first for second chances

hello (i am british)

adults who drink actual glasses of milk are exclusively freaks and perverts

>>221673394
it lush with oreos x

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can't eat crisp sandwiches anymore
you know why

Something very bad has happened team

Covering my naked body in slugs like a vile freak. Hbu?

>>221673411
woke

>>221673411
not allowed in starmers britain

just saw a very visibly autistic fella on a date with decent looking girl which sounded like it was going well at the pub
asking questions about what the fuck im doing with my life

Don't reply to him

>>221673412
shonen anime villain of the week ahh blud

>>221673410
FOY

Excellent.

>>221673417
you got banged up for eating crisp sandwiches

>>221673417
elaborate

>>221673427
say more

from birth up until age 25 you grow up
from then on society grows up around you

>>221673452
x

Where you been buying Ritalin from lad? been using torzon but it's a fucking slog waiting for some dutch parcel that's doesn't every 1 in 5 times

>>221673417
What's happened my dear friend, Miss Employed Woman?

>>221673452
Ugly

>was walking to the shops a few months ago and some guys getting high in a parked car i walked past shouted "harry potter"
>don't wear glasses outside anymore. they did me good and proper

Bear

get the new geororke watched

>>221673417
does it involve your willard?

Mental how some people are just visibly Irish

>>221673452
beautiful lady

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>>221673466
shut it stinky

Bye.

>>221673476
hey that was a story for the old. don't tell the new my business

>>221673481
didn't he say summat in favour of Reform and reddit has had the pitchforks out for him for months now?

Who knew being an autismo on geolayers would attract such a leftypol audience
bizarre

hitler used to have sausages for dinner. didn't do them in an air friar though

>>221673502
based shagger rorke. leftypol seething

>>221673439
never had a burger than have you? silly mong

ordered some wine

Rorke sees a single alt fashion hapa teenager and loses his marbles for months afterwards

>>221673502
it changed him.

>>221673490
it's a Celtic thing desu
"Black Irish" look very similar to Swarthy Welsh
Whilst the more typical Irish look is indistinguishable from Scots.

might offer my tight little incel bum to peter theil to secure my space in his new zealand bunker

>>221673502
rorke's everything changing
theftypol seething

it altered him significantly

>>221673515
No he fucking didn't. He was famously a vegetarian, mongo.

would shoot in seconds if that controller went up my arse

need to see alysa liu taking bwc

>>221673546
youre famously a faggot

>>221673476
and what made it worse was that on the way back they got out of the car and chased me down to steal my trousers. still remember trying to crawl away when they were pulling my trouser leg but I couldn't see anything since they took my glasses too

Rorke's reaction to black pussy will be chronicled in history for all time

>>221673512
don't really know just like him i mean his videos

>>221673559
I accept your concession

>>221673578
you accept cocks in your arse

I am full Irish R1b.

>>221673515
Quorn sausages mayhaps
Hitler was a leftypol vegan

>>221673457
not much more to add, just made me wonder what direction my life is going
i cant keep coming back to my flat alone when fellas like that are going out there and getting it
no harm to him but if he can do i have no excuse
granted i havent exactly put myself out there, thats the bit im struggling with due to fears of rejection

>>221673564
BPCR

Vaginas are pretty gross and disgusting when you think about it logically

>>221673562
this is the second video i've seen today from this filthy water park with barely functional waterslides

>>221673588
done him

>>221673558
please stop mentioning this hideous freak, makes me so sick thinking of her piss yellow teeth and malignant hairy pang pang moles hanging off her face. it's also upsetting to see how pathetic most men are lusting over this hebretic bioweapon

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>>221673564

gen z are trying to cancel jarl balgruuf

>>221673583
oh yeah I like this
very cute

>>221673618
NO

>>221673583
ummy

>ai sloppified a picture of the local black girl employee (finest ass I’ve ever seen) at Lowe’s to avoid doxing.
You lads ever do this?

>>221673583
that's me (the umbunny)
i am the umbunny

>>221673605
sup mouldie

>>221673618
who?

>>221673618
trying to import smelly khajiiits cos muh economy and goods

Say what you want leftypol. My ancestors are waiting for me in Sovngarde.

