Cooking with Alice!
maybe if alice had some restraint, like renko, she could get a friend, or maybe, even a boyfriend
>>50018625She's such a skilled cook, all her friends love her food!
>>50018695Alice really needs to learn subtlety.
>>50018695Oh, so now making threads to close to one another is worse than ACTUAL CRIMES?
>>50018769All 3 of them?
>>50019814>3Marisa is her only friend
>>50019821Reimu invites her to parties and she at least talks to Yukari sometimes.
>>50019847Reimu only invites her because she's a friend of a friend.Yukari talks to her because she's obligated to as the de facto leader of Gensokyo.
>>50019852>Reimu only invites her because she's a friend of a friend.If they know each other and generally get along, it sounds like they're friends. Having a common friend they are both closer with doesn't change that.>Yukari talks to her because she's obligated to as the de facto leader of Gensokyo.Just like how the mayor of a town is forced to talk to every single person in that town?
>>50018625FUCK ALICE
>>50019867Marry her first!
>>50019861Reimu doesn't think much of her and Alice doesn't go out a lot. They rarely talk and only know each other from Marisa>Just like how the mayor of a town is forced to talk to every single person in that town?Yes. Just a job bro. Nothing more.
>>50019876How often do Okina and Kasen talk to Alice? How often has Wriggle talked to Yukari?
>>50019882>Okina and Kasen Those two bitches don't do shit compared to Yukari even though Yukari sleeps most of the time.>How often has Wriggle talked to Yukari?At least once, which isn't that much less than Alice.
>>50019886>Those two bitches don't do shit compared to Yukari even though Yukari sleeps most of the time.So then it's not a sage's job to talk to everyone.>At least once, which isn't that much less than Alice.There's a very different context. If Alice, who doesn't go out a lot, feels comfortable asking Yukari for help, and Yukari obliges, then they must be at least somewhat close. How many people could even ask Yukari for anything, let alone get her to do what they were asking for?
>>50018695ah, yes. renko, who famously has a lot of friends and a boyfriend.
>>50019916LMAO
If you were Alice's boyfriend which of Alice's sisters would you cheat on her with
If you were Alice's boyfriend would you let your friends sleep with her
Renko has a lot of "friends" who use her as an onahole when she is passed out drunk at parties
>>50019930Let me guess, are they all foreigners from the southern hemisphere?
>>50019925Her...sisters?
>>50019946Pink AliceLouise Blue AliceHat AliceMaid Alice
>>50020080Very good, very good, HOWEVERAlice's motherAlice's motherAlice's motherAlice's motherAlice's mother
>>50020083Sex with Shinki doesn't count as cheating. It's just the natural way of things.
>>50019899Alice, stop coping and just admit it. You have no friends lol
I'll breed Alice's mother while she gets to watch.
>>50020316>>50020263>>50020083>>50019946Shinki oyakudon strikes again.I'm not saying Alice isn't hot, but her mother is just peak breedable.
>>50019821I'll be her friend then! I'm going to sit next to her at the upcoming party at the Shrine and strike up conversations with her.
>>50019821>Marisa is her... friendYou're making a big assumption there anon.>>50019847>>50019852Alice the party crasher!
>>50019929Only Alice's girlfriends can sleep with my Alice!
>>50019861>If they know each other and generally get along, it sounds like they're friends.Alice literally tried to kill Reimu with voodoo.
>>50021087All doll cursing rituals are done in shrine forests, regardless of who they're aimed at.
>>50021120A likely story. You're just jealous of how much time Marisa spends with her, aren't you?
>>50021143Are you jealous that Alice's threads regularly hit the bump limit, unlike yours?
>>50019925>>50019929>>50021061Stop this nonsense already Alice doesn't have a single friend let alone a lover!
>>50021174Considering this thread is half people calling her pathetic and half wanting to cuck her?
>>50019876Alice calls Reimu old friend in PCB and her SWR route ending has Alice nudging Reimu to do something about the incident while she's being a lazy fuckZUN himself states she's similar to Reimu in her PCB profile too in some ways
>>50021326>Alice calls Reimu old friendMaybe Reimu would watch Alice's doll shows in the village when she was little?
call me crazy but I think they met before in the series
Shitposting after having sex with Arisu Magatoroido!
>>50021452All of this is just Alice coping with being a loser femcel. All of it.Not that [you] don't like her, she's just going to hide from the world whilst simultaniously seething about not being able to land dates, the worst kind of woman there is.Until you cock-correct her, that is. But that'll never happen.
>>50018625Why does Alice cook if she doesn't need to eat?
