Which 2hu would you actually have a chance with and how would you court them?
>>50911747Kogasa, most of the human 2hus except the Shrine Maidens and the others, that's basically it.
>>50911747Yoshikaa girl that braindead would be my one and only option.
>>50911788Have to get Seiga's permission
>>50911769I can't see a reason why you wouldn't be able to date Reimu, or Sanae for that matter.
>>50911747Yukari, who I would court with how I DIY'd a model locomotive ages back.
>>50911806Reimu is too important and Kanako and Suwako would scare you off.
All touhous are lesbians who will kiss girls instead of you.
None. I'm far too disgusting to be tolerated.
>>50911830>Reimu is too importantYeah but that doesn't prevent her from finding someone. She spends a lot of her time doing nothing, so it's not like it would have to affect her work. Hell it could even make her work slightly easier, considering you'd be helping around the shrine. >Kanako and Suwako would scare you off.Why would they? I don't think they'd have any problem with Sanae finding someone. Maybe if they didn't like you?
>>50911907They just seem overly protective.
>>50911830In a meta-narrative sense, but to the average villager she's just a weirdo hermit who lives with Youkai. The reverence for her position is practically forgotten.
>>50911747Idk how to talk to woman, i do like video games so maybe Sanae though hobbies but that would be a miracle if it were to go remotely far.
>>50911934Mmm yeah but people like Yukari and other important Youkai would be the bigger deal
>>50912071>YukariWho cares about some smelly hag?
>>50912097The smelly hag cares about you potentially ruining the barrier. Yukari is paranoid as fuck.
>>50911806>>50911769Reimu and Sanae are literally underage you pedos. Go for women your own age, like Junko.
>>50912106>potentially ruining the barrierOh, I do plan on "ruining" the Hakurei barrier.
>>50912158>Go for women your own age, like Junko.Sorry heca but I'm not a 1000+ years old fossil.
>>50911747I wanna court Satorin! When she sees her stolen, cum-stained panties nailed to her front door, Satorin will realize the true depths of my LOVE! Then we get married and I have an affair with Koishi!
>>50911747I wanna train with Kasen but take her on dumb hijinks at the same time so she feels like she has to train me
>>50912158>>50912196I want to smash this virgin goddess so bad!!! Screw Junko!
>>50912158They were around for the moon landing and for cellphonesReimu is older than your grandma
>>50911747Waifu Akyuu, she is all things considered pretty close to just a normal girl. I expect it to be an uphill battle specially the very early stages where she'd be more inclined to dismiss anyone trying to court her without a second thought, but nothing that some perseverance can't handle it(Also an excuse to post the most recent comm)
>>50911797Seiga would probably be ok with it because it would be funny
>>50911806There's nothing officially in the way of you dating Reimu, but she's got a whole army of youkai who are overly possessive and have too much time on their hands to try and scare you off.Marisa would probably ship you and Reimu really hard though
>>50912158Fuck off Reimu we know you're in your 40s by now
>>50911747Imagine being such a massive virgin that a love confession makes you blush
>>50912475Ditching Reimu and confessing to your true love, the one who always supported you and stood with you, Marisa!
>>50912475>spoiler Cute. Actually Marisa might even help you get closer to Reimu.
I need Eirin to love me enough to hourai me but not enough to not hourai me you feel me?
>>50911747You severely overestimate our Anons' charms and severely underestimate Gensokyans' standards, mr. Anonymous.
>>50911747I can't get any action irl what makes you think it would be any different in Gensokyo?
>>50912877The vast majority of Gensokyo females are deranged, ticking time bombs, hedonistic and/or perverted (not necessarily in the sexual sense, either). Who knows, you might just be interesting in the eyes of a dangerous person.
>>50911747PatchouliThis is my Goodreads (I'm not posting this year, I've had to deal with a lot of shit in my life so it's embarrassingly low)
>>50912905>deranged, ticking time bombs, hedonistic and/or perverted (not necessarily in the sexual sense, either)This is different from real women.... how?
Realistically speaking, no human man could ever pull this creature off. As much as I would like to marry her, her canon personality would never find humans remotely attractive.
>>50912951They're similar, but there's a very essential difference between a cast featuring mostly monstrous, super-powered women sporting aeons' worth of wisdom plus life experience, and your average hysterical, spoiled college chick.Mokou's type of deranged is different from a BPD bitch's type of deranged, for example. She's actively manlier and tougher than most guys, though suffering from immortality for years tends to do that to you (except if you're lunarian, apparently). Some of those women are so detached from human existence, i wouldn't doubt if their taste in partners would also completely deviate from the norm to questionable degrees.
>>50912158but underage girls have tighter pussies and are hotter and don't have the stinky entitled personalities women develop after high school
>>50912349Where's his tuxedo and green head sack? How am I supposed to self insert if there's no green head sack???