>>221673563
and as i was flailing around trying to see i felt something press against my lips and i opened instinctively and it turned out one of them had pooed directly into his hand and then forced his steaming log into my mouth

>>221673638
is your belly button an innie or outie

>>221673605
ok sorry

>>221673583
Would love to wring that cunt's neck and make stew from it

>>221673644
why is he mouldie

>>221673598
I like pussois
I like watching them flap around while I'm doing a bird up her shitter

Rorke is just angry and needs to heal himself

ate too many sweeties. probably going to have a really watery poo soon

i-im from rorkestead >_<

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arse

>>221673654
glasses wearers never win

Imagine, for a moment, being a woman.

im having that poo now

>>221673673
fat tramp

>>221673394
ktim

might get on the skyrim
any skyrim mods that let me have a son or daughter as a follower so I can adventure with my kid

>>221673665
you make stews from soft toys?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QE6JRh6-AQ

Are you all under 30 here?

>>221673716
I'm 32

>>221673701
nah mate the little rabbit on the right

Remember on Reddit someone talking about how their wife got arrested by British police for having Skyrim with a porn mod that let you fuck dragons, werewolves, bears, etc

err

>>221673716
...
yh...

>>221673719
RIGHT THEN

>>221673716
im actually 34 but people say i look in my 20s

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>>221673690
Life on easy mode

that poor speccy lad

>>221673690
i'd hate it

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>>221673733

>>221673725
heard he voted for the green party actually

Prefer innie fannies but a lot of women say that's noncey

not sure you can post that

Might start seeking God

>>221673727
didn't happen but if it did the police should have executed her and him

>>221673732
They're being polite because you're ugly and immature xx

>>221673716
yeah, im 22 and 5 months. im also going to bed now

>>221673719
they wee all over those flaps (and their inside leg)

>>221673716
am 37 (and a model) but i look 17

1-0 Villa lads

>>221673616
i love the last one where he's pretending he hasn't seen her for ages

speccy bam in shambles

>>221673772
this is hot

>>221673780
english clean sweep of europe starts here

https://vocaroo.com/1m6TFp16PDQ8

>>221673716
I am 35 years young and not even close to peaking

>>221673780
Spurs are still the current holders

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>>221673732

europa league means nothing if freiburg are in the final

I'm a businessman

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8XAOMeWdqY

why does jewtube demand a phone number now?
"to keep your account safe" you're not a fucking bank

Must be exhausting being angry and hateful all the time

>>221673811
He looks 63

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beaut of a goal tbf

pepsi in the ninja slushi machine came out nice and yummy

remember being at school and I didnt tell anyone my mum had died and then somehow everyone found out and i remember going in to school that day everyone was just weird around me and nobody said anything about it and still til this day 11 years later theres never been any open acknowledgement of or reference to the fact that my mother is dead between me and my best friend who I speak to every day

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why do they want to fry the bergs anyway

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>>221673751
There's an American tranny who films himself hanging out inside of the women's restroom at public places. He loves kids too!

>>221673844
back of the net

>>221673792
yes

Well, Richard Ashcroft has regained the rights to music. Congratulations, Richard.

still time for a few more (you)s before bed I reckon

>>221673417
aldi sacked you off

>>221673860
i think a lot of them do this

>>221673858
did he go to her funeral?

>>221673860
Yes and you're a young earther neonazi schizo so I don't really care

sir final solution

These captchas are getting out bloody hand. Is all of this REALLY necessary in order to prevent bots? If that's true, it will only lead to more and more enshittification of the user experience. The dead internet theory is real and I'm tired of pretending it's not. Time to log off and go outside. One less yank in these threads.

>>221673865
after all these years it must feel bittersweet

do other generals talk at length about poo and have their own versions of poo screaming?

Geowizard is a racist
You are A BAD MAN
A not nice person
TOM

>>221673865
look how identical it sounds to bittersweet symphony lmao
Ashcroft is a fraud. A FRAUD!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xp2VcS1WSvE

>>221673464
just tell the doctor your kid is hyperactive

>>221673844
reckon the red one could've stopped it if he wasn't scared of it

>>221673891
they also added a 4mb file limit lol

>>221673844
foot like a traction engine

>>221673453
>>221673465
Got let go from Aldi for trying to kill myself at work again.