>>50021594She hasn't been a youkai that long, so she still carries over habits from being a human.
>>50021594What if she stopped eating but that part of the process didn't take effect yet and then she died from starvation.It'd be a dumb way to go. Better to keep eating just in case. Plus food is tasty.
>>50021793We get hungry because of a lack of energy. If she wouldn't need to eat, she wouldn't get hungry.
>>50021594I like to imagine the position of Alice's hut puts her in a perfect place to intercept people either coming from the forest to the village or leaving the village, so she continued cooking just to be more hospitable to those wanderers.
>>50018695>Renko>boyfriendYeah anon, totally possible.
>>50021877Just you wait and see.
>>50021818To be honest, finding your way to Alice's house seems like just about the ideal scenario for an outsider.
>>50021475>youI already took the burden of becoming Reimu's husband so someone else has to take the fall and go for Alice
I draw Alice
>>50022382Why does a puppeteer need such large breasts?
>>50022382Keep your shitty doodles to one thread, attention whore.
>>50022382/v/ermin niggers like you deserve the ropewhen will tranny mods finally ban /jp/hu bros
>>50019886why do you want okina to talk to you, *lice?leave her alone
>>50022382that's a cute Alice
>>50022382Alice is a serene, joyous girl in a serious shell. This doesn't transmit serenity, joy or seriousness.
>>50019663>>50019916>>50021877okay, that's enoughfirst, those were ALLEGED crimes, and she wasn't detained, so it doesn't count.second, renko had SEVERAL, intimate, boy friends, people just happen to not remember her. maybe it is a new ability awakened.
>>50021877Every man on /jp/ is 50% Renko's boyfriend until he is observed, after which probability collapses and he becomes someone who has never even met her.
>>50022390To see how easily you can be controlled
>>50022686This one at least looks joyous.
>>50021283By "people" you mean the samefag who makes it his mission to shit up Alice threads with the same played out shitposts?
>>50022840Anon I'm pretty sure nobody bullies Alice more than actual Alicefags. That's at least 28.5714% of her appeal.
>>50022878Yeah, but actual Alicefags have a very particular style of bullying Alice, which you don't see in most of those posts; so that anon's theory might actually be plausible.
>>50022686after being hypnotized so much I see that Alice is finally trying to change things by being the one who hypnotizes someone
>>50022382>>50022686ignore the retarded weeners, cute Alices
>>50022931fuck off to pissu, tard
>>50022937apply you own advice and fuck off attention whore.
>>50022954again, fuck off back to pissu
>>50022964again, kill yourself out of /jp/
>>50022972>i said the thing!!you will never belong hereback to pissu
Take your /v/igger celeb worship to a different thread, subhuman. This thread is about Alice, not about your favorite shitter from the OC thread.
>>50022976who are you quoting? retard-kun?
>>50022980>i said the other thing!back
blah blah cry moar and tongue my anus
/jp/hu is the worst faggotry to befall this board this year
derailing an entire thread because a guy you don't like posted a drawingsasuga
derailing an entire thread because someone said something bad about the drawmonkey you're obsessed withsasuga
>>50022988voca.ro/19ZMwECTHobE
>>50022988Thats a big Marisa
Would you ook at that, someone with a fag voice calling anyone a faggot Point and laugh everyone
shit thread, bye retards.
I swear to god, if one more faggot cries not about a drawing, but the guy who fucking drew it also posting on /v/, I will go nuts.Go complain in the crossie thread instead of acting like a god damned 14 year old trying to fit in with the cool kids. Now post Alice or gtfo, you fucking children.
>>50023043voca.ro/1hlZrLLjKwC6
>>50023057Sorry I'd rather not get AIDS from listening to your homo cock sucking voice, cute Alice
>>50023057post your cute little dick sissy
>>50023055seems like a raid of some sort its funny how butthurt they are getting tho
Why do Alice threads always attract the worst shitposters?
>>50023095voca.ro/1cfGk7fNSJA9
>>50021087that was parsee though, literally zero proof it was alicew beyond someone hating alice and trying to give her a bad rep
>>50022937>>50022964>>50022976>>50022981stfu retard, no one owns loyalty to this shithole, specially after the mods let those undertale fags roam free
>>50023104Honestly yeah.
>>50023110And which third world country are you from, anon?
>>50023120just leave ESL
>>50023104Last one was fine. I think it's just that this one is too early, and newniggers can't appreciate an artist that contributes more to /jp/ than they ever will.
>>50023110see >>50023061
Alice hates niggers
>>50023159>contributes more to /jp/ than they ever will.anyone that can make ms paint doodles is essentially a god to youpathetic
Even if you don't like the oc or its creator, drawing attention to it just derails the Alice discussion even more.
