokes?
Bantuvirus
weight loss fad idea: medically-induced coma for 1-2 months with tube feeding
Pic from the Reform HQ meeting
>>221297552yeahx
Wasn't even a funny typo but some people here look for any excuse to make a post.
>>221297544least sexually successful 24/7 brit poster
>>221297555scr
>>221297552no
hooting
>>221297544slut
>>221297558trapped in the fatty coma with your imagined future daughter sending you subliminal messages to wake up on coma/brit/
white people be like white people be like but they be the white people that be like
>>221297561bet it feels so good to be a shitskin and just mill about in the street all day every day for your entire life
i do sometimes dream about posting here
Well that's the downstairs of the grotty council house hoovered
It's actually insane how incompetent Russia is.
>>221297606no you dont be quiet
>>221297564>Why can't penguins play football?Because there's snowball>Why are penguins good racing car drivers?Because they're always in pole position!
how embarrassing
What do we think lads is Rupert Lowe gonna do it?
>>221297627
>>221297241There's loads of Yanks who can afford it but I think it'll be mostly corporate holders idk
rorke fighting against the restraints and digging them into his skin so he has to be medically examined fucking rorke
>>221297616first read this as rosalia and almost went perplectic but then i realised i made a mistake and calmed down
>>221297606ever get the nightmare you've been doxxed?
>>221297627pskrmn
>>221297616starting to think it's not possible to win wars anymore without using nukeswhen was the last time a major power fought a war and won a decisive victory without nukes
>>221297643Mate people know where I work and nothing has ever happened. People here are all bark no bite
>>221297643Nathan has
>>221297633did a big jobby in his boxers for nothing
Those little niggas are hungry!
>>221297651yanks bodied saddam pretty well
za and rlic ed in the ven
>>221297653Probably because nobody in Brit wants to go to shitsbury
>>221297633Reckon we should just round up people called warren, darren, shane etc and grind them into dog food
>>221297660Birb
We love the Pugh, don't we folks?
>>221297633Imagine it would’ve been a bit suspicious when they seen him with poo all on his fingers and hands
>>221297653And you're all cock and no life
>>221297660im the calm collected stonefaced sigma baby on the left
>>221297653might be because you’re a made up character mate
>>221297681pickme Pugh is fooling no one
>>221297660Wait till magpieberg sticks his big beak in there
>>221297675Shrewsbury is probably one of the nicest towns in the UK
>>221297681nah she went woke
>>221297666oh now we didn't do all the work lad
>>221297699Your existence there contradicts that
recreating 9/11 in kerbal space program
>>221297717done him
they can keep upping the price of meat it doesn’t matter I don’t care how poor I am I will never eat that fake plant based meat shit never ever
>>221297717that's him done for the day
>>221297681Had sex with an escort who looked like Florence PughSwallowed my cum as wellShit was goated
should've been kicked out of the nest me
>>221297724Her*Lad, Mr. Spaino is a woman and I'd actually respect his choice of pronouns I were you
>>221297724>>221297735I'm not a "him", I'm a woman and should be referred to with she/her pronouns
>>221297731you vvill
you won't believe what comes out of me when I get homecan't risk doing it at toilI might have to take a shower aftertype of poo that makes a lesser man gay
scrimpling oot me arse
what was the deal with nickelodeon in the 90s and 00s and their fixation on dumping green slime on people?
>>221297761Dont know not a yank so watched british kids tv
>>221297761it was so the pedophile execs could greenscreen it to look like cum
>>221297761dan schneiders twisted machinations
yoo this Binding of Isaac gameplay is fire (i am standing still waiting for health to regen and probably will do the same for the next 30 minutes)
>>221297761read it on tik tok that it's easier to CGI it to make it look like cum
>>221297746Fair play, Mr. Spaino. I will always stand by you, your masculine body, your masculine face and of course, your masculine pronouns>>221297761>>221297776Not quiteIt was done as a psedu wet t-shirt contest
>I'm a woman
>>221297761in britland they call it "gunge"foul people
>>221297778fr never understood why people like that game so much
Can't watch anime or play video games during the day. Has to be in the evening after everything else is done then I feel like I can finally relax
>>221297795i love it, im just doing very boring strats to min/max for no reason
I went into EW’s Aldi, bought myself a bar of Moser Roth chocolate and a bag of gummy worms and she served me on the till. Thought about telling her I had come just to see her but she seemed really shy and sweet irl and I didn’t want to creep her out haha
>>221297794aint no way
Is amusing how close me and Spaino are geographically. He's literally an hour or so up the road. Shrewsbury to Chester.