>>221673417
Fanny plumbing in delayed again?

>>221673865
damn he gets to own all the music? that doesnt seem fair. does that mean he can sue me for humming a wee tune to myself?

>>221673898
When I used to frequent norgetraaden a few years ago they had a weird wheelchair girlfriend gimmick where they're lust over women in wheelchairs and say they want one as a gf

Sir John McGinn GBE

>>221673811
17 year old with a prodigious meth addiction

>>221673502
god forbid a white boy get a little motion

THAT'S NOT THE REAL SACKED TRANNY

>>221673901
Can't believe the no roads birmingham video was 3 years ago

getting better feedback from AI than from an actual therapist

2-0 Villa lads

>>221673885
It's probably a thrill seeking fetish to go into women's private spaces as straight men and film them.
>>221673888
Why are there so many trannies made from this site?

don't blame women for being gold diggers. My mother was not a gold digger. She had me with a schizo guy on decent money but then left him only a few years after I was born. Then she got with a guy who hasn't had a payrolled job since the late 80s. Her not being a gold digger ruined our lives. I hate being poor. I hate that I spent my childhood moving between rented apartments time and time again. I hate that we can barely pay our mortgage now. I hate that I can't NEET without feeling guilty, or that I have to pay all of my meagre gibs to support mortage so I literally never have any money.
>just be a wageslave bro
All the entry level jobs are done by jeets or 19 year olds that companies can pay nothing. I am pushing 30, am mentally ill, and have nothing to offer. Even if I get hired, I will likely fuck it up. If I was in a financially secure family, maybe I would focus on building a skill like coding and spending time getting a decent job, but when you are living hand to mouth and in constant fight or flight mode, it is impossible to get good at anything.

If my mother had been a gold digger, I'd be living in a big house, not a shitty apartment. I'd not feel guilty NEETing. I'd have time and energy to study for something actually decent. I could enjoy my gibs for myself. I wouldn't feel in a constant state of depression and self hate and anxiety. My mother hates her life, I hate my life. I can do nothing to help because I am a mentally ill, poverty stricken, useless charity case. Women who get with rich guys are smart, they are using their pussy card to have a decent life. They are also securing a better future for their child. If you were not born into poverty, you will never understand the pain. I don't care if you are a KHHV ugly incel (like I am too btw). Poverty is worse. I'd rather be a financially stable incel than a slayer poorfag. Unfortunately, I have the worst of both worlds anyway.

Anyway, I got through today without slitting my wrists, so thats good.

What's the worst thing you ever did in your life lads?

>>221673891
the captchas get extremely easy if you do them for a week on the same IP.
it's less to do with bots and more to make ban evading a gigantic pain

remember mum died in front of daughter after head got stuck in rocks when tide was rising

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>>221673949

>>221673937
nvm they're still posting it to this day

https://desuarchive.org/int/thread/220512396/#220527973

>>221673955
You're an American who spends all day on /brit/ posting far right political slop and lying about trannies
Get a life

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PtEozTFtfF0

>>221673967
had sex with my sister

>>221673699
You can adopt children in the vanilla game with a DLC iirc. But, there are probably mods for that sort of thing 'cause vanilla is a bit shit

>>221673973
haha yeah classic

>>221673967
I killed Enzo Ferrari

Aston Villarse

>>221673987
>https://desuarchive.org/int/thread/220512396/#220527973
scr

>>221673995
did you cum?

>>221673949
You're on the right track! That's not just an idea — It's a revelation! I understand why you're thinking the way you're thinking and you're so right for it but don't forget you're pretty great too.

>>221673967
mum told me to put something in the microwave for a minute, I only put it in for 59 seconds

I DONT WANT TO LIVE IN MY NEWLY PURCHASED FIRST HOME ON A BUSY MAIN ROAD ANYMORE

I WANT TO LIVE BACK WHERE I RENTED BUT ITS TOO EXPENSIVE

IM TRAPPED HERE FOREVER

>>221673989
Name these lies then. You can't.

