____ ____ ____ ____
doki doki suwako wako
don't let you down
be in desert years
>>50428728R A P E
>>50428775doki doki suwako waki
>>50428728Why is Seiga so perfect
>>50430267You have issues.
>>50428728I Want To Cum Inside Kaku Seiga
I want Seiga to destroy me
>>50428728Even in death~Even in death~Even in death~
Does anyone have that image of Seiga using Yoshika to hold her breasts like a bra? I NEED it.
>>50430516>>50430641Many such cases.
>>50440507
>>50441475I want that job.
>>50441475That's the one, thank you.
>>50441475Her seal says "tiddies".
>>50441557Is that how you write tiddies in Japanese? Looked like gibberish to me.
>>50441672Yeah, they're different moon runes, that's Russian. Tharr be wroten сиси.
>>50441759>Titties in russian is cncnNice, that's valuable knowledge I will carry forever now.
>>50441774The journey of a thousand steps begins with a single сися! I'll do you another: the more vulgar "tits" is сиськи = sees'ki (and сиси is pronounced CC, see-see).
+1 Seiga because I can't just be talking about titties without posting her
>>50441858I can't talk about Seiga without mentioning her tits.
Yeah, everyone loves Seiga's saggy tits, but what about her fat ass?
>>50428728DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS
>>50442793It's kinda weird, but I've Mandela Effected myself into thinking she has a ghostly mermaid tail like Tojiko does, to the point where seeing her with human legs doesn't feel right. But that's a good thing, because I greatly prefer that kind of setup. And by the nines, it's still fat.
>>50443270Steve Ballmer was the true Touhou project.
Seiga saturn
>>50428728
>>50441858She looks so innocent without the cat hair style
tfw you find an unsupervised child out of the village
want Seiga to destroy me
>>50453542What are you trying to slide?
The Human Village had seen festivals, drunken brawls, and the occasional invasion of religious solicitations, but it had rarely seen an event quite as blindingly opulent as the wedding of Anon the Salt Merchant.Red carpets, usually reserved for the Tengu’s diplomatic envoys or the rare visit from a noble house, had been rolled out over the packed dirt of the main thoroughfare. The usual scent of grilled eel and miso was buried under an avalanche of expensive, imported floral arrangements—lilies that cost more than a farmer’s yearly harvest and roses that looked suspiciously perfect, likely grown with magic or high-grade fertilizer from the Bamboo Forest.Standing at the altar—a hastily constructed gazebo draped in silk and gold leaf—was Anon.To call him an unlikely match for a legendary hermit would be the understatement of the century. Anon was a man whom gravity had courted aggressively for four decades. He was short, rotund, and possessed a gleaming scalp that had surrendered the battle for hair coverage long ago, retaining only a defiant horseshoe fringe of grey fuzz around the ears—a classic Norwood 7. Sweat beaded on his forehead, rolling down the vast expanse of his pink skin like rain on a polished stone.He sniffled, wiping his eyes with a silk handkerchief that probably cost as much as a small shrine."I can't believe it, Toshiaki..." Anon blubbered, his voice trembling with an emotion that was equal parts disbelief and sheer, overwhelming gratitude. "She... she actually said yes. A woman of her stature. An intellectual! She said she was fascinated by the intricacies of salt logistics...!"Toshiaki, the best man and fellow merchant, stood beside him. He was a taller, leaner man with a face etched in permanent skepticism. He adjusted his collar, looking out at the sea of guests, the mountains of gifts, and the nervous priest sweating through his robes."She is interested in something alright," Toshiaki muttered, his eyes narrowing as he watched a server carry a tray of whole roasted piglets past the front row. "I’ve never seen someone ask for the financial ledgers before the ring size, Anon.""That’s just her pragmatic nature!" Anon insisted, clutching Toshiaki’s shoulder with a clammy hand. "She wants to build a future! An empire of brine and commerce!"Toshiaki patted his friend's hand, offering a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "Sure, buddy. An empire."The music swelled. It wasn't the traditional flute and drum of the village; it was a heavy, orchestral swell pumped through speakers powered by kappa-tech generators hidden behind the flower arrangements. The crowd turned.The bride walked down the aisle.Seiga Kaku was a vision, though exactly what kind of vision depended heavily on who you asked. To Anon, she was a goddess descended from the heavens. To the informed observer, she was a shark gliding into a pool of tuna.She had forgone the traditional white kimono and hood. Instead, she wore a lavish, Western-style wedding gown, a corseted explosion of lace and satin with a train that required two terrified zashiki-warashi to carry. The dress was pure white, innocent in color only. The neckline plunged with a daring aggression that made the village elders clutch their prayer beads. Her blue hair was swept up in an intricate, jeweled arrangement, her eyes sparkling with a mischief that Anon mistook for love.The height difference was comedic. As she reached the altar and stood next to Anon, she towered over him. He stared directly at her chest, not out of lechery, but simply because that was where his eye level naturally fell.The priest cleared his throat, looking visibly uncomfortable as he glanced between the beaming, sweating groom and the radiant, smirking hermit."We are gathered here today..." the priest began, his voice cracking slightly. He leaned closer to the couple, dropping his voice to a whisper meant only for the front row. "Why in the spirits' names did she insist on a Western-style wedding? We don't even have the right liturgy for this."In the front row, reserved for village dignitaries and 'security,' Keine Kamishirasawa sat with her arms crossed, her sharp eyes tracking Seiga’s every movement."She liked how the dress showed off her chest," Keine stated flatly. Her tone suggested she had tried to veto the outfit on grounds of public decency and failed. "She claimed it was 'exotic foreign culture' and threatened to file a discrimination complaint if we stopped her."
