Besides the traditional methods (crosses, garlic & stakes), what are some other solid ways of defending yourself from vampires?
>>64362409From Yupiel? Muh diq, evidently.
>>64362422Your dick is not a weapon. Try again.
Matter 5, turn the vampire into a lawn chair.
Rock.Dick.Rock Dick.
muh dik!
Obligatory brick.
>>64362409Reliquiary silver HP, tipped with blessed mercury, preferably .454 Casull, .50-70 Govt., .50AE or any other calibre used in the self loading pistols or a revolvers.
>>64362409DecapitationImmolation
>>64362409Emm I guess put mah dik into garlic salsa and then use it?
Brick dickDick brickDrick bick
Weaponized Massive DickWMDYES
>>64362518Pure silver Macedonian processed mercury ammunition…in Marvels NNA9 cartridges…Thirty nine centimeters long weighing sixteen kilograms with thirteen millimeter armor piercing rounds…The Jackal! IT'S PERFECT WALTER!That or a break-action 30mm Avenger rifle with iron sights.
every night before you go to sleep hook yourself up to a dialysis machine filled with aids blood and put it on a timer to fill you up with your regular blood when the sun rises.Not a weapon but a defense against vampires.the machine needs to coated in a thin film of silver unless the hellspawn will just steal your prime blood right out of the box.
Their smugness vexes me greatly.
>>64362425Of course it is, armor piercing, high capacity weapon of war at that
Extreme trauma.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibAdLA16uEAhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIstK5xcHXw
>>64362425it is for keeping bitches away
>>64362409UVC. Just wear sunglasses so you don't damage your corneas.
>>64362409Love.
>>64362645Depends on the lore. Won't work against Hellsing full vampires. Artificial UV don't work against VtM vampires (at least in Bloodlines in the Fu Syndicate).
>>64362682>(at least in Bloodlines in the Fu Syndicate).they cheaped out and used UVA bulbs
>>64362688Allright Adolf. Also, if we trust Vampire Bender, vampires don't like triple aught in the face.
>>64362409.32 caliber handguns :>)
>>64362682There is no way they can tell artificial UV from real UV, if that's the case they must be reacting to something else that sun is emitting
>>64362409Other Vampires.
>>64362760The gross incandescence of the Sun must not be underestimated.>I will stay behind, to gaze at the Sun!>The Sun is a wondrous body, like a magnificent father!>If only I could be so grossly incandescent!
>>64362760VtM vampires are reacting to a curse from god. Not UV light.That's how WoD worked. There was a case of a vampire being successfully repelled by an investment bro using his credit card as a holy symbol because he truly believed in the almighty dollar, and that weakness was based on faith.
>>64362771Preach, bröther.
>>64362409a second sunrise
>>64362409Yeah
>>64362409*sigh* really Yupiel? Again? Thirsty slut aren't you.>unzips dick
>>64362873Make sure you use a metal cockring that is a little bit small so she can have more blood from your now-purple dick.
>>64362409brick
What would happen if you used chemical or other unconventional weapons on a vampire? A nerve agent probably won't kill them because, they don't have to breathe, but would it interfere with thinking and/or motor function? Likewise, would poisons, venoms, enzymes, or corrosive solutions have any effect? If you slipped them polonium tea, tricked them into falling into lime pit or acid bath, or dropped coral snakes on them, would that hurt them badly enough for you to kill them with the usual stuff?
>>64362906>enters mist formOk, what now? The brick is useless.
>>64363017I curse the vamp with the taco bell I ate earlier.
>>64363017Fart on it
>>64362425No, but it would repel her quite effectively.
>>64363017Dehumidifier
>poorly concealed vampire coomer threadgrow up
>>64363155no
>>64362409>Chapter 3 never everAw man that sucks...
>>64362409Not taking out loans.Not putting your money in banks.Checking who owns the company you work for.Checking who owns the companies that make products you purchase.Not voting for those affiliated with vampires or the state of vampirael.
>>64362698
>>64363255sodomy with Iori!
>>64363201I blame the nagatoro garbage becoming mainstream for that. Generic trash ruins everything.
>>64362425I wouldnt need a weapon because ill use my dick to tame her therefor avoiding the need for weapon
>>64363827>ill use my dick to tame herYou'll be the one getting tamed.
>>64362409The best defence is the fact that they don't exist, so anything you do that makes you feel better will work.
>>64362518>>64362546If you are gonna go Hellsing, at least drop the vid.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHyTmPA-xQM
>>64363864i can live with that :)
>>64362906
good thread
>>64362409"In the Middle Ages, an Inquisition-led population alerted to vampires' depredations nearly wiped out the Kindred's millennia-old society. How much more easily, the Inner Circle shudderingly wonders, could a human population of six billion, armed with napalm, phosphorus rounds and nuclear weapons, dispose of the parasites in its midst?" - VtMB
>>64364076best body texture?