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>>221673967
When I was 8 I encouraged my little brother to throw a kitten down a flight of stairs so I could catch it
The kitten had no damage but she literally shat herself out of fear and was shaking.
Never did it again but I still feel extremely guilty about that.

any bedtime storyteller man in? cant seem to fall asleep

a black swan event

wanking to ai images of dua lipa being fucked by horses again lol

>>221673753
women say it's noncey if you like anyone under 35

and then they obsessively shave every part of their body

go figure

>>221674061
not very pineapple chimp

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mad how these cunts have got a reputation for being sexy casanovas

utter FRAUDS

I want to live as an honest man, to get all I deserve and to give all I can. And to love a young woman who I don't understand.

>>221674061
you're such a slut for her omg

>>221674032
pooing and screaming!!!!

like women who are boyish but don't take pride in being boyish. rare species.

>>221674047
pussy. I would have sparked it at the wall a couple of times

I want to wank. to naked ladies

>>221674052
once upon a time, somebody started their story with "once upon a time" and then everyone started doing the same. Now we don't even know the origin of the saying unless you do some nerd research which nobody wants to do.
The end.

>>221674082
Pep must pay

>>221674012
no
we stopped after a few minutes once we decided that it was a bad idea

>>221674104
screech

>>221673966
>Anyway, I got through today without slitting my wrists, so thats good.
me too

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This one said that executing child molestors is transphobic LMAO. He's saying the two are linked together?

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I must say, the feet on podcast girl leaves something to be desired. She's a proper dish, proper peng and that don't get me wrong, but those trotters are a problem. Way too boney for me, not to mention the harsh angles in the shape of the foot.

>>221674082
i mean where are they counting from, just a bit of a receding hairline?

me? deserve nought but death but i intend to go on living

>>221674082
no, italy does

Fuck. Maybe it will be ok.
I'm building equity. The house value will increase. As long as I get an inheritance I can probably buy a house where I used to rent.

>>221674113
horrible little man

Might watch the thing

Big Kahuna Burger! That's that Hawaiian burger joint, I heard they got some tasty burgers. I ain't ever had one myself, how are they?

>>221674104
cull the greys

>>221674173
Que?

>>221674052
>be me, a tradesman
>take on a job to frame a roof for an extension
>client is a lovely Indian couple
>husband is a gp
>wife immediately shows interest, making me mango lassi and samosas
>constantly coming over to chat and flirt
>says husband is away tomorrow visiting family but I should come back to "make sure everything is OK with the job"
>understand the brief
>return the next day
>she answers the door in tight leggings and a crop top
>says the house has CCTV so we have to be careful
>go to her car
>do the needful
>husband comes home mid-coitus
>catches us violently rutting in her car
>starts screaming at her, says he only just bought her the car and this is how she chooses to repay him, etc
>turns to me and thanks me again for a great job on the roof, says he'll have my money Monday from 9am and that I can collect anytime
>wipe my knob on the seat
>put clothes back on
>leave
>know that on Monday I will redeem £2600 for that job

And there are people ITT who would rather toil in an office, for a pittance, never once getting so much as a crumb of snatch

>>221674104
squirrelberg on a mad one

>>221674158
arr rook same
>>221674150
isn't it weird she leapt onto the scene being a commie girl who humiliated some infowars reporter, got some acting career out of her newfound fame which led to her being on the biggest show on tv, then she started flirting with chudism and is now without an agent

she's living life at a million miles an hour

>>221674193
imagine the smell

Should I move to Australia?

>>221674193
jay

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season should have been cancelled before it even began

>>221674235
know a fat lad (over 20 stone) who did it and he's actually shagging over there and making good cash too

Used to have an Indian side ting wrapped around my finger and I could get nudes pretty much any time I wanted. She then got a bf and the nudes got less frequent. Then she got engaged and has become annoyingly loyal to him and have had nothing for about 2 years

>>221674118
horrible, even more awake now because im thinking about all the other things i instinctually do because of social conditioning
>>221674193
i think all sexhavers should die. the story was complete dross, but your ilk being genocided is something im looking forward to lucid dreaming about, so i think youve indirectly helped me fall asleep

there's nothing you can't do

someone posted here the other day that their favourite song is the throning by hype williams which is a bit strange. like saying your favourite film is last year at marienbad

>>221674287
cant get shagged in my fanny (dont have one)

>>221674289
everyone likes different things

>>221674289
haha yeah
*walks away and stands alone in the corner*

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k-nex mentioned last night in my post
then im watching x-files
BAM
k-nex
spooky
this could be a case for mulder and scully

>>221674287
yeah that cow is rotating like a mf in my mind rn

>>221674283
>your ilk being genocided
don't think you quite grasp how sex works mate
they are the ones who are going to stay around

>>221674287
I can't breed

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My Carly conspiracy theory is that she is the one behind the leaks, whether or not she’s the one doing the uploading. I don’t think we’ve had any leaks since the baby was born, which makes me wonder if I’m correct.