>>50023193>implying that there was a meaningful discussion
>>50023193Last thread was literally yesterday. There needs to be time between threads for contributors to recharge, especially when there's like 4 alicefags total. This is what happens, I guess.>50023183God, this is the bait people are falling for? Kill yourself.
You're all retards
so true~
Alice Deserves Bad Threadsmakai creatures have no rights
What does it taste like
>>50023222Die
>>50023220Correct, that why we like Alice(a retard).
>>50023211you have aids, secondary
>50023244I know you're sad I can't pipe you raw anymore, anon
A reminder to take Alice's teaching to heart.
Why can't alice have nice threadsinstead we have constant arguing and complaining over OC and bullyingwhy are you all like this? Give alice a good thread and get along.
>>50023264Rough start is all. Remember Alice, and all will be well.
>>50022931>>50022954>>50022972>>50022988Never seen these ones before, thanks
>>50023256>see i did the thing where i didnt actually reply to you! that got you good!you have zero genuine interest in 2hu, imageboard dweller
desperate for attention today are we
How long are you fags going to continue your gay fucking argument forCancerous retards who will do anything but discuss Alicebottom of the barrel posters
alice leaks poop
>>50023279post chart
>>50023300its a character thread faggot, the only reason anyone is here is for the imagesyour babble has zero value whether its sophisticated discussion about how much you wanna fuck alice or just monkey shitflingingi cant believe some niggers genuinely wake up and think "i'm gonna contribute to /jp/ today!">>50023322>charts, unironicallyyou probably think a lunatic 1cc is impressive
>>50023336it's a thread for discussing ALICE and talking about ALICE not for your SHITFLINGING and DRAMA and RAGEBAITyou fucking nigger you need to KILL YOURSELF and stop shitting up the thread.
just stop feeding the trolls goddamnit's not that hard
I guess I like Alice
>>50023351oh man im really missing out by not engaging in serious discussion with youyou have so many original things to say i betas if there's a single thought in your head worth being relayed you worm fucking die
>>50023369fucking kill yourself you subhuman faggotruining my fucking alice threadsi'm not even the OC guy i'm just pissed off when I see retards like you creating constant arguing like this you are subhuman DIEDIE DIE DIE DIE DIE "people" like you need to be rounded up and shot
>>50023380the twink you're arguing with has a big ole smile on his face right now because you're taking all his baiti can't really be angry at him when he sounds gay but you do you
>>50023369Go back to posting vocaroos so we can keep laughing at your gay lisp
>>50023386I know It's probably bait I just need to vent out my frustrations
So go punch a wall. The carousel's just going to keep going round and round if you keep spinning it. At least we're getting cute Leeces out of it.
>>50023355Alice would get trolled so fucking hard on Gensokyo /jp/ tbf
>>50023400Won't that just make holes in the wall?But yeah you're rightIt just sickens me people even try this shit here
>>50023406Imagining sitting outside Alice's room and candidly listening to her throw shit around her room because someone got her. I love my incredibly gullibe, emotionally volatile shut-in wife!>>50023412Yeah, it's the internet. The smugness from stirring people's shit is addictive. They'd do it anywhere they get a reaction, it's never personal.
>>50023389no not everything you dislike is bait i genuinely just hate secondaries such as youglad i didnt let you have the hugboxing you need to keep your mental illness in check
Cute!
>>50023479In every timeline.
>>50023458Cute lesbians, post more.
>>50023501Alice-chan really needs to use her full range of motion more. Making dolls all day can't be good for your back, and she's gonna be living with it forever!
alice makes me madshe must pay me back with SEX
>>50023442You don't have to be married to (or even properly meet) her to have that experience!
>>50018625
>>50022937Off topic but since when was Kissu hated on jp or am i not active enough here to knowI remember during the hack everyone was flocking to there or 8/jp/
>took alice four months to get halfway to the image limit last thread>caught back up to it in a single dayGoddamn, Alice really does attract maniacs!Now, I've noticed quite a couple recycled from last thread (both picrel and >>50024182, which was uploaded by a different anon but he kept my filename for it), but it isn't all of them so that's pretty good.
>>50024222Sorry that was me witb the latest oneDidn't realise it was a repost, the download date for it is from back in july on my computer so I didn't realise.
>>50024222Nevermind I'm a retard, I misread the bump limit as the image limit.Still, more than a quarter of the way there so soon isn't bad at all!
>>50024232Early august actually my bad
>>50024241>the last thread was created back in JuneW-What...