>>221297802Mr. Spaino, lad, what does your day look like? Surely, a masculine shemale manly woman like yourself must have all sorts of adventures?
dadberg found the fart porn stash
>>221297814Believable story
My gf went one further and voted for restore in her area. Absolutely based
sticking my finger up my hole
>>221297836omg le heckin based goth girl reform gamer girl with gozonka zonkasheckin le anime is real for le epic sauce
>>221297822Ever shagged him up the arse?
>>221297822Its race day today no chance of visiting
>>221297852
>>221297852raped that imbecilic twerp
>>221297802nightmare when there's some shit on later in the day like a dentist appointment or phonecall or whatever and you can't relax until it's been and gonegive me a 09:00 appointment over 16:15 any day
autistic dollhouse hour is it
>>221297827Fuck off cunt you're in a mobility scooter and have a specially adjusted toilet because you're so fat and you wear a sleep apnoea mask in case you die in your sleep you fat disabled cunt
>>221297852You're brown
>>221297544Alright then. Let's get a breakdown by age then (your age).
>>221297852raped that cunt in half
>>221297852csrim
high T post
>>221297876
anything good to watch on youtube?
>>221297855I met him once >>221297859Yeah I'm watching it now>>221297872Used to be like this but I actually prefer evenings at ALDI. Since I'm quite a nocturnal person I prefer staying up watching anime or gaming and wake up in the afternoon, get ready and leave for work.But yes I do hate waiting around for appointments and things like that.
>>221297906no it's all Mr Beastified
What happened to Peloton, used to advertised all the time
opinions on TND?
>>221297876Not very ladylike now is it?
>>221297852u absolute neek mate replying to urself aswell omdz
>>221297916https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=peloton
>>221297906Just are Richard IV
>>221297917Seems like a creep and has bad taste in music
rorke aged 31 logging into his roman statue laser eyes blue check twitter account to post ai generated anime porn of that amelia cartoon girl
>>221297919Ah, Mr. Spaino can be as masculine as he likes. Sure after all, it's not the willy, the body hair, the facial hair, the manly voice, the manly shoulders, the lack of tits, the lack of a vagina or even the lack of a actually being a woman that makes a woman now, is it?
>>221297929Spoon feed me more mummy
>>221297926silence, you've been done
>>221297909Why would you meet up with a notorious sex pest
>>221297960Haven't met up with cansnonce or piehead
I'm convinced they've changed something on youtube it's just all drivel noweven when I reload the front page, same drivel. There needs to be a randomiser button. One that actually works, not that "New To You" tab which does fuck all and shows me the same shite
>>221297909>>221297960Think he means that he looked in the mirror
>>221297722I'm too dumb and lazy to play Kerbal the way I'd like toI wanna establishes bases on planets and built system wide orbital comms but I don't fuck with all the math and automation stuff so I've only made it as far as landing a Kerbal on the mun and successfully returing him which I could only do with aggressive and tedious savescumming because I was doing everything manually and going by eye
bro is washed tf out
>>221297970consequences of every tech company on the planet being flooded with indians
>>221297957you couldn’t do a rolly polly you little loser
>>221297983grow up
got observe and report on
>>221297991got the whole squad laughing
Crush the turd world
Spainooooooooooo
>>221297970I think the search bar has hidden functionality but I forgot how to use it.
smashing up gnats in a mortar and pestle
no… it can’t be
>>221298028no you arent be quiet
Canslad here with an update, lads.My 24/7 carer just took in the post, my new female Judge Dredd costume has arrived.I, like Spaino, can pretend to be a woman
any mention of having a gf and Nathan flys off the handle, curious
might visit the nursing home and play bingo with the old geezers
>>221298039how is your mind this obliterated by him
>>221298038yes i am your moronic idiot
>>221298053they should call it ningo
>>221298062Because this post made me fucking laugh so badly on a meeting I got asked by one of the toilcunts I work with if I was okay>>221297876
>>221298068>moronicFOY
Test
>>221298034>Gary barlow?!>no its barrie barlow>Oh ok lets just run with it anyway
doing an amazon order, you want any cheap shite?