>>64364208(me)shit didnt mean to (you) you
>>64364209(me)fuck wrong board
>>64362409impregnating and leaving her incapacitated for nine months
Can vampires partake of the Eucharist?
>>64362831>There was a case of a vampire being successfully repelled by an investment bro using his credit card as a holy symbol because he truly believed in the almighty dollar,holy fucking shit, i could only dream of being that level of hustler
>>64364638this guy is smart
Don't let them in.
>>64364638You can't impregnate vampires, I've tried this over and over again and it never works. Quit spreading this lie.
>>64365024Will Shindol ot Butcha ever finish their vampire series or they're going to run around in circles for years>>64364076>>64362409The new (shit) editions of VtM have the vampires so thoroughly outclassed by normal humans it's not even funny. The Tremere leadership got droned like Ukrainians in a trench, bar Antediluvian-tier shit a normal vampire is completely fucked against prepared humans, even compared to the 90ies of the original setting the development in equipment is staggering.
>>64365856just think about how fucked vamps would be nowadays. vampires are just serial killers with extra steps. there is reason why serial killer started to go the way of the dinosaur the moment modern forensics started to be widely implemented and everyone got a smartphone.
>>64364208>>64364209>>64364212roflmao, no worries man
>>64362425Yes it is, it's a choking hazard
>>64365856I mean, to some degree that's the value of the masquerade, no? Vamps thoroughly outclass unprepared humans, but are themselves thoroughly outclassed by prepared humans. As such a vampire cannot allow the humans to know of their existence, lest they be totally outclassed>playing ttrpgs written after '08lol, lmao evenI'm a zoomer and even I know shit fell off hard
>>64365888White Wolf wasn't coherent in their writing and worked with some of the most atrocious pre-conceived ideas you can think of, and for a moment let us forget that in the VtM universe normal mankind is pretty much ruled by a bunch of technomages with orbital artillery that consider vampires borderline "not worth exterminating", but there's still quite the differences between the 90ies and today. Advancements in surveillance an' shit, and everyone has easier access to heavier weaponry compared to some 90ies Hunter. In the end it's the contest between a predator with in-built abilities and a society that went from muskets to full auto AR with expanding bullets.
>>64365898I suppose that's the trick of humanity. We kill off all our predators to be at the top of the food chain. I'm sure that there's some kind of coexistence possible with them but it's infeasible without having the vamps shatter the masquerade and forcing them to stop being the parasites that they are.Granted, if the masquerade is shattered in a non-peaceful manner, how long for companies to start selling incendiary silver rounds explicitly for the removal of vampires? Maybe a month? Maybe a year? Either way, chances are most Vamps nowadays just larp as night shift workers and hope no one notices certain peculiarities about them or are just straight luddites in some underdeveloped part of the world.
>>64365915if I'm not mistaken in the nu-lore the masquerade was broken. governments and other powerful organizations such as the Church became aware. they didn't leak it to the general public but did a pretty number on the camarilla and other sects, lots of "gas explosions" ect.
>>64365930that brings up so many fkin questionsEg. Why aren't the vampires funding a bunch of politicians so that they can't be easily attacked without congressional repercussions (like you would see if you raided jeff bezos's home)?Why do all of these orgs know they exist but not even some small shithole like Albania leaks their existence to the wider world?Why would these government agencies proactively decide to attack vampires instead of just bargaining with the camarilla to have some mutual aid and perhaps the two working together?Why do I want to see Seal Team 6 but with vampires instead of humans getting DoD funding to wipe out a sabbat stronghold and/or the three gorges dam?
>>64365974idk, I only skimmed the lore at my lgs to see if the new ed was worth picking up, it wasn't
>>64365987yea, fair enoughI'm going to go back to reading my sci-fi slop (if you want to know its picrel)have a good one man
>>64365992>fatejust 1d20 away from rolling for anal circumferencebest of luck to you fren
>>64365190you are not trying hard enough
>>64365888Well, yeah. If you don't expect someone to suddenly bite your neck and drain the life out of your body then it's going to catch you off guard. That's why the three rules to live by are>be polite >be professional >have a plan to kill everyone you meet
>>64365974White Wolf lore doesn't make any sense and it's better not to even try. Nu-lore simply wants vamps to be far below the power totem pole for "roleplaying purposes" (let's not start kultur war because we both know the reason for that) and being hunted by powerful gov orgs is an excuse for that. Also, I repeat myself, the Vamps are kind of small fry in the WotD, there's the Mages/Technocrats managing reality/reality deviants and what's acceptable. >>64365915Once, the vampire fed on the lower rungs of society, losers, homeless and whores. Now they're the homeless and the whores. Kind of fun setup. We are all going to be nuked for offtopic, right?