>>50024194Or am I really out of touch now, I don't use this board much anymore outside of the alice thread and DJTWhat's /jp/hu? is that where the /v/hu people are now? what are they doing that's bad? I don't get it
>>50019861>If they know each other and generally get along, it sounds like they're friends.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MyRePrIM6HA>>50021052I'm sure Alice and Yuuka would be great friends!They're both very reclusive, have strong fixations other people are weirded out/intimidated by, they're both heavily associated with rape, they're both in my top three...Doesn't sound like they'd meet each other a whole lot, but we just need miss matchmaker Yukari to solve that problem!
Could you get Alice to start stripping just by staring daggers at pressure points in her clothing?If not, what would it take for her to start acting as embarrased as she would be if she were fully nude when she's actually fullt-clothed?
>>50018625Bonding by cooking together is so cute and homely... I've dearly missed the simple and innocent stuff like this ever since becoming an adult... it's all so hollow now.By all means I'll take you up on the offer! My cuisine may be average and I rarely do it out of laziness, but I'll try my best for Alice!
>>50021326Yeah but Reimu doesn't even recognize this bitch lol. Said it right to her face in PCB.Btw I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be a funny PC-98 reference.
>>50024447>Yeah but Reimu doesn't even recognize this bitch lol.To be fair, Reimu seems incapable of remembering anyone who's not constantly showing up to her. She'd probably forget Marisa after a month.
>>50024447Reimu is an arsehole, what's new
>>50022686Draw yuri!
>>50024269>they're both heavily associated with rapeImagine Alice ganging up on you with her dolls, raping you while 10+ dolls pin you down.
>>50025018It's hard for me to imagine Alice as a rapist, I think of her more as the rapee if anything.Random strangers may think she's creepy, desparate, and willing to use whatever powers she has to get what she wants, but she's still only as old as most anons and is recluisive precisely because she doesn't want interpersonal contact. Yuuka, on the other hand, is much older, much more connected to "nature", is much more powerful, and gives much less of a fuck about everything...
>>50025548Alice is the type of girl that would constantly try to send signals to a guy she likes (who obliviously misses each and every one) before finally having a crash out and just drugging and raping him.
I wish to be good enough for Alice
>>50023386pretending to be retarded = retarded
>>50026325you are not smart
>>50024194I think it's mostly shitposters who are trying to portray kissu negatively and prevent people from leaving because they know they wouldn't be able to pull off half their antics there without getting banned.
>>50026410emotional today are we
>>50026438zero ability to follow the conversation award
>>50026217alice's house, expenses, sewing material? all provided by Shinki and Makai's Public Empoverished Support.with that in consideration, how are (You) doing, anon? no one is below alice.
>>50026943Financially things are getting better, but alcohol eternally calls
>>50026943nta but if the game I gotta win at is federal aid:> section 8 housing> bridge card>job in HS was walking on the side of the road because I couldn't find no-qualification work in the dead of the rust belt> college was mostly paid for via Pell GrantI think Alice-chan is all mine!
>>50025018>>50025548>>50026194Alice is a youkai who's more than powerful enough to have her way with any mere human, but she's good-natured at heart and she wouldn't force herself on anyone without their consent.
>>50027178Actually youkai magicians are singled out in PMiSS as being only average human strength, far weaker than most youkai. If you got past her dolls Alice is a normal woman with normal woman strength, as a man you should easily overpower her.
>>50027178Alice, I know it's you. We all know that you're mad as a hatter from all the mercury needed to become a witch, and you couldn't cast fireball quickly enough to stop a determined sinsack from making Rinnosukes with you if you tried. Just lie back and accept that you're alone because no one wants to talk to the weirdo in the woods and not because you're such a nice girl you won't go out and rape someone,
Alice is a friendly autist who is content to romantically suffer alone rather than doing something bad to someone else.
>>50027222Speaking of suffering alone: would Alice self-harm? If so, what method would she prefer? I'm asking so I can imagine myself restraining her with a bear hug and forcefully coddling her so she stops, by the way.
>>50027236No.I'm tempted to just leave it there but to elaborate Alice isn't that type of person. It's fun to joke about her being lonely but she's awkward, not depressed. She's shown to be a pretty self realized person, if anything she's a little arrogant.
>>50027259Yeah, I think it's best to just leave it there as well. I don't need to project my own stuff onto her, even if I see the odd similarities between us. Alice is simply a cute.
>>50027197She doesn't rely on her dolls for everything, she's still capable of firing danmaku on her own. Trying to get in on her or anyone capable of danmaku would be dangerous because any attacker would be vaporized in an instant.