>>50912986My belief is that love doesn't care much about what's "Realistic" and we human beings have a seemingly volatile existence. One day you could wake up and become a completely different person, sometimes we're capable of just 'understanding' things that we can neither quantify, nor convey, and what's more: I'm beginning to suspect that we are capable of manipulating events in the past with our actions in the present and future.Thinking "oh, she's a Youkai's youkai, no way she could love a Human" is accepting a framing based on consensus, but what makes the consensus true? Which consensus are you talking about? What constitutes a Human or a Youkai in their entirety and what it means for them to love each other?If you fell for Nue, and I mean, really developed a love for her beyond explanation, I think you could court her. I believe if your love was earnest and you chose to listen to your spirit that fortune would test your resolve, but aid you in equal measure if you held to the truth, and whatever hardships your relationship with the ancient Youkai would create, love would give you the strength to overcome those. But that's only if you'd realize that fact, or even had the chance to, because most people retard their spiritual sense and believe in a cold empirical world where our thinking only affects reality through the direct action they produce, a very Protestant belief, and one you'd have to overcome if you want a Youkai wife, because just like 'catching' luck, 'catching' a love requires that you open your spirit as a closed hand can grab onto nothing.>>50911747>Which 2hu would you actually have a chance with and how would you court them?My spirit is open, I play to win, and whatever exists beyond this world answers my prayers.I will court the one who captures my heart with 100% success!
ROMANTICFULFILLMENT
>>50913552You know what's more? You idiots really think that you have a choice in the matter?Right now, you're kept safe by the fact that we live in an abstract society where you can seclude yourselves from everyone else: but not so in Gensokyo. There, you're gonna have to go outside, and I imagine a lot of you will do well because all of you are addicts and without getting your fix all that time, attention, and drive is going to go somewhere else. You ever see what happens when a crack addict gets clean? The crack addicts who survived already went through natural selection and the ones that are able to get over their addiction have maximum drive.And when you become successful, learned, confident, and happy, you know who notices this? Woman, as well as the other demonic creature that inhabits Gensokyo that also happen to be Woman: Youkai.>Oh no way some unlovable loser like me will ever get a cute Youkai suitor!Fools. Be on the lookout for Tanuki and foxlike behavior, visit the shrines regularly and pray for protection, find a nice woman with a long, VERIFIABLE, family history who didn't fall from a peach tree or something when she was a kid(That's an Amonojaku). And if, IF you happen to catch a glimpse of a Youkai in the moonlight, the sight making your chest tighten, and you can only ever think of her from then on, know that when you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes back into you and that darkness feels the same: it also sees you at your best when you are unaware.Nothing more dangerous then a loser mentality combined with someone who's overcome their personal troubles.
run
>>50912158Reimu was underage when you probably were, but the Akyuu arc proves at least a decade has passed since EoSD so she's at the least in her mid 20s, and probably in her 30s like the average /jp/sie.
>>50913683they are going to kiss each other while you watch
Most youkai don't get along with humans and would be terrible wives. Most.
>>50913704So, the average 3dpd hates men, a youkai is an upgrade
>>50913840>missing the point just to whine like some /r9k/ touristkuso post
>>50913861Who are you quoting
>>50912986that's part of why Yandere 2hus are likedThese centuries old monsters wouldn't be attracted to humans normally, but funny wiring could make them like one human in particular far more than normalnot many plausible ways for a youkai to be attracted to any particular human without specific exceptions like that
itt: easy prey for the first youkai who says she loves them
>>50913882all she has to do is brush her tail against my arm, really
>>50913882Nah, the second one strand of Zanmu's hair touches my bare arm I'm going to assume it's a plot and empty my heart.I won't be fooled!
>>50912946You read more books in 2022 then I did in this decade
>>50911747Which touhou would be fond of a inexpreinced boyscout manfailure?I have strong ethics and dropped out of college.
>>50917098
>>50917118Nice, thanks. I would play retro games with her.
>>50917118Nah, that one is exclusively into real estate owners.
>>50911747I'd probably be a power couple with Meiling because I like to lift weights and train! Alas I'm into Sakuya...
>>50917201Good news! Meiling is also into Sakuya!
>>50913960I was about to call you weak, but then I imagined it happening to me and...
>>50913591SHUT UPSHUT UPSTOP MAKING ME WANT THIS
>>50917251You can't marry a spider. She'll web you up in the underground! And bring you fly-wrapped gifts...
>>50917247it might be alright to be weak...
>>50917262Vile creature will scam you out of your children.
We really need more yanhu threadsThey were so much fun
>>50917262No no no no I'm better than this I'm better then this
>>50912493>>50912531why have one when you can have both? the other girl will automatically gravitate closer once you bagged her friend
>>50917303Then you end up being just a sperm donor kicked out of the shrine so Reimu and Marisa can be wives with each other (canon)!
>>50917262I like this fox more, though...
>>50917312Imagine tricking everyone into thinking you're dating Marisa when it's a fox & you are about to cause an incident
>>50917325I just want the fox desu
i want the schizo zoomer girlfriend. imagine the freaky sex
>>50911747i would find a way to get invited to the scarlet devil mansion and silently read at the library until one day patchy and i strike a conversation. im okay with doing this for years. id be happy either way if we never talk or get close.
>>50917421i find the assistant a bit more approachable
>>50911747Shou. I think realistically she's probably one of the more sane individuals in Gensokyo atleast going off of what little there is of her in the print works, though even if she wasn't I would still throw my life away trying to get her attention. I would happily practice Buddhism if it meant getting to live with her, and joining her for the drinks she sneaks behind Byakuren's back sounds like bliss. I would literally kill to take Nazrins place in a heartbeat... Its just not fair
Do not wander the mountain alone...
>>50917665it's okay i found a friend
>>50917679Not a dog! That's a wolf!!!
>>50911747>vengeful spirit
>>50917303Being stuck in a love triangle between Reimu and Marisa sounds like hell. Though it's also funny imagine them fighting over poor Anon.
>>50918709It's fun until you catch a stray master spark to the face or a stray needle to the bair and tackle.