>>64366216Sauce?
Regarding stakes: if I hypothetically wished to dispatch assorted things that go bump in the night using a muzzle-loader, then how feasible would it be to shoot a stake out of it?Would the blast significantly damage (or even disintegrate) the stake? If so, could that be mitigated with a lighter powder charge, and/or only loading it after a musket ball?>inb4 "it would make more sense to shoot it from a crossbow instead"sure, but I still want to know how feasible it is with a musketeven if it would only shower burning splinters over anything within a foot or two of the muzzle, with wicken/rowan wood it might still have an application as anti-witchcraft chaff
>>64362682worth noting is that you CAN however reflect sunlight and have it effect a vampire in VtM. a little bit of correspondence and a buddy in the void engineers and you can point a pocket sun at any vampire you run into.
>>64365974>and/or the three gorges damBecuase DoD doesn't fancy the thought of chinese nukes wiping the US from national existence? Duh?
What's the viability of stake guns?
>>64366295Dragal by Butcha-U. This one >>64365024 is Yukizuri Nocturne by Shindol and OP is Lady Yupiel's Servant by 774, they all have sequels. >>64366577I would not put a wooden stake in my muzzle-loader, despite modern construction I'm not too keen on having it blow up if the barrel gets plugged in some weirdo way. Do not take risks.>>64366698They're fantasy guns. I wonder how they did the prop in Blade, though.
>>64362409I’d probably grab her and pull her to the ground and start elbowing her in the head until it caves in. Then I kiss whatever is left that vaguely resembles a face.
>>64362425According to the ATF it's a "destructive device"
>>64362409>what are some other solid ways of defending yourself from vampires?marriage
>>64362409
>>64367158Dude, this is a SFW board...
>>64367158soft... hands......
>>64366797Such a shame there's no Blade game. Also how come there's no more Wesley Snipes Blade movies? The guy probably works for peanuts nowadays.
>>64367857Akshually, her hands are stone cold.
>>64362409she is flat
>>64368341just as god intended
>>64368030He's in Marvel Rivals, second newest character currently, after Angela, he'll be third newest once DareDeveil drops on the tenth. He's pretty fun to play and throws out a bunch of lines from the movies, like if you kill the enemy team's Blade he says that there's only one Blade, only ever gonna be one Blade.
>>64368341This fits, what with vampirism being a curse from God. No wonder vampire chicks are such cunts if getting turned means they lose their tits.
>>64368432All the blood they drink goes to their tits, that's why they do it.
>>64362409garlic doesn't work. This is a psyop from Big Vamp to get you to season yourself.The real answer is individually blessed silver screw-tip solids in .45 Colt, fired from a handgun with every single part individually blessed before reassembly.or a brick.
>>64368341out of 10
>>64369319goddamn it I was going to reply exactly the same thing
>>64363886>dubbedPlease consider suicide.
>>64362831And they can become less vulnerable to sunlight by being virtuous. Cainites that have reached Golconda can tolerate even direct sunlight for a time.
>>64362698But it made it worse for me. Decades ago I was a normie running after pussy like a retarded neanderthal but now I have zero interest in real women and exclusively fap to little girls
chat is this real? saved from a previous thread
>>64370128Why would the Catholic Church allow ANY vampires to exist? They would eradicate all of them without a second thought.
>>64362698>tranimeAnime website, newfag
Remi's feet STINK! They're a bioweapon!
>>64370295Silly anon, vampires don't STINK.
>>64370318but /jp/ told me she didn't wash them since the renaissance
>>64370321Yes but the ancient build up of musk is pleasantly fragrant, therefore it doesn’t stink.
>>64370325how does she smell?
>>64368030He was a cunt in the set so no director wanted to work with him anymore. And then the whole thing about taxes happened.
>>64362409halberd
>>64370441
i still have her patchits kinda embarrassing to wear it in public tho
>>64370138Because vampires are also god's creations. They are the predator as humans are prey, and you could argue that having the scary predators around brings people to god.
>>64362425
>>64371088gotta love the SM 79 in the background. they look so goofy.
>>64370584>Kinda
>>64371517A little bit.
Does it qualify as the light of day?
>>64371088I'm dying.
>>64370329Smells like salty coins and milk.
>>64362760Weakness to sunlight is a conceptual weakness not physical one. Much like how a vampire is repelled by a wooden cross but not by wood. It specifically has to be light being cast by the sun.
>>64372973
>>64362409Physical wounds are fleeting; vampires only fear wounds that impale or inflame. Water burns like acid, and fledglings are devastated by sunlight's touch.
>>64373386But what about venoms, chemical agents, radiological poisons, and more conventional poisons, like methyl mercury?