>>50027268I get the temptation, and I don't think there's any harm in imagining a scenario where you discover Alice is going through mental anguish that you can personally relate to, but do so while acknowledging that it's a derivative take on the character. It's a compelling scenario even if it doesn't perfectly fit Alice as we know her in canon.
>>50027278We can't strictly use danmaku as a metric since danmaku is specifically non-lethal. We'd need a better idea of what type of magic Alice can perform, something we don't really have
>>50027519alice at least knows magic missile, r-right?s-she can't be that inept
>>50027519Danmaku is only non-lethal when spell card rules are applied. I don't think Alice or anyone for that matter would be willing to apply non-lethal spell card rules to anyone trying to physically assault her.
>>50027633Spell cards, by their definition, are non-lethal. Alice probably does have lethal magic, especially if her PC98 appearance is taken as canon, but it would be seperate from standard spell cards.
>>50027676That isn't what he was saying, if anything you agreed with him.The point is that she's going to be shooting a twelve gauge instead of her typical nerf darts at your head if you're trying to rape her.But maaaaybe a lonely man from the human village or a lucky gappy who found his way there got a little too desparate for affection with the cute magician girl and was mistaken for a pervert when he suddenly tried to hug her!After mopping up the remains, Alice is far more hesitant to act so violently, and thus sexy fun times with her could be possible through the inverse of the boy who cried wolf!
>>50027715You're adverse to the idea of overpowering Alice but ok with inflicting psychological trauma on her?Actually that's a pretty typical theme itt so I guess that's to be expected.
Why do you Anons want to rape Alice so much? Raping people isn't nice. Alice is a nice person, I'm sure she would give you at least a chance.
>>50027989I don't want to rape her, I want to watch while Yuuka rapes her!
>>50027989What kind of person would Alice accept into her heart?
>>50028061me
alice paladins revealing their true colorssad display indeed
>>50028159This poster was raped by Shanghai while Alice watched.
>>50028198
>>50028061Posting Walfas is a worse and more disgusting crime than anything else that has been posted in this thread so far.
Alice committing crimes...
>>50028404What kind of crime would Alice commit? I don't see her being a violent criminal, so that's off the table. Not really much of a thief either.
>>50028415What about every computer crime there exists a law for?
How many times have (You) slept with Alice?
>>50028415Murder
>>50028415Not illegal in Gensokyo, but do you think Alice is a lolicon?
>>50028731Shotacon
>>50018625Alice is such a good cook I'm surprised she doesn't have a boyfriend!!!
Do you think Arisu would be into really kinky shit like scat or getting off to me drinking her piss? She seems the kind that would be into that once she found a bf
>>50034977No but I like that one doujin where Alice's boyfriend keeps forcing her to wear clothing that he's filled with his own cum so I'll elect to believe that she'd be down for that.
>>50034985LINK DAT SHIT
>>50034977I imagine the idea of non-vaginal sex confuses her to the point that even though her dolls are anatomically correct otherwise, they all lack buttholes. You would have to go over the concept of sumata or paizuri several times with her to get her to understand, while stuff like facesitting or footjobs would be incomprehensible. She'd understand bdsm and be good at it, but be too afraid of hurting you to do it, but would probably respond well to it being done to her. As a magician, she doesn't need to eat, so she doesn't process food, and wouldn't understand why someone would want to interact with her bodily wastes. Even if she tried it, it'd probably come out roughly the same as it went in either due to not digesting it or using magic to make it consumable because she really cannot understand why you'd want it to be gross. Probably about the only thing she'd be into would be blowjobs and swallowing because it triggers some latent youkai urges to put humans in her mouth, but she'd store up your semen and use that to produce "wastes" for you if you continued asking her about scat/piss.
>>50034995It took a minute but I found the one that had the specific scene I was thinking of.https://exhentai.org/g/1039265/07e608764c/This artist actually does a lot of this type of stuff, especially with Alice.
>>50035074I didn't know I had this fetish
>>50035072>wouldn't understand why someone would want to interact with her bodily wastes>she really cannot understand why you'd want it to be grossBecause it's hot, Alice. Goddamn.
>>50035072Reading this again, I feel like I should add that my reasoning is because Alice is this isolated entity in already isolated Gensokyo, her lack of interaction leaves her ignorant of sex and childmaking if not for having seen animals in the forest do it, and being away from modern media and the village, she has likely never seen, nor even imagined the concept of, pornography and all its fetishistic content. She's probably equally ignorant about dating, marriage, and relationships in general, so she wouldn't be especially prudish around someone she was attracted to either.