>>221298077you really need to kill yourself
never really "got" any of the /brit/ characters. give me shippy, poley, HHL, ebin, SCEA, edgbaston, SHOUTANON and TSL any day of the week over weak crap like "Mousey", "Spainlad" or "Escortmong".
>>221298083no
>>221298084Not until I become a woman like the masculine manly Spaino
>>221298095mmkay
shut the fucking of your moronic hell up XD
rorke getting his starfish munched by a 50 year old pub slug and moaning like a bitch
>>221298095go back
>>221298083get me one of those laser pointers with which i can torment catberg
>>221298083Dont use it x find it to be a malign influence and presence
just farted and it smelled like dry cat food. wat dat mean
Managerstein here, when doing the rota for today gave all the reform voting lads the day off, booked the lads i suspect to be leftypol in for 14 hour shifts
>>221297106US is a Hitlerian society. Nobody wants to pay £10k for tickets, travel, accommodation, etc etc only to face the gamble of being put in an ICE concentration camp black site.
>>221298129switch to wet cat food
they say honey doesn't expire but I've got some fucked looking years old honey in the cupboardCould just be crystallisedI don't really want to chance but but fuck me I could go some honey right now
>>221298143sc
leftypol gettin he nails did
>>221298146just put the jar in warm water for a bit
Imagine the absolute state of this board. We’ve got Spaino having a mental breakdown over pronouns, Rorke getting his starfish munched by a pub slug, and the rest of you virgins counting how many times a woman touched your knob for more than three seconds. Absolute mental health crisis. I’m voting Reform just to see if they’ll finally deport the lot of you to a fucking sunless island where the only thing to eat is dry cat food and mushroom dust. Bunch of absolute bellends. Sack the lot of you off.
I'm disabled
Love it when my enemies make a simple spelling mistake because it means I'm free to disregard their entire argument and claim victory
rorke wiping his monster munch fingers on his primark shirt
>Rorke getting his starfish munched by a pub slugWhat does this mean
>>221298174
>>221298142this is a good thing though
bunnings 6 nugget meal
catbergs just stinked up the whole house with a mega poo in the litterbox horrible fat boy
Leftypol turning his bed to face mecca
>>221298187Take your bets, did this post come from Tel Aviv or MI5?
>>221298187goodest goy award
Plotting a third cup of coffee >>221298174Ktim
b
>>221298193shut up hitleryank
the whole threas reads like indian ESLs trying to roleplay what they think brits talk about
>>221298185getting his bumhole licked by a mouth that has been coarsened by thousands of cigarettes
eaten 2 cherry bakewell tarts today
if you’re not a phone poster only you seriously need to grow up
Just saw the worst post of all time
>>221298214Don’t do it you madman
half a za and some garlic bread down the hatch
>>221298249phone makes me do 1 million capchas
>>221298216omdz
>>221298242It 2x lush
you could suck a golf ball
>>221298185Think he meant slag
>>221298216genuinely the worst /brit/ post ever made
mrrowsx
>>221297074this actually looks a bit like my uncle
eating flapjack with a tall glass of ice cold Jersey milk, wearing a thick knitted cashmere jumper and I've got the heating on
Become Orthodox
>>221298295then what?
no one gives a shit about what you're eating
favourite beer
>>221298307dunno
>>221298295Completely alien to the british isles and in a language and culture that never existed here. Hm don't think so
>>221298295>Abandon reality to worship jewsNo, tyvm
>>221298327>>221298327>>221298327
>>221298334 new
>>221297778placenta was such a dogshit itemshould have been reworkedi always rerolled if i could