>>64373430At least in the elder scrolls, vampires are immune to disease/poison since they're already dead
I give her the cock
>>64373458A hemotoxic snake bite should weaken them since it affects their lifeblood. Likewise, things which dispose of corpses, like lime pits or maggots ought to have some effect.
>>64373641Pires are survivable in all kinds of environments
>>64362409making your house a mirror maze
>>64362518Alucard looks crosseyed with those glases.Now you can't unsee it.
ANON STOP TRYING TO HIT ME WITH A BRICK
>>64370584where to cop?
>>64371920/k/, maximum yield one of those can carry and total weight therein, asking for a friend?
>>6436240912 gauge 000 buckshot to the face, don't matter if the pellets are lead or silver. It's pretty much a decapitation for all intents and purposes. Then unsheathe your machete and cut the rest of its head off before it regenerates.
>>64365974>Eg. Why aren't the vampires funding a bunch of politicians so that they can't be easily attacked without congressional repercussions (like you would see if you raided jeff bezos's home)?The literal FBI is employing hunters in collaboration of the the Church. Even the President is aware.
I dazzle them with the power of numerical oujia,
If any of you were real otaku and not filthy casuals, you'd know Yoshitaka Amano already had killing Nobles figured out in Vampire Hunter D.Orbital-Drop Stake Bombardment into coffins.Yes it's canonical. Remember, Bloodlust from 2001 has a gothic orbital launch vehicle as a major plot point. And the castle of Dracula's Consort is also a spaceport.>>64362409>>64362605Did this character get *this* 4chinz-famous from starring in just a SINGLE futa_on_male / futadom hentai manga?Or is there some larger story
>>64374560>Did this character get *this* 4chinz-famous from starring in just a SINGLE futa_on_male / futadom hentai mangawhat are you talking about there's no futa. Also it's more than one doujin. Also the author is quite famous because he made some unhinged urethral sounding porn, ape rape, and then got healed by canonical naruhina and went on to create nagatoro and stopped drawing porn.
>>64374420i honestly forgotask the Patch thread, its one of the well known sellers
>>64374663unless my looking was wrong PK made it and no longer does so very sad
>>64374569>healedRuined you mean. Nagatoro is shit outside of the original collection where she was a legitimate bully instead of a shit love interest character.
>>64374719Fucking this. We'll never get good works from him again after nigatoro became so successful.
>>64374560Are both of the Vampire Hunter D adaptations good to watch? I can't find a 80ies version that's not dubbed but I dimly remember both the 80ies and the 2000ies version being held in high regard.>>64373386Raziel, stop posting on horny threads and get back to the whatever cycle of guilt and destiny you have to work on. >>64371088>>64372437Ignacio Noe, The Convent of Hell. Argie artists should get more recognition.
>>64374666if youre willing to pay for shipping i could send it your wayi dont really wear enough clothes that allow patches anyways and i bought a shitload so i can part with one
>>64374719>>64374730Are you lads legitimate psychopaths?If so then I can understand your grievances, if not then you’re retarded because Nagatoro is fantastic.
>>64374014Can I hit you with my dick instead?
>>64370820You could also easily argue that vampires are a perversion of God's creations and should be eradicated.
>>64375662But that would be a much more difficult position to defend.
>>64375696Would it really? Highly doubt in the 1300s Catholic Church there would be any voices ready to stand up for vampires and argue that their existence should be allowed.
>>64375854From a logical standpoint yes, not an emotional one. If there is an omnipotent and benevolent god, and vampires exist, then obviously vampires have to be a part of his plan. Who is man to decide which parts of god's plan are acceptable and which are not?
>>64375854It depends on time and region. Contrary to popular belief, the Spanish inquisition was rather sane and logical. They explicitly regarded witchcraft accusations as primarily born out of misunderstanding or personal grievance. I think there's a decent chance vampires would be accepted depending on which kind of vampires we're talking about.If they start bursting into flames upon seeing the cross, or being splashed with holy water, that'd be a bad look. Or if they're literal dead bodies reanimated. But if it's more of the infection or even cursed human style vampire, I believe they would be accepted.
>>64376031>Contrary to popular belief, the Spanish inquisition was rather sane and logical.I remember reading somewhere that thieves and other petty criminals would blaspheme when they were caught in order to be turned over to the inquisition because they'd get off much easier that way with a couple of lashes or something like that.
>>64376031IIRC, it was a perfect storm of the Church discovering that many of the leading Cathars were vampires, followed by an influx of foreign (and much more openly acting) Egyptian vampires into Europe following a jihad against supernaturals in the Mamluk sultanate that lead to the Church establishing the Shadow Inquisition to target vampires.
>>64362444Matter doesn't work on Cainites, you need to use Matter and Life simultaneously to transform them.
>>64376169Maybe not for that, but I can still turn the air around them into steel. Let's see them suck me from inside their shiny new coffin.
>>64376532With enough potence that would only be an obstacle.