>>50450947Same energy
>>50453711Seiga's a gold digger?
>>50450947kys shotacuck
>>50454214but tourist-sama, seiga is the shotacon 2hu
>>50454868I have been here on this board since 2014, newfag. I will never stop hating shotacucks
>>50454980>2014>newfaglook at him trying>I will never stop hating shotacucksdont visit sanae, or seiga, threads (like this one) while you are passing by, then
>>50428728KISUME BABY, BABABA BABY!
SEXSEX WITH LITTLE BOYSSEXUAL RELATIONS WITH LITTLE BOYSSEIGA HAVING SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH TINY LITTLE BOYS
>>50453711Fun read
>>50456304Need a story of Seiga seducing shotas.
>>50456304I mean she is a Taoist. The Tantric sex shit is part and parcel. What did you expect?
>>50428728SEI GA KA KU
>>50428856just keep my quesadilla
Further back, near the buffet tables that groaned under the weight of high-end delicacies, the real commentary track was running.Reimu Hakurei was currently engaged in a violent, one-sided duel with a lobster. She cracked a claw with the ease of someone who smashed youkai for a living. Her chipmunk-like appearance undermined her authority as the Shrine Maiden of Paradise."That guy is doomed,"Soga no Tojiko sighed, swirling a cup of sake. The ghost hovered slightly off her chair as she watched her colleague at the altar with a mix of secondhand embarrassment and pity. "Look at him. He thinks he won the lottery.""Huh!?" Reimu swallowed a massive chunk of lobster meat, nearly choking. "He's doomed? Are you kidding? If anything, he should be rewarded. A headache is now pacified and out of the game forever. Or at least a few months."Reimu pointed a buttery chopstick at the altar. "Think about it. While she’s busy playing house and spending his money, she isn't digging holes in my shrine's walls or reanimating corpses in the cemeteries. The village should pay him a containment fee.""It's fake, Reimu. It's a gold-digging op,"Marisa Kirisame chimed in. The magician was currently shoving expensive hors d'oeuvres into her pockets while balancing a glass of champagne. "She's gonna drain the poor man's coffers faster than a succubus. Look at the rock on her finger."Marisa gestured with her chin toward Seiga’s hand, where a diamond the size of a pigeon’s egg glittered violently in the sunlight."I heard the rumors at the bar,"Marisa continued, grinning with the appreciation of a fellow thief. "Anon-jiisan is liquidating his assets. He sold two warehouses last week just to buy that. Salt futures are down, but 'Seiga Futures' are trading at an all-time high."Tojiko squinted at the ring. "Knowing her, she probably provided the diamond herself.""Hah?" Reimu paused in her demolition of a crab leg. "What do you mean?""She has vaults of stolen treasures from before the Barrier,"Tojiko explained, her voice dropping. "She likely 'found' a seller who had the perfect ring, available immediately for a premium price. That seller was probably Yoshika in a trench coat and sunglasses."Marisa nearly spit out her champagne. "Exactly! That’s the play! She sells him her own stolen loot; he pays her for the privilege of giving it back to her. It’s a closed-loop economy of fraud."The magician wiped a tear of laughter from her eye. "It would be exactly like the time when she stole people's presents at Christmas and sold them back at a markup. She keeps the ringandthe money. That's masterful, really. Take it from another swindler. I respect the hustle, even if it’s evil.""It is evil,"Tojiko groaned, burying her face in her hands. "We are supposed to be Taoists. Seekers of the Way. How does 'embezzling a salt merchant' lead to ascension?""It funds the research,"Reimu mumbled, grabbing a second lobster. "Immortality isn't cheap. Neither is that dress."Back at the altar, the ceremony reached its climax. Anon looked up at Seiga, his eyes shining with absolute devotion. He held her hands—smooth and pale as a grave’s incoming embrace—in his sweaty grip."I, Anon, take thee, Seiga…"Seiga smiled. It was the contentment of a cat that had not only caught the canary but had also convinced the canary to marinate itself in onions sauce beforehand."And I, Seiga, take thee…" She paused for dramatic effect, leaning down slightly so her cleavage was perfectly framed for the congregation. "…and all that you possess, to have and to hold.""To hold!" Anon echoed happily, missing the possessive nuance entirely."You may kiss the bride,"the priest announced, sounding relieved that lightning hadn't struck the altar yet.Anon went up on his tiptoes. Seiga didn't lean down. Instead, she offered her cheek with the regal indifference of an empress greeting a particularly loyal peasant. Anon settled for kissing her jawline, leaving a small patch on her makeup.The crowd erupted into applause. Petals rained down. Somewhere in the back, a barely disguised Yoshika Miyako clapped arrhythmically, her stiff arms swinging like clubs."Well,"Marisa said, downing the rest of her drink and patting her stuffed pockets. "Show's over. Time to hit the dessert table before the bride realizes she can pawn the chocolate fountain."Reimu nodded solemnly. "I give it three weeks before he's 'living' in a barrel and she's miraculously a widow.""Three weeks?" Tojiko floated up, shaking her head. "You underestimate her efficiency. I give it three days."As the happy couple walked back down the aisle—Anon waving frantically, Seiga waving like royalty—the Wicked Hermit caught Tojiko's eye. She offered a microscopic wink and then patted the heavy pocket of Anon's tuxedo where the checkbook lived.The Salt Merchant beamed, unaware that he had just been acquired, merged, and liquidated in a single afternoon.
>>50453711>>50461239
>>50461239you got the characters to a damn t. seiga selling her things just so she can make her loser of a temporal husband buy it back is something she would definitely do
>>50461239I trust that salt merchant Anon secretly knows a way to fix her, giga copium.