The last leak was a massive one, which I am still making my way through. I’m pretty sure that was before the baby was born? Almost like it was to tide us over until she got back into the swing of things?

>>221674287
I can't jump to the moon

voting Reform at the next genny lection

>>221674316
Synchronicity innit. Happens to me a lot. Carl Jung wrote about it. Don't try reading that book though it's impossible.

Spaffed twice this evening
Somebody stop me

>>221674266
all of you niggas are villains.

what tthis nigga talkin bout>>221674349

>>221674364
do it on or in me next time? x

>>221674342
Cut your knob off because you thought you were a woman? I hear about this a lot these days.

>>221674349
no one arksed

>>221674349
What leaks you talking about lad, stop speaking in tongues, out with it already.
We men of Brit don't have time for this nonsense

>>221674390
nah I'm not that kind of incel

Tesco man here with my cans any minute now lads I'm buzzing

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>>221673903
it do be sounding like dat

>>221674410
unreleased songs from emotion and dedicated eras

>>221674381
gladly

>>221674381
... Do you have a fannois?

>>221674261
im a fat lad
maybe i could make good money

she's been leaking unreleased songs from emotion and dedicated eras.

what about that do you not understand exactly?

>>221674430
You've lost me lad.
Thought you meant nudes or something.
Fuck SAKE

>>221674422
Nice

>>221673871
(you)

(8) pen pineapple apple chimp (8)

>>221674458
gana gana gana gana caminmypants

suppose i should do the washing up

she's far too fit for 40 years old!

thursday tomorrow then lovely friday or as I've taken to calling it "pengday"

farting has stopped today thank goodness

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>>221674464
the nudes are already out

love seeing the ol' 'neapple chimp me

>>221674464
he is bent, why would he be talking about her nudes?

this project hail mary movie is nice

Multivitamin washed down with beer.
You love to see it

new gf practically worships me
whenever we're talking I notice her eyes drift down to my lips because she just wants to kiss me all the time

Feels good atm but I can foresee this getting annoying at the drop of a hat unfortunately.

girls who want boys who like boys to be girls who do boys like they're girls who like girls like they're boys

>>221674541
Going to see that sheep murder mystery one at the weekend me I am innit

>>221674559
lok

>>221674559
lobster too buttery steak tot juicy

>>221674541
turned it off me
cant be done with this genre of sci fi films where its like a rescue or some bollocks like that, like the martian as well with matt damon
if it had actually happened then yeah, fine, celebrations and that
but the writer can just make up any old technology to either help or hinder the rescue attempt
nah, not for me

>>221674559
Hard to tell but I think mine is in love with me or something. Made her cry while drunk and the next day she was round for a cuddle and shag etc.
Don't know what she sees in me frankly

>>221674365
What are you on about?

>>221674559
just show her /brit/ and say you post here when you want to get rid of her

wish my mom was 40

>>221674559
jay

listening to the Moominvalley theme song
not enjoying it :\

>>221674559
she probably thinks about her exes on occasion thougheverbeit

>>221674619
*were

>>221674619
my mum was 40 once

Hi 35, M, separated. Have a child free week start of June so looking for last minute getaway recommendations. Apprehensive about a solo holiday but don’t really fancy spending it in the UK. Would like good weather. Not really any budget. Recommendations welcome….

>>221674657
ever fuck her arse

>>221674619
my mum was 40 when he had me

>>221674695
rorke

yeah don't need to see that

3-0 Villa lads

>>221674695
Coooorrr, so this is rorke

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>>221674695

>>221674695
left unwell

>>221674559
once made a woman cry by telling her i was never going to talk to her again. closest ive been to being